


Let's Go Burn Down Your House

by minx4572



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alpha Clarke Griffin, Alpha Octavia Blake, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Fluff and Smut, BAMF Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Costia (who was never Lexa's lover), F/F, F/M, G!P, It's an emotional roller coaster at first, Kidnapping, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Omega Lexa (The 100), Omega Raven Reyes, Unplanned Pregnancy, clexa baby
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:08:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 24
Words: 109,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28048230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minx4572/pseuds/minx4572
Summary: After the betrayal at the mountain, Clarke runs away, and it is almost 10 months before she returns, and only then because she has been feeling ill and her water sources have run dry.On her travels back to her people, she finds the one person she thought she never wanted to see again, and she learns that something precious has been stolen from her, something she didn't even know existed.Journey with Clarke and Lexa as they rekindle their relationship and forge new alliances in order to get back what has been stolen from them.
Relationships: Abby Griffin/Marcus Kane, Anya/Raven Reyes, Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Eric Jackson/Nathan Miller, Octavia/Lincoln, others to be tagged as the develop
Comments: 923
Kudos: 837





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Here we go again. I can't help myself, and I have written another A/B/O, only this time, Clarke is the alpha. I know there are some out there that don't like Clarke as an alpha, but I hope you will give this story a chance. She's not your typical alpha while Lexa is not your typical omega.
> 
> Also, please be warned that this chapter contains a character hurt during a medical procedure. It seems deliberate and harsh, but we will find out exactly what happened in the following chapters, and we will learn that things are not as they seem. I just wanted to give the warning because I don't want to trigger anyone. 
> 
> Please be aware of the tags.

Let’s Go Burn Down Your House

Clarke rolled over and groaned. When she opened her eyes, they were met with another blue sky, another fucking cloudless blue sky. She was sick of the sunshine and heat, she was sick of waking up hot and sweaty, and she was sick of feeling sick. It hadn’t rained in weeks. In those same weeks, Clarke had not been feeling well. She’d had almost constant pain in her lower abdomen, and about a week ago that pain had been so intense that it had brought her to her knees. She had felt like her insides were being ripped out. 

With that pain came unbearable sorrow and a feeling of emptiness so vast that tears had flowed from her eyes. The alpha couldn’t understand what was happening to her. Outwardly she was fine. She had no fever, she was able to hold down her food, and her energy level was normal. She just couldn’t figure out what was making her feel sick and hollow.

It had her thinking that maybe she needed to return to her people. If she was getting sick, she should at least go back long enough to get checked out. She didn’t want to die alone in the woods. It was funny, considering that when she had first run away from her people and Lexa’s betrayal, all she had wanted to do was die, or at least be forgotten about. Now, though, if she truly was ill, she didn’t want to be alone.

She had already been gone for almost ten months, and the only time she had seen another living soul was the time she was forced to go into an outpost to trade a panther skin for some arrowheads and a dagger. While there, the omega tradeswoman had treated the wounds on the back of her shoulder from when the panther had attacked. If she hadn’t gone when she did, her wounds would probably have festered and killed her.

The omega’s kindness had saved her that day. It was only too bad that the woman, Niylah, had wanted more than just to trade. The encounter had left Clarke feeling uncomfortable and shaken, and Clarke had gone running back into the woods. Since that time, she had forced herself to make do with only that which nature could provide. 

When she stood, she leaned back and cracked her spine. The ever-present pain was there, but it had changed. She was able to ignore it while she ate a few nuts and a piece of dried meat. She washed it down with the last of her water. She packed up her meager belongings. She was going to have to leave the shelter that she had called her home for the past few months. Her water source had all but dried up, and that meant it was time to move on.

Clarke looked around at the lean-to that she had painstakingly built to keep herself warm and protected; not that she had needed warmth since summer had started. She had been nothing but warm for at least as long as it had been since it had rained. She couldn’t stand it. She had been hot and sweaty for too long, and she hadn’t been able to properly clean herself in ages. There hadn’t been enough water. 

With one last look over her shoulder, Clarke hefted her bag and headed away from the place she had called home for longer than any other place since the dropship landed. The only place she had ever lived for longer was while up on the Ark, and she had never considered that tin can her home. Her longing to come to Earth had made it impossible to think that the Ark would be her home forever. Little did she know that coming to Earth would bring nothing but pain and misery.

She walked for hours. She still hadn’t decided if she was going to return to her people, but it seemed her feet were taking her in that direction anyway. Arkadia was about a twenty hour walk on foot, so she had plenty of time to decide whether she wanted to go home or not; not that it was ever a home anyway.

It took longer than she hoped to find water, and when she did, it was a nearly dry creek bed. There were still a few pools of clean water in it, and fortune favored her because there were also a few fish trapped in the shallow pools.

She was about to fashion a spear to catch the fish when pain lanced through her body. She dropped the stick she had been sharpening. Bile rose in her throat, but somehow, she kept herself from throwing up. Wiping tears from her eyes, she straightened back up. When she did, she caught a scent that that had filled her dreams and her nightmares, and she thought she was imagining it. There was no way the scent flooding her nose was real. It couldn’t be. Not here so deep in the forest.

Clarke spun around, searching frantically with her eyes. What she had taken as part of the landscape before was now moving, and with each movement came a subtle, pained moan.

The alpha’s lips curled into a snarl. Heaped on the rocks of the creek bed was the person she both longed for and loathed to the point of being unhealthy. She didn’t care if the Commander of the 12 clans was writhing on the ground in agony. It was none of her concern.

The alpha rapidly picked up her belongings, and she was about to walk away when the omega lying on the rocks cried out again. Pain coursed through Clarke’s body forcing her to bend over and clutch at her stomach. Sour distress pheromones hit the alpha like a ton of bricks, and as much as she wanted to, she couldn’t walk away from the injured omega. Something was grievously wrong with the figure lying next to the creek bed. 

Clarke stared at the mass on the ground. She couldn’t see Lexa’s face, or even her hair as the Commander was covered with a thin grey, hooded cloak, but there was no denying it was her. Even being washed in pheromones, Clarke was able to detect the omega’s underlying scent. The omega smelled of smoke, freshly cut hay, and honey. The alpha didn’t want it to, but even with illness overlying it, the scent still drew Clarke in like a moth to a flame. It was hopeless. She would not be able to walk away from the injured woman. No alpha, not even Clarke, was able to walk away when an omega was injured, and no matter how much the blonde thought she hated Lexa, she did not want to see or feel her suffering. Even after so many months, and even after the Commander’s betrayal, the bond she felt to Lexa was too strong, and in the end, it could never be broken. Mating was for life, and for as much as the alpha now thought it was a mistake, for better or for worse, Lexa was her mate and would be forever.

The alpha took a step toward her fallen mate. She wasn’t sure Lexa was even aware of her presence. The omega was curled up in a fetal position and clutching at her abdomen. Lexa cried out, and once again, it caused Clarke to stagger. It hit the alpha that the pain she had been feeling all this time must not have been her own. She was feeling the pain of her mate, and for a moment she was shocked. 

The pair had mated on the eve of the battle with the Mountain. They had promised each other a future together, but when the man Emerson had come out of Mount Weather the next day and made a deal that Lexa couldn’t refuse, Clarke had had to watch as her new mate walked away from her. It was the pain of that betrayal that fueled the alpha during the takedown of the Mountain. That pain added to the pain of having to kill hundreds of people to save her own was what made her walk away. She couldn’t bear to look at those she had saved, not with knowing what she had done to get them back safely to Arkadia. 

She took another reluctant step toward her mate when all she wanted to do was run away. For just over nine months, she’d had some semblance of peace. It had taken a while, but she had come to realize that no matter how horrifying, she would do what she’d done in the Mountain again if it meant saving her people. It was that realization that made Clarke recognize that Lexa had done the same thing. She had saved her people. It was what any good leader would do, but it didn’t mean that it hurt Clarke any less.

Staring down at Lexa it was clear that the omega was not aware of her presence, even if the occasional word that slipped from the omega’s lips was Clarke’s name. Looking closely, the alpha could see that the omega was gravely ill, and Clarke couldn’t be certain because the distress pheromones were covering up almost every other scent in the forest, but she would swear that she smelled fetid, clotted blood. 

She reached down and removed the hood from Lexa’s head. The omega barely flinched. Her brow was sweaty, and she was burning with fever. Clarke didn’t even need to touch her to figure that out. She could feel the heat pouring off the omega. By removing the hood, the alpha was able to get a good look at the omega’s face. It was sallow and the skin beneath Lexa’s eyes looked so dark as to almost appear bruised. Her face was also puffy. Clarke removed the rest of the material covering the omega and she gasped. Lexa was not wearing any of her traditional clothing, nor did she have any of her weapons. What she was wearing was something that only a destitute person would wear. The clothes were shapeless and threadbare, and certainly did not provide protection for the omega. That is not what had Clarke gasping, however. What had the alpha running to the nearest tree so she could empty the contents of her stomach was the odor that hit her when the cloak was fully removed from Lexa’s lower body. The paltry shirt covering the omega did nothing to hide the blood and infection that was leaking from what could only be a large wound on Lexa’s abdomen.

When Clarke had recovered enough, she returned to Lexa’s side. The omega was still too ill to even realize that the alpha was there.

Clarke lifted the material of the omega’s shirt, and she wanted to wretch again. A horizontal wound spread across the omega’s belly, and it was clear to Clarke that this wound had not occurred in battle. The edges of the wound were too clean and too precise to have been made in the heat of a fight. It looked almost surgical, but whoever had made the wound…incision, Clarke guessed, had made a poor attempt at closing the large opening spreading across Lexa’s too pale skin. It was sutured, but many of them had pulled loose.

Looking at the incision, Clarke tried to figure out what could have happened to Lexa that would cause her to have such a wound.

As she stared, realization hit her squarely in the face. 

“No,” she whispered in horror. “No. No. No. No. No.” Clarke shook her head violently when reality came crashing down on her head. There was only one kind of incision that she could think of that looked like that, but it wasn’t possible. It couldn’t be possible. Her eyes filled with tears because the implications of what an incision like that meant were too much for Clarke to handle, because if what she was looking at was real, it meant that Lexa had sired a pup. There was no denying it. The poorly made incision on Lexa’s belly could only be the result of a cesarian birth.

She looked at the wound again, and then at the ill omega that it belonged to. If this was true, then why was Lexa not in Polis receiving the medical care she so obviously needed, and where was the pup? Where was Clarke’s child? What if it hadn’t survived and Lexa was trying to find her and let her know, or maybe the pup was well and in the Capitol, and Lexa had gotten sick while trying to tell her that she was a mother. That, however, didn’t explain the state of Lexa’s clothing. Deep within Clarke’s soul, she felt like something sinister had happened.

Pain and grief lanced through the alpha’s heart at that thought. Clarke was frantically trying to figure out what the hell was happening.

Without further thought, she picked Lexa up. It worried her that it was so easy to lift the omega. The woman had clearly lost a tremendous amount of weight.

Lexa’s head flopped back, and Clarke was forced to shift her weight so that she could support Lexa’s head. Once she had a good grip on the omega, she took off sprinting. She had to get Lexa to her mother as quickly as possible. She knew that if she stopped, Lexa would die. The mother of her pup would die, and she couldn’t let that happen. As much as she thought she hated the woman, she realized that this world needed Lexa. It needed its Commander to keep the 12 clans together, and it needed Lexa in it because if their pup was out there somewhere, the child deserved to know its mother. Clarke refused to admit that maybe, just maybe, she needed the omega in her life too.

As Clarke ran, she remembered all the good times she’d had with Lexa. The time they had spent together, in all reality, may have been short, but Clarke felt like she had lived a full life in that span of time.

That first meeting in the Commander’s tent was all it took for Clarke to start falling for the Commander. Lexa had exuded a strength to rival any alpha, but it was her omega sensibilities that made her such a good leader. She kept calm when others were ready to rip each other’s throats out over petty squabbles and disagreements, and she made decisions using logic instead of using her emotions or brute force. She had a control over herself like none the alpha had ever seen. 

The only time the omega had lost herself was the night before the battle with Mount Weather. She had been up late with Clarke going over every possible thing that could happen the next day. They had stood at Lexa’s map table and couldn’t help but gravitate toward one another. 

First there was a brushing of their hands, then an entwining of their pinky fingers. That had led to Clarke pushing a stray piece of hair out of Lexa’s eyes. When the alpha had done that, intense green eyes had stared back at her, and Clarke couldn’t help herself. She had leaned in for a kiss. That was the beginning of the end, at least for Clarke. There had been a frenzied pawing at each other’s clothing, and Lexa had led Clarke to the back of her tent where her private quarters were hidden behind a curtain. Clothes were discarded along the way, and by the time they reached the bed, they were both naked.

It had been the best night of Clarke’s life, and the decision to mate had been mutual. They didn’t know that the battle the next day would rip them apart. That night, after making exhaustive love to Lexa, Clarke had fallen asleep with Lexa wrapped in her arms. 

Once again, Clarke had Lexa wrapped in her arms, but this time, of course, it felt different. The woman in her arms was dying, and that fact pulled heavily at Clarke’s heartstrings; more heavily than the weight of the woman being carried through the forest because, like it or not, Lexa was Clarke’s mate. Like it or not, Clarke could not deny that she still wanted this woman, and like it or not, Clarke loved the omega Commander of the 12 clans.

Clarke travelled for hours before having to make a brief stop. As she got closer to Arkadia, there was more water. She stopped at the side of a small lake to quench her thirst. After gently depositing Lexa on the ground, she quickly drank her fill. When she got back to Lexa with a full canteen, she lifted the omega’s head and slowly dripped the cool liquid past dangerously pallid lips. 

Lexa, still unaware of her surroundings, coughed and sputtered but then eventually started to drink like a person denied the life-giving liquid for too long. The act of drinking exhausted the poor creature, and eventually she passed out again. Clarke realized that she needed to use this time to clean Lexa’s wound. She mentally kicked herself for not having done it earlier.

Clarke ripped a piece of her shirt off and drenched it several times in the water to get it as clean as possible before she went about cleaning the disturbingly black crust of blood and discharge from around the edges of the wound. Twice she had to cover her mouth and nose to recover from the terrible stench coming from the injury. 

She tore off another piece of cloth and tried to clean the flesh of the wound. The horror of the injury before her hit her then. The few stitches barely holding the wound together made her wonder why anyone had even bothered. The attempt to close the incision had been pathetic and seemingly done without care. What had happened that someone would treat the Commander in such a way? Even if she weren’t the Commander, Lexa deserved to be treated better than this.

A burning anger rose in Clarke’s belly. When she found out who had treated the omega, her omega, so carelessly, so sloppily, she would rip them apart. The anger filled the alpha’s chest and it spurred her into action. She finished cleaning Lexa’s wound, and then she roused the omega long enough to get her to drink some more water. 

For the briefest of moments, the omega’s green eyes flitted up to Clarke’s. There was a spark of recognition there, but then it was gone again. Lexa’s head flopped to the side. 

Clarke rummaged through her bag. Somewhere in there she knew there were a few sweet pieces of dried sap that she had pulled off the side of a tree. She didn’t know what it was, but she knew it contained sugars, and she had no doubt that Lexa’s were seriously low. She had no way of knowing when the last time was that Lexa had eaten something.

She carefully pried Lexa’s lips apart and placed the sweet resin under Lexa’s tongue, hoping it would slowly melt and that Lexa would swallow the little bit of nutrition it contained. She got out some food for herself and swallowed it without thought. She needed to get to Arkadia. She needed to save Lexa. 

She had Lexa in her arms again, and she took off. She ran until she couldn’t run anymore, and then she walked. She refused to stop, even when the overwhelming need overtook her. She trudged along, one foot in front of the other. 

It was fortunate that the moon was bright that night after darkness befell the sky. Only once did she stumble on an unseen root. Somehow, she was able to catch herself and not drop the precious cargo in her arms.

As she walked, the anger she carried for the omega started to disappear. The weak and fragile woman she was now desperately trying to save didn’t deserve her wrath or ire. Lexa had done what she needed to that day at the Mountain, just as Clarke had. In the end they had both done what needed to be done. The reason the alpha had been so angry was because Lexa had walked away from her, and that had hurt more than anything else that had happened that day.

As she stumbled along, she realized that as Commander, Lexa had had no choice in what she did that day. She’d had to save her people, and she’d had to do it without consideration of her new mate, and Clarke started to realize that walking away might have been just as painful for Lexa as it was for Clarke. The alpha considered that maybe if she hadn’t been so quick to run away that perhaps things would have been different.

The trek to Arkadia was getting more difficult. Clarke was nearing complete exhaustion. She had only stopped two more times. Once to rest her aching arms, and the other to give Lexa more water and reclean the wound. It worried Clarke that the opening continued to drain so heavily, and that the color of the drainage was not anything she had seen leave a human body before. She already knew Lexa’s body was ripe with infection. Because of the drainage, she worried it might be something her mother might not be able to treat.

When the lights of Arkadia finally showed through the trees, the sun was not yet up. Clarke figured she had been travelling for at least sixteen hours, and she was near collapse. By having been able to run at the beginning, she had been able to make it to her people in record time.

As she breached the tree line, she hoisted Lexa up in her arms. It really was amazing that she was still able to carry the woman. She had only taken five steps out of the woods before two large floodlights centered in on her and causing her to squinch her eyes. Because she was holding Lexa, she couldn’t raise her hand to shield them. It didn’t matter, she continued to move forward even though she couldn’t see.

In the distance, she could hear yelling, and she thought she heard the word “grounders,” and right there, Clarke realized her mistake. She didn’t look like the Clarke her people knew anymore. She probably looked more savage than the most savage Kongeda (coalition) warrior.

She had just placed Lexa softly on the ground and was standing up to raise her hands in the air when the first shots rang out. 

Clarke jumped in front of Lexa, shielding her with her body. The first shots missed, but then another round ripped through Clarke’s shoulder. 

She tried to yell out, but it had been so long since she had used her voice that it came out as a croak. She fell to the ground when the next bullet found her left side. She curled herself around her omega, continuing to protect her.

“I’m sorry, Lex. I tried.”

Blackness consumed her.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. The response to the first chapter of this has been overwhelming. I just love all of you. Thank you so much for the comments and kudos.

Chapter 2

Clarke woke up sweaty and hot. She groaned but didn’t open her eyes. Why was it that she couldn’t find a way to not wake up the same way every day? Just once she wouldn’t mind waking up cold, or at least comfortable. 

She tried to roll onto her side, but pain lanced through her right arm and left side. Using her left hand, she pushed the scratchy blanket off her and she suddenly understood where she was. She wasn’t in her lean-to. She was in Arkadia, and she’d been shot trying to save Lexa.

Oh no, Lexa, she thought. She opened her eyes but had to shut them again. The room she was in was too bright. 

“Lexa,” she cried out, but her voice was too weak to carry. “Lexa,” she tried again with a little more success.

When she didn’t get a response, she struggled to sit up. “Lexa.” Something or someone was holding her down.

“Shh, sweetheart, you need to calm down.” It was the voice she had longed to hear for months but had been too afraid to seek out. It was the voice of her mother.

It didn’t help. She needed to know if Lexa was still alive. Shaking her head, she cried out again. “Lexa.”

“Clarke. Open your eyes.” The command was such that the alpha obeyed. Abby was the only one that had ever able to get Clarke to listen.

“Mom,” she croaked when her eyes opened. “Too much light.”

She felt Abby move and suddenly the lights dimmed. “Where’s Lexa?” Clarke asked frantically.

“Clarke, honey…”

“Tell me where she is,” Clarke pleaded desperately. She wasn’t going to be able to calm down until she knew where her mate was and if she was alive. The effort of yelling was making her dizzy.

She felt Abby trying to calm her. “Look to your left, Clarke. She’s right next to you.”

Clarke did, and relief like she had never known washed through her, that was until she got a good look at her mate.

Lexa was lying on her back in the same bed as the alpha, utterly still except the rise and fall of her chest. Clarke would ponder how her mother had gotten such a large bed into medical later. Right now, her focus was on the omega. Her mate didn’t look good. Lexa’s normally tan skin was beyond pale, and she was hooked to every possible tube the hospital wing had to offer. The only tube missing was a ventilator tube, and for that Clarke was grateful. At least her omega was breathing on her own.

“Will…will she be okay?” Clarke asked not taking her eyes off her mate. She snaked her left hand out until she was able to touch Lexa’s side. There was an immediate response in the other woman and the heart rate on the omega’s monitor visibly slowed.

Her mother didn’t immediately answer. “Mom.”

She finally took her eyes off her mate in order to look at her mother, and her heart sank. Tears immediately began to slip from her eyes.

“She’s stable for now, sweetheart, but by the time she got here, she had already lost a lot of blood, and her wound was horribly contaminated. Her whole body is septic, but we are doing everything we can to fight the infection”

“Why is she so pale? Didn’t you give her any blood?” Clarke needed to know.

“We can’t…”

“What do you mean you can’t? If people aren’t willing to donate to her, then give her mine.” Clarke tried to yell, but her voice was still weak.

“It’s not that simple, Clarke.” Abby looked at her daughter with sympathetic eyes.

“Why not? Everyone on the Ark is a universal donor. Give her mine.” Clarke was starting to growl, even if what was coming out as a pathetic whine.

“Her blood isn’t like ours, honey. It’s not even red.” Abby was doing her best to keep her long-lost daughter calm.

“I don’t understand, what do you mean it’s not red.” The heart rate monitor attached to Clarke stared to beep faster.

“Her blood is black, Clarke. We’ve never seen anything like it.” Abby reached over to a table at the bedside and picked up a vial filled with black liquid. “This is her blood, Clarke.”

Clarke snatched up the stoppered glass tube. She held it to the light and then looked at her mate. She was beginning to feel hopeless. “If that’s true then you can’t save her, can you?”

“She’s strong. Already she has improved. We had to clean and cut away the bad flesh from her wound twice already, but it’s starting to improve, although, we will probably have to debride the wound one or two more times.”

Clarke found her mother with troubled blue eyes. She handed the vial back. She wanted her hand to be free so that she could touch her mate. Debridement was the process of scraping and cutting away bad tissue in a wound. It was helpful, but it could be horribly painful, and Clarke doubted the fallen Ark had enough supplies to waste them on the omega Commander who had betrayed their alliance. She tried to bury that thought deep in her subconscious. As much as she had wished for pain and despair to befall her mate after the betrayal at Mount Weather, that was gone now. Her only thoughts were of trying to make sure her mate lived.

“Has she woken up?” Clarke asked hopefully.

“Not really, the few times she did, she was delirious. She kept calling out for you. She kept thrashing on her bed and was going to hurt herself. It wasn’t until we put you two in the same bed that she finally calmed down. You started to improve as well after she was by your side.”

Another tear slipped from the alpha’s eye. She wondered, again, what would have happened if she hadn’t run away after the fall of Mount Weather. Maybe Lexa would have come back for her. Maybe she would have come back to try and make amends, to apologize to Clarke. Suddenly the alpha was full of regrets. She was also full of questions. “How long have I been out?”

“Two days. I had to do surgery to remove the bullets. Because of exhaustion and dehydration, it took longer for the anesthesia to wear off than we thought it would.” The doctor said regretfully. “The guards who shot you have been permanently suspended from duty,” Abby said as an afterthought. 

Clarke blinked. Two days. That wasn’t too bad. She looked at Lexa again. “Please tell me that her wound isn’t from what I think it is.”

There was a pause. “I can’t.” The doctor gave her pup a sad look. “It’s exactly what you think it is. You didn’t know she was pregnant?”

The alpha squeezed her eyes shut as yet another tear slipped down her cheek. “No.”

Abby caught the tear before it could hit the pillow. “Then where have you been Clarke? We all thought you were dead. I didn’t want to believe it, but you were gone for so long. Why didn’t you come back home? I didn’t even know that you had a mate.”

Clarke didn’t look at her mother. Instead, she pulled a long brunette lock of hair to her nose. The hair was grimy and unwashed, but it still held Lexa’s scent. She couldn’t explain it to her mother. She couldn’t tell her that for a long time she had hated herself for what she had done. She couldn’t tell Abby that she had mated with Lexa only for the omega to walk away from her the very next day, completely devastating her. She had broken when Lexa had walked away from her and be it alpha pride or simple disgust at herself, she couldn’t tell her mother that.

“Do you think the pup survived?” Her voice was barely a whisper.

Abby sat on the side of the bed and stroked Clarke’s hair. “I don’t know. I don’t think we will know until the Commander wakes up. Do you know what happened to her?”

Clarke shook her head.

“That wound, the incision, it was done carelessly, almost as if whoever was doing it didn’t care about Lexa’s safety, or it was done in such a hurry that there wasn’t time to close her up properly. I can’t be sure which it was. I will be honest. She’s lucky to have survived.”

“W-will she be able to have more pups if she wants?” Clarke was desperate to know.

Abby was silent for too long, and Clarke started to cry in earnest. “I don’t know, but I think it would take a miracle. I’m so sorry, honey.” Abby finally said. 

A sob escaped before she could stop it. “Can you leave me alone with her for a while?”

Abby only nodded and handed her daughter the call button on the bed. She knew Clarke would call when she needed her. She was almost out of the room when she stopped and looked back.

“Clarke, if she can survive one more day, I think she will be out of the woods. We have someone close to her getting her the blood she needs.” She was out of the door before Clarke could ask how that was possible.

The alpha blinked at the closed door. She repeated her mother’s last words in her head over and over without comprehending. Until a few minutes ago, she had no idea that people existed who had black blood. Who was out there that would help the Arkadians get blood for the Commander, and why couldn’t they just send Kane or someone like Monty to go and get it? She realized that there was a huge puzzle before her, and she was missing almost all the pieces, and try as she might, she couldn’t make any of her thoughts fit. 

She did her best to scoot as close to her mate as possible. The pain coursing through her made it difficult, but she didn’t care. Just looking at her mate, she knew Lexa’s pain was far worse, even if the woman was unconscious.

By the time she was able to plaster herself against her mate, she was hot and sweaty…again. It was the story of her life recently. She didn’t let that stop her from forcing herself onto her side and moving her right shoulder in a way that she knew probably tore at her stitches. She didn’t care. She wiggled and struggled until she was able to rest her right arm carefully over her mate’s chest, being mindful of the healing wound just below her arm on Lexa’s stomach. 

She nuzzled her face into Lexa’s side and started to purr, and for the first time in almost a year she fell asleep into a dreamless sleep.

When she woke again, she made sure she could feel the warmth of her mate next to her. Even with closed eyes it was easy to tell that it had gotten dark outside. She was about to open her eyes, but she sensed that someone was in the room with them. She knew immediately that it wasn’t her mother. She tried to subtly scent the air and caught whiffs of someone who was familiar to her but could not place. It made her nervous, but maybe it was just one of the apprentices Abby had working under her. 

“Klark kom Skaikru, I know you are awake.”

Clarke squinched her eyes shut, sure that she was having an auditory hallucination. The voice she just heard was that of a ghost. Someone she knew had been dead for a long time.

“Open your eyes, yu spichen branwoda (you goddamn fool).” 

Clarke couldn’t help it, she started to tremble. She was hurt, her mate was hurt, and she was tired. It was making her hear things that she shouldn’t.

A finger poked her right arm making her yelp. Her eyes flew open, and she saw it; she saw the ghost in the room.

“A-anya. Go away. You’re not real.” Clarke couldn’t hide the tremor in her voice.

The finger poked her again, and Clarke had to bite back the squeak that tried to escape. “No ghost can do that, can it?”

Clarke looked at the dead woman. “I…I don’t know.” She rubbed at her eyes hoping that if she did the image of Anya would go away. “I’ve never met a ghost before.” Her voice still sounded creaky even to her own ears.

The ghost rolled its eyes. “Oh, for jok’s (fuck’s) sake. I am real, you branwoda (fool/idiot).”

Clarke shook her head. “No, you are not. I saw you die.”

“No, you didn’t,” Anya countered. “You saw me get shot.”

“I…I…” Clarke reached out with a floundering hand. Anya caught it swiftly and looked at her with intense copper eyes. The alpha General leaned down so that the blonde could more easily touch her.

“See, nothing but flesh and blood.” Anya raised her eyebrows. “You thought I could be killed that easily?”

“But…” Clarke was getting dizzy. She thought she had watched Anya die. “I saw you get shot. I tried to stop the blood…you stopped breathing.”

The door to the room opened. “And then that fucker of a guard knocked your ass out with the butt of his rifle.”

It seemed that Clarke was hellbent on crying, because when she saw her friend, when she saw Raven, she couldn’t hold in her sob. She looked the omega up and down. She was wearing her trademark red jacket and a rigid brace on her left leg. 

“I’m so happy you are okay,” Clarke stammered out. Suddenly remembering that everything around her was not okay, she painfully twisted herself so that she could see Lexa. A whoosh of air left her when she saw that her mate looked better, even if it was only marginally so.

Lexa was still on her back, as if she hadn’t stirred at all since Clarke fell asleep next to her, but she wasn’t as pale. As her eyes roved over the omega, she spied a new tube sticking out of Lexa’s arm. She followed the line up to an IV pole and saw a bag of black blood hanging from it.

There were so many questions Clarke wanted to ask, but she didn’t know where to begin, so she thought that maybe it was best to start at the beginning.

She was about to ask a question when she fell into a coughing fit. Anya poured water out a pitcher at the bedside into a cup and held it to Clarke’s lips for her to drink from. The blonde’s hands were too shaky to hold it herself. It was an act of kindness she would never have expected to receive from the tough alpha who at one time had beaten the crap out of her.

“Th-thank you, now can you please tell me how it is that you are alive and with my people?”

“That’s easy. Abby saved her life,” Raven chimed in.

“But how? Why?”

“Because Mama G is an amazing woman with a big heart. When she saw them bringing Anya’s body into camp, she ran over to check her vitals, and Anya was still alive…barely. She did emergency surgery and saved her.” Raven moved to stand next to Anya so that her hip was touching the alpha’s.

Clarke noted their proximity to one another but wanted to know how it was that Anya was still there, and why, even if Abby had saved her, she wasn’t a prisoner.

“Oh, Clarkey, you are going to hurt your big alpha brain if you don’t calm down,” Raven teased. “All you need to know is that Anya was a prisoner, but because she was recovering from her surgery, she was being held in medical and not in a cell.” 

Raven went on to explain that Anya wouldn’t eat or drink anything in order to help herself, and the omega mechanic had watched for days as the “ridiculously stubborn alpha” worked on killing herself.

“I wasn’t going to let that happen. Mama G worked too hard to save her stubborn ass.”

“How did you even know she was there?” Clarke wondered.

“Physical therapy for my leg, duh.” Raven snarked like that explained everything. “I showed up there every day for my session, and I could see her lying on her bed. There was something about Anya that called to me, and I couldn’t let her suffer any more. She hated it at first, but every day after my P.T. I would talk to her and try to get her to at least drink some water.” The omega smiled, remembering something. “Finally, one day, I poured the whole damn pitcher on her head.”

Anya chuckled and gave a toothy grin. Clarke had a flashback to a time when the alpha had given her that same frightening grin. It was after their fight by the dropship, and Anya was telling Clarke that she had fought well. “That was when I knew that ai strik sora (my little bird) was the one for me.” Anya added in.

Raven, whose hair was normally pulled back in a ponytail had it down. She pulled it back to expose her neck, and Clarke’s eyes practically bugged out of her head. She looked from Raven to Anya and back again.

“You’re mated? Holy shit,” Clarke exclaimed.

“Yeah, we mated in secret, but once your mom found out, because there’s no hiding anything from your mother, she insisted that Anya become part of Arkadia, just like Lincoln is.”

Clarke was floored at how easily her people had accepted Anya and Lincoln into their fold.

“You’re not the only one who mated in secret,” Raven said, winking at the alpha.

Clarke looked at the still form of her mate again. She sidled over so that she was touching as much of Lexa as possible.

“How did you get blood for her?” Clarke asked Anya. “I know for a fact your blood is just like mine.” 

“I went to Polis and stole one of my favorite nightbloods.” She stated matter-of-factly like Clarke should know what this meant.

Clarke’s confusion must have been clear because Raven chimed in. “A nightblood is a person with black blood. They are sacred, and only a person with it can ascend and become Commander.”

“Okay,” the blonde said stupidly. A new realization hit Clarke. If Anya had gone to Polis, then maybe she knew about the pup.

“Is…do you know…is our pup alive, Anya? Please tell me if you know anything.” Clarke’s voice was edging on hysteria.

Anya shared a grim look with Raven who gave the alpha a nod. “Your pup, she is alive, but she is so heavily guarded that I was not able to steal her away for you.”

“Steal her?”

Anya was about to explain when tired green eyes popped open. “Klark.”

Pain be damned. Clarke was on her side and leaning on an elbow before Lexa could even blink.

“You’re here.” Lexa whispered. 

“I’m here.” Clarke struggled until she could pepper her mate with kisses.

“Ai hod yu in (I love you), Klark. I am so sorry for what I did.” Lexa’s words were barely a whisper.

The beleaguered alpha was crying again. Those were words she never thought she would hear.

The next ten minutes were filled with silence and tears as the two mates refamiliarized themselves with each other. Lexa was weak, but her hands roamed over any part of her alpha’s body that she could touch.

Finally, Lexa spoke again. Her voice was that of a woman who had been through too much, but it was also filled with a steely determination to say what she wanted to say. “I didn’t think I was going to find you in time.”

“Shh, Lex, you need to rest,” Clarke tried to coax. 

“No, not until I tell you everything that’s happened.”

Anya and Raven, who had been silent as the injured mates got reacquainted, shuffled on their feet. Raven was moving to fill a cup for Lexa when the Commander finally took notice of the other two people in the room.

It would have been comical, how big Lexa’s eyes got when she saw Anya, if not for the tears that started to leak from them. “S-seda (teacher).”

Anya moved to place her hand carefully on Lexa’s cheek. “Sha (yes), Heda.”

Lexa shook her head sadly. “Ai laik Heda no mou (I am commander no more).”

“Bullshit,” Raven exclaimed. “That imposter on the throne is no Commander. Ontari is a usurper who supplanted herself as Heda by force. There is unrest, and the people are still with you.”

“It is true, Heda,” Anya said, “the only reason she still holds the throne is because she has closed the gates of Polis and is treating the citizens of the Capitol as prisoners. Her gonas (warriors) keep a tight rein on things there, but outside the gates, the Kongeda is still strong, and the leaders of the clans still stand behind you, all except Azgeda. It is only because Azgeda has so many warriors that Ontari is able to keep control of the city.”

“Wh-where is my pup? Please tell me if she is still alive?” Lexa asked frantically.

Anya gave Lexa a bleak smile. “She is, but she too is heavily guarded. She is being cared for by Titus. No one sees the pup except him, Ontari, one wet nurse, and the fisas.”

Clarke could feel the relief pouring off Lexa knowing that their child was alive. The alpha was still in the dark about all that had happened during her self-isolation, but she would have to wait to get the answers to her questions. She could tell that Lexa was struggling to stay awake, so she started to pump out soothing pheromones, helping her omega to relax.

“Lex, you need to rest. We know that our pup is alive. That’s all we need to know for now. Sleep for just a few more hours, and then we will all talk some more.”

Tired grey-green eyes shifted to look at her, and a hand reached out to pull Clarke to her. “Kei (okay), Klark, but only for a few hours.”

Clarke was surprised at how easily Lexa acquiesced, and it confirmed just how exhausted and ill the omega still was. Her mate, before the fall of the Mountain, wouldn’t have held back knowing that a pup was in need of her, but Clarke also knew that Lexa was wickedly smart and was probably already strategically planning how to get their pup, and Polis, back.

The alpha watched as Lexa fell asleep. She looked at Anya. “When she wakes back up, you are going to tell us everything that has been happening, and then we are going to figure out how to get our Commander back on the throne and get our pup into our arms. If it means I need to rip down the walls of Polis one brick at a time with my bare hands, I will do it. There isn’t a force on Earth that will stop me from getting to my baby girl.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, because I believe in miracles, I am not ruling out that Lexa can't have more pups. I am not ruling it in either. Her trek to find Clarke took a huge toll on her, and she's got an enormous amount of healing to do. I have obviously taken liberties with all the medical stuff. That's the great thing about writing fic. You can do whatever the hell you want.
> 
> And Anya. At first I had considered sticking with canon and having her long dead in this fic, but then I decided that I can't do that. Next to Clarke and Lexa, she's probably my favorite, and I have always loved her and Raven together. I don't know if she will ever not be in one of my fics. As for her surviving being shot, I had considered about ten other scenarios for her reappearance, but Abby saving her in this made sense. Abby is going to be pretty amazing in this. I feel I still need to make up for making her such a horrible person in my first multi-chapter fic. Because she was so evil in that one, she will be nothing but a breath of fresh air in this one. 
> 
> Anyhow, I would love to hear your thoughts on this chapter. Thank you for reading.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you know that you are all the best? Thank you for the comments and kudos.
> 
> I hope everyone is gearing up for the holiday season. One would think that things would be calmer this year, but it's just as crazy as usual.

Chapter 3

Clarke had been in and out of sleep for the past few hours, but her need to get up and use a bathroom was what finally brought her to full wakefulness. Before she began to struggle to get out of bed, she reached out to make sure Lexa was still there and okay.

The alpha grunted as she labored to get her legs to the edge of the bed.

“Let me help you branwoda (fool/idiot).” Anya stood from a chair that was on Lexa’s side of the bed.

Clarke took in the sight of the tall slender alpha, unable to process that fact that the woman was still alive. Anya was wearing what could only have been a pair of Bellamy’s pants and an oversized, threadbare band t-shirt. She wondered how the hell the other alpha got her hands on those. Despite the clothing, the woman still looked all grounder.

“You should be resting Anya. It’s late.” Clarke reached for the offered arm Anya gave her and pulled herself up with an undignified grunt.

“I am Heda’s General, and right now none of her guards are here to protect her, so the job falls to me. It is an honor to watch over her.” Anya looked down at her charge fondly.

Clarke didn’t say anything. She was too busy being dizzy from having sat up too fast. “Breathe in deep Mountain Slayer. It will help you get your bearings.” Anya thumped her on the back practically toppling her from her precarious perch at the bedside.

The movement caused Clarke to groan. The stitches in her left side pulled, and her right arm had seized up. It was stiff. She cradled it to her front as she went to stand. Anya was surprisingly gentle this time as she helped the younger alpha get to her feet.

The blonde swayed, trying to get her balance. She was dizzy again but knew it would pass in a few seconds. She stood still until it did. When it was safe to move her head, she took a good look at Lexa and the monitors attached to the omega.

After assuring herself that Lexa was okay, Clarke hobbled over to the tiny medical bathroom happy that Anya didn’t have to help her. She took one last look at Lexa then shut the door. When she looked in the mirror after having finished, she was shocked at what stared back at her. 

Gone was the fresh-faced innocent girl that first landed on Earth. Before her stood a woman who had seen too much and been forced to commit atrocities in order to save her people. Gazing at her pale form, she reached up and touched one of the scars on her face. She couldn’t even remember how it had gotten there. 

Taking a better look, she could see twigs and leaves trapped in her matted hair. There was dirt on her face and under her fingernails, and she was certain that even though she couldn’t smell it, she stank. She was in desperate need of a bath. She would have to make do with washing her hands and face for now knowing that Abby would help her later if she needed it.

Now it was time to wake Lexa as she had promised. Clarke felt a burning need in her chest to know what had happened to her mate and how Polis had fallen into the hands of someone else. She couldn’t fathom how that had happened. 

Lexa had walked away with a victory. She had rescued her people from the Mountain, something no other Commander had been able to do. What had gone so terribly wrong that had Lexa almost dying in the forest instead of leading her people from the safety of Polis? More importantly, how had that person, this Ontari, been able to steal the Commander’s pup?

Clarke stared at her image again for a minute. “You’re a mother,” she whispered to herself. For almost the entire duration of her self-isolation, the alpha had had inexplicable aches and pains. Toward the end, those pains had grown, and now she understood why. She knew that through her bond with her mate, she was feeling Lexa’s pregnancy pains and then what could only have been the traumatic birth of their baby girl.

Clarke’s gaze hardened and she growled as she looked at her reflection. “I am going to get her back. We are going to get her back, and I am going to personally destroy those involved in hurting my mate. If my pup has been hurt, I will raze the place to the ground.”

There was a knock at the bathroom door. Clarke jumped, pulling at the stitches in her side.

“If you are done talking to yourself, you should come out.” This voice belonged to Raven. 

Clarke was frowning when she walked out of the tiny room. She felt better, minimally, having been able to clean her face and hands, but she wasn’t pleased with everything that had been going on during her extended absence. She felt guilty knowing that some of that may have been her fault. She looked around and saw her mother hanging a bag of IV fluids.

“Get back in bed, Clarke,” her mother commanded, obviously none too pleased that Clarke was already up. “This bag is for you.”

Abby followed Clarke’s gaze as she took in the medicines on the table at the bedside. There was a small cup filled with pills, two large bags of fluids, and a smaller one that Clarke thought was antibiotics.

“The pills are for you too. Everything else is for the Commander,” Abby said as she guided Clarke back into the bed. She hooked up the fluids to the IV in Clarke’s arm and handed her the cup of pills. “Take both of them.”

Abby then moved over to Lexa. She attached the bag of antibiotics to Lexa’s IV and used the same IV port to inject something into the line.

Clarke growled. “What did you just give her?” she rasped, not being able to help herself.

“Pain medicine.” Abby placed the used syringe on the table. “Against my advice, Anya said it is time to wake her up. I want her to be as comfortable as we can make her. I just need to check her wound, and then you can wake her up.”

The doctor lifted the gown covering Clarke’s mate, and the blonde couldn’t hold in the whimper that escaped when her mother undressed the wound. She was thankful that there was no longer any odor and that the wound had already improved tremendously, but it still tore at Clarke’s heart to see her mate wounded like she was.

Her gaze flicked up to Anya’s. The General didn’t seem any more pleased than Clarke did at seeing the wound. 

“Do you know who did this to her?” Clarke’s voice was dark and threatening.

Anya stole her gaze away from Lexa’s wound to look at Clarke. “I was told it was Nyko. He was the healer assigned to Lexa all throughout her pregnancy. When she went into labor, she had difficulty. He had no choice but to operate.”

Clarke was growling. She looked back at the wound. “I know he could have done a better job than this,” she accused.

Anya shook her head sadly. “I don’t know many of the details of what happened, but Lexa was being held prisoner. After the fall of the Mountain, she was celebrated, but when it became apparent that she had returned mated but without her mate, the Fleimkepas (Flamekeepers) started to say she was unworthy of the flame. When they found out she was pregnant, there was a coup, and they locked her up. They couldn’t kill her because of the pup, and they couldn’t remove the flame because of what might have happened to the baby, so they held her with the intention of taking the pup, who will be a Natblida (Nightblood), and then taking out the flame.”

Clarke was breathing hard. Her mate had been a prisoner for months while she selfishly hid away in the woods. “Does she still have whatever this flame thing is?”

Anya nodded. “She does. It would have killed her for it to be removed.” Anya was pacing. This was information she had only just recently found out herself and had been beating herself up over it ever since. “Nyko had been commanded to ensure the healthy birth of the pup by any means necessary, and then he was supposed to remove the flame. Instead, he did everything he could for Heda in the little bit of time he had. He was also the one who helped her escape Polis.”

“Where is he now?” Clarke asked. 

“Dead.” Anya stopped moving. “Once he safely got Lexa out of the city, he used himself as a distraction. He ran in the opposite direction of Heda, leaving an obvious trail so that Ontari’s men would follow him and not her. I was told he was caught and killed just as he was about to escape into the Glowing Forest.”

Anya hung her head. “He sacrificed himself to save our Commander.”

A single tear escaped Clarke’s eye. She had only met the man twice, but even back then, she could see the adoration he had for his Commander. At least now she knew why Lexa’s incision had been so poorly stitched. It hadn’t been out of malice. It had been because of a lack of time. Without Nyko’s sacrifice, her mate would be dead now.

“He was your friend,” Clarke said as she watched Anya try and control her emotions.

“He was my brother,” was her reply, and the General’s face crumpled.

As if sensing her anguish, Raven came busting back into the room. One look at her mate had her running to her and crushing her in a hug. She looked at Clarke accusingly. “What did you say to her?”

Clarke’s eyes got big. She had never seen the fun-loving omega like this, and her lips ticked up into a smile further aggravating her friend.

“Calm down, Raven,” Abby said. “They were discussing Nyko.”

“Oh,” Raven looked at Anya. “Babe, I’m sorry.” She hugged her alpha closer.

“His was an honorable death,” was all Anya said.

Clarke’s smile grew even as she was sad for the healer and his sister. The love between Anya and Raven was obvious, and it made Clarke happy to see her friend like this. After what happened with Finn, she thought that Raven was going to stay angry forever. Her hatred for Lexa and the grounders had grown after his death, even though in the end it was Clarke who had killed the beta boy. To see that Raven had been able to let go of her anger and find love and a mate in the end brought a slight lightening to her heart. 

Abby finished dressing Lexa’s wound. “The Commander should wake up on her own in a few minutes.”

Clarke’s face fell when she thought of Lexa running through the woods to get to her, especially considering the nature of her injury and the fact that their pup had been stollen from her. The blonde always knew her mate was strong, but Lexa’s feat, to have made it almost all the way to her through the forest on her own, seemed almost superhuman.

Clarke waited impatiently as she waited for Lexa to wake up. She wanted to see her green eyes. Instead, she looked at the two mates who were still hugging.

“Didn’t you know that Lexa was being held captive?” Clarke asked Anya.

“Not until just the other day. After being shot, my recovery was a long one.” She looked ashamed at that fact. “It took longer than I liked to regain my strength. After I did, I admit that I did not go to Polis to seek out my Commander. I had failed her when you burned 300 of my men. I could not return to her in disgrace.”

“And by that time,” Raven interrupted, “we were mated, and she had been fully accepted by our people.” The dark-haired woman nudged her mate. “It wasn’t an easy transition for her, but she’s just as much Skaikru as she is Trikru now. There was no need for her to return to the Capitol and potentially be punished for what had happened at the dropship.”

“Lexa wouldn’t have done that. She wouldn’t have punished you.” Clarke protested. “She mourned you when I told her you were dead.”

Copper eyes stared holes in Clarke. “That may be, but our society is very different from yours. We pride ourselves on our strength, and we punish weakness. It’s why the Order of the Flame turned on Lexa. Not only did she mate with someone they considered the enemy despite the alliance, she also showed back up without her mate. They would have seen this as a weakness.”

Anya let go of Raven and started to pace. “Someone who cannot hold onto their mate is always seen as weak. The mating bond is sacred and for life. The only acceptable severance of a mating bond is one brought on by death. Since the Order knew you were alive, it meant that Lexa had failed to keep you, making her weak in their eyes. Even the Commander is not immune to the ‘laws’ of our society.”

“That’s barbaric,” Clarke exclaimed. “She had just done what no other Commander had ever been able to do yet she was still punished? No matter what she did to me and my people that day, she still showed great strength by accepting Emerson’s deal. If she hadn’t, those in the Mountain would have died, and many of the warriors at her back would have died along with them. Didn’t they understand that?”

“It doesn’t matter. The Order has a rigid set of standards for the people, and especially the Commander. Heda took a great risk that day, and it didn’t go her way.”

Clarke was growling again, and she wanted to lay waste to everyone involved in the terrible treatment of her mate. Whoever Ontari and the man Titus were, she was going to have a reckoning with them, and when she was done with them there would be nothing recognizable.

Lexa started to shift uncomfortably next to Clarke. “Sweetheart, you need to tone down the pheromones,” Abby stated. “You are making the Commander uncomfortable.”

The blonde’s eyes flashed over to her mate, and she immediately regretted her anger. She had unintentionally distressed her mate. Looking up, she saw that Raven had not been immune either.

She ducked her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“Niron (loved one/lover).” Lexa’s eyes fluttered open. She looked terrible but still so much better than the last time her eyes were open.

“Lexa,” Clarke’s lips found the omega’s temple. “How do you feel?”

“Hurts,” was her one-word answer.

Before Clarke could say anything, Abby was already shaking her head. “I can’t give her anything else, Clarke. Her blood pressure is already too low.” 

Clarke looked up at the monitors, and her mother was correct. Lexa’s blood pressure was low; not dangerously so, but low enough that more pain medicine would make it worse.

“It’s okay, Klark.”

“It’s not,” the alpha protested. “Nothing that has happened to you is alright.”

“You know then?” Lexa whispered. Too weak to speak louder.

“I know enough,” Clarke started sliding herself toward her mate, even as Abby protested. She was mindful of the IV line attached to her, but she wasn’t going to stop moving until she was engulfing her mate. “and I am so, so sorry that I wasn’t there for you.”

“Don’t apologize,” Lexa said weakly. “I made the decisions I made that day knowing what could happen.”

“It still doesn’t make it right.” It was Anya who spoke up. 

Lexa’s eyes practically glowed with happiness at seeing her friend again. “I still can’t believe you are alive.”

“Me neither,” Clarke and Anya said at the same time making the older alpha chuckle.

“I think I overheard that I have Abby kom Skaikru to thank for that.” Leave it to the omega to be listening and taking in details even when she was seemingly unconscious. Lexa looked around the room until she spotted the doctor. “Thank you for saving my seda (teacher/mentor) …and for saving me.”

In a show of warmth and compassion that was so like Clarke’s mother, Abby walked over and placed her hand on the omega’s cheek. “It was my honor to save both of you. Skaikru may have had its differences with you in the beginning, but I know now that you are honorable, loyal, and caring. What you did at the Mountain that day angered me until I realized exactly what you did for your people, and I recognized that it is exactly what I would have done as well. You saved a lot of lives that day, but you were punished for it. That isn’t right.” Abby then plucked a sweaty piece of hair from Lexa’s forehead. “All you need to know now is that you are safe, and except for Polis and Azgeda, the Coalition still stands with you as does Arkadia, and when the time is right, we are all ready to help you take back the Capitol and free your pup.”

Lexa’s eyes started to glisten. “And, I never thought I would be saying this,” Abby continued, “but I am honored to be your mother-in-law.”

Lexa tilted her head, confused by the phrase while Anya’s face split into a huge smile. “It means she’s as much your mother now as she is Clarke’s.”

The tears finally overflowed the lids of Lexa’s eyes, but they were tears of happiness. “I have never had a nomon before.” The words were so soft they were barely audible.

Abby leaned in and kissed the omega on her forehead. “Well, you have one now.”

Lexa smiled weakly. “I would like that Abby kom Skaikru, very much.”

Abby chuckled. “Just Abby, Commander.”

“Not the Commander.” Lexa’s voice was flat with acceptance.

“Yes, you are,” said Abby, Raven, and Anya all at the same time.

“Even if you don’t believe that because of what has happened, even you have to accept that you are because you still have the Flame. Only the Commander can carry the flame.” Anya said with authority.

Clarke was still confused because she didn’t know what the Flame was. After griping about her lack of knowledge, Anya finally filled her in, and the blonde couldn’t help but weave her hand through the hair at the back of Lexa’s head until she felt the thin line of a scar.

She didn’t withdraw her hand, even though her shoulder was at an odd angle, because the touch felt right. She felt a small tingling in the tips of her fingers as she traced the scar, and she didn’t know if it was because of her connection with her mate, or because of the Flame.

“So, you can hear the voices of the past Commanders in your head?” Clarke asked as she reluctantly removed her hand, only to replace it carefully on Lexa’s belly.

“Sha (yes), Klark.”

Clarke made a show of smiling down at her mate. “Well, I may not fully understand this Flame business, but if you can still hear the past Commanders then doesn’t that prove that you are still worthy of their attention, and that you are still Heda? It seems to me, if they agreed with the Order, they would have abandoned you by now.”

Lexa blinked a few times and almost seemed to settle. “Perhaps you are correct, Klark.”

Abby unhooked the IV line attached to Heda and abruptly changed the subject; the doctor in her coming out. “I want you to try and drink something now. I don’t think you are ready for solid foods yet, but you need to start getting in some calories. You’ve already lost too much weight.”

Lexa looked a little green at the thought, but she agreed to try some broth. Abby left to go and get it, and Clarke didn’t bother to tell her mate that the broth would be fortified with proteins and other things that would help her get better faster. It was a terrible brew, but she knew her mate would drink it.

When Abby returned with two mugs of the stuff, Clarke growled at her mother, knowing her mom was going to make her drink one of them too.

Before Clarke could protest, Abby said, “You drink it, or you get a feeding tube shoved down your nose. It’s your decision.”

Clarke sighed and held out her left hand. Lexa didn’t protest at all when Anya helped her hold her own mug with shaky hands. With the General’s help, she sipped at the broth.

Clarke took her first sip and grimaced. Lexa, on the other hand, seemed almost delighted. “It’s good. Thank you, Abby.”

“Not good. Gross.” Clarke couldn’t hide her disgust.

When Lexa finished the broth, she looked at Abby. “How long will it take me to recover?” She asked casually, but Clarke could feel an underlying sorrow layered in her voice. “I want to get my pup back as soon as possible.” She brought a hand to her stomach. “I need her, Abby.” Her face distorted, but she held back her tears. “I didn’t even get to hold her.”

Clarke’s mug was out of her hands and on the table in an instant and she was pulling Lexa to her. Soothing pheromones filled the air. Everyone in the room did their best to calm the upset mother. 

“We are going to get our child back, Lexa. I promise you, and when we do, you will never have to let her go again.”

“Yes, we are going to get her back,” Lexa said, a new resolve in her voice. It gave Clarke hope that her mate was starting to sound like the Commander she knew her to be. “Abby, I need an estimate of my recovery time. I need to start meeting with the ambassadors and leaders from the other clans. Anya, I want you to send for Indra. I need to know what’s going on, and from the snippets I have heard, you don’t have all the knowledge I need.”

Anya bowed her head respectfully and left to do Heda’s bidding. Clarke watched the general go, thinking that the alpha would be offended by Lexa’s last statement, but what her mate said was the truth. They all knew it, even if Clarke felt like she was still missing so many pieces. As Anya walked away, Clarke couldn’t help but notice that Anya actually seemed to have a new bounce in her step and figured it probably felt good to have a purpose again. 

Anya had been in Arkadia for longer than Clarke was on her own in the woods. She was more a resident than Clarke, and the younger alpha figured that it must have been hard for Anya to be idle for so long after having come from such a high position in Heda’s army. None but Lexa was above Anya. The look on Anya’s face was one that told of the joy it was to have a purpose again, even if it was only to run a simple errand for the Commander.

It was late in the evening and Lexa had exhausted herself arguing with Abby that she could not wait three whole months to allow herself to recover. As Lexa began to fatigue while wildly gesticulating with her arms and arguing with Abby, Clarke’s mother finally cut the Commander off.

“This is exactly why you need to rest and do as I say. Look at you,” Abby waved her arm at her daughter-in-law. “You can barely lift your arms anymore, and the only thing you have done today is argue with me.” Abby’s tone softened. “Lexa, you have been underfed during the entire duration of your pregnancy. It is no wonder you required surgery to remove the pup. Under any circumstance like that the recovery period would be extended, but on top of that, you trekked across Trikru lands causing further injury to yourself and catching an infection that nearly killed you. I will do my best to speed your healing, but you are not stepping foot outside of Arkadia, and you are not meeting with representatives from the other clans until I deem you ready. Is that understood?”

Lexa’s eyes grew wide at Abby’s imposing authority. It had been many years since someone had spoken to her that way, and her first instinct was to get angry and fight back, but her calm head prevailed and she accepted, albeit reluctantly, that the doctor was in charge so long as Lexa required medical attention.

Eventually she sank into the pillow at her head knowing that she had lost this battle. “Would it be okay if I had some more of that broth?” She asked it almost shyly.

Abby grinned. “Absolutely.” The healer’s eyes narrowed in on Clarke. “You will be drinking some more too, and after that I want you to try and walk some. Lexa, you can try and sit on the edge of the bed if you are feeling up to it, but it is not necessary for you to try today.”

When her mother walked out, Clarke and Lexa were alone. “How are you really?” Clarke nuzzled her face into Lexa’s neck, finding the mating mark there. Lexa gasped at the sensation.

“Better now that you are with me,” Lexa broke down and started to cry, “but I won’t be whole until we get our baby girl back.” She put her hand over her heart. “It hurts, Klark.”

“I know. I feel it too, and the entire time I was gone, I could feel your pain. I didn’t know what I was feeling at the time, but now I know, and I am so sorry that I couldn’t be with you, that there was no way for me to help you.” Clarke’s voice hitched. 

Lexa whipped her head around so that she could look Clarke squarely in the eyes. “No fault lies with you, niron. It all lies with me, and I will accept my fate, even if that means stepping down from my position as Heda, but I will not stop fighting until we have our pup back.”

Clarke squeezed Lexa’s hand. “Neither will I, my love.”

Both mates dozed as they waited for Abby to return with their broth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, what did you think? We learned more about what Lexa went through, and we also learned that Abby is pretty great. Oh, and poor Nyko. He's a hero for sure.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas/Holiday. How wonderful was it to wake up this morning knowing it was still the weekend?

Chapter 4

“Did you give her a name?” Clarke asked tentatively, not wanting to upset her omega. It had been two days, and Lexa had finally been allowed out of bed. She had even started taking in simple solid foods. 

Green eyes shone bright for maybe the first time since Clarke sprinted to get Lexa to Arkadia as quickly as possible lest she die in the woods. “I had a lot of time to contemplate what her name would be, but I wanted to wait for you.”

Clarke was undeniably touched by this. “I hope you know that I had no intentions of hiding the pregnancy from you, Klark. If things…if things hadn’t happened the way that they had, I would have sent my men out to search for you.”

“You knew I left?” Clarke wondered how she knew.

“I did. I had scouts stay behind to watch the Mountain.” Lexa splinted her belly with her forearm as she coughed. “I need you to know that it was never my intention to leave you that day, but Emerson…”

“Lex, you don’t have to explain. I know, and I understand, why you did what you did. Just like my mother said. Faced with the same decision, I would have done the same thing.”

Lexa didn’t look appeased. “That may be, but I hurt you. I know I did. I could feel it, and when the scouts came back and told me you left, I wanted desperately to search for you myself, but I couldn’t leave my people. There were too many sick and wounded men and women in the group of rescued people. There were even children.” Lexa looked down at their entwined hands. “After that, you mostly know what happened.”

Clarke did know more. Over the course of the last two days, Lexa parceled out details about her pregnancy and her imprisonment. Ontari was a decidedly cruel woman, and it was only Nyko and Titus’s interference that kept the alpha from killing Lexa outright. The Nightblood from Azgeda was powerful, and it had angered her greatly that she had not been able to force Lexa to submit when she had first stormed into the Tower. She had threatened violence, and even went to hit Lexa, but Heda was not some meek little omega like the ones in the Ice Nation who were forced to bow before every alpha that crossed their path. Ontari, and Nia before her, had done a huge amount of damage to omega rights, and it was only Heda and the Coalition that kept Azgeda from essentially enslaving their omega population.

When Ontari had lifted her hand to strike out at Lexa, the Commander had easily taken her down bare-handed. Even as a powerful alpha, Ontari was no match for Lexa, but the Order of the Flame was. 

Lexa had been under their care and influence since the time she was a small pup. The only parental figure she had ever had in her life was Titus, and until he had found out that he was pregnant with a pup from one of the “invaders,” she had thought him loyal to her. She had even thought that perhaps he had loved her like a daughter, but she had been wrong, and that had devastated her. Now it enraged her that Titus was one of the people caring for the little girl who she was yet to hold. She was going to enjoy gutting the man when she finally returned to Polis. The only saving grace was that she knew her child would be well taken care of. All Nightbloods were. They were sacred…until they became a disgrace in the eyes of the Order like Lexa had. She knew her child was safe, and that was the only thing holding her back from storming Polis and taking her child back by force before she was ready.

Indra had arrived yesterday, and the beta woman had been so relieved to see her Commander that first she had carefully hugged her Heda, and then she dropped to her knees to swear her and all of Trikru’s fealty to her. 

The normally stoic woman had broken out in a smile that lasted for over five minutes. It was such a rare occurrence that an amused Anya had teased her about it mercilessly. The Wormana (war chief) didn’t care, she had her Heda back. 

It was no different with the others. Gustus, Tristan, and Ryder had all accompanied Indra, and Skaikru welcomed the newcomers with open arms. That wasn’t too surprising. That Indra and the others had all taken one look at Clarke and bowed deeply to her, even exposing their necks, was. It was no secret that Indra and Gustus had not been fond of Clarke prior to the battle at the Mountain.

“Wanheda,” they had called her, and when the blonde had demanded to know what that meant, Anya quietly explained that it meant Commander of Death.

Clarke had frowned when she heard this, and looked accusingly at Raven, Anya, and her mother. “Did you know they were calling me that?”

They all looked sheepish but confirmed that they knew. They expected that Clarke would detest the name and that it might have her fleeing back to the forest. Her reactions shocked all of them. 

“Does this Ontari person believe the same thing?” Clarke had asked, oddly calm.

“She does. She has sent her people to the forest to capture you so that she could kill you and take your power,” Indra provided. “You were lucky never to have been found.”

Clarke’s sneer turned into a wicked smile as she wrapped her mind around what that meant. “She fears me,” Clarke said with confidence.

“She does,” Indra confirmed. “They all do. The power of Wanheda is only matched by that of Heda, and when the two get together, they are thought to be unstoppable, especially when mated.”

Clarke’s smile grew, as did Lexa’s. If they thought her to be this Wanheda person, then she would be. She would bring death to those who had hurt her mate and taken her pup. Her mate may still be down for the count, but already the omega had made tremendous strides in improving her health. She was walking almost the entire compound, and her wound was healing at a rate not ever seen by those on the Ark. Together, they would storm Polis and take back what was rightfully theirs.

Abby’s people attributed Lexa’s progress to the healing properties they found in Lexa’s black blood. The three-month timeline that Clarke’s mother had originally set for Lexa had been decreased first to two and a half months, and then to two. The doctor admitted that if the Commander kept healing as quickly as she was that the timeline might get revised again. She had even agreed to allow Lexa to meet with her ambassadors within the next week, but only one or two at a time, and for only one hour maximum per visit.

Lexa had been overjoyed by this. She wasn’t used to taking commands or having a schedule set for her, but the first time she got out of bed, nearly doubling over in pain and vomiting into a bucket that Clarke quickly shoved under her to keep it from splashing on the floor, she admitted to herself that she needed to heed the doctor. Lexa could be prideful, but she was not stupid, and if she and her mate were going to get their pup back, then she needed to be healthy, and that wasn’t going to happen if she pushed things too quickly or didn’t listen to Abby.

Having her people around her also seemed to help speed Lexa’s healing. Her spirits had risen tremendously, especially having Gustus and Anya back at her side. She may have been their Commander, but they were also her family. Anya had been Lexa’s seda since the time she was a small pup; Anya just barely being in her teens at the time. Gustus had always been her bodyguard. Having them near to provide council, to protect her, and to gently tease her had her mood lifting each day.

It was Clarke’s presence, however, that brought her the most comfort. She had been terrified of Clarke’s rejection when she set out to find her alpha. The pain she knew she had caused Clarke had been great, and just like Clarke had felt her pain, she had felt Clarke’s. What she had done at Mount Weather had been unforgivable, but Clarke had found it in her heart to absolve Lexa of the wrong she had done that day, and it wasn’t something she had ever expected. When Nyko had helped her escape to go find her mate, the omega never once thought that the alpha would forgive her; it wasn’t what she was expecting. She was, however, expecting that Clarke would find a way to get their pup back. She believed that even if she died in her efforts to find her mate that everything would be okay so long as her mate knew about the pup. She knew that Clarke would be able to get their pup back, even if it meant siding with Ontari. In her fevered frenzy to get to her mate, she didn’t even care about what Clarke might have to do to get their daughter back. She just needed Clarke to get their daughter, and she had been willing to give up her life to get to her mate and let her know that she had sired a pup.

Now though, Lexa was getting better and together Heda and Wanheda would destroy those who had stolen from her, and they would return order and peace to their world.

Another three days went by, and Clarke suddenly had her own seda (teacher). Anya had been commanded by Heda to start training her mate. Clarke needed to be more combat ready. The blonde may be proficient in wielding a gun, but she had poor fighting skills and no skills when it came to using a knife or a sword. 

Abby had cautioned that Clarke was not ready. The blonde alpha was not healing at nearly the rate her mate was, and the doctor worried that Clarke would hurt herself further if she trained with the other alpha. 

Anya and Lexa both assured Abby that Clarke would not be pushed to do anything that her body couldn’t handle. The first week would mostly be exercises in flexibility, stance, and focus. 

Clarke was outside dripping with sweat as Anya was teaching her a defensive position when Bellamy walked up to them. It was the first time Clarke had seen him since she had gotten back. It had hurt when Octavia told her that he was avoiding her, but she understood that he was angry that she had run away right after the events at Mount Weather. Octavia told her that he felt like she had abandoned him, which she had, and he was having a hard time forgiving that, but when he walked up to her, his hard eyes softened. He took in the bedraggled state of his friend, and instead of yelling at her like he had intended, he swept in to embrace her.

“I missed you, Princess.” He gave her a wide smile that she wasn’t expecting, and she returned it. He gave Anya a respectful nod then embraced the older alpha’s forearm in the typical grounder greeting. Clarke looked between the two of them and was surprised to find that they seemed to have a mutual respect for one another, and maybe even a friendship.

“I won’t keep you two from what you are doing,” he said, “but when you are finished, I would love to catch up with you Clarke. We have a lot to talk about.” He didn’t interrupt them further and walked away.

Once he was out of earshot, Clarke looked at her seda. “You two are friends?”

Anya smiled and watched as he walked away. “He may be gruff and impulsive, but that young man has a lot of courage. What he did in the Mountain to save your people and ours is to be respected.” Clarke was surprised by her words. “We may have had our differences at first, but we have come to an understanding, and yes, he has become a friend. A lot of your young delinquents have become my friends.”

Anya looked over to where several were sitting. Murphy looked up and gave the General a smile. Monty and Harper both waved. It was only Jasper who ignored them. 

It didn’t take a genius to figure out what was wrong with the beta boy. Jasper had lost the girl he loved in the Mountain, and Clarke knew that she wouldn’t be forgiven for the role she played in Maya’s death. It rankled her some. Bellamy was greeted warmly by Jasper when he got over to him. Why was it that Bellamy, who had pulled the lever with her to irradiate the Mountain, had been forgiven, but she was not?

She had thought that she and Jasper were friends, and she knew that what happened at the Mountain was terrible, but was it fair to forgive one person, and not the other? Even Raven forgave and understood what she had done when she’d had to kill Finn.

Clarke shook her head away from those thoughts. She had been away for a long time, and except for Jasper, everyone had been excited that she was back. She supposed that was better than she deserved.

She was about to get back into position when she caught Lexa’s form out of the corner of her eye. Her mate had gotten strong enough that she was able to walk the entire perimeter of the compound now, and she was being released from the medical ward later that day. She and Clarke would be moving to a small but private room for them to share. Clarke could have moved there already, but she refused to be without her mate at night.

The blonde couldn’t help but stare. Lexa was still underweight, and she might still have dark circles under her eyes, but Clarke still thought her the most radiant creature to grace the face of the Earth. She may have been walking slowly, but Lexa still moved with feline grace and it had the alpha completely enthralled. When Lexa smiled at her, her heart thumped in her chest. 

They had gotten off to a rough start as mates, but they were slowly rectifying that. It was currently hard for either of them to be apart. It was even harder for them not to be touching in one form or another, and they were both looking forward to being able to sleep in private that night. By no means were either of them healthy enough to be intimate in the way they wanted to be, but they needed the time alone to strengthen the bond they had barely begun to form when the devastation of Mount Weather had happened.

Lexa’s cadence was slow and guarded, but she made steady progress toward them. She smiled warmly when she got close. Her first meeting with one of the clan leaders was going to be in the morning, and it had the omega excited. She was ready to address her people and get back to business. She had been forced to be idle for too long, first while imprisoned, and then for almost the past week while she healed. She could no longer sit by and do nothing. It was not in her nature to do so.

“I’m sorry to interrupt your training session, Anya, but I would like some time alone with my mate. I fear once my meetings start tomorrow, I won’t have the time I would like to spend with Clarke.” She gave the blonde a look filled with longing. “I would also like to discuss names for our pup. I think there is one that we will both like.

There first discussion about names had gotten interrupted, but now Lexa was determined that their daughter should have a proper name. 

Anya dipped her head to her Heda. “Of course, Commander.” She looked at Clarke. “Don’t think that by cutting our session short today that you are getting out of anything. I will be tacking today’s lost time onto tomorrow’s session…and I better be the first to find out the name.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Of course, Seda.”

Clarke walked Lexa to their new room. It was sparsely decorated. Abby had moved the few possessions Clarke still had into the room, but it hadn’t amounted to much. It was almost embarrassing. There were a few books on the small table along with a few pencils and a couple of sheets of paper. On the bed was the family quilt. The alpha’s eyes watered at seeing it. It had been given to Abby by her mate’s mother upon her mating with Jake Griffin, and now Abby had given it to Lexa. It was the only family heirloom that had made it up into space with the Griffin family. The thing was ancient, but it still looked as if it were brand-new. It had been treated with care, and Clarke would make sure to take care of it so she and Lexa could pass it on to their daughter one day.

Lexa inspected the bed cover. It was full of rich blues, greens, reds, and golds. There were patterns on it that told the story of the Griffin family, and Clarke vowed to tell the story to Lexa one day, but at that moment, she had no words.

She was overwhelmed by her mother’s gesture, but she was even more overwhelmed to finally have her mate to herself, with no worries of prying eyes seeing them. Not that anyone had been disrespectful. The blonde was simply longing for alone time with her mate.

As soon as the door clicked shut behind them, Clarke had Lexa in her arms. Before she knew it, she had her face tucked against the omega’s neck, and she started to purr. She smiled into her mating mark when she heard Lexa start to purr as well. 

“I never thought I was going to have this with you,” Lexa confessed. “Every day in my prison, I thought of you. I thought about what it would be like to watch you playing with our pup, and I knew that you would be an amazing mother. I spent hours talking to our pup and telling her about you and how wonderful you are.”

Clarke was speechless and had to swallow a lump in throat. “Did you know that she would be a girl?”

Lexa chuckled. “I did. I don’t know how, but I always felt like we were going to have a daughter.”

“You said you have thought of a name.” Clarke said.

“I did think of one. I hope you like it. I think I would like to name her Dolley or Madison. We could call her Madi for short.”

Clarke lifted her head from her mate’s shoulder and smiled broadly. “After Dolley Madison. You remember that conversation.”

“Of course, I do.” Lexa led them to the bed so that they could sit down. Being on her feet still fatigued her. “She was a remarkable woman who was one of the first omegas to make a splash in the political world of old. She was the mate of James Madison, and I remember how you told me that she was one of the first people to bring both sides of the political spectrum together.” Lexa grew excited, her usual response when discussing politics. “She was a huge proponent for omega rights, and because of her advocacy, omegas gained the right to run for Congress and even President. She brought equal representation to all aspects of leadership, and that is what I hope for our daughter. I hope that she will be strong like that. I want her to be able to advocate for those less fortunate than her, and more than that, I want her to be loved and respected.” She spouted the facts almost exactly as Clarke had given them to her.

Clarke hugged Lexa close to her again. “I want that for her too, but first we have to get her back, and I promise that we will. We will get our little Madi, and then we will give her the world.”

“Madison Griffin,” Lexa whispered, trying the name out on her tongue.

“No, Madison Griffin kom Trikru,” Clarke corrected with a smile. “She is a part of both of us, and her name will reflect that.”

“Ai hod yu in, Clarke Griffin.”

“And I love you, Heda Lexa kom Trikru.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who got presents, what was the best thing you got? The best thing I got earlier this month was the Covid vaccine. I am tier 1 medical worker and feel very fortunate to have been able to get the first part of the vaccine already. My two favorite things from yesterday were related to The 100. I got a necklace that had the symbols of the 12 clans on it, and a t-shirt with Lexa's back tattoo. I have been itching to get that tattoo, but a certain someone in my life would probably kill me. It's unique enough that even years from now, if my obsession with Clexa ever ends, I think I would still love it, but it's a lifelong commitment so it's going to take more thought. 
> 
> As always, thank you for the kudos and comments.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is anyone jumping for joy that 2020 is over? I am not under the impression that 2021 will be any better, at least not at first, but I have to have hope that things will improve. We all deserve something a little better than what we got in 2020. 
> 
> Happy New Year to everyone who is already there, and have a wonderful New Year's Eve to everyone else who hasn't gotten there yet. Be safe and don't drink too much champagne. 🥂🍾

Chapter 5

Two weeks had gone by, and Lexa’s rate of healing was nothing but remarkable. Abby once again had to revise her estimate of when the Commander would be ready to return to her full duties, and she though that perhaps in two to three more weeks, Lexa would be able to rally the troops and storm Polis.

Over the past couple of weeks, Abby and Lexa had become quite close. Clarke’s mother enjoyed doting on her daughter-in-law. Lexa allowed it in a way that Clarke never had. Her daughter had always run to her father when she had needed snuggles, or help with homework, or really just about anything. Abby hadn’t minded. It was the way it was with parents. There was a certain bond that omegas had with alphas that worked both ways. Omega children tended to drift toward their alpha parent while alpha children went towards their omega parent. On the Ark, it had been the natural way of things.

That Lexa had never really had a mother figure in her life had bothered Abby immensely, and she tried to make up for this by bathing Lexa with the attention she never got as a small pup.

At first, the Commander in Lexa had tried to rebuff the attention. The affection and care were so foreign to the omega that she hadn’t known how to react to it. It was Clarke that encouraged her to allow Abby her mothering, and it wasn’t long before the blonde could see that inwardly Lexa was reveling in the attention. 

The doctor, who of course made Lexa’s (and Clarke’s) health a priority had taken to fattening up the scrawny omega. She had hunting parties going out every day to provide for the Commander. Lexa was not a picky eater, but when Abby found out that rabbit was her favorite, she made sure that the omega had a least some form of rabbit to eat with each of her meals. Fortunately, the creatures were plentiful around Arkadia. Unfortunately, Lexa had never been a big eater, and Abby had to force her to eat sometimes.

Each night, Abby had an herbal tea and a sweet treat waiting at the bedside for the omega. Abby didn’t know it, but Lexa always shared her treat with Clarke. The young alpha had tried to protest and make her omega eat the treats herself, but Lexa refused unless Clarke partook of the sweet goodness with her. Knowing how hard Abby must have worked to procure the rare items, it made her heart soar to know the lengths her mother would go to for her new mate.

Unlike Lexa’s, Clarke’s rate of healing was not as quick. There was nothing wrong with her. She was recovering exactly as Abby expected, she just didn’t have nightblood to aid in her healing. With daily physical therapy, the alpha’s shoulder had regained almost all of its motion, and Abby had allowed her daughter to start weapons training with Anya so long as she didn’t have to hold a weapon in her right arm. 

That was fine with Clarke. Being left-handed, she didn’t think she would ever be good at wielding a knife or a sword with her right arm anyway. Anya had been instructed that she could teach the younger alpha how to use the arm in hand-to-hand combat as long as Clarke was careful not to overdo it.

While Lexa’s healing was fast, Clarke’s ability to use a sword was faster. Already she was having full sparring matches with Anya and some of the gonas who had arrived, and she had bested most of them at least once. 

It made her omega proud to watch her mate. Arkadia as a whole was becoming less reliant on its guns and more skilled with the weapons traditionally used by the grounders, but it was Clarke and her natural ability that encouraged almost everyone in the compound to learn to use at least a dagger. 

As it was, the guns in Arkadia were plentiful, but ammunition was not. As soon as it became clear that Lexa was healing and the timetable for attacking Polis would be moving up, Chancellor Kane had commanded that ammunition be used sparingly. It was being saved for the battle at the Capitol. 

Raven who had been tasked with trying to find a weapon that would be able to breach the walls surrounding the city, had commandeered much of the dwindling supply of ammunition.

The omega had been gleeful when given the task. “You want me to make something go boom? Consider it done.” Her attention to the task was such that Anya had to drag her mate to bed each night. Give Raven a toy to play with, and she rarely stopped. It came as no surprise that Raven was developing a rocket launcher that would be strong enough to punch through the thick stone walls of Polis.

Clarke was just finishing a sparring match with Anya when Lexa walked out of the Ark. Tomorrow, she would be meeting with some of the ambassadors again, and a new face would be joining the mix. Roan kom Azgeda had sent a messenger with a note that indicated he wanted to take up arms and join in the fight to regain Polis. He also said he had some very important information for Lexa, but he had been very cryptic about it.

He was not a man to be trusted, however. How could he be? He the Prince of Azgeda. Because of this, Lexa had made sure that her armor, leathers, pauldron, and sash had been recreated. She needed to look every part the Commander when the Prince arrived. She may still feel weak and gaunt, but when Roan arrived, she would make sure she looked robust and strong, and very intimidating.

It was what Lexa was wearing at that moment that had Clarke drooling. The alpha had never seen Lexa looking so soft. Her hair was loose and without braids, and she was wearing a light sundress to battle the heat outside the cool metal walls of Arkadia. On her feet she wore a pair of strappy sandals that showed off her slender ankles. Clarke had no idea how her mother had gotten her hands on such delicate footwear for her mate, but she couldn’t deny the effect it was having on her. 

She forgot all about her match with Anya as she stared at her mate and every drop of blood that she had zeroed in on her clit, causing it to engorge and elongate. She couldn’t take her eyes off the vision in front of her.

Anya cuffed her upside the head. “Rein it in, pup. She’s not ready for any of that.”

Clarke’s hand instantly went to her stinging ear. “Wha-I know that.” She couldn’t help the embarrassing bulge that was starting to form in her pants. The sight of Lexa in such a loose and flowing dress was mesmerizing. She had never seen her omega dressed so comfortably, so softly. before. Hospital gowns didn’t count.

Lexa continued to walk toward her mate and her seda. She had a new, healthy glow to her skin, and the sway to her hips told Clarke that she knew exactly the effect she was having on her mate. The simple ponytail she was sporting made the alpha’s lower region twitch again.

Anya rolled her eyes. There would be no more sparring that day. She clasped Clarke’s shoulder none to gently.

“I know where this is going. She is not ready. Do not lose control of yourself and accidentally hurt her.”

The thought that Clarke could hurt her omega by accident had the younger alpha faltering. Her face was burning with heat, and for a change it wasn’t because of the hot sun above them.

“I won’t.” Sincere blue eyes looked the older alpha directly in the face. “I will never hurt her Anya; this I can swear to you.”

“Then go tend to your mate. Just be careful.”

“Yes, Mom,” Clarke called over her shoulder as she walked toward her beautiful mate.

She trotted over to Lexa. It pulled at her side some to exert herself in that way, but if it meant getting to her mate faster, then it was worth it.

“Lex, you look gorgeous.” 

Lexa smoothed her hands down the length of her dress. She looked suddenly uncertain. “I’ve never worn a dress like this before.”

Clarke leaned in for a kiss. “You should wear them more often. You are stunning in that.”

“Mochof, niron (Thank you, loved one/lover).” 

Clarke smirked when she noticed a slight dusting of red on the omega’s cheeks. She enjoyed when her mate let down her defenses and showed that she was vulnerable to compliments, especially genuine ones.

She rubbed her thumb pad over her mate’s pronounced cheekbone. Lexa had always had cheekbones to die for, but they were still more prominent than they should have been. The omega had gained weight, but not nearly as much as she should have.

“Would you like to go and get lunch with me? I heard they were trying something new today in the cafeteria.” Clarke asked.

“Actually, I was hoping we could take a picnic into the woods. I’m starting to feel…I, uh…I need to get out of these walls. They are starting to close in on me.” Clarke could scent her distress.

It was another vulnerability that her omega would rarely admit to. Since her imprisonment in the dungeons of Polis, Lexa had been itching to go outside, and by outside she meant outside the walls of Arkadia. It was only her training that kept her in Arkadia for as long as she had, but now that she was healing, she could no longer remain confined. 

The alpha used her pheromones to help calm her mate, and Lexa gave her an appreciative smile. Since the ambassadors had started to arrive, Lexa had had few chances to spend time with Clarke during the day, and at night, she was often too tired to do more than talk to her alpha for a few minutes before nodding off to sleep. 

Clarke was starting to suspect that Abby was slipping something into Lexa’s nightly tea that was helping the omega fall asleep and stay asleep during the night. The alpha couldn’t fault her mother for that. It hadn’t taken long for them to figure out that Lexa’s sleep was often disturbed by nightmares. It hurt the blonde that she wasn’t able to take the pain of Lexa’s ordeals away for her. She would bear all the pain for her mate if she could.

“I would love to have a picnic with you.” Clarke gave her a toothy grin. “I’ve never actually been on one before.” Lexa looked excited at the prospect of sharing something with her alpha that she had never experienced before. 

“Tell me what I need to get so that we can go.” Clarke was eager to spend some time with Lexa.

“It’s already taken care of. Abby helped me collect what we need, and Gustus will carry it out for us.” Even while still at one of her lowest points in her life, Lexa was still three steps ahead of everyone.

“I can carry it.” The alpha in Clarke felt slightly affronted that Lexa hadn’t asked her to bring the basket for them.

Lexa sighed. “I know you can, but I want…” The omega hesitated, slightly embarrassed. “I want you to hold my hand while we walk.”

Another vulnerability. Prior to the battle at Mount Weather, Lexa as Heda radiated pure power and strength, and that meant not showing much emotion. Even during their very brief courtship, Lexa had remained somewhat reserved. It had been clear to Clarke that she was desperate for attention and touch, but as Commander, she couldn’t show that need. 

The night they mated; Lexa was like a person who had been starved of touch all her life. She’d been needy and wanting, and oh so appreciative of the attention Clarke had lavished on her, but since finding her in the woods, Lexa was more reserved again, but the alpha didn’t think it was because of her training, rather the alpha thought it was because Lexa still wasn’t sure about where she stood in Clarke’s life. No matter how often Clarke had said she loves her and forgives her, the blonde had a feeling that Lexa didn’t really believe that she had been absolved of her actions that fateful day on the Mountain.

The alpha grabbed the omega’s hand and kissed it before fully entwining their fingers. “Well, if that is why you want Gustus to carry everything, I can’t argue with that.”

Gustus led the way to a clear spot at the edge of the river. The water gently gurgled as the giant of a man carefully laid out a blanket before placing a basket of goodies for the on top of it. Indra and Anya weren’t too far behind. Ever since the return of their Commander, they had taken Lexa’s protection very seriously fearing that Ontari would send assassins to find her missing prisoner.

At least this time, they made themselves scarce. Clarke knew they were nearby, but they made themselves invisible. As soon as Gustus was done setting up the picnic for his Heda, he too disappeared, giving them some semblance of privacy.

Lexa was the first to sit. She let out a contented sigh as soon as she was no longer on her feet. She was still lacking her normal endurance and stamina, and while she had been cleared to meet with the ambassadors, she had not been cleared to begin training again. She had also longed to get on a horse, but that was still strictly forbidden.

To cope with this, she spent as much time as she could meditating on her own or with Indra or Anya’s guidance.

Clarke sat down next to her and inched over until their hips were touching. “Is this okay?” For some reason, the alpha was suddenly feeling shy at the same time as feeling like she needed to confess, except she didn’t know exactly what it was that she wanted to confess to.

Lexa leaned over and kissed her temple. “This is more than okay.” 

The subtle smoky scent of her mate wafted into Clarke’s nose, and she breathed in deeply. Her mate’s scent was absolutely intoxicating, and it started to do things to her that she couldn’t allow. To counteract the affect her mate was having on her, the alpha abruptly started to dig through the basket that had been packed for them. She was astonished by the amount and variety of food that she found. 

She arched an eyebrow. “This is all for us?”

“I think your nomon (mother) wanted to make sure that I ate enough. She’s not pleased with how little I eat.” 

Abby had fussed at Clarke numerous times that she wasn’t doing her job as Lexa’s mate with making sure Lexa ate enough. The alpha had tried, truly, but the omega just wasn’t a big eater. The blonde remembered the first time she had eaten together with Lexa. The Commander had just finished a two-hour long training session, and she should have been starving, but she had only picked at her food.

Clarke was beginning to wonder if this was also a part of her upbringing by the Flamekeepers. 

“She’s right to fuss. You don’t eat enough. After everything you have been through, your calorie needs have increased.” 

Lexa blinked at her. “I don’t know what a calorie is, Klark.”

Clarke had to chuckle to herself. Of course, Lexa wouldn’t know what a calorie was. “It’s too complicated to explain. It just means that to heal you should be eating more.”

“I am doing the best I can,” Lexa grumped. 

Clarke quickly put her hand on Lexa’s cheek. “I know you are. Honestly, with as little as you eat, I am amazed at how strong you are already.”

Lexa looked down. “I don’t feel very strong.”

It seemed that today was the day that Lexa was going to show all her vulnerabilities to Clarke, and the alpha’s heart started to ache with how raw her mate was apparently feeling. 

“Are you kidding? You ran for miles and miles to find me right after giving birth.”

It was the wrong thing to say. Her mate, who had been so strong since she had been found lying in a pile on the ground finally broke. A heart wrenching sob escaped from her mate, and Clarke’s reaction was immediate. She scooped her mate into her lap, and immediately started to pump out pheromones meant to soothe, but they seemed to have the opposite effect. Lexa fisted her hands in the alpha’s shirt and started to sob in earnest. All Clarke could do was clutch Lexa to her.

The alpha had tried to imagine what Lexa had gone through once things went to shit in Polis, but she would be the first to admit that it was hard for her to picture. Her mate was the picture of vibrant strength. Clarke was unable to picture her as having been stripped of that power and thrown into a dark and dank cell. 

She couldn’t picture Lexa pacing the floor or sitting under a meager, threadbare blanket while trapped in a dungeon as her belly swelled with their pup. She couldn’t think about how Lexa must have suffered day in and day out with too little food to eat and the pain that would have clawed at her stomach as a result of that. What it came down to was that if Clarke thought too hard about it, she too would break, and she didn’t know if she was strong enough to handle the heartache she knew would come with that. She wasn’t as strong as Lexa, but she could be strong for her now as she broke down in Clarke’s arms.

She let the omega cry as she whispered words of love into her ears. At one point she saw Anya pop her head out from behind a tree. Concern filled her seda’s (teacher’s) face, but Clarke sent her a look that said if the alpha approached right now, she would annihilate her. She would not abide anyone approaching her mate while she was vulnerable in her alpha’s arms. 

“They didn’t even let me hold her, Klark,” Lexa wailed. For all her strength as Commander, Lexa had been defenseless against the Fleimkepas as they took her pup away. 

“Shh, I know. I know, my love, but I promise you that when we get her back, you will never have to let her go.” Clarke tried to reassure her mate. She wouldn’t voice it, but she would die trying to get their pup back if it meant Lexa could hold Madi in her arms.

As it was, since Clarke had found out about the pup, there was a painful hole in her heart that had been growing steadily each day knowing that her child was out there somewhere and being cared for by someone who was not her. So far, she’d been pretty good at bottling up her emotions about it.

Unlike Lexa, who still had almost nightly nightmares despite the tea, Clarke’s dreams were filled with revenge against the people who took her pup and threw her mate into a dark prison for having done nothing more than love and protect that which was hers. Her mate hadn’t deserved to sit in a cell. She had never done anything wrong. All she had ever done, she had done for her people. Lexa deserved to be held above all others. She did not deserve the treatment she suffered at the hands of her Flamekeepers or the alpha, Ontari.

Further, Clarke was having a hard time reconciling the fact that her mate had suffered for nine full months while she had hidden away from everyone in the forest. She had burned with hatred for her mate for those first few months, but that hatred had simmered into anger, and then the anger fizzled into regret especially knowing that she knew she would have done exactly what Lexa had if she had been offered the same deal. Back then, Clarke would never have admitted that to herself, but she could admit it now.

Eventually Lexa’s sobs died down into the occasional hiccup, but Clarke didn’t let her go. The front of her shirt was soaked with tears, but she didn’t care, in fact, she felt honored that Lexa trusted her enough to let go and finally let out everything she had been holding in for so long. 

The alpha nuzzled her nose into her mating bite on Lexa’s neck, and then she gently grasped it in her teeth causing the omega to gasp. It was a dominant gesture, but it was not Clarke’s intention to show dominance. It was her way of showing Lexa that she was there for her omega, that Lexa belonged to her just as she belonged to Lexa. Nothing would change that, not even the test of time.

“Tell me what you need, Lex,” Clarke implored.

“Right now, I need you to keep holding me, and I need our pup. I don’t know how much longer I can handle knowing she is there in Polis without me being there for her.”

Lexa finally lifted her head from Clarke’s chest. She sniffled and wiped at her eyes, and Clarke wondered if the omega had ever let herself go like that before. She wondered if Lexa had ever broken down while imprisoned or if she were able to maintain her aura of strength the entire time. Clarke believed that her mate probably never let anyone see her having a moment of weakness, but she did hope that Lexa gave in, at least sometimes, and let her emotions out. She couldn’t imagine the pain her mate would have experienced if she’d held in her emotions until just this moment. 

“I’m here, Lexa, and I won’t ever let you go.” Lexa tilted her head again, but this time it was her teeth that latched onto a mating mark. Clarke shivered.

“Do you know that I read somewhere that when a pup is born, it always knows where its mother is, and that it can feel a mother’s love even from miles away?” Clarke ran callused fingers through Lexa’s hair as she explained. “That means our little Madi knows that you are here and fighting for her, and she feels the love you have for her.”

Lexa hiccupped again. “Is that true?”

“It is,” Clarke affirmed. “I can even show you the article when we get back to Arkadia if you want.”

“Can a pup feel its sire’s love as well?” Lexa sniffled as she wiped her eyes.

Clarke sighed and she felt a pang of regret in her heart. “The article didn’t say anything about sires, but I like to believe that Madi can feel my love for her, and if she does, she knows we are coming for her.” She rocked her omega in her arms for a few more minutes until Lexa was finally able to release her.

The omega swiped at her nose with a napkin she grabbed from the basket of food. “Moba, hodnes (sorry, love).” She took a clean napkin and tried to wipe at Clarke’s damp shirt.

Clarke caught her hand and kissed the omega’s knuckles before taking the napkin away. “Don’t ever apologize for showing me how you feel.” She took the clean napkin and fussed over her mate, drying the tear tracks from Lexa’s cheeks. “I feel honored that you trusted me enough with your feelings, and you need to know that I am here for you. I am never going to run away again, and no matter what happens, I will never abandon you or our pup.” She took Lexa’s other hand. “I know you still have doubts that I have fully forgiven you, but you need to trust that I have. If anything, I haven’t forgiven myself for running away. Maybe things would be different if I hadn’t.”

Lexa looked like she wanted to say something, but Clarke stopped her. “It does us no good to look to the past. We need to focus on the here and now. Then, once we have our pup back, we can focus on the incredible future we are going to provide our little girl.”

Lexa’s eyes were still watery when she looked up at Clarke. She looked like she might burst into tears again, but the alpha inherently knew that her mate was too wrung out to cry anymore, so she reached into the basket and found a sealed container of still hot tea. She poured some into a mug and handed it to her mate.

The corners of Lexa’s lips ticked up slightly. “You don’t think this is the same tea that your mother gives me at night, do you?”

“You’ve figured it out too, huh?” Clarke should have known her astute mate would have figured out that Abby was giving Lexa something to help her sleep.

This time the smile was a little bit bigger. “I have, and I appreciate it. I don’t know if I would be able to sleep much without it. She’s a good nomon (mother).”

“She is, isn’t she?” Her mother had been amazing since Clarke had arrived outside Arkadia with Lexa in her arms. “Now let’s see what goodies are hidden in our picnic basket.”

Clarke started to pull out all sorts of food and wondered where it all came from. The variety of items was astounding. Lexa had tried to protest that she was no longer hungry, but after only a few tries, Clarke was able to convince her to eat, and the alpha was impressed when Lexa ate more food than she had ever seen her eat before.

When they finished, they both groaned and flopped over onto the blanket. Lexa pulled Clarke in for a kiss, and the alpha couldn’t help it when her hand strayed under the omega’s dress to run it up the silky skin of Lexa’s thigh.

The scent of Lexa’s arousal hit her like a ton of bricks. “Lex…”

Clarke rolled over onto her mate, being careful to not to put any pressure on her. Lexa’s incision may be healed, but that didn’t mean that everything inside was fully mended. The alpha held herself up on her elbows as she stared down at Lexa. Stormy green eyes stared back at her, and Lexa’s arousal was clear, but so was her lingering sadness.

The alpha leaned down and rubbed the tip of her nose against her omega’s. “That’s called an Eskimo kiss.”

Some of the sadness faded as Lexa’s curiosity was piqued. “Just like with your calorie, I don’t know what an Eskimo is.”

Clarke gave her another Eskimo kiss before she told Lexa all about the people that used to live to the far north, even further north than those that live in Azgeda. She admitted that Eskimo kiss was probably not a very politically correct thing to call the gesture since over time the term Eskimo was replaced by the more accepted term Inuit, but Inuit just didn’t have the same ring to it. No body wanted an Inuit Kiss. 

“How did they survive with such long winters and terrible cold?”

Clarke thought for a minute. She rolled off Lexa and propped herself up on an elbow as she fiddled with a piece of Lexa’s curly hair. “Do whales still exist?” Clarke asked instead.

Lexa shook her head, unsure of the word. 

“You know, fish in the ocean that can grow to be over 50 feet long?”

“Oh, biga swima (big fish),” Lexa said with sudden understanding. “I don’t know if they still exist. People tell stories of having seen them, but I don’t know if they are telling the truth or not. I have not seen one before.”

“Well, Eskimos would hunt the whales and use their blubber as food and the oil as fuel to keep warm.”

Lexa gave Clarke a tight-lipped smile. “You know the oddest things.” The omega rolled so she was facing her mate causing the piece of hair the alpha was playing with to slip from her fingers.

Lexa leaned in for another kiss. “I need you, Clarke, and more than just an Eskimo kiss.” Her voice was pleading, and the alpha wanted to give in.

All the blood rushed to Clarke’s groin. “Lex, we can’t. I might hurt you.”

The omega ignored her mate. She pushed Clarke over and straddled her hips, grinding down on her with her core. “Please, Klark.”

Clarke squeezed her eyes shut willing her clit not to elongate. She could feel the damp heat coming off her mate. “Lex, I will hurt you.”

“You won’t,” the omega protested. “I trust you.” Lexa writhed against her again, and any hope Clarke had of not taking things too far vanished.

Since Lexa started getting better, the alpha could feel her need for her mate building. After trauma, loss, or prolonged periods of stress, mated pairs would be drawn to each other. It was an innate need to share and be intimate with one another that would become increasingly painful if the need was ignored. Clarke wondered how Lexa had survived the pain all those months locked away. It would have been nearly similar to the pain of abandonment a person feels when their mate dies or willingly walks away from the relationship. It was something Clarke had felt when Lexa had betrayed her at the Mountain, but then, her burning hatred and anger had fueled her on. Had Lexa felt abandoned by the alpha’s running away? Clarke wouldn’t know until she asked. Lexa had walked away from her that day, but she knew now it hadn’t been willingly. The girl, Lexa, had wanted nothing more than to be with her mate, but the woman, Heda, had to think of her people first, and duty had dictated the omega’s actions that day.

Clarke sighed. So far, she had been doing okay ignoring the need she had to be intimate with her mate because Lexa’s health was far more important than her base desires, but it seemed that Lexa’s own struggle had gotten to be too much. 

The omega had been through things than Clarke couldn’t imagine. Truly, it was remarkable that Lexa had been able to hold off for as long as she had, and it probably had everything to do with the fact that Lexa and Clarke had only just mated before the omega had been forced to walk away from her mate. They hadn’t had time to develop their bond fully, but now, having spent several weeks in such close proximity to one another, their bond was completed, and that meant certain needs could no longer be ignored.

In Lexa’s eyes, she was healthy enough to further strengthen her bond with her mate, and Clarke could see that there wasn’t going to be any stopping her now; not that Clarke wanted to stop.

“We will be careful, niron. I know you will not hurt me.” Lexa’s trust in her mate had Clarke gasping in surprise, but still the alpha shook her head.

“Beja Klark (Please Clarke). I need this. I have…I have lost so much. I thought I lost you too, but we have found each other again and I need,” Lexa’s eyes began to water again, “I need to feel you inside me. I need to know that you are real because each night when I fall asleep, I fear I will wake up and be back in that cell without you and without our pup. I need to know that what we have is real.”

Clarke engulfed her vulnerable mate in an all-encompassing embrace, smothering the omega in soothing pheromones. “Shh, Lex. I will give you what you need.” She let go of her mate and stood, eliciting a whimper from the needy omega. “Just let me clear the forest of unwanted onlookers. I will be right back.”

She scented the air and followed her nose where each of Lexa’s guards were hiding. Indra and Gustus had the good sense to hightail it out of the area when the Skai alpha approached, but when Clarke got to Anya’s hiding place, which happened to be high up in a tree, she stood at the base of it and sent caustic dominant pheromones wafting up to the other alpha until Anya relented and climbed back down to the ground.

Clarke could see that Anya was about to lecture her on how stupid she was being, but she held up a hand and commanded silence from her seda. 

“I know you think what we are about to do is stupid because Lexa is not ready, but she is. Even from here, I can feel her calling for me. She needs this Anya, and so do I, and I promise you that I will be gentle. She will not get hurt, but if she does, you have permission to wipe my ass across the training field tomorrow.”

Anya looked like she still wanted to protest, but she didn’t. She nodded at Clarke and turned to walk away. She stopped when she was about 5 feet away. “I’m going to wipe your ass across the training field tomorrow anyway because of your stupidity, whether you hurt her or not.”

Clarke chuckled, knowing it was true. She scrubbed at her face when what she really wanted to do was readjust herself because she was painfully hard, but she didn’t want to draw attention to her obvious bulge.

“Anya, she’s been through so much; more than you or I will ever know, so I am not going to deny her when she asks something of me. Besides, I am sure by now you know how painful it is to be away from your mate. Think of how hard it was for her and think about how much worse it will be if we ignore her needs. We can’t have her going into the upcoming battle distracted and in pain because I denied her something that is my duty to provide.” 

Clarke took a few steps toward Anya. “I am hers, General, and she is not just your Heda, she is also mine, and I will follow any command that she gives me, now go away before you get an eyeful of something I know you really don’t want to see.”

Anya raised an eyebrow and looked impressed. She nodded again at the younger alpha. “I trust you, Clarke. I know you won’t hurt her.”

“Mochof (Thankyou), Anya. That means a lot.”

“Go back to your omega, branwoda (fool), before she goes and finds a different alpha to satisfy her needs.”

Anya snickered when Clarke growled at her, and she laughed heartily when the blonde flipped her the bird.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't name chapters, but if I had, this one would have been called Vulnerabilities. We don't often see Heda Lexa's, and I, for one, enjoyed writing this softer, more vulnerable side of her. Don't worry, she's going to be tough as nails when she needs to be, and honestly, I think showing that she can be vulnerable is a strength. 
> 
> Also, sorry to end the chapter where I did. It was getting long. There will be smut next chapter. Gentle smut because Clarke needs to treat her precious omega gently and with care. I will denote where it starts and ends so that those of you who don't care for smut can skip it. I will post again on Sunday.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had hoped to post this earlier, but a little thing called work got in the way. 
> 
> There is some smut at the end of this chapter, and I mark it with ***** at the beginning. It goes to the end of the chapter. It's not overly explicit. It's really quite sweet I think. Think of it as smut lite, more romance novel-y than anything else.

Chapter 6

Clarke made haste back to her omega. She hadn’t been gone long, but in that time, Lexa had cleared the remnants of their picnic. The blanket was free of debris and containers, and the look of longing she gave the alpha had the blonde sprinting the last few feet to get to her mate. Her nose twitched. The area was flooded with Lexa’s need, and Clarke was glad she cleared it because she did not need the other grounders scenting just how needy Lexa had become. 

She stood above her mate, and as she looked down, she wondered at Lexa’s beauty. The sun was lighting the edges of her hair, and if Clarke believed in religion, she would have thought an angel was lying before her. She was stunned by the omega’s magnificence. Lexa was still young, only a few years older than herself, but she radiated strength and power along with the softer sides of herself that the omega hadn’t been able to enjoy before now. 

Being a grounder meant that softness equated weakness. Theirs was a society built on strength, and any hint of gentleness, especially in a Commander, was not only frowned upon, but it was also punished. That Lexa had been able to rise above all her other Nightblood brothers and sisters to become Heda was an unheard-of achievement. Never had there been an omega Heda before. She had been heralded as the strongest omega to ever live, and it was likely that it was true. Lexa was able to withstand the dominance of even the strongest alphas all while being able to persuade even her sharpest critics to do her bidding. She wielded her powers of persuasion like a well-honed knife, and she could get even the most stubborn person to follow her will.

She was also unmatched in her ability to fight. Give her a weapon, and she could best anyone, even an opponent thrice her size. From the time she was a small girl, she had trained to become an expert in weaponry, but it was her deadly accuracy with her dual swords that won her the Conclave. It had also led her to victory during a battle shortly after becoming Heda. 

The leader of Podakru (the lake people) had not taken kindly to the fact that an omega had bested his alpha Nighblood and beaten him to the title of Heda. Maddox kom Podakru had been slated to win the Conclave when the strongest contender, Luna kom Floukru, ran away after being forced to kill her little brother during the trials. Lexa had always been a force to be reckoned with, but no one ever expected an omega to win the Conclave and become Commander. 

Erik kom Podakru had amassed his forces thinking he could rise up and take the throne of Polis for himself believing he would be able to defeat the untested omega Commander, but in the two short weeks it had taken him to move his troops and challenge the omega, Lexa had already garnered the loyalty of the other clans. Her army was already vast when Erik arrived with his men, and she could have stood back while her gona (warriors) fought for her, but that is not what happened. She rode in on her jet-black horse, waving her two swords as her red sash floated through the air. She was the first person to meet his army, and the speed at which she began to dispatch his men had the Podakru leader attempting to run away just as the battle began. He didn’t get far.

As soon as she spotted him, the omega charged through his men, sweeping her blades through the bellies or soft throats of anyone who got in her way. When she finally had him close enough, she dropped one of her swords and reached for her dagger. With deadly accuracy, she flung her blade through the air, catching the coward in the back of his thigh as he tried to run away. 

He fell to the ground and begged for mercy, even exposing his neck to Heda in submission. No mercy was given that day. He was strung to a tree and given death by a thousand cuts for his cowardice and treason. When it was Lexa’s turn to finish off the traitor, she hadn’t given him the traditional death of a dagger to the heart, no, in a show of true strength, she cleaved the man’s head off his body with a flick of her sword. 

She lifted the head in her hands, brandishing it before over a thousand witnesses. “Ai laik Heda (I am the Commander),” she shouted. “Does anyone else wish to challenge my rule?” Every warrior, every leader, had bowed to her that day in submission. She’d been 13 years old at the time.

In the 11 years to follow, there had been other battles and other challenges, but she had always come out on top. With the support of the Fleimkepas, she was unstoppable, and in time, there was peace. The 12 clans mostly worked in harmony. Heda Lexa’s reign was the longest, and the most peaceful in the history of the grounders.

Clarke remembers shivering when Indra told her that story. It was the beta woman’s attempt to scare the alpha, but instead it had had the opposite effect. The blonde had been even more drawn and more attracted to the young Commander.

Staring down at her omega mate now, Clarke saw nothing but strength. Lexa was at a low point in her life now because of the traitorous Flamekeepers and the usurper Ontari, but the blonde had no doubt that Lexa would rise up again. She had the support of the Coalition and Skaikru, and more importantly, she now had her mate at her side, and there was not a force on Earth that would stop the alpha from helping her mate regain her throne, and once Lexa got it, Clarke would be the first to kneel before her and swear her fealty. 

“Clarke, you are staring.” 

The alpha had to shake herself. She was staring, and she might have even been drooling a little. Her need for her mate had become just as urgent as Lexa’s was for her, but she was determined to take things slow lest she hurt the woman before her who was still healing from her grievous injuries.

“Moba (sorry).” Clarke could feel the tips of her ears turning pink. “You are just so, so magnificent.”

Lexa looked down. “I don’t feel very magnificent.”

“Then I am going to have to show you until you believe me.” Clarke slowly lowered herself to her knees. She took one more look around the forest to make sure they were truly alone, and she started to lift her shirt. It was another hot day, and she was sweaty from her earlier training session, but Lexa didn’t seem to mind. In fact, she scented the air as soon as the alpha’s shirt was off leaving her only in her chest binding, and the look that overtook the omega’s face was one of pure lust.

“Ain (mine).” Lexa’s gaze was fierce and possessive.

“Yes, yours.” Clarke wasn’t sure when it happened, but she knew there was nothing that she wouldn’t do for her omega. The love that surged through her veins was one she could now admit had been there since before they had even mated. She’d been understandably angry and upset at Mount Weather, but Clarke now realized that what Lexa had done was maybe the most selfless thing she could have done that day. The omega had risked a lifetime of the ire of her mate to save her people. She had walked away from Clarke and back to Polis knowing that she could lose the throne. The alpha knew her mate loved her, and that she had risked that love because of the love she also held for her people showed a strength that was far beyond that of anyone the blonde had ever known. 

Clarke wasn’t the only one that was sweating. Lexa’s forehead glistened with moisture, but Clarke thought perhaps it wasn’t the heat that was making her sweat. She leaned in and kissed her mate’s forehead tasting salt, and minerals, and omega.

She hummed as she trailed her lips down to a bushy eyebrow, then to a velvety eye lid, to a cheekbone, and finally to Lexa’s silky lush lips. Her mate, who was tense with need started to relax as Clarke’s hands started to wander over Lexa’s subtle omega curves. She may still be underweight, but Lexa was still all omega. Her hard muscles were not as pronounced as an alpha’s, but the woman was still wildly toned despite her prolonged confinement, and on top of that, the brunette’s body still possessed the changes that came with pregnancy, and it was driving Clarke mad with desire. Later she would lament the fact that she had missed those important months with her mate. Right now, all she could focus on was giving her omega the pleasure she so craved.

A rumble started in Lexa’s chest just as Clarke’s tongue gained entrance into the omega’s mouth with her tongue. The kiss was not rushed. It was slow and sweet, and the alpha found that her chest began to match Lexa’s with her own rumble.

Purring, she lifted her head and shifted her hands to the relatively safe and somewhat non-erogenous area of Lexa’s hips. “Lex, I need to know that you are sure about this. Are you really ready?”

“Klark, you are all I thought about for months. I remember when you told me about your time in solitary and how you felt like you were going insane because all you had were the same walls and the same lighting surrounding you day and day out. It was the same for me, but it was thoughts of you that kept me sane. When it got bad, I would remember what your hands felt like when they were touching me. I would think about how insistent your tongue had been, and I would cherish the memory of how it felt when you were inside me. I want to feel that again, Klark. I need to know…I need to know that you still want me.”

Clarke moved her hands and shifted so that she was sitting on her knees. Lexa whimpered at the loss of contact and something akin to fear flashed across her eyes. Was she about to be rejected?

The alpha was quick to cup her omega’s cheeks wanting to assuage her fears. She leaned in and stole a quick kiss before leaning back again so that she could look Lexa in the eyes.

“Lex, don’t you know by now that you are the only thing I want?” She leaned in for another quick kiss. “Shortly after I ran away, I experienced my first rut ever.”

Lexa looked shocked by this information. 

“On the Ark, we were given suppressants. Omegas didn’t experience their heats, and alphas didn’t go into rut because of the medicine we were given. We were taught what to expect, but in space, until we had an intended, we wouldn’t be allowed off our meds. Then we could mate and have one pup. After that we would be put on our suppressants again.” 

Lexa still looked confused. 

“I’m explaining myself poorly. What I am trying to say is that when I was alone in the woods, my rut began, and I was confused by the changes in my body. I also didn’t expect the pain, but you want to know what got me through it?”

Lexa nodded.

“It was thoughts of you. Even when I still thought I was angry with you; it was thoughts of you that soothed me during my first rut. It was remembering our times together that kept me calm, and I will be honest, it was remembering our last night together that kept me from finding the first omega I could just to satisfy the crazy urges I was having.” Lexa growled, but Clarke ignored it. “I couldn’t help but touch myself, but I would pretend it was you. I remembered what it felt like to have your hands on me, and then your lips and your tongue, and I…well, let’s just say without you, I don’t know if I would have survived that first rut.”

“Klark, ai…”

“Shh. Just know that I want you. I have wanted you since that first meeting in your tent and you scared the crap out of me by playing with your dagger. I was terrified of you, but still I wanted you.” Clarke ran a longer finger over the shell of Lexa’s ear. “You also need to know that in all that time, I never stopped loving you.”

Clarke could see that Lexa was fighting tears, and she didn’t know if she should be heartbroken or elated that her strong omega would shed tears for her. Since finding each other again, Lexa was different. She showed her fears and her vulnerabilities. She spoke of her wishes and her needs, but she only showed them to her alpha. After her one moment of weakness when she told Anya she was not the Commander anymore, the mask of Heda had returned, and she put on a show of strength that boggled the blonde’s head. Even after all the injustices she had suffered at the hands of her own people, at the hands of her Flamekeeper, Lexa still carried herself with an air of authority. 

Clarke smirked. This was true even when she walked up to her and Anya earlier while wearing a flowing summer dress and sandals. 

She kissed Lexa’s knuckles. “I hate that you still have doubts, but when I am through with you, you won’t have them anymore. I am going to show you just how much I want and love you.”

The alpha didn’t give her omega a chance to respond. The blonde moved until she was straddling Lexa’s hips. She ground down into her, letting the omega feel her erection. Lexa groaned and arched her back, trying to feel more of her partner.

“Be patient, Lex, and I will give you everything you want.”

Clarke abruptly got off her mate again, and Lexa huffed in frustration. “Shush.” She reached for the extra blanket that had been carried along with them and folded it up. The omega watched curiously and looked like she wanted to ask her alpha what she was up to, but she kept her mouth shut.

The blanket was set next to Lexa and then green eyes locked onto that alpha’s body as Clarke made a show of shucking off her trousers. She slowly pushed the material down her well-muscled legs. The alpha wasn’t as strapping and muscle bound as many of the other alphas Lexa had seen in her life, but the blonde’s body exuded power along with its gracefulness. The omega had only ever seen Clarke’s bare legs one other time, and since then, they were more defined, more toned, than they had been. All of Clarke was more chiseled than she used to be. Her time in isolation, away from her people had hardened her body, and the alpha looked more grounder than Skaikru now.

Clarke slowly unwrapped her breast binding, and she may have been more muscled than she was before, but she was still all woman, and it took everything in Lexa not to lunge at her mate. Instead, she waited with bated breath as the alpha then leisurely pushed down the tight boy-shorts she had been wearing. 

The alpha took one last look around the forest and was satisfied that they were truly alone. She pushed the material the last few inches before kicking it away with her feet. 

The omega blinked in surprise as Clarke’s hard cock sprung out from dark blonde hair. All her life, Lexa had been around nakedness. In the grounder culture, there was no shame in being bare before another, in fact, it stemmed from necessity. The only running water in the Coalition was in Heda’s tower, and therefore, streams, lakes, ponds, and rivers were the primary source of water to get oneself clean. There were common bathing areas that were often populated with many people at the same time, especially during warmer weather, so seeing a naked form was not shocking. It was that she was not used to seeing a female alpha’s changed anatomy. During a rut, a female alpha’s clit would change and stay that way until the rut was over, but at any other time, a female alpha looked like any other female. It took a high level of arousal for a female alpha’s clit to engorge and extend when not in rut. It spoke of Clarke’s lust and virility the day they mated for she had not been in rut. It spoke of it right then as well.

“Uh, Lexa…” The omega had been staring for so long the alpha was getting a little nervous.

“Shh. Let me look at you. The last time I saw you like this it was dark. I didn’t get to…fully appreciate just how attractive you are.”

Clarke couldn’t help but puff up her chest with pride. During her time away, the alpha had felt small and inadequate, so having her mate gaze at her like she was the last morsel of food in the world had her feeling giddy. She hadn’t realized how much she needed Lexa’s approval of her form like this. Before, the consummation of their mating had been hurried and borne of desperation, but now they had time to reconnect. 

“Take your dress off,” Clarke demanded. Her voice went down an octave letting her omega know her command was to be obeyed.

The omega looked suddenly shy. She knew Clarke had seen parts of her body recently, but she hadn’t seen her fully naked yet, and she wasn’t sure if the alpha would like the changes she found once she was fully exposed.

Being imprisoned had taken a toll on the omega, not only on her physical self but also on her psyche. She was still strong-willed, but she was no longer as unflappable as she used to be. Some of her self-confidence had disappeared during her time trapped in the dank room of the dungeons for so long. She was still underweight, but she also still bore the changes of pregnancy. She worried that her alpha might not desire her the same way once she saw her fully exposed and in the light.

Easily sensing Lexa’s sudden reservations, Clarke swooped into action. “Hodnes (love),” the alpha tried the grounder endearment out and found it to be pleasing, “there’s no need to be shy. It’s just me.”

“But I have changed, Klark.” Lexa’s voice was laced with a whimper.

*****

“I know,” Clarke admitted. “You are even more beautiful than you were before.” Suddenly the naked alpha was lying next to her still clothed mate. She ran a hand up Lexa’s leg, pushing the material of her dress up with it. She leaned in and kissed the skin just to the inside of the omega’s knee eliciting a quiet moan from the brunette.

“I have dreamed of you for so long.” Another kiss, a little higher up. “I have been fantasizing about having my hands and mouth on you for months.” A left hand snaked up under Lexa’s dress to rest on her hip. “I have imagined what it would feel like to have my fingers deep inside you as you came around them,” the fingers skirted under the band of Lexa’s underwear, “and I have daydreamed endlessly about filling you with this.” Clarke took Lexa’s hand and guided it to her erection. She gasped when the omega’s fingers instantly clamped on. 

“In my dreams, you have always been beautiful, but having you here with me right now, you are more stunning than ever. There is no one that compares to you.”

The alpha moved her head higher and nipped at the smooth skin of Lexa’s thigh. Both hands moved to grasp the material of Lexa’s dress. “May I?”

Lexa couldn’t form words. She too had been dreaming of this moment for months. She nodded her head, and the slippery material of her dress started to move up.

“Lift your hips, love.”

She did. She stared at Clarke as the alpha pushed her dress up over her hips, exposed her torso, and then her chest. The alpha’s head followed the movement of the material, and she peppered the newly exposed skin with kisses and love bites. When she got to the stretchy cloth covering Lexa’s breasts, the blonde leaned forward and nipped at the material just over the omega’s clothed nipples, and she delighted when Lexa gasped and arched her back in response.

“So, so beautiful.” Clarke impatiently pushed the dress up and over Lexa’s head and raked her eyes over her mate once she was mostly exposed. It was true that Lexa’s body had changed. There were a few new scars that hadn’t been there before, most prominent being the red angry scar of her rushed c-section, but they didn’t make the omega any less magnificent. Even with her binding on, the omega’s breasts were fuller while her torso was more concave. Her ordeal had altered her, but Clarke found her just as alluring, if not more so, than she had before. She leaned over and worshipped each scar with her lips and fingertips.

“I want to see the rest of you.” Clarke moved and helped Lexa sit up, and with hands trembling with anticipation, she unwrapped the binding from around her omega’s chest. She growled in appreciation as more skin was exposed, and she latched her lips around a pert nipple the second it was available to her. 

“Klark,” Lexa yipped, not expecting the sudden sensation. 

Clarke smirked without letting go. Her hands began to wander even as she revered the woman beneath her with her mouth. When they got to Lexa’s last bit of remaining clothing, steely blue eyes looked up, silently asking for permission to remove the undergarment.

All Lexa could do was tip her chin up and down. She was quivering with nerves and excitement as slender fingers wrapped around the material and pushed it over her hips. Clarke whined when she had to let go of the nipple she had been sucking on in order to fully bare her mate. When Lexa was completely exposed before her, she stared unabashedly, drinking in the sight before her.

Her mate was the most beautiful creature she had ever laid eyes on. “What’s your word for beautiful?”

“Wh-what?”

“In trig. What’s your word for beautiful?” Clarke repeated.

“M-meizen,” Lexa finally answered.

“Meizen. Yu ste meizen (You are beautiful),” Lexa’s entire body flushed pink, “and now I am going to worship you the way you deserve to be.”

With no further hesitation, Clarke’s hands and mouth devoured every inch of Lexa’s bare skin. She nipped and pinched, kissed and soothed every place she touched, and her mate writhed under her care. She dropped feather light kisses over Lexa’s scars and slowly made her way where she knew Lexa wanted her most.

When she got to the apex of Lexa’s legs, the alpha inhaled deeply, committing the scent of her mate to memory. She nuzzled her nose in the damp curls between Lexa’s legs and grazed Lexa’s clit with the tip of her tongue causing the omega to shudder violently.

She stared up at her mate with glinting sapphire eyes. Smirking, Clarke grabbed the blanket she had folded earlier. “Brace this over your belly, niron. It will help splint your scar and prevent any injury if you tense too hard.”

Lexa did as the alpha asked. She clutched the rolled-up blanket to herself with one hand as she dug the fingers of the other into Clarke’s golden hair. The alpha had started to do things with her tongue that had the omega moaning and crying out. 

“Klark.” Without warning the alpha had slipped two fingers deep into her mate. 

“Beja, dula op nou hod op (please, do not stop),” Lexa yelled when Clarke started to slowly thrust her fingers in and out of her mate all while circling the omega’s sensitive bud with her tongue.

The omega started to thrash under the attention, and finally fully understood the importance of the blanket when she felt things in her simultaneously clench and stretch. She clasped the folded covering tighter to her as her alpha worked her into such a state that she felt like she was floating above herself.

It took an embarrassingly short amount of time before Clarke was sending her over the edge. The alpha had her coming so violently that the alpha had to wait several minutes before she was able to remove her fingers. 

When Clarke looked at her mate it was with glinting azure eyes and a glistening chin, her face was lit up with a brilliant smile. “Meizen,” she whispered.

She made her way back up to her winded mate and kissed her omega so thoroughly that not only did Lexa taste herself on her mate’s lips, but she also lost the little breath she had. 

“Klark,” she gasped. “Ai hod yu in (I love you).”

“I love you too, Lex, so much.”

“I still need you, Klark.”

“I know, love. I know. I need you too, but I need to make sure you are okay first.” Clarke sat up and carefully prodded at the area around Lexa’s scar. She deliberately put pressure through her mate’s abdomen. When Lexa didn’t flinch or groan, the alpha was convinced that she was okay. “Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you by accident.”

Lexa growled. “Ai na laksen yu taim yu dula op nou jok ai nau (I will hurt you if you don’t fuck me now).”

Clarke’s eyes were blown. “I love it when you say such wicked things, when you are so demanding and needy.”

Clarke moved in between Lexa’s legs again and slicked herself up, wanting to thrust into her omega, but using every bit of self-control she had to take things slow. “Heda should be hedonistic more often.”

The omega was about to protest about her title. “I’m not…” Clarke took that moment to push slightly into her mate. Her eyes rolled in ecstasy and Lexa cried out. 

The alpha hesitated and looked deeply into her mate’s eyes, making sure she was not hurting her. “Mou (more), beja Klark, mou.”

“Okay, Lex. Okay.” She slowly eased herself into her mate watching Lexa’s eyes intently for any signs of discomfort. She held still for a minute when she bottomed out, letting her omega adjust to the stretch. 

“Gods you feel so good.”

Lexa was now beyond words. She was a sputtering, mewling mess, and she kept thrusting her hips trying to get her mate to move.

Giving into her mate’s whims, Clarke started to move slowly, moaning as she slid out until only the tip of her cock was in her mate. She took one last look to make sure Lexa was okay then pushed back in. She set up a steady rhythm, not going so slow as to frustrate her mate, but not going so fast and hard that she hurt her. It took everything in the alpha not to plunge into her mate the way she wanted to. 

“You’re so tight and wet for me. You are mine.” She thrust in especially deep but not hard, making both of them moan. She pushed her tongue into Lexa’s mouth, demanding entrance. She sped up her thrusts but kept them gentle. “I love you, Lex. Gods, so much.” She latched onto Lexa’s mating mark. She could feel her knot growing but didn’t know if Lexa could take it.

As if reading her mind, Lexa said, “I want it, Klark. Beja, don’t deny me.”

Clarke wasn’t sure she could deny her omega even if she wanted to. She plunged into her mate with a rapidity that surprised even herself and maybe with more strength than she should have, but she couldn’t stop, and Lexa continued to beg. 

Lexa’s pleading didn’t stop, and she cried out for her mate. “Beja, Klark. Huk op em gon ai nau (Please, Clarke. Give it to me now).” 

With a herculean effort to be gentle, and with an undignified grunt, Clarke pushed. Her knot snapped into place tipping both omega and alpha over the edge. The alpha filled her mate with her seed, and even though she was locked in place, she continued to jog her hips, sending Lexa and herself crashing through another orgasm. 

Clarke collapsed onto her mate. She rolled so that they were lying facing each other. Her eyes were closed while she caught her breath. When she opened them, she was startled to find her mate crying again, and a whine escaped her lips.

“Lexa, oh gods. I hurt you.” She moved back, forgetting they were tied together. Lexa cried out, but not in pain. She was coming again. 

Clarke let her ride out her orgasm and tried to stem the flow of her omega’s tears with her thumbs, but it didn’t help. She whined again, conflicted. She didn’t know what was wrong with her mate. Before she could question her mate, Lexa bit down hard on the mating mark on Clarke’s neck, reaffirming her commitment to the alpha. 

She could feel Lexa’s chest convulsing as she cried, but the omega didn’t let go, so Clarke simply engulfed her in her arms and waited for the omega to cry herself out.

“Mochof (thank you), Klark. Mochof.” Lexa hiccupped. “Ai hod yu in.”

“Oh, Lex, my love. I’ve got you, and I am not ever letting go.”

Lexa bit down harder, and Clarke held in a girlish squeal. Her mate had been through so much, and the alpha understood that this was a catharsis for her mate. She let her cry knowing that the tears the omega wept were those of sorrow and joy. She just hoped that her mate never had to bottle up her emotions like she had ever again. Once they had their pup back, Clarke would make sure that the three of them lived a happy life. She would provide a life to Lexa that neither one of them had ever dreamed of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your comments and kudos. I love hearing from all of you. Next chapter will have a pretty badass moment from Lexa.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What a year 2021 has already been. 
> 
> Anyhow, here's the next chapter. Parts of it I love, and parts of it feel so clunky to me, but it is what it is.

Chapter 7

It had been four blissful days since Lexa and Clarke had made love in the woods, and since that time, Lexa had openly and affectionately showed every bit of devotion that she had for her mate. She became very touchy feely, and any time apart had her feeling edgy and anxious.

Aden, who was usually composed, and a perfect little gentleman, had been teasing her endlessly about her new, open, affection for her mate.

Since Anya had ‘stolen’ Aden from Polis, the boy had been a pleasant thorn in Lexa’s side. As soon as she was well enough, and he was allowed to visit, he had glommed onto her and spent as much time with her as possible, at least until Clarke playfully growled at him and told him to beat it. 

It was a pleasure for Lexa to witness. In Polis, Natblidas (Nightbloods) were rigorously trained, and expected to act like adults from the time they were found and brought before Heda and the Order. Despite many of them being torn from their homes simply for having blood the color of midnight, they were not allowed time to adjust to their new surroundings. The Fleimkepas were strict and extremely rigid in their teachings, and their young wards learned quickly to toe the line lest they be punished harshly. 

From what Lexa had learned, former Hedas had been just as rigid and harsh, and it was why the current novitiates adored Lexa so much. She was lenient and loving toward her young charges. The omega in her would not allow such severe treatment of the children under her care. She and Titus had gone round and round about it. She had adhered to much of her teachings, but this she would not relent upon. She would not allow the children under her care to grow up into the hard, emotionless creatures Titus and the rest of the order expected them to be. 

Maybe that was what caused the crack in her relationship with Titus. He had been like a father to her, rarely showing true affection, but caring for her needs just the same. The day he had stood against her and sided with the Order, the day he found out she was not only mated but also pregnant had wrought a large hole in her heart that was only now beginning to heal. His turning on her had hurt more than she would like to admit.

Having her mate, and one of her novitiates near her was helping to fill to void that Titus left behind. It didn’t fill the gap that was left knowing her pup was still trapped with that infernal man and the bitch, Ontari, but it did help to have the spritely pup at her side. 

Having escaped the clutches of the order, with Anya’s help, had changed the boy. He was still regal and well-mannered, but there was a lightness and mischievousness that Lexa had never seen in him before. It was infectious, and she found herself smiling often at his antics.

She would regularly catch her mate looking at her with amused eyes when the omega would burst out laughing at something Aden had done. It made her alpha’s eyes twinkle with amusement.

Living with Skaikru was so very different than living in Polis under the watchful eye of Titus and the Order. Lexa couldn’t deny that life was hard for these people who were so new to living on the ground, but there was also a thankfulness and a sense of gratitude that her people didn’t possess. 

Her people felt that because they had survived Praimfaya that the Earth belonged to them and no others. They had been fighting for so long to keep what was theirs that they lost the gratitude that should have gone along with their survival. 

It may be because it was still so new to them, but Clarke’s people radiated with hope and a desire to learn and grow in their new world. Were they satisfied to be confined to the little patch of land they currently held in Trikru? Certainly not, but it wasn’t because they wanted to take something that did not belong to them, it was because they desired to see what more was out there. They had a desire to learn about their new home and their new world, and they wanted to do it without the constant threat of annihilation.

It was refreshing to watch her new people (because they were her people now and they would become part of the Coalition just as soon as Lexa got her throne back). She watched as a mother held out a cup of water to her pup. She watched as the delinquents played a game of cards at a table too small to fit all of them, and she watched as Abby and Chancellor Kane tried to hide their relationship from the doctor’s daughter. 

Lexa smirked because thus far, they had been successful at hiding the budding love they had for one another, although, in Clarke’s defense, it was probably because she had nothing but heart eyes for her mate. Since their shared time in the woods, Lexa knew that Clarke was seeing the world through rose-colored glasses. They’d had many meetings with ambassadors and leaders from the other clans, and they were nearly ready to attack Polis. Lexa just needed a little more time to heal, and it was graciously being given to her. Clarke, and Abby too, was making sure of that. That Clarke took everything Lexa did and said to heart, helped the omega immensely. 

She enjoyed watching her mate. The blonde seemed to have a new outlook on life. Before the Mountain, the alpha had been serious and rarely smiled. Lexa was certain that she had never heard Clarke laugh prior to the battle, but now, her mate was quick to laughter, and had a playful side that Lexa would never have guessed the blonde possessed. It was refreshing and unlike any of her people. 

Anya too was a changed woman. She was more relaxed, and it seemed that her stoicism had vanished with her mating to Raven kom Skaikru. She had rarely ever shown her sense of humor, but now, she could be found joking with Bellamy or playing a joke on her shrewd mate. She and Raven seemed to have a running tally of who could play the most practical jokes on one another. 

The alpha general’s appearance had changed as well. She still mostly favored grounder clothing, but Anya’s hair was free of its typical braids, and it was several inches shorter. She looked softer. She looked free.

Anya took her position as Lexa’s general extremely seriously, but here in Arkadia, she didn’t have to keep up appearances. There was no one for her to constantly impress, and here there were no alpha pissing matches. No one cared who was the strongest alpha, and no one cared about power and domination. The people of the Sky played on an even playing field, and Anya seemed to be taking this in stride.

It had also come as a surprise that while those in the Coalition still respected, and even worshipped Heda and the Flame, they did not feel the same way about the Flamekeepers. They felt that the Order had strong-armed their way into their positions, and once in place, they couldn’t be unseated. Over the past few years, despite Lexa being Heda, the Order had enacted new laws that affected everyone, and most people weren’t pleased about this. 

They believed that Heda reigned supreme; that the Order was pushing its way into her reign was something most people were against. Lexa would be lying if she didn’t admit that she was stunned by the support she was given. 

She continued to look around her temporary home. She wasn’t quite used to sleeping withing the confines of the metal monstrosity that was the Ark, but she appreciated that her mate and Abby were doing their best to make sure she was comfortable and felt at home.

Anya was having a similar experience, although she’d had a lot longer to get used to living in the Ark. The omega blinked. She still had a hard time wrapping her head around that fact that her mentor, her best friend, was still alive. She had mourned Anya’s death, and somehow the deep, deep hole that Anya’s supposed death had caused in her heart hadn’t quite filled yet. Lexa was still afraid that Anya’s return was just a dream. Walking around Arkadia often felt like a dream too. The place was so foreign to her, even as it became more familiar, and she still couldn’t quite grasp that she had been able to escape her prison and get to her mate.

She also had a hard time believing that Clarke had forgiven her so easily, and that the alpha’s people had accepted her with open arms.

She looked up to find her mate just as Prince Roan kom Azgeda approached her. She had thought the man had left to speak with his people.

He pulled her aside and out of sight over the others. He bade her follow him out of Arkadia and into the woods. “I wanted to give you something, Heda.” He conspiratorially pulled out a soft leather bag form under his shirt. 

Lexa quirked an eyebrow at her title. She was slowly beginning to accept that she was still indeed Heda, even if she no longer had control of Polis. “What is it?”

Roan rolled his eyes. “Just open it.” 

When she did, she had to mute her gasp. The contents of the bag were something she never expected to hold in her hand, for in the bag was the bone headpiece worn by the now deceased Azplana. Lexa had learned that the coward Ontari had dispossessed the Queen of her head in the middle of the night shortly before storming Polis and stealing the throne.

Nia’s downfall had been stealing the Nightblood from her home and trying to make the alpha into herself. Nia had been rigid and strict, and she, along with a few of her most trusted gona (warriors) trained the young alpha each day without end.

It had led to resentment in the young alpha, but it also gave her certain aspirations. She desired not only to rule Azgeda, but she wanted the entire Coalition to bow at her feet. She wanted power, and she wanted loyalty, and she didn’t care if she got it by strong arming people, threats, or underhanded tactics. 

“Wh-why are you giving this to me?” Lexa asked.

One corner of Roan’s lips ticked up. “Without it, Ontari will never rule Azgeda. She thought by taking my mother’s head that she would become Azplana, but the headpiece you hold now, that awful, stinking piece of bone, has been passed down through time. No one can rule without it.”

“Why didn’t you keep it for yourself?” Lexa queried. She had thought he would want to be king.

“I have no desire to rule, Heda. Maybe I did at one time, but my mother, and now Ontari, has soured any longing I might have had.” He was so sincere when he said it that she had not doubt that this was true.

“Who would you have rule in your stead?” Lexa asked.

“My sister, Costia.” Roan refused to look in the omega’s eyes as he said this.

Lexa froze, but a low, menacing rumble started low in her chest. She lifted her lips into a sneer. “You told me she was dead.” She growled.

“Lex, ah, I mean Heda, you know how my mother was with her. If we hadn’t found a way for Costia to disappear, she would have died there. Mother was so horrible to her, and when she found out you two were falling in love, she meant to use that against you.”

Lexa grabbed Roan by the throat. “It wasn’t like that. We were never lovers, but she was my dearest friend, and you have let me believe that she was dead…for years.”

She pushed Roan away in disgust. He stumbled over a root and nearly fell. Even in her diminished stated, Heda was no one to be trifled with. “It wasn’t my idea. It was hers,” he protested.

“Where is she?” Lexa roared.

A lithe figure stepped out from behind a tree. “I’m right here, Lexa.” 

Lexa thought she was going to faint. Her nostrils were instantly assailed by the other woman’s rich alpha scent. Costia smelled of lily of the valley and damp forest leaves, and while the scent never called to Lexa’s omega, it did evoke a strong emotion in her. Costia was her best friend, and her scent was that of home.

Looking at the sable-haired woman, she didn’t know if she wanted to hug her friend or punch her in the face. It had been seven long years since she had seen the alpha, and in those years, she had fought tooth and nail to keep the alliance together; the alliance that had been mostly Costia’s idea. 

She had also mourned the passing of her friend. It had almost broken her when one of Roan’s messengers had arrived with a package and a letter informing her that her dearest friend had died. The package, found on her bed, contained what Lexa thought was Costia’s head. The runner, who Anya had to talk Lexa out of killing, had brought her the ‘correspondence’ on the eve of a skirmish with about thirty bandits that had been pillaging several small villages deep in her lake area of Trikru. She had about fifty of her gona (warriors) with her that day, but she forbade them from confronting the bandits that had holed themselves up in an old bunker.

In her sorrow and rage at her friend’s death, she had needed an outlet for her despair. She had dropped down into that bunker alone despite the protestations from Anya and Gustus. She didn’t care. She was feeling reckless at the same time as feeling invincible, and invincible she was that day. The battle had raged on for a mere twenty minutes that day, and it had taken everything in Anya and Gustus to keep themselves from interfering as they heard the clashing of swords, the screams and yells, and the sounds of death coming from below them, but they had been issued an order by their Heda. It didn’t matter that Gustus was her bodyguard and Anya her general. An order from Heda was absolute.

Certain that their Heda couldn’t defeat so many people in battle on her own, they had even sent the messenger to Polis with instructions to prepare for a new Conclave. 

When Heda reappeared from the bunker moments later, she was covered in red and black blood and near collapse. She had single-handedly taken out every person in the group of bandits, most of them being alphas. 

Anya had made haste to send someone to intercept the messenger before he could reach Polis. Thankfully, he hadn’t gotten too far away. 

Heda had spent the next three days in her tent, recovering from her wounds and her broken heart. Gustus stood guard outside as Anya consoled the broken omega in privacy. Gustus told everyone who asked for an audience with Lexa during that time that she was in deep meditation with the previous Commanders. 

At the end of the three days, Lexa emerged from her tent looking as if she hadn’t just destroyed an entire faction of bandits all on her own. She looked as fierce and unflappable as ever, and every warrior took a knee before her as she passed them by. 

Clarke looked up from the card game she was enjoying with Anya, Bellamy, and Octavia. She was being trounced by Bell’s sister, and she was convinced that the young alpha was somehow cheating, but she let it slide.

It had been a while since she’d had much of a relationship with the girl, and she was only now rebuilding what she had almost lost with the other alpha. 

She was also enjoying spending time with Bellamy that didn’t always have them finding a way to keep themselves and all the other delinquents alive. She would almost call Bellamy her best friend, but Anya seemed to have snagged that title for herself. It was still odd to Clarke to watch the severe-looking grounder woman interact with Bell. She didn’t begrudge them the relationship, however. She was happy that the two had each other to confide in. They also seemed to have a lot of fun together which was something else that was hard to get used to, grounders having fun.

She was about to look back down at her cards when she saw Lexa walking with Prince Roan out of the compound. Curious, she excused herself and started to follow. It turned out that Roan seemed to be a good guy, but it didn’t mean she trusted him when it came to her mate. 

Anya had also noticed Heda walking away with the man. She narrowed her eyes and made to follow, but Clarke told her she needn’t go after her since she already was. 

“You whistle like I taught you if something is amiss,” Anya commanded. 

“Yes, ma’am.” Clarke saluted.

“Call me ma’am again, and you will be sleeping with the fishes,” Anya threatened.

Clarke barked out a laugh. “How many times has Raven made you watch the Godfather movies?”

Clarke walked out of Arkadia into a thick copse of trees. She wasn’t exactly spying as she watched Lexa react with what she thought was a mix of awe and horror as Roan handed her mate a leather bag that contained a strange bone ornament. She simply didn’t want to interrupt their private conversation.

Along with handing Lexa the strange piece, Roan obviously said something to the omega that upset her because it had her scent flaring, and Clarke could smell her mate from where she was standing a good bit back. She was about to rush to her side, when suddenly a tall, dark-haired woman stepped out from behind a tree. 

If Clarke thought the emotions rolling off her mate were strong a moment ago, now they were off the charts. She watched as Lexa stood rigid, clearly full of surprise. The spicy scent of the alpha woman reached Clarke’s nose, and it instantly made her itchy. She didn’t like it, and she had to rub her nose to clear the smell.

She was just taking a step toward her mate when Lexa’s fist flashed out and smashed into the woman’s face, making the alpha stumble. The hits didn’t stop there. In a fit of rage like Clarke had never seen in her usually controlled mate, her omega pummeled the woman until she fell to the ground. Looking briefly at Roan, all Clarke could see was a smirk. 

“Lex, stop, please stop.” The alpha did nothing to defend herself. She only held her arms up to protect her already battered face. “Lex, it was the only way to keep you safe. My mother, she would have…” Lexa’s fist smashed into the woman’s face again causing a gout of blood to spill from the alpha’s nose.

Clarke didn’t like the way the woman said Lexa’s name so casually. She marched forward to where her mate was now straddling the woman and continuing to pound her. She let Lexa get in a few more hits, because who was she to interrupt her extremely hot mate while she was beating the crap out of someone who had clearly hurt her, and then she flooded the area with her pheromones. 

“What the hell is going on here?” Clarke bellowed.

Lexa took one last shot at the alpha’s eye before standing next to her mate. She was growling and angrier than Clarke had ever seen her.

Unconsciously, Clarke moved to stand in front of her mate. Lexa was still snarling behind her, but Clarke could tell that she was trying to get a handle on her emotions. It apparently didn’t help because Lexa moved and her fist shot out again, taking a potshot at an unsuspecting Roan. She hit him in the gut, and he doubled over.

“You told me she was dead,” Lexa screamed. Her eyes were filled with unshed tears. “You told me she was dead,” she said more weakly.

Clarke had, at this point, had enough. She amped up her pheromones making the other two people submit to her. “Someone better tell me what the fuck is going on before I destroy both of you for upsetting my mate.”

The woman’s eyes widened in surprise. Roan, who still had his neck exposed to Clarke, held his hands up.

“Clarke, this is my sister, Costia.” He looked far too amused at what was going on. “Costia,” he held out a hand to help his sister to her feet, “this is Clarke Griffin kom Skaikru, Lexa’s mate.”

Costia looked astonished. Ice-blue eyes looked directly at the omega. “So, you really did take a mate? I didn’t believe the rumors. You told me to be Commander was to be alone.” She looked almost hurt, and perhaps a little jealous.

Lexa let out a terrifying snarl. “And you let me believe you were dead, so jok (fuck) off Costia.” She spun on her feels and walked back toward the gates of Arkadia. “I can’t do this right now. I can’t even stand to look at you.”

Costia let out a small whimper.

“Who are you to her?” Clarke demanded. She took an intimidating step toward the woman demanding submission and answers.

Costia held her hands up, matching her brother’s position. “Look, Clarke kom Skaikru, I didn’t come here to upset Lexa, I came here to help.” Her voice held a tinge of defiance, and possibly condescension.

Clarke got in her face. “Help? Does what just happened look like helping to you?” Clarke clenched her fists at her sides. She wanted to strike the alpha, but Lexa had already done a good job of beating the arrogant alpha. Costia’s lip was split, her nose still dripping with blood, and her left eye and cheek were already darkening into an impressive shade of purple. The blonde would be surprised if the woman didn’t have a splitting headache, and as far as she was concerned, she deserved it.

Costia’s battered eyes softened. “No, maybe not. It didn’t go the way I thought it would. She didn’t let me explain.”

“Then explain it to me.” Clarke spat.

Curious eyes followed Clarke as she walked back into the confines of Arkadia with the newcomer. If she weren’t so concerned about how her mate was doing, she would have laughed when she saw Octavia smack Bellamy when he ogled Costia’s body.

Bellamy wasn’t the only one to stare. Several sets of eyes raked over the alpha’s body, and she would have sworn that Murphy drooled a little bit. Even Miller and Jackson looked at her with appreciation. It was surprising considering the state of Costia’s face, however, even with her Lexa-induced wounds, the alpha was still exceedingly pretty.

Clarke veered off in search of her mate as Roan led Costia to be checked out by Abby to make sure nothing had been broken when Lexa’s fist hit her face repeatedly.

Clarke used her nose to follow Lexa’s scent. It was easy. She followed the smell of Lexa’s distress. She passed the cooking fires, and caught Kane, who was speaking with the ambassador from the Plains Riders, look at her then quickly look away. It was curious, but of no matter to her right now. She turned and headed up the ramp that led inside. She passed the door to Raven’s workshop. It had a ‘Do Not Disturb Unless You Want to go Boom’ sign hanging from the door handle. She also passed Sinclair who was fixing wires in one of the ceiling panels.

“Hey, Clarke, before you walk by, can you hand me that screwdriver?” He pointed at his toolbox sitting on the floor.

She silently handed him the tool. She was too distracted to speak to the man.

“If you are looking for your mate, I think she headed to your room. I’ve not ever seen Heda so upset.”

“Thanks, Sinclair.” Clarke smiled. When she had first returned with Lexa in her arms, she had been surprised that everyone in Arkadia had accepted Lexa so easily as their Commander. There were a few who still didn’t trust her, but overall, Lexa’s welcome had been warm. It certainly could have gone differently especially considering what happened at the Mountain. Even more surprising was that the fallen Ark was now the temporary residence to multiple warriors and ambassadors from the various clans. All had pledged their continuing loyalty to her mate and were eager to see her back on her throne. The residents of Arkadia were mostly happy to open their home to the newcomers.

When she arrived at their room, she could smell Lexa’s distress through the closed door. She opened the door slowly and stepped inside making sure to close and lock it behind her.

Lexa had changed and was curled on the bed. Clarke was happy to see that her eyes were dry, but they hadn’t been. She could see that they were red and puffy from crying. The blonde took in the sight of her mate. Curled on her side as she was, in one of the alpha’s oversized shirts, she looked extraordinarily young. All traces of the hardened Commander were gone.

Clarke didn’t say anything at first. She shucked off her shoes, stripped off her clothes until she was only in her breast binding and boy shorts, and climbed behind her mate, pulling her close as soon as she could. She started to purr.

She held onto Lexa, offering comfort until the omega was ready to speak.

“Did Costia tell you everything?” Lexa asked, and Clarke was impressed that her mate knew that the alpha wouldn’t let the formerly dead alpha get away without an explanation. 

“She did,” Clarke said.

Lexa rolled over to face the blonde. “Klark, you need to know that there was never anything between us.”

“I know, hodnes, although she did admit that she had a thing for you.” Clarke had been none too pleased about that.

“Is she still alive after telling you that?” She gave Clarke weak smile that didn’t reach her eyes.

“She is. I wanted to punch her, but you’d already done a number on her face, so…”

“I didn’t know she liked me like that,” Lexa said flatly.

“I know. She told me she never admitted her feelings to you,” Clarke leaned into kiss Lexa’s forehead, “and I may have threatened to rip her throat out if she ever did.” 

Lexa gave a wet chuckle. Clarke pulled Lexa in again. “I know how much it must hurt to know that she’s been alive all this time.”

The omega’s voice hitched. “You have no idea, but having you here helps.” Lexa shifted in the bed. “Since she’s alive, whose head was it that I found in my bed, and why didn’t Nia deny it when I accused her of killing her own daughter?”

“I think it’s probably best if I let her explain. It’s a story that only she can tell.”

“I understand.” Lexa rested her head in the crook of Clarke’s neck. “Where is she now?”

“She’s with my mom making sure that you didn’t break her face, although, I secretly hope that you did.” Clarke winked and Lexa shivered when the eyelashes cascaded over her cheek. “Maybe tonight you should talk to her.”

Green eyes searched Clarke’s face. “Will…will you come with me?”

“I wouldn’t miss it. Can’t have her making a pass at you and missing my opportunity to rip her throat out,” Clarke teased.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is just something about Lexa letting loose and taking out her anger and hurt on Costia instead of keeping it in that feels good. Dontcha think? They will still be best friends.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope wherever you are in this world that you are having a happy day. The events in my country have made it hard to focus on the real world, and that is why I escape to this one. It's good to get away, even if we have to let reality back in at some point, and that is why I want to give a shoutout to those of you who write and continue to expand this fictional world we all love so much. 
> 
> For so many of us, reading gives us solace. It gives us a chance to unwind and relax, and to forget about the things we want to forget about even for a little while. That being said, don't forget to remember the joys this world gives us. Go and enjoy them. Sit in the sun. Play in the puddles. Make snow angels. Sit under the shade of an ancient tree to get out of the heat. Live.

Chapter 8

Clarke and Lexa spent a few hours in bed simply holding one another. Lexa seemed to gain strength and comfort from this, and the alpha was happy to provide the love and care that her omega needed. She couldn’t imagine how it would feel to have someone come back from the dead.

If she were to find out that her father was alive, and had been hiding out, even if it was with the best intentions, she knew she would be hurt, angry, and basically inconsolable. All things considered, Lexa was holding herself together fairly well.

Lexa rose from the bed. Clarke reached for her and tried to keep her in place, but she wasn’t fast enough. 

“Stay,” Clarke whined. 

“We can’t. I need to know more about what’s going on and why Costia kept herself hidden for so long. She owes me an explanation.”

Clarke sighed and sat up. She pulled Lexa into her lap by the beltloop of the pants her omega had just donned. “She does. I don’t know if everything she did was worth hiding herself from you for so long but know that she really did have your best interests at heart.”

Lexa scoffed then turned herself in Clarke’s lap. She plucked a blonde curl from behind the alpha’s ear. “Your hair has gotten so long.”

Clarke smiled and pushed her face into Lexa’s hand. “And you are stalling.”

“You’ve changed since you were gone,” the omega said abruptly.

The alpha tipped her head. “How so?”

Lexa let the piece of hair fall. “You are calmer, and more willing to listen.”

Clarke huffed. She’d been a calm and willing listener before, hadn’t she?

Lexa stood. “I don’t mean that in a bad way, I just mean that before, you were so focused on the survival of your people that sometimes you didn’t take the time to listen to everything being said around you. You would make a decision, and then you would do everything you had to in order to get the result you wanted, and I am not saying that’s wrong. It’s just that sometimes you might have been able to achieve your goals faster if you had taken the time to listen.”

Clarke still wasn’t sure she liked where this was going.

“Now though,” Lexa went on, “you have a calmness to you. Something in you has settled, and, well, you have a wisdom about you that is beyond your years.”

Clarke snorted at that. “First, I am calm because you are with me. After I realized that you did what you had to that day at the Mountain, things did settle for me, and maybe I could have returned home then, but I had things I needed to work on first. Mostly, I needed to work on myself.”

The alpha got up and started to dress. “Second, I am far from wise. I learned that a lot about myself during my isolation, and I might have learned even more since finding you in the woods and knowing we have a pup, but I would not say that I have been instilled with wisdom. I’ve just learned that I need to take a step or two back sometimes and analyze what’s going on around me before I barrel into a situation.”

“Unlike most alphas I know,” Lexa said in jest.

“Ha ha.” Clarke stepped over to Lexa and helped her do up her multiple buckles and straps. It was with little surprise that Lexa was dressing as Heda to meet with Costia. The omega had been caught unaware earlier. That wouldn’t happen again. Even as she dressed, the mask of Heda was slowly slipping into place. It gave Clarke a thrill to watch her omega transform from the soft, almost fragile woman she was with her into the undeniably powerful Commander.

“You have a little drool on your chin.” Lexa said, noticing Clarke staring.

The alpha swiped at her completely dry chin. “If you are teasing me, I know you are feeling better, and I can’t help it if you are the hottest person to have ever stood before me.”

“Even hotter than Costia?” Lexa wondered. She knew the alpha was pretty, gorgeous even.

“Uh duh. She doesn’t hold a candle to you.” Clarke nipped at the mark on Lexa’s neck making the omega moan. “She’s not even close to being the goddess that you are, plus, she’s an alpha, so she stinks.”

Lexa chuckled. “What is Raven’s phrase? Flattery will get you everything?” Lexa smirked, feeling much better.

“It’s not flattery if it is true. I mean it,” Clarke looked seriously at her mate, “and I think most would agree with me. Haven’t you ever seen how the others watch you as you walk around outside?”

“They are looking at me because I am Heda.”

“That’s not all of it. Surely you smell the way the scents of the alphas change when you walk by. It even happens when you walk past some of the betas and omegas,” Clarke pressed.

“Now you really are flattering me.” Lexa rolled her eyes.

“I am not. You really haven’t noticed?” Clarke wondered. “Because I have, and I’ve even had to make a few threats.”

Bright green eyes looked up at her. “I’ll be honest. Since I got pregnant, the only scent that has called to me is yours. I hardly even notice the scent of others anymore.”

Clarke puffed up with pride. “Well, that’s good. I still notice them, but they bother me. They make my nose itch, and they make me feel hot and agitated, especially if they get too close to you. Even Doctor Jackson when he was treating you seemed like a threat. It was only after a long talk with my mother that I learned that this is normal. It’s my instinct to protect you even if you don’t need it.”

Lexa pulled Clarke in for a tight hug. “I love you, and I love that you want to protect me. The best way you can do that now is by taking me to speak with Costia and helping me finalize the plans to attack Polis. I don’t know how much longer I can survive without our pup. I need her, Klark.”

The pair made their way to meet up with Costia and Roan in the canteen area, and on the way, they bumped into Anya who was banging on the door of Raven’s workshop.

The copper-eyed alpha looked up at them with frustration. “Heda, I need you to command her to stop working. Ever since you tasked her with building your super weapons, she’s hardly comes out of there.” She banged on the workshop door, and they could hear cursing coming from within. The poor alpha rattled the locked doorknob. “See?”

Clarke chuckled. “Here, let me.” She patted each of her pockets until she found what she was looking for. She reached into her left pants pocket and pulled out a stiff piece of wire and a thin piece of metal. “My dad taught me how to jimmy the locks when I was little.” She took the two items and stuck them into the lock of the door. She fiddled with them for a minute until the lock gave a satisfying click. She turned the knob and opened the door with a flourish. “Ta da.”

Anya’s eyes were wide with awe, and Lexa’s filled with pride. 

“Your father taught you that?” Anya was impressed. 

“He was a man of many skills, and he taught me this particular one after I lost the key to our apartment and had to sit on the floor until he got home from work. I didn’t know then that I would be able to open almost half of the doors on the Ark then.”

“Handy,” Anya said. “Will you teach me?”

Clarke grinned. “Absolutely, but it will have to be later. Lexa needs to speak with Costia.”

Anya, who had been about to walk into the workshop stopped in her tracks. “Say that again, beja (please).”

“You heard correctly, Anya,” Lexa stated.

“Costia…who is dead,” the dumbstruck alpha said.

“That’s what I thought until this afternoon when she surprised me in the woods.” Lexa’s former anger was starting to show through.

“Costia. Costia who has been dead for seven years.” Anya was gobsmacked.

“Yes, that Costia.”

Anya let out a ferocious growl. “I will kill her for this.”

“Do the killing and yelling somewhere else,” they heard Raven bark from deep within the room. “I’m busy.”

“Reivon kom Skaikru, I command you to stop and eat supper with your mate. After that you will take the rest of today and tomorrow off.”

“But Heda, I am almost finished,” Raven cried out.

“No buts, Reivon. I issued you a command and you will follow it. The work is not going anywhere, and if you are almost done then this is the best time to stop.”

When Raven emerged, she had grease smeared across her forehead, and one of her eyebrows was singed. That’s not to mention the absolute rat’s nest that was her hair.

“Fine, but if we storm Polis and can’t get past the walls, it isn’t my fault.” She wrenched on Anya’s elbow. “Come on and feed me. If you are making me stop, then you are in charge of feeding my face.”

“I cannot. I need to go with Heda.” Anya replied.

“Clarke is accompanying me, General, I…I will be fine.” Lexa tried.

“Like hell you will. You are telling me that your best friend, that you thought was dead for seven years, is alive and well. You won’t be speaking to her until I punch her in the face. What possible reason could she have for faking her own death?”

Clarke grinned. Anya was almost as protective of Lexa as she was. “Your Heda already beat you to it. She almost destroyed Costia’s pretty visage.”

“You did?” Anya looked at Lexa and asked incredulously. The Heda she knew used to have more control, but she liked that Lexa had let it slip. Lexa nodded. “Then she is lucky to still be alive.”

“She did a number on Roan’s neck too,” Clarke couldn’t help but show her delight in her mate actions that day. “Practically lifted him off the ground with one hand when he told her Costia was still alive.”

Anya’s eyes were wide again. “Beja Heda. Please let me go with you. I want to see the bruises.”

Lexa chuckled and Clarke snorted. “No, Anya, but you can observe from a nearby table. We are headed to the canteen.”

Anya grinned like someone had just given her a new sword. Raven tugged her down the hall. “Let’s go scope out a good table. I want to see this too.”

When the mated pair arrived in the canteen there were only a few occupants. Jasper was one of them, but he took one look at Clarke and stormed off. She was going to need to sit him down and have a heart to heart soon. It still kind of pissed her off that he had forgiven everyone except for her. 

She felt Lexa stiffen next to her as the omega spotted Costia and Roan sitting at a table. The surprise came when Clarke’s mother stood from the table and rushed over to Lexa. She had a disapproving look on her face but didn’t immediately say anything. She grabbed Lexa’s hand and inspected it. The knuckles were bruised. The doctor poked and prodded at her hand then checked the other to make sure it too was okay.

She lifted a finger and pointed it at her daughter-in-law. “You are lucky nothing is broken, young lady. You are also lucky that you didn’t do any serious damage to that charming woman over there. I understand that there’s more going on than I am privy too yet, but know that if any more punches are thrown, I will put you back on bedrest until you are fully healed.”

With that the alpha stormed out of the canteen. When she was gone, Bellamy and Raven burst out laughing. “You may be Heda,” Raven cackled, “but until you are one hundred percent, Abby’s the one in charge.”

Lexa looked up and saw Costia and Roan grinning at her. She snarled and the looks of mirth fell. She clasped her hands behind her back as she strode purposefully toward them. She looked directly at Roan. “Leave. I want to have this conversation alone.”

“What about her?” He pointed to Clarke.

“Klark is my mate.”

He looked like he wanted to protest, but Clarke narrowed her eyes threateningly and sent out aggressive pheromones. The Azgedan alphas fidgeted under the subtle assault.

Roan stood and joined the table where Bellamy, Raven, and Anya were sitting. This seemed to satisfy Heda. It was far enough away that if they kept their voices down, they would not be overheard. The omega hoped that she wouldn’t lose her cool again.

Clarke took a seat opposite Costia, but Heda remained in standing at the head of the table. “Speak,” she demanded.

“Lex…”

The blonde thumped a fist on the table. “That’s Heda to you Costia kom Azgeda. You currently do not have the right to speak so familiarly with her,” Clarke warned.

Costia looked surprised at Clarke’s outburst but nodded her head. Lexa hid it well, but she seemed pleased by her mate’s reaction. 

“Moba (sorry). H-heda…I…I don’t know where to begin,” Costia fidgeted with the hem of her shirt. It was clear that the metal confines of the Ark made her nervous, and Clarke couldn’t fault her for that. Ever since coming back, the blonde alpha found herself longing more and more for her little lean-to in the woods. 

Inside Arkadia was noisy, and quite frankly, smelly. Most of Skaikru refused to sleep outdoors, so the sleeping quarters were cramped (Clarke and Lexa were lucky to have a room of their own). Climate control wasn’t fully functional yet, so it was often hot inside, and Clarke frequently felt like she was being steamed alive when indoors. She was damn tired of the heat outside, but more often than not, it was hotter inside. If not for her mother’s warning that Lexa was to sleep in a proper bed near medical, she would have dragged her omega to sleep out under the stars. 

“Start with why you let me think you were dead. It’s been seven long years, Costia. I mourned you like you were my own sister.”

The slight tick of Costia’s eye didn’t go unnoticed by either Clarke or the Commander. The blonde knew it was petty, but it made her happy to know that Costia’s crush went unrequited. She was honestly surprised that Lexa hadn’t fallen for the woman. She was astonishingly pretty, and she seemed to have a good heart. 

“Le…Heda. It’s a long story, but I will try to condense it. I know your time is precious.” Costia began formally. “First, however, please let me apologize. I never meant to hurt you, even though I knew it would. I was in an impossible spot and…and I didn’t know what else I could do.”

It began almost eight years ago after Costia had spent a long stretch in Polis under the tutelage of a weapons and beast master named Nix. For three years she had trained with the man, hoping to one day be a part of the royal guard to Heda, but the alpha’s mother, who always knew what was going on with her children, had found out that Costia had fallen in love with young Heda Lexa. 

As soon as the Queen found this out, she recalled her daughter to the Azgedan capital of Alb under the auspices of getting her ready to take over the throne. This couldn’t have been further from the truth, however. Costia had been home for no more than a day when her mother, Nia, approached her about the crush she had on the omega Commander of the Clans. 

First Costia tried to deny it saying that it was another person she loved, but Nia didn’t believe her, and the Queen brought her own daughter to her knees and made her submit and acknowledge her love for Lexa. 

From that moment on, Nia began scheming. She wanted Costia to win Lexa’s love, become her mate, and slowly take over as the Commander. Nia was convinced that once her daughter showed her domination over her omega that Costia would then be able to prove her worth as the next Heda. 

It was a ridiculous assumption on the part of the mad Queen partly because Costia was not a Nightblood, but mostly because she knew that Lexa would never accept her. To be Commander was to be alone. This had been ingrained into the young Heda by Fleimkepa Titus since well before her Conclave. It was expected that Heda Lexa would never take a mate. At least that was the thought. 

This didn’t stop Nia’s plotting. She was convinced that with enough training, Costia would be able to take advantage of Lexa during one of her heats and force her into being her mate. Through alpha dominance, Nia was convinced that her daughter would come to rule the Coalition thus giving Azplana her own foot in the doorway and allowing Azgeda to take over all the clans. The Queen seemed to have forgotten that Lexa had withstood the dominance of every Nightblood alpha during her Conclave.

“And how did it come to be that you had to fake your own death?” Lexa asked coldly. She wasn’t surprised that Nia had been plotting her downfall since practically day one.

“When Mother’s attempts to make me bow to her and do her bidding didn’t work, she started bringing in women who looked like you to show me how easy it would be to conquer you. She would seduce them into mating her willingly, mark them, and break them. She never let them bite her back, of course, because Mother would never let another claim her and take her power.” 

Costia shuddered. “When I still refused to do it too, she started bringing in women that resembled me. She had them tortured and would chain them to the wall of my room with no hope of breaking them free. I had to start sleeping on the floor in Roan’s room just so that I wouldn’t have to hear their moans of pain.”

Costia’s eyes began to water. “It finally became too much. I could no longer watch as she tortured and killed people in her quest to get me to do her bidding, so I begged for death. It would have been better than what she was doing to those innocent girls.”

Tears now slipped freely down the sable-haired alpha’s eyes. “Mother was happy to comply. She called me a failure and not worthy of being her spawn. She commanded Roan to kill me, cut off my head, and send it to you.”

A choked sob came from the other table where Roan sat. He may not have been able to fully hear the conversation, but by the look on his sister’s face, and by the tendrils of distress pheromones she was sending out, he knew which part of the story his sister had gotten to. It was Bellamy who leaned over to give him a comforting squeeze of the shoulder.

Heda’s mask had yet to crack. “So, who’s innocent head did he send to me?”

Costia lowered her head in shame. “I don’t know what her name was,” the alpha whispered. “Mother had killed her the day before and threw her in the pits for the dogs. She looked remarkably like me, so in the dead of night, Roan helped me escape, and then he cut off the girl’s head and shipped it to you.”

“You should have come to me,” Lexa roared, pushing the table and making it slide a few feet. “I could have helped you, protected you. I could have sent an army to Azgeda to stop your mother from hurting all those innocent girls.”

Sorrowful blue eyes looked up at Heda then. “No, you couldn’t have. The Coalition was still too fragile, and Mother had too many of the other clan leaders in her pocket back then. If you had attacked, her armies and those of her allies would have defeated you. She was still too strong then.”

Costia hiccupped. “You were my friend, and while I knew that it would hurt, I also knew you wouldn’t take revenge against my mother if you thought it was she who sent you my head. I knew…I knew your strength, and your mercy, would keep you from doing something stupid like attacking out of revenge.”

Clarke got to her feet to stand beside her mate. She didn’t touch her, but she knew being in closer proximity to Lexa would help calm her. Heda’s stance didn’t outwardly change, but Clarke could feel the omega taking solace in her closer presence.

The blonde alpha was in awe of her mate in this moment. She had never realized just how much Lexa had been put through before and after she became Heda. It was amazing to her that the omega had been able to carry on after everything, especially the loss of her pup, but if Lexa was anything, she was strong, and she was powerful, and she would never let the death of a friend, no matter how dear, lead her off the path of making things better for her people. 

“Why did you have to stay hidden for so long?” Lexa finally asked, voice cracking almost imperceptibly at the end. 

“I hadn’t intended to, but shortly after my supposed death, Mother got her hands on Ontari, and she did to her what she wasn’t able to do to me. She broke her Nightblood girl then put her back together again hoping to rebuild her in her image. I knew if word got out that I had survived and tricked her, not only would Roan die, but so too would anyone she suspected of helping us, and she would have let her newest alpha pet loose against us…and then you. I couldn’t risk it.”

Costia could no longer sit still. She stood and paced the floor. “It wasn’t until I heard that Ontari had killed Mother that I decided it was the right time to show my face again, but then I heard about everything at the Mountain, and then I heard the rumors that you were mated and pregnant. I didn’t know if the rumors were true, but I was so happy for you until I heard that you had to leave your mate at the Mountain in order to free your people. I knew what the Order would do, and I was right.” She paused in her pacing. “It was Titus that sent for Ontari. Apparently, he had always known of her, and since the rest of the Nightbloods are so young, he thought it best for Ontari to take over. No Conclave would be called because of the youth of the others. Everyone knew Ontari would win.”

She gave Lexa a pitiful look. She lifted her cup to her mouth and took several large swallows. Clarke hoped it wasn’t Monty’s experimental whisky that she was drinking.

“They imprisoned you, and there was nothing I could do about it, so I started whispering the virtues of an alliance with Skaikru to all the different clans. Surely if they had been able to take down the Mountain, they could also take Polis back and rescue you. I travelled from clan to clan trying to convince them to approach the Skaikru Chancellor and make new treaties. I didn’t know if the rumors about Clarke being your mate were true, but I tried to find her too. She was too wily to be found.”

Clarke gave Costia a sheepish look. This part of the story she didn’t know. “It was all very slow going between trying to reach all the clans and keeping Roan informed of my whereabouts. It was only when I heard about your escape from the prison and Nyko’s death that I finally made my way here. I knew if you survived that you would find your mate. I knew too, that if Clarke really was your mate that you would both come here. I’m just sorry that your pup is stuck with that bitch.”

Clarke whimpered.

“Don’t worry. From what I have heard, Ontari has no use for pups. She won’t even bother with your child until she is old enough to use somehow.”

Lexa slammed her hand on the table causing Raven to spill the drink she was taking a sip from down her front. “She will not ever touch my pup,” Lexa boomed.

She looked to Anya. “I don’t care what Doctor Griffin says about my recovery. I want our armies ready to go in less than a fortnight. I will no longer stand idly by while that woman controls my city and has our pup.”

She turned and lifted a finger at Raven. “You have my permission to return to your work, but spend time with your mate, and when she comes to get you to tell you it is time to eat or time to sleep, you will listen to her.”

“Yes, Heda.” Raven made a move to stand but Anya held her down.

“You have not eaten,” the alpha general said. 

“Fine, let’s go outside. I’m sure Octavia and Lincoln have cooked up something better than this slop.” Raven pulled at her mate.

Roan finally stood. “I need to apologize for the part I played in this. I never wanted to cause you pain, Lexa.”

Costia’s ice-blue eyes pierced Heda’s. “I am sorry too. I wish there had been a better way.”

“Me too,” Lexa whispered, and she finally made a move toward her friend and engulfed her in a crushing hug. “I am sorry I punched you.” 

Clarke could see Costia’s smile even as it was buried in her mate’s hair. “No, you’re not.”

“No, I am not.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am pretty far ahead in this story, so at least for the next few weeks I will be posting consistently on Thursdays and Sunday my time. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Know that I appreciate the kudos and comments. I love to read about what you thought.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I promised a Thursday update, and it is still Thursday for me, at least for a couple more hours. It took me so much longer to get to posting this than I had hoped. 
> 
> We will be seeing a new face in this chapter. Happy reading.

Chapter 9

The next few days were a whirlwind of activity, and Clarke could see the residents of Arkadia getting nervous with the new influx of Coalition soldiers into their space. Tent after tent was pitched on the high ground just outside Arkadia.

The blonde had been training hard with her seda while Lexa was training each morning with Indra. Abby wasn’t happy about it, but there was no denying Heda once she set her mind to something, so poor Doctor Jackson now had to sit in on every stretching session and sparring match, and even while Lexa sharpened her dual blades. Anytime there was even a hint of an injury, he was fussing over her like a mother hen.

Clarke found it all rather amusing which was good because now that the imminent battle was drawing near, she was getting more and more anxious. This was going to be a well-coordinated attack. Not that the attack on Mount Weather hadn’t been (or wouldn’t have been), it was only that this time, for her, the stakes were much higher. Her pup was inside the walls of a city she had never seen before, and it didn’t matter how many times she looked at the maps or the little wooden figures sitting upon them indicating who would be stationed where. She couldn’t get over the sense that something was going to go terribly wrong.

Lexa had caught onto her alpha’s nerves, and now each night after they both drank Abby’s warm herbal tea, Lexa would take her mate through meditation exercises as a way to get her to calm the jok (fuck) down. It didn’t always work, so sometimes they would end up in bed as a mass of tangled arms and legs instead. Not that either of them was complaining.

Clarke woke one morning after just such a night, and a sudden sense of calm had washed over her. She scented the air and she almost whooped with joy. 

“Lex. Lexa. Lex. Wake up.” She was bouncing on the bed she was so excited; all her nervousness forgotten.

Lexa grumbled. “It’s not even time to get up for training, niron. Go back to sleep for a while.” The omega pulled the pillow over her head.

“But it’s raining,” Clarke squealed. She launched herself out of the bed just as a rumble of thunder shook the creaky walls of the Ark. Instead of scaring the alpha, it excited her. She dressed in a loose pair of shorts and a tank top. She tugged on her immovable mate one more time then gave up. She went sprinting barefoot outside and into the pouring rain.

Fifteen minutes later, a mussy-haired Heda stood in the doorway as her ridiculous mate frolicked in the rain, splashing in puddles and making a thorough mess of herself while enjoying every second of it.

“Clarke come in before you catch your death,” Lexa pleaded, knowing it would do no good.

The alpha was the only person that could be seen outside. Even the grounders had had the sense to stay inside their tents. The alpha spun around, arms flung out wide, hair clinging to the sides of her head, and Lexa wasn’t sure if she had ever seen the alpha smile quite so radiantly before. 

Her joy was infectious, and Lexa finally wandered out into the rain. 

“Dance with me,” Clarke hollered over the noise of the rain. She held her arms out until Lexa was confined within them.

She spun her mate around then hummed a tune in the omega’s ear while swaying her hips. “I love the rain.”

“You won’t later when you have to slog through the mud it leaves behind,” the omega groused.

She ignored her mate. “The only thing I love more is you and our pup, and one day, you and I will dance with her just like this, and she will giggle and build mud pies, and she will get to be the little girl she deserves to be, and we will get to be the parents we want to be.”

Clarke stopped dancing and gave the omega a serious look. “You know, I never thought I would have someone who I loved and loved me in return, and I certainly never thought I would have a pup. If they’d never sent us down in the drop ship, I would be long dead, floating in the frozen depths of space.” She shivered, but not because she was cold. “Instead, I am here in your warm arms.” She spun Lexa one last time. “I’m the luckiest alpha…correct that…I am the luckiest person on the planet, and I can’t wait to see you holding our little Madi in your arms.”

Half an hour later, Lexa was standing under the warm streaming water of the shower with her mate. 

Showers were something new to the Commander. She had only ever taken baths in her lifetime, and while she longed for the giant tub in her rooms in her Tower, she couldn’t deny that there was something entirely too delightful about taking a shower with her mate. She also couldn’t deny its efficiency. 

She had already spoken to Jacapo Sinclair about how to get showers installed in her Tower once she regained the throne.

More and more, especially as her strength returned, she felt like the possibility of regaining Polis was a sure thing. She was gaining her confidence whereas her alpha seemed to be nothing but an anxious mess. The rain had lightened the blonde’s mood, but the underlying nerves were still there. She knew Clarke felt out of her depths. Her niron had only been on the ground for about a year and a half after all, and most of that time had been spent alone.

The alpha was putting up a good front, but small little cracks were beginning to show in her façade, and part of that was probably because Clarke had dedicated one hundred percent of her time and effort to her mate. Except for when they were training, Clarke was doing her best to make sure her mate was happy and comfortable. Without even realizing she was doing it, Lexa knew that Clarke also felt the need to protect her, and she tried to shadow the Commander everywhere she went. Her alpha had taken it upon herself to be Lexa’s new bodyguard, even though Gustus and Anya had that well covered.

Lexa knew it was in an alpha’s nature to provide for their mate, but she felt like Clarke was trying to make up for the time she had lost while she hid away in the woods. The omega also knew her mate blamed herself for what happened to her, and no amount of assurance could make her think otherwise. 

Clarke felt certain that if she hadn’t run away, she would have been able to change things somehow, and no matter how much Lexa argued that this wasn’t the case, Clarke was having trouble letting go of her regret.

What her alpha needed was to let go of herself for a while, and that was why, even though the march on Polis would be starting in a matter of days, Lexa was planning a surprise for her mate. It would be a simple night of fun where Clarke would spend time with her friends from the dropship, no grounders allowed. No Skaikru adults either. She wanted her mate to have a night where she could let her hair down and forget about what could have been. She needed her mate to forget about the past, if only for one night, so that the next morning she could focus on the future.

Lexa twisted an arm around her mate and turned off the water in the shower. 

“Hey, what did you do that for? We still had two minutes of water left.” Some things about the Ark would never change, and that meant water rationing for showers would probably be something that never went away. 

“I did that because we have both have a checkup to attend with your mother, and as I recall, she threatened to make you drink that broth you hate so much for a week if we are tardy.”

It was late in the afternoon when they left Abby’s office. They had stayed with Abby long enough to have tea. To Clarke’s horror, Abby decided to use that time showing Lexa pictures of Clarke ranging from when she was a baby to her early teenage years. 

Clarke had been an ungainly child. She had been clumsy, and keener to read than spend time with her friends. She had been teased mercilessly by the kids in her class who said she should have been an omega instead of an alpha. 

She hadn’t liked confrontation then, and for a while, she preferred her own company to that of other people. She was never one to attend parties or flirt with the betas or omegas. In short, she wasn’t the typical alpha.

The blonde didn’t enjoy flaunting her alpha side. Compared to most others on the Ark, she was a powerful alpha, but she never used it to her advantage. She hated watching the pissing matches other alphas her age would have to see who was the strongest. Because she would never participate, all the others thought her weak. 

The good thing was that she didn’t really care what anyone thought of her then. She knew how strong she was, and that was enough. She remembered a time when an alpha named Roma challenged her. She was the resident bully of her class. For some reason, Clarke had always been safe from her torment, but one day, during an Earth Skills class, the wicked girl made a point of picking on the blonde. 

At first, Clarke had been able to ignore her taunts, but then the girl changed tactics and focused her attention on the blonde’s best friend Wells Jaha. He was a shy omega who suffered regular torment due to the simple fact that he was the Chancellor’s son. He was usually good at ignoring the antics of such bullies, and he was doing a good job of it that day, but Clarke was not, and after a particularly harsh comment, Clarke snapped.

She stood up suddenly from her desk chair and flooded the room with pheromones. Every person in that room ended up on their knees, including their teacher, Charles Pike. The only person who didn’t fall to the ground was Wells. He sat grinning at her from his desk like he was the Cheshire cat. 

When Clarke realized what she had done, she was terrified that she was going to get in trouble. Not only had she made seventeen of her classmates submit to her, she also did it to her teacher. She stood trembling as she dialed back her accidental attack and waited for Pike to rise. She was certain she would be expelled from his class. Instead, he walked over and clapped her on the shoulder.

“It’s about time, Griffin.” It was Roma who got expelled from class that day.

“Is there a way for me to get one of these devices so I can have a few of these pictures?” Lexa asked Abby, breaking Clarke away from her memories.

“I’ll have to scrounge around, but I think I have Clarke’s old school tablet. I can transfer copies of these pictures to it,” Abby said with a grin.

“If you have any, I would like a few pictures of you too,” Lexa commented shyly, and Abby beamed at her.

“Of course. I would be happy to share a few.” She smiled at the omega. Abby’s fondness for her daughter-in-law was clear, but that had not always been the case. After the bombing of TonDC, she thought the omega ruthless and emotionless, and at one point Clarke had let it slip that Lexa believed that love was weakness. 

The doctor remembered thinking it sad that anyone could possibly think that, so she was happy to find that the omega had eventually had a change of heart, for it was clear just how much the Commander loved her daughter.

“Thank you, Abby.” Lexa looked down. “My nontu (father) raised me until the Order took me to Polis.” She pointed at the tablet. “I wish these things had existed before now. I wouldn’t mind seeing a picture of him. I was very young when they took me, and I don’t really remember what he looked like.” She sighed. “Anya told me he looked just like me, only with hazel eyes.”

Abby reached across the table they were sitting at and took Lexa’s hands in her own. “I am sure if he was anything like you are now that he was a lovely man.” Hesitantly Abby asked about Lexa’s mother.

Lexa drew her hand across a scar in the table. “She died in childbirth,” was all the omega said.

Abby stood from the table. She knelt in front of the omega. “I know she would be enormously proud of the remarkable young woman you have become.” Abby leaned forward so she could kiss the omega’s forehead. “Now let’s not think on troubling times. I understand you have a surprise planned for my daughter.”

Clarke’s eyes got big. “What surprise?” She had never been fond of surprises. 

Lexa was practically dragging her alpha down the hall. “Lex, I don’t think this is a good idea. I don’t need a night with my friends, I just want to spend a quiet evening with you.”

“Nonsense,” the omega protested. “Since we arrived in Arkadia, you have had little time to see your friends, and I know for a fact that they have all been asking about you.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “I doubt that. Besides, I have seen them all.”

“That may be, but you have not spent any time with them. You are their friend, and they would like to see you.”

“Then come with me,” Clarke pleaded.

Lexa shook her head. “Nope. It is not me they desire to spend time with. Besides, I have my own night of fun planned.”

Clarke quirked an eyebrow. “Let me guess, it deals with poring over maps and plotting the fall of the Usurper.”

The corner of Lexa’s lips ticked up at Ontari kom Azgeda’s moniker. “No,” Lexa drawled, “I plan to spend the evening outside with Gustus, Ryder, Tristan, and Indra. Since their return, it has been all business. I would like to sit around the fire with my friends and not think of the upcoming battle for a while.”

“Where will Anya be?” Clarke queried.

Lexa lifted on her toes to kiss her mate. “She will be with you…chaperoning.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Of course, she will.”

“Well, you are a bunch of delinquents,” Lexa quipped.

“Ha ha.”

They walked together hand in hand to an area outside. All the delinquents were waiting for them.

“Clarke,” Harper ran up and gave her a hug. “We saved you a cup of the good stuff.” Harper handed the alpha a cup of something strong smelling. She wrinkled her nose but took a sip. “Geesh. That could grow hair on your chest.”

Harper pulled the collar of her shirt down. “No hair there, and I have been drinking this swill for months. Tastes like acid, but it sure does make you feel good.”

Lexa leaned in for one more kiss before Harper could drag Clarke away. With twinkling eyes, she said, “Try not to drink too much. I have plans for you later.”

Harper grabbed Clarke’s elbow to bring her over to the rest of the group. “I still can’t believe the Commander is your mate.”

Clarke turned her head and watched Lexa walk away. The sun was just setting, and it cast an alluring light onto her mate. “Me neither.”

Harper nudged the alpha. “Come on, heart eyes. Everyone is waiting.”

Two hours later, Clarke was pleasantly buzzed. She had forgotten what it was like the spend time with her friends. Bellamy, Monty, and Murphy kept urging her to drink more, but she declined. Already Harper and Monroe were sitting together on the ground. The two were bleary eyed and giggling about something. 

Anya and Raven were sitting side by side. The mechanic was pleasantly tipsy and clinging to her mate, but Anya was as alert as ever. Her hawk eyes didn’t miss anything. Three times Murphy had tried to come and speak to Raven, but all three times Anya growled at him, making Raven grin. The omega may have forgiven him for shooting her, but her mate had not. 

“Geesh, She-Rah calm down. I was just going to offer to get the two of you some food before it’s gone,” Murphy grumped.

“John Murphy, are you insinuating that I cannot provide for my mate?” Anya’s lip lifted in a snarl.

In a bold show of affection, Raven leaned in to suck at the mark on Anya’s neck making the tall alpha shudder. Whispering into her ear, she said, “Give him a break, Ahn. So much has happened, and he’s trying to make amends. If I can forgive Clarke and Lexa for killing Finn, then you can forgive him for shooting me.”

Anya huffed. “You are correct as always, strik sora (little bird).” She stood up from where she was sitting and held her arm out for Murphy to grasp. “As always, Reivon makes a good point. If she can forgive you, then I need to as well but,” she squeezed his forearm tight, making him squeak, “if you hurt her again, I will feed you to the local pauna.”

He tried to get out of her grasp, but she held on. “I also don’t want to see you carrying a gun ever again, John Murphy. Instead, I will offer my services to you. You will come each morning and train with me and Clarke. I’ve still got a few days to show you how to use that dagger you are so eager to carry.”

Murphy’s shoulders slumped knowing he would not get out of training with the general. Raven stood and thumped him on the back. “Don’t worry, Murphy, I’ll make sure she goes easy on you.”

Clarke watched the exchange and hid her grin behind her fist. From the other side of the group, she saw that Jasper was watching as well. Since her arrival with Lexa, the beta boy had been avoiding her, and when she did catch his eye, he sneered at her. On several occasions, Clarke had wanted to approach him, but Lexa had talked her out of it. The omega told her either his anger would fizzle out, or it would consume him. Speaking to him wouldn’t make things better.

It hurt Clarke. She understood that it was her idea to irradiate Mount Weather, but Bellamy and Monty had been instrumental in making sure it happened. Those two had been forgiven, but she had not, and she didn’t think it was fair. Didn’t saving him after he was hit by the spear mean anything?

She was about to follow Murphy to the food table when Jasper approached her. Immediately her body got tense making the healing wound in her right arm twinge. Bellamy who was sitting beside her felt her go rigid.

“If you are here to give her a hard time, Jasper, then forget it. Tonight is about having fun.”

The beta shuffled on his feet. “I’ve been angry with you for such a long time, Clarke…”

Bellamy stood. “I warned you, Jasper. Leave her alone.”

The lanky beta held up his hands. “Let me finish.” He looked Clarke in the eyes. “I was just listening to Anya and Murphy, and if she and Raven can forgive him, I realized that I need to forgive you too. I know you didn’t set out to kill everyone in Mount Weather, and even though I still think I could have gotten everyone free; I realize that we still wouldn’t have gotten away. You did what you had to. I’m just sorry,” his voice hitched, “I am just sorry that Maya couldn’t be saved.”

He lifted his cup to his mouth and finished the drink in on gulp. Clarke was surprised that what she smelled was juice and not alcohol. She’d seen him consume an awful lot of the hard stuff since she had returned. 

He wiped a drip from his chin. “So, I want you to know that I am going to work on that…on forgiving you.”

“Thank you, Jasper, and for what it’s worth, I really miss you.” She gave him a weak smile. It was one he tried to return. “Do you think…can I have a hug?”

He gave a short chuckle and opened his arms. She held him tight for a few seconds before trying to let go and was surprised when he held on tight. “I’ve missed you too, Griffin.” He let go and walked away.

She talked and laughed with her friends for a couple more hours. By the end, only she and Anya were sober. Bellamy wasn’t too far gone, but he had a goofy look on his face as he watched a suddenly perky Monroe try to wrestle with Monty. It was like watching two eels trying to flop their way out of the hot sun.

Bellamy let out a bark of laughter when Monroe finally pinned Monty to the ground, but it died in his throat when his eyes were drawn to the front gates that were unexpectedly opening. He squinted his eyes to try and see what was happening, then abruptly got to his feet and sprinted away. “Echo,” Clarke heard him yell.

Who the hell is Echo? Clarke wondered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh oh. What is Echo up to? 
> 
> As always, thank you so much for the comments and kudos.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I posted the last chapter so late in the day last time, I am getting this one out early (for me). Sleep seemed to elude me, so I am up and posting. I admit I like the quiet hours where I am the only one awake. Only the cat knows I am in my writing nook already. Seeing the sunrise was a nice bonus to being awake already. I am sure I will be crashing on the couch for a nap later.

Chapter 10

Anya lifted her head from the bite of food she was about to take. When she heard Bellamy yell a name, when she heard Bellamy yell that name, she was up and sprinting after him, a low rumble in her throat.

She made it to the gates a split second after Bellamy, and before anything else could happen, she had the woman pinned to the ground. Pheromones were flooding the air, and the new arrival had her head tipped in submission and a look of hard resentment in her eyes.

“Get the jok (fuck) off me, mongrel.” The woman was struggling, even while under Anya’s dominance, to get out from under the alpha general.

“Anya, what the fuck, let Echo go.” Bellamy, who wasn’t immune to the general’s pheromones, was on his knees next to the woman on the ground. “Beja, Anya.”

She took her eyes off the woman below her to find her beta friend struggling to keep from having to use his hands just to keep upright in his kneeling position.

“Skrish, moba Bellamy. (Shit, sorry Bellamy).” She let up on the pheromones, but she did not let up from her position over the woman.

She was still snarling at the woman. “Echo kom Azgeda. State your business here before I tear out your throat, natrona (traitor).”

Echo was no longer being influenced by Anya’s invisible chemical attack, but she kept her head tilted to the side when she said, “General, I’ve brought survivors from one of the fallen sky ships.”

Bellamy, who had regained his feet was about to say something when Chancellor Kane and Abby arrived. 

“What is the meaning of this?” Marcus asked. 

“This woman is a natrona (traitor). She is a spy for Azgeda and has only ever been loyal to their queen,” Anya barked. 

“That may have been, but I was in the Mountain too, and Azplana (the Ice Queen) did nothing to help us,” Echo tried to explain. “When I tried to return home after being held captive, I was barred from entering the capitol. I’d been banished for my weakness…for being caught by the Mountain Men.” Sadness flashed over the beta’s eyes. “Alb (the capitol of Azgeda) is my home, and I am no longer welcome there or in any other Azgeda lands.”

“Where are these so-called survivors you speak of?” Anya asked without sympathy. She still hadn’t let up on Echo’s arms. 

“Their leader Charles Pike, and all the others are in a camp we set up about two miles away. We’ve been through a lot trying to get here. Many have been attacked and killed, so you can understand if they were disinclined to approach not knowing if they would be welcome here.”

“They are our people, of course they would be welcome here.” This came from Abby.

Kane placed a hand on Abby’s shoulder. “Anya, please let the woman up so she can speak.”

Anya let out a low growl. She didn’t like taking order from the Chancellor, but she was part of Skaikru now, and he was their leader, so until Lexa came to take over, he was in charge.

She grabbed the front of Echo’s shirt and hauled her to her feet, but in a matter of seconds she had the beta spy’s hands secured behind her back.

“You will remain secured and in my custody until Heda decides what to do with you.”

Now that Anya had a chance to take a good look at the woman, it was clear that Echo had suffered in her time as one of the banished. The beta was skinnier than the alpha remembered, and she was littered with scars and bruises. She turned the beta and inspected her hands. They were a battered mess.

She pushed Echo forward and forced her to sit over where most of the delinquents were passed out from drinking. She held a cup of water to the beta’s lips. “Drink,” she commanded, and Echo did. She swallowed the liquid in three desperate gulps. 

Bellamy was there with a pitcher to refill the cup. Anya let Echo have one more before taking the cup away.

“Speak,” Anya commanded.

Echo told them a harrowing tale. From the time of her banishment, she had been on the run because not only were disgraced warriors and spies exiled, they were also hunted. The instant someone was banished, Queen Nia would send messengers to all her villages with a bounty on the banished heads, and it would become a race for survival. 

Echo quietly spoke about how she had been stripped of her weapons and branded. Being unable to use her hands, she swished her head back and forth until her hair moved and an angry red scar on her right temple became visible.

“With this scar, no one in Azgeda would help me, and it meant I had to avoid all villages and people.” She shifted uncomfortably on the log. “Azgeda is a harsh land, General, even in the summertime.”

The beta dipped her head. It was clear she was hungry and exhausted, and probably in a great deal of pain. From the looks of her, she was telling the truth, but if Echo was good at anything, it was telling lies and making herself appear as something she was not. 

Betas, like Echo, made perfect spies. With their subtle scents and calm demeanors, they often went unnoticed in a crowd. They had better control over their emotions, and the good spies could mask their scents almost completely. Echo had the reputation for being the best. She could become invisible in a crowd, leaving her to sneak around and steal secrets.

“How do I know that you are not lying, that you are not here spying for Ontari and trying to get to Heda? We all know the Usurper wants Heda’s head on a spike.”

Echo hung her head in shame because it was true. She would never be able to outrun her reputation as a liar. “You can’t know that I am not lying,” she said softly. “I will only be able to prove that through my deeds and my actions, and I will swear fealty to Heda.”

Anya scoffed. “Your words are meaningless. Your loyalty lies only with your dead Queen and her Natblida.”

“My loyalty was to my Queen. I admit that, but she lost it when she treated me no better than a dog who soiled the rug. I served her my entire life. I gave up my chance at having a family, only for her to throw me away at the first sign of weakness.” The beta looked broken.

“And how do we know that your loyalty doesn’t now lie with the Usurper? How can I be sure that you won’t take the first opportunity there is to try and gut our Heda?”

Clarke, who had been silently watching since Echo had entered Arkadia, stepped forward, exuding threats of violence. “Because if she does, she will have to deal with me.” She knelt in front of the beta so that they could look each other in the eyes. She let out only a fraction of the power she was capable of, and Echo’s head snapped to the side.

The alpha lifted her lips into a menacing smile. “If you so much as blink in the direction of my mate, I will rip out your trachea, and then I will scatter your remains so far and wide that your spirit will never find rest. I am Wanheda, and I will not hesitate to make your death one of mine.” One mention of who Clarke was had Echo trembling.

Lexa appeared silently out of nowhere, making both Anya and Wanheda jump slightly. Somehow, she had already changed into her full regalia and warpaint. 

Clarke stood and bowed her head to her mate, as did Anya. “Heda,” they both said.

“Echo kom Azgeda, it’s been some time.” Lexa moved to stand in front of the bound and seated beta. She had a bland, almost neutral countenance, but Clarke was not fooled. She could feel her omega practically vibrating next to her. Be it anger, surprise, or something else, Heda was not happy with this new arrival.

Echo slid herself onto her knees and exposed her neck to the Commander. With eyes lowered to the ground, she said, “Just Echo. I no longer have a home.” It was said mournfully. 

Anya smacked the woman upside the head. “You will address Heda properly before speaking to her.”

Lexa raised her hand to stop Anya from hitting the woman again. “Em pleni (enough), Anya.”

Gustus and Indra, who flanked the Commander, looked like they also wanted to throttle the spy.

“B-beja Heda. I meant no disrespect.” Echo hadn’t lifted her eyes from the ground.

“You say you have been banished, and you even bear the scar to prove it, but there is no way for me to know that you aren’t loyal to Ontari kom Azgeda. There is no possible way for you to prove that to me.”

“Then let me prove it, Heda,” a very brave Costia stepped in front of the beta, blocking Echo from Heda’s view. “I’ve been in regular contact with Echo over the years. Yes, she was loyal to my mother, but she’s always been more loyal to me. When I had to fake my death, she was one of the people who helped me and Roan. She could have told Mother or Ontari about me at any time, but she didn’t.”

Lexa’s lips were drawn together. “Why would she do this for you?”

“Because she was to be my mate,” Costia revealed quietly. 

Clarke heard Bellamy whimper and wondered what that was about. She narrowed her eyes and focused them on Costia. “I thought you were in love with Heda.”

Costia held her breath then sighed, seemingly choosing her words carefully. “I won’t lie, I was, but Echo and I…we have known each other since we were small pups. We’ve always loved one another, but spies in Azgeda do not mate. Their loyalty to Azplana must be absolute, and that means having no familial ties that might distract from their duties to my mother. I may have had a crush on you Heda, but I have always been in love with Echo. We promised each other that if there was ever a way, we would make our union official. We just never thought it would be possible.” 

The alpha fearlessly took out a dagger and cut away Echo’s bindings, not waiting for the Commander’s permission. She pulled the woman into a crushing hug. Costia whispered into Echo’s ear, and Clarke could see the beta’s body shaking. The woman was crying. The beta’s battered hands clung to her would be mate.

“Shh, I’ve got you now,” Costia soothed, and Clarke was relieved. She knew Costia was no real threat to her relationship with Lexa, but it didn’t hurt to know that Costia and her crush were no longer an issue.

After that, there was a flurry of activity. Abby insisted that she needed to do a thorough exam on Echo after she was given more food and water. The beta had clearly been malnourished during her time on the run. She was underweight, and her cheeks and eyes were sunken in. She also had wounds that needed to be treated. The doctor needed to make sure she didn’t have any serious underlying conditions.

Only after Abby was certain that her newest patient was stable, would she allow Heda or her designate to interrogate the woman.

It was an hour and a half later that they learned that in her haste to make it out of Azgeda, Echo ran into the survivors from Farm Station, the part of the Ark that fell deep in Ice Nation lands. She admitted that she joined their group to hide herself from the numerous people that were out for the bounty money on her head. It was an astonishing sum. Nia enjoyed having her people hunted down, especially those who had fallen out of her favor. The queen knew there would be no small number of people who would try for the chance at such a large amount of money. 

As she traveled with the beleaguered group, she grew to respect their strength and will to survive. There were any number of hardships, and most of those came at the hands of Nia’s people. There were constant attacks, and a lot of people died. Only twenty-three people from Farm Station were able to survive. Some were killed, and others were captured. No one knew what happened to those people.

“Where are our people now?” Chancellor Kane asked.

Echo gave them the location, and a group from Arkadia gathered to go and bring their people home. It was decided that no grounders would be a part of that. Echo wasn’t sure how they would be received.

“How much have you heard about what has been happening?” Lexa asked. 

Echo, who was lying on a hospital bed because Abby insisted she rest, moved her hand to nestle it in Costia’s. The alpha refused to leave the beta’s side. 

“We heard a few snippets from the gona (warriors) that attacked. They taunted us, telling us that Ontari was the new Commander and that they would bring her our heads in a sack. They told us they had Lexa kom Trikru’s pup and that they would use it to draw her back into Ontari’s clutches.”

Clarke started to growl, as did just about every other person in the room. “My pup is not an it.”

“Moba (sorry), I didn’t know if the pup was a boy or a girl. I meant no disrespect.” Exhausted eyes found Clarke’s. “She knows you are coming,” Echo said tiredly.

“No doubt,” a now sober Raven chimed in. “If she was raised by the Ice Bitch, then she surely has spies and scouts. There’s no way they would miss the massive army just outside our gates. She’d be a pretty shitty wanna-be Commander if she didn’t expect an attack.”

“We have no doubt Ontari is expecting Heda,” Indra rumbled.

Echo’s eyes closed for a few moments. She was fading fast and needed to sleep. “She has no use for pups, but she won’t hesitate to use yours against you, Heda.”

“Then let me sneak back in. I can protect her,” a slightly high-pitched and squeaky voice said. Everyone turned their head. 

“Where the hell did you come from kid?” Raven asked.

Aden gave her a cocky grin. “I am Heda’s most promising Natblida,” he said only a little arrogantly, “and I have made it my mission to know every nook, every hiding place, and every secret entrance and tunnel in the Tower and Polis” his grinned broadened, “and now I know all the secrets here too. If I can get back into the Tower, I can try to protect Madi.”

Clarke had to give it to the kid. He had moxie. She also wondered what he had been up to. She hadn’t seen much of him lately. Maybe that was because he was finding all the Ark’s secrets. She’d have to get with him so that she could learn them too.

Heda put her hand on the boy’s shoulder and guided him in front of her so that the two of them could face Echo. She kept her face neutral, but Clarke knew her omega was proud of the young omega pup. “It’s true. Aden has been providing me with useful tidbits of information for years.”

The boy tipped his head up and back so he could look at Heda, but the pride on his face slipped away. “I just wish I could have helped you escape. The dungeon was the only place I couldn’t infiltrate. I failed you.”

Lexa squeezed the shoulder she was still holding gently. “You didn’t fail me. You have made me so proud.” She surprised everyone when she bent her head to kiss the crown of his head.

Echo lost her battle and finally fell asleep with Costia at her side. Lexa looked at her. “It’s clear we still have a lot to talk about but stay with your beta. She needs you now.” Heda turned to go but took one last look at the pair. “I am happy you have someone, lukot (friend).”

Costia leaned in and kissed the beta’s temple right on top of the angry red banishment scar. “Me to, Heda, me too.”

It was late at night, or maybe very early the next morning, and the rest of the group moved to a meeting room. The arrival of Farm Station and the former Azgadan spy threw a kink into their plans. There was also Aden’s offer to consider.

Abby and those from Skaikru, of course, were against sending a child into Polis with no back up. Aden was only twelve, and they couldn’t fathom such a young boy sneaking into the Capitol without help. The grounders merely grinned as Abby and Kane made their arguments against it. 

When they were done, Aden proved he was adept at hiding and spying. Most of those from Skaikru had thought the young boy asleep in his bed at this point, but with the gesture of Heda’s hand, he slid from the airduct above their heads. He landed nimbly on the floor and bowed.

“Ta da,” Raven whispered to her mate, making the alpha chuckle despite herself.

“How long have you been there?” Kane asked.

“Oh, only about two minutes,” Aden replied chirpily.

“We would have heard you,” Abby doubted.

Lexa gave Aden a look, and the boy silently spun and climbed back into the vent. Four minutes later he walked through the door of the room, surprising everyone. The Commander gave him a pleased smile.

“Did you hear that?” He asked, this time with more than a little arrogance.

After Abby and Kane admitted that they thought Aden was still up in the air duct, everybody reluctantly agreed that perhaps the boy could sneak back into Polis. They didn’t like it, but if he could get in and help protect Heda and Wanheda’s pup, it was worth the risk.

He would head out in the morning with Ryder. Once on the outskirts of the city he would be on his own. Before being shipped off to bed, Abby fussed over him, and insisted on personally packing his bag and getting him food for his travels. She made him promise no less than six times to be careful and not get caught.

He’d given her his best charming, boyish smile. “I will be fine, Abby kom Skaikru.”

Abby got choked up. She did not want to send the boy into such danger, but she conceded he might be the best hope of making sure her grandpup was safe. She pulled him into a hug then reached down her to her belt and handed him her shock baton.

His eyes got huge. He knew exactly what sort of weapon that was. “Keep this,” Abby said seriously. “It’s silent and won’t leave much of a mark if you have to use it, at least not one Ontari’s people will recognize as coming from a weapon.” She pointed to the dial on the side. “This setting will stun someone, but this one,” she pointed at the device, “this one will kill a person in only two seconds. Only use that setting if you must. You don’t even have to aim. Touch them anywhere on their body and the baton will do the rest.”

Aden looked to Heda before accepting the dangerous gift. She nodded and he took it. “Thank you, Abby kom Skaikru.”

“Just Abby.” A tear slid down her cheek and she ruffled his hair. “I expect to see you in one piece the next time we meet.”

“Sha, Abby.” 

The doctor was about to step away but thought of one last question to ask. “Was it Heda who taught you all the secrets of Polis?”

Aden shook his head. “Oh no, it was General Anya who taught me all of those.”

A chortling noise came from Abby. “It seems I need to have a conversation with Raven’s mate. I have a feeling she’s the one who has been stealing all my sweets without my knowing it. I’m betting she already knows the secrets of the Ark too.”

Aden smiled. “Who do you think taught me when I got here?”

Lexa and Clarke walked Aden to his room. He only had a few hours to catch some sleep before he left.

“Uh, Aden, can you tell us…do you know what our pup looks like?” Clarke asked almost shyly. 

The boy looked concerned for a minute, but then his eyes got bright as he looked from Heda to Wanheda. 

“Sha, she is beautiful and spirited.” He smiled as he thought. “She looks mostly like Heda with green eyes and wavy brown hair, but in her eyes, there are vibrant flecks of blue, and she streaks of blonde in her hair. She has your nose, Wanheda.”

Clarke slapped her hand to her mouth to cover the choke that escaped. Her eyes glistened with tears. When she looked at Lexa, she was no better.

“Wh-why haven’t you told us before what she looked like?” Clarke squeaked.

Wise blue eyes looked up at them. “Because I knew it would hurt, and I didn’t want that for you or Heda.”

“It does hurt,” Lexa admitted, “but now at least I have a picture of her in my head.” Her voice hitched. 

“I am sorry I didn’t tell you, Heda,” Aden said.

“I understand why you didn’t. It’s never easy to tell someone something that will hurt them but know what you told us today is a gift, no matter how painful.”

“You will hold her soon, Heda, I am sure of it.”

Lexa surprised both Clarke and Aden when she tucked the boy into his bed. She kissed him on the forehead and stayed with him until he fell asleep. She then walked out with her mate, and Clarke looked at her curiously.

“What?” Lexa wondered.

“It’s just…the way you are with him. I know you are going to be a wonderful mother.” Clarke took her hand and kissed it as they walked. 

“You will be too, Klark.”

Their night wasn’t over yet. The survivors from Farm Station were just walking, or being carried, into Arkadia when they stepped outside again.

To say the survivors were in poor shape was an understatement. The first person Clarke spied was Charles Pike, her former Earth Skills teacher. She ran up to him and lent him a shoulder to lean on as he limped into the Ark. 

Behind him was a woman Clarke recognized as Monty’s mother, and if the alpha hadn’t already known that, she would have from the piercing yell of joy that came from behind her as the omega saw his mother staggering in. Monty flew into his mother’s arms, and of course, tears were wept at the reunion. 

Jasper, who Clarke thought had no family, ran up to a slender man who looked just like him. “Dad,” Jasper whispered in shock as he saw the man. “Dad,” he yelled when the dazed man took a few seconds to realize that he was in the safety of Arkadia. 

“Jas, my boy,” the man fell to his knees and sobbed. “My boy.”

Jasper got on his knees and pulled his father into a tight embrace. “Dad, I’ve missed you so much.”

Several small reunions were made as the twenty-three survivors entered the Ark, but sadly, some reunions would never take place. Clarke saw Zoe Monroe and Harper crying in each other’s arms. They had already been informed that their loved ones hadn’t survived the trek from Azgeda.

Clarke watched on as her mother and Doctor Jackson ran around, tending to the injured. She knew that neither would be getting sleep that night. When Lexa, who was still wearing her long duster and pauldron, approached Pike and the other survivors, they quaked in fear. It was clear they had a healthy distrust of the grounders, and for good reason. If the people from Azgeda were all they had to go by, she knew it would take some convincing to make them realize that she and her people were not a threat to them.

“Charles Pike kom Skaikru, I am Heda Lexa kom Trikru.” She held out her arm for the man, but he did not take it. She tried again. “I want you to know that I will avenge the wrongs done to you.” She tried to soothe the man with her pheromones. “Those that hunted you are supposed to be a part of my people, but they have been led astray by an unfair and cruel queen. Those that hurt you and the others will be punished. This I swear to you. For now, know that the Queen is already dead. I know it won’t bring much solace, but it is a start.”

Pike spat at Lexa making her jump back before the wad hit her in the face. Instead, it fell and landed on her booted foot. “You think I would ever take the word of a grounder? I should kill you. I should kill all of you,” he yelled.

Unable to help herself, Clarke roared and jumped in front of her mate. Snarling, she grabbed the man by the collar, lifting him until only his toes touched the ground. “Threaten my mate again, and I will end you. Do you understand me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot happened this chapter. We had Echo, sneaky little Aden, and even the arrival of Charles Pike. Think Clarke's going to end up kicking his ass? Will he be good or bad? So many questions. 
> 
> If you enjoyed this, please leave a kudos or comment. I love hearing from all of you.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got out of work early, so I get to post this earlier than usual. Happy reading.

Chapter 11

Clarke was growling at Pike, and Lexa couldn’t help it as she looked on in awe at her mate’s unusual show of strength. The brunette may be Heda, but she was also an omega, and she couldn’t help but preen at her mate’s protectiveness. She may also have been guilty of gawking, and maybe drooling just a little bit, at her alpha’s muscular arms as her mate lifted a man twice her size off the ground. 

She shook her head to clear the images of what she wanted her alpha to do with those arms later. “Klark, beja, put your teacher down.”

Clarke continued to snarl at the man. She lowered him to the ground, but she didn’t take her hands off him and reiterated her threat. “Do not threaten my mate again. I understand that what has happened to you is terrible, but not all grounders are the same, in fact, most of them are just like us,” She tightened her hold on his collar, “but if you can’t accept that, then I suggest you turn around and go somewhere else because I will not tolerate you or any others throwing a blanket judgment at them and treating them as our enemy.”

She finally took her hands off the man’s torn and tattered shirt, but she didn’t get out of his face. Clarke was still spitting mad, but she could feel herself starting to calm as she was enveloped by her mate’s comforting scent.

“Do I need to escort you to the gates, Pike?”

The man’s eyes had been lowered, but he lifted them when he spoke. “No, and I am sorry I threatened your mate.” He gave her an almost imperceptible smile. “I’m happy for you Ms. Griffin, and I trust you. You wouldn’t allow anyone into our folds that you did not trust.”

Lexa watched as her mate narrowed her eyes. It was clear that Clarke was trying to decide if he was being genuine or just paying her lip service. The omega was surprised when the man held his arm out to her. She grasped the offered forearm.

“Hed…ah. Um, Commander. I’m sorry I jumped to conclusions. It’s easy to make quick judgments about people sometimes. You understand.”

It was Lexa’s turn to narrow her eyes. She didn’t trust this man either. “I don’t, but I understand why you would judge us so harshly. I just hope that with time, you will come to see that my people are not a reflection of those you encountered in the Ice Nation.” 

She turned and walked away leaving her mate standing with her former teacher. When she got to where Ryder and Tristan were helping the injured, she pulled Tristan aside and instructed him to keep an eye on Charles Pike. Trust went both ways. Her people would have to gain the trust of those from Farm Station, but Pike and his people would also have to gain hers before she would let them out of her sights. She would not allow this new faction of people to put a kink in her plans to get Polis and her pup back, and if it meant leaving a battalion of her gona (warriors) behind to keep them in Arkadia, then she would do so.

It was an hour later, and they were finally lying in bed, exhausted. Lexa was gently teasing her mate about her overprotectiveness, at the same time, she couldn’t keep her hands off her strong alpha’s arms. She was still impressed by Clarke’s show of strength especially considering it wasn’t that long ago that the blonde had been injured.

“Lex, if you keep doing that, we aren’t going to get any sleep before we need to see Aden off.” The alpha rubbed her fists over her tired eyes. They blinked open and she squeaked when Lexa’s hand lowered to her crotch.

“Sleep is over-rated, hodnes,” the omega leaned in to nibble at Clarke’s collarbone, “and I can’t help it if it was a complete turn on to see you lift that man.”

No longer tired, Clarke rolled over and pinned her mate’s hands above her head. For a split second, she felt guilty. Her pup was far away in Polis, and they were acting like love-struck teenagers. She shook the thought away. If they let the thoughts of their pup consume them, they would get nothing done. It was of no use to constantly worry over something they could not change. They had made a plan, and in a matter of days, Lexa and her forces would be fighting for everything she had ever strived for, and there was no room for error or failure, because if there was, the consequences would be dire, and Clarke didn’t know if either she or Lexa would survive if their pup did not.

So, even though they took time out to tease, have a little fun, and be intimate, it didn’t mean that they had forgotten about their pup. The opposite was true. Their pup was never out of their heads, and Clarke was convinced that soon she would be in their arms.

A couple of hours later, the bleary-eyed couple was getting fussed at by an irate Doctor Griffin. “Did you two even sleep at all?” The woman actually stomped her foot at them making the two break out in a fit of sleep-deprived giggles, frustrating the poor doctor and mother even more.

Abby gave them a lecture about how they both weren’t fully healed yet, that sleep was healing and restorative, and they couldn’t afford to go into the next few days with fatigue-addled brains. She pointed a finger at her daughter. “So, you had better learn to keep it in your pants for the next two days.”

Clarke turned scarlet and Lexa had to hold her stomach when she started to belly laugh. The joyous noise rang out through the quiet morning air and the two alphas looked at the omega in shock. Neither had ever heard the Commander laugh quite like that before, not so boisterously and loudly. 

Not being able to help herself, Clarke started to laugh too, even though she didn’t know why she was laughing. All she knew was that it felt good. It had been a long time since she had laughed like this. Sure, there had been a few chuckles here and there, but not any belly aching laughs.

Eventually Lexa was able to control her mirthful outburst. “Moba (sorry), it has just been a very long time since I was lectured like that. Since becoming Heda, no one except for Titus has dared to do such a thing.” She grinned at Abby. “It’s oddly refreshing.” 

She suddenly became more serious. “Mochof (Thank you) Abby, for showing me what it is to be loved by a nomon (mother).”

The air filled with the rich scent of Abby’s happiness. She really did care for, and had even come to love, her daughter’s mate. She opened her arms for Lexa to walk into if she wanted, and she started to purr when Lexa did exactly that. Abby engulfed the shorter woman in her embrace. When she let go, she said, “When this is all over, I hope I hear a lot more laughter out of you. You grounders don’t laugh enough.”

Lexa’s eyes fixed on Abby’s. “We didn’t have much to laugh about before all of this, but I aim to change that. I want peace for my people. With that will come happiness and laughter.”

A little while later, Clarke and Lexa were crashing back into their bed. They had seen the overexcited and hyper omega Nightblood off. Aden had seemed so young as he walked away, but Lexa reminded herself that he was only a year younger than she was when she had taken the Flame. He was a capable young man, and while she feared for his safety, she knew he was an adept little sneak. If anyone could get into Polis undetected, it was him.

She’d had a remarkably hard time controlling her emotions when he’d walked away with Ryder, but she’d held in her tears. Walking back to their room, Clarke had gently teased her that she was becoming a sap. The alpha had then pushed her against the wall and kissed her all while letting her know just how much she liked this new soft side of Lexa. Unfortunately, Abby had caught them making out and sent them to their room with a warning that if they didn’t get at least a couple hours of sleep she would use her powers as a doctor to drug them into oblivion, forcing them to sleep until sun up the next day. 

She had walked away mumbling, “You two are as bad as a pair of rabbits.”

Clarke was just getting out of the shower when she heard a knock at the door. Lexa had already disappeared to go and speak to her men. She also wanted to stop by and have a word with the blacksmiths. There was a total of five men and their apprentices who had been charged with making new weapons and sharpening existing blades for the gona surrounding Arkadia. 

Lexa had personally wanted to deliver them breakfast. The men had been working nonstop to make sure her army was supplied with the weapons they would need to overthrow Polis. After that, she wanted to meet with Raven. The omega knew she had tasked Anya’s mate with making the weapons that would cause mass destruction to the walls surrounding her home, and now she wanted to get to understand said weapons better. She wouldn’t lie, she had a healthy fear of the armaments Raven was creating. It far eclipsed the fear she had of the Sky People’s guns. 

The knock came again, and Clarke was forced to wrap her body quickly in a robe and her still dripping hair in a towel. When she opened the door, she was surprised to find Jasper and his father standing there. 

“Uh, hi.” Clarke wrapped the robe more tightly around herself. She didn’t move from the doorway. “Is there something I can help you with?”

The man standing next to Jasper looked just like his son. He was tall and lanky, and his hair flopped into his eyes. “My son has something he would like to say to you.”

Clarke groaned inwardly thinking she was going to be barraged with angry words, that Jasper had decided that he didn’t have any forgiveness in his heart for her. Instead, he shocked her when he stepped into her space and pulled her in for a hug.

“I’ve been talking a lot to my dad,” the beta said, “and he made me realize something.” 

Clarke lifted her soggy head when he stopped talking. “And what was that?” she asked.

“I told him everything that has happened since we crashed to the ground, and he made me realize that without you, I would have been dead a long time ago.”

He stepped back from Clarke and unconsciously rubbed at the scar on his chest. “I would have died just days after landing if you hadn’t saved me after I got hit with the spear, and then you saved me and everyone else over and over again. I need to thank you for that.”

“You don’t need to thank me for anything,” Clarke said, adjusting the wet towel on her head. 

“I do,” he said, “I want you to know that I appreciate what you did for me…and for us, and Dad and I, we would like to join the fight when you leave.” He ran his hands over his shoulders. “We aren’t fighters, but we can cook, or hand out water, or help the injured. We will do whatever you want us to do.”

“Jas…”

“Please let us help, Clarke. I just got my father back, and I don’t want to lose him, and I know I could if that alpha is able to take control of the Coalition. He told me what those people in Azgeda are like, and if she’s like them, she will destroy what we have here. I want to keep this life. I like it on the ground.” He gave her a crooked smile. 

Clarke returned the smile. “Alright. Why don’t you two go talk to Indra. She will tell you where you are needed.”

Jasper shuffled on his feet again. “Uh, is there someone else we can talk to? That woman scares the shit out of me.”

Clarke laughed. “Give me a minute to get dressed. I will go and talk to her with you. She’s really not as scary as you think.”

“Yes, she is,” both men said.

The three of them walked through the camps set up outside of Arkadia. They weren’t surprised when they found Octavia training with Lincoln in a ring; Indra on the sidelines yelling instructions at them. 

They watched the duo fight for a few minutes, and Clarke couldn’t help but be impressed by how well Octavia could fight. She’d obviously dedicated a lot of her time to her training, and she was giving Lincoln a run for his money. He may have eclipsed her in size, but he was no match for her speed, and she had him on his back with a sword at his throat in no time.

Jasper and his dad clapped excitedly for the small alpha. Clarke watched curiously as the older man watched every move the girl made. For having just gotten to Arkadia, his interest in Octavia seemed awfully unusual. 

Jess, Jasper’s dad, was a beta, and his scent was mild and almost unnoticeable, but the second Octavia had Lincoln on the ground, the man’s scent suddenly flared. Jasper didn’t seem to notice, but Clarke’s keen nose did. She watched Jess as his chest seemed to inflate with pride for the young alpha. There was a soft crinkle to his eyes that spoke of a fondness for Octavia that he couldn’t possibly have yet having just met the woman the day before.

The wheels in Clarke’s head started to spin when suddenly something clicked into place. The alpha almost gasped. She was so taken aback by her new discovery that she completely forgot what she was doing, and she almost stepped right into the chest of a burly gona who was just walking by on the dusty path.

“Moba (sorry), Wanheda,” the giant of a woman said. She was quite possibly the largest woman Clarke had ever seen. She must hail from Boudalan (the Rock Clan). They were known for growing tall and sturdy men and women.

“The fault was mine,” Clarke stammered. “I wasn’t paying attention.”

The warrior woman tipped her head to Clarke and kept moving, and the blonde alpha quickly made introductions for Jess and Jasper to Indra. She then excused herself and ran to find Monty who of course was with Harper.

When she got to them, she was out of breath and had to bend over with her hands on her knees for a minute.

“Hey, Clarke, are you okay?” Harper asked.

“Uh, yeah. Would it be okay if I borrowed Monty for just a few minutes?”

“Sure,” Harper leaned in to kiss her boyfriend. “I was just about to go find Zoe anyway.”

Clarke watched as Harper walked away. She waited until she knew she was alone with Monty before speaking. 

She looked at the handsome Asian boy. “This is going to sound like a strange question, but does Jasper have a mother?”

Monty blinked in surprise. It was the last thing he expected Clarke to ask.

“Ah, no,” he said. “Jasper told me she died in childbirth. Why do you ask?”

“It’s probably stupid, and I’m hoping I am wrong, but I think…well that’s to say that I think Jasper’s dad could be Octavia’s father too.”

“What!” Monty yelled, and Clarke had to drag him to a deserted area behind Arkadia lest he draw attention to them.

“I’m serious,” Clarke said, and she told Monty what she witnessed at the training ring. “As I was walking away, I realized that her scent is just an amped up version of his. It’s almost exactly the same as his. I swear.”

“Now that you say that, I did think he smelled familiar, but I thought it was because he’s Japser’s dad, but Jasper’s scent is a little stronger and spicier than his dad’s. In all honesty, it’s pretty different.”

Monty ran a hand through his hair. “If this is true, then Bellamy isn’t the only one with a sister.” He started to laugh. “Jas is going to freak. He had a crush on Octavia for the longest time. It’s possible he was crushing on his sister this whole time.”

“Gross, Monty, and his defense, he doesn’t have a clue, and I could be wrong.”

She and Monty talked for several more minutes about how to approach this discovery. They talked about trying to get into his medical files and see if his DNA was a match to Octavia’s, but Clarke refused to do that. Medical files were private. They threw out a few other ideas, but finally they decided that she would simply ask the man. 

It wasn’t something she relished doing, but if he was Octavia’s father, the girl deserved to know. As she walked back to where she had left Jasper and his father, she decided that she couldn’t fault the man for staying out of Octavia’s life while up on the Ark. 

Having a second child would have meant his, Octavia’s mother, and Octavia’s death. All three of them would have been floated with no regard for Bellamy, who would have been left behind, or the tiny pup that Octavia would have been. Rules on the Ark were harsh, and the one child rule was a law that could not be broken. The resources on the Ark were such that it couldn’t support a growing population. As it was, it had barely sustained its citizens in the end. 

If Jess had come forward as the father, Bellamy and Jasper would both have become orphans, and life on the Ark was not easy for children without parents. It wasn’t that they would have been treated harshly, it’s just that the orphans on the Ark never had a true home. They would have been shuffled from dorm to dorm and then placed in low level jobs when they were old enough. Food rations for the orphans also weren’t very good. Bellamy and Jasper would have had an extremely hard life if Jess and Aurora, Octavia and Bellamy’s mother, had been floated. 

Clarke was certain it would have been hard for Jess to stay away from his pup, but she understood that it had to be done. It was just too bad that Octavia had to live under the floor for so long only to be caught anyway. Her mother was killed, but fate had saved Octavia that day, and Bellamy too. She wasn’t sure why the Council had decided not to float the siblings along with their mother that day. She was only glad that they didn’t. 

She found Jasper and Jess where she left them. They were speaking with Indra, and the Wormana (war chief) was happily giving them their assignments. It wasn’t everyday that she had people volunteering for the more lowly jobs that existed during war. She would take any help that she could get. 

“Hey, Jasper, when you are done here, Monty was looking for you. He’s down by the still.” Clarke and Monty had had to fabricate a way to get Jasper away from his dad.’’

Jasper rubbed his hands together. “That could only mean one thing. Our hooch is almost ready.” He started to skip away. “I’ll find you later, Dad.”

Once he was gone, Clarke walked with Jess for a while, making small talk. He was an easy man to talk to, and he didn’t seem to hold quite the same resentments as Pike did toward the grounders. That’s not to say he wasn’t spoiling to get back at the people who hurt him. He was.

When they were far enough from the crowd of gona, Clarke stopped the man. “So, I’m going to come right out and ask you something.”

“Um,” Jess said nervously, “okay.”

“Are you Octavia’s father?” 

Clarke watched as shock and terror took over the man’s body. He looked like he was about to run away. 

“Hey, it’s okay. We aren’t on the Ark anymore and things are different down here,” she tried to soothe.

“How…how did you figure it out?” 

“I watched as you observed her sparring with her mate. You had an undeniable look of pride on your face, and when she pinned him to the ground, your scent flared. You smell just like her.”

He looked down at the ground and kicked a small stone, watching as it bounced away. “I never wanted to abandon her, and I thought of her every day,” he found another stone to kick, “and I helped where I could. I gave up as many food rations as I could, and I snuck Aurora clothes and supplies whenever possible.” 

Clarke put an arm around the shoulder of the man. “You don’t need to explain to me. Did you know that I am a mother?”

Jess shook his head. “I didn’t. Congratulations.”

“I haven’t gotten to hold her yet. I’ve never even seen her,” Clarke lamented, “but I would do anything for her. Half of this war is to get her back into our arms.” Just as she looked up, she saw that Lexa was beginning to train in a far-off sparring ring. She smiled and pointed. “Heda is my mate, and our pup was stolen from her just moments after giving birth. I know it’s different, but I can relate to what you went through. I can certainly understand the pain you felt.” Clarke paused to look at her mate one more time. “You need to tell Octavia. She deserves to know. Jasper does too.” 

“I know, but what will the Council say?” He worried.

“Like I said, things are different, and while the Council still exists in some form, it is Heda’s word that is law, and she would never punish a person for having a child.”

Jess looked unsure. “I loved Aurora. There’s not a day that went by that I didn’t wish I could have been with her, and…and I really would like to get to know my daughter.”

“Why don’t you go and talk to her?”

“W-would you come with me?” He asked.

“I will if you’d like me to, and then we can break the news to Jasper that the girl he fell in love with when we first got down here is his sister.”

“Oh no.” Jess looked worried. “Does he still love her?”

“Nah, she’s mated to Lincoln now, and Jasper had a girl that he loved in Mount Weather. Did you hear about what happened there?” Clarke asked.

“I’ve heard some. They call you the Mountain Slayer and Wan…Wan…”

“Wanheda,” Clarke supplied. “It means Commander of Death.” She watched as his eyes got big and perhaps a little fearful.

“I killed everyone in that mountain in order to save our people. Unfortunately, it meant that I killed friends and people that tried to help us.” Clarke choked up. “Kids too.”

“That included the girl he loved too, didn’t it?” Jess inquired.

Clarke nodded her head regretfully. “It did, and I am not proud of what I did, in fact, I almost let it destroy me, but I would do it again to save our people and your son, and it’s why I will fight to get back Polis and my little girl.” She realized she was getting off topic. “What I am trying to say is that your son is no longer in love with Octavia. He never really was. It was just a teenage crush, and I think your son would really enjoy having a sister, and I know that Octavia would really enjoy having a family.”

“What about Bellamy?”

Clarke grinned. “I think he would also really enjoy having a family too if you will have him.”

“Of course. He’s Octavia’s brother, and he’s loved her and protected her better than I ever could. I would be honored to have him as part of my family.”

“Then go and talk to her, and then to Jasper and Bellamy. Like I said, life is different here. We have a chance at a better life, and we can’t squander the opportunities it gives us for happiness and family.”

“You’re right. I’m going to go talk to her now. Thank you, Clarke.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...uh...Jasper and Octavia are half siblings. How does everyone feel about that? We will find out exactly how Octavia feels about it next chapter.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

*Smack*

The sound of the slap resounded through the metal walls of the eating area of the Ark. 

Jasper’s father had unfortunately chosen to speak to Octavia during the busiest time of the day when most everyone was eating. He looked completely heartbroken, with his hand on his inflamed cheek, when the young alpha stormed away from him. He was completely taken aback when she suddenly spun on her heels to come back and bury her face in his chest in a fierce hug. Clarke could hear her sobs from all the way across the room.

“What’s that about?” Bellamy asked, concerned for his sister. The beta had decided to eat with Clarke and Raven since their respective mates were still on the training grounds.

Clarke hesitated. “Ah, it’s not my story to tell.”

Bellamy quirked an eyebrow at her. “What’s that mean? Just tell me.”

Clarke shook her head. “No can do.”

“Who is that man anyway?” Raven asked after popping a piece of fried potato into her mouth.

“Uh, well, that is Jasper’s dad,” Clarke informed. She wasn’t about to tell them who he was to Octavia.

“Huh,” Raven said, “I didn’t even know he had a dad.”

Bellamy went to stand, but Clarke reached out a hand to stop him. “I’m going to need you to give them a minute. I have a feeling they will be calling you over soon enough.”

Bell plunked back down onto the bench in a huff. He watched the man suspiciously as his sister continued to cry in his arms. He growled when the man affectionately pulled Octavia into a tighter embrace. 

Lincoln, always calm, sat silently with a comforting hand on his mate’s lower back. 

Bellamy fidgeted in his seat. “Clarke, tell me why she’s crying.” 

“Nope. Bell, it’s not my place. You will know soon enough. Just know that your sister is going to need you to keep a calm head, and she’s going to need your support.” She dug her fingers into her temples. She suddenly had a splitting headache.

“Damnit Clarke. I’m going over there.” He tried to stand again, but Clarke grabbed his knee in a vice grip.

“Sit down, Bellamy,” she commanded.

Forced to stay put, the beta watched in astonishment as Jasper walked over. His dad and Octavia spoke to him for a few minutes. Bellamy couldn’t hear what was being said, but he was not about to sit there when Jasper collapsed to his knees, taking Octavia with him. When Bellamy heard the words “I can’t believe it” being said over and over again, he finally struggled out of Clarke’s painful grip. He charged over when he heard Jasper whisper, “I have a sister.” It was said like a man who had just witnessed a miracle.

“What the hell is going on here?” Bellamy’s deep voice boomed. He knelt in front of his sister and swiped at one of her tears. 

“Bell. I…he’s…Jas…” Octavia could hardly speak.

The tall, lanky man walked forward and held out his hand. “Bellamy Blake, I am Jess Jordan. Jasper’s father…and, um, Octavia’s too.”

Bellamy smacked the man’s hand away and pulled his sister to her feet. “What the hell is he talking about O?”

“I…I…” She was still speechless. 

“What’s she trying to say,” Lincoln began, “is that this man is her father. Just like he said.”

Bellamy grabbed the man shoulders and shook him. “You’re lying.”

Clarke decided it was time to intervene. She didn’t want Bellamy to lose control. She didn’t like doing it, but she sent out just enough pheromones to give her words the authority needed to get Bellamy to listen to her.

“Let him go, Bellamy, and listen to what he has to say.”

“You knew about this?” The beta accused. He turned his head back to the man. “If what you are saying is true, why didn’t you come find Octavia before all of this.” He looked at his sister who looked confused, elated, and distraught all at the same time. 

“Because if I would have, I would have been floated right along with Aurora and your sister, and you and Jasper would have been orphans,” Jess stated calmly.

Bellamy was about to object, but Octavia stopped him. “Think about it, Bell. It makes sense, and why would he lie about something like this? Nobody would do that.”

Bellamy let out a low-level growl.

“Scent him, Bell.” Everyone was surprised when Lincoln spoke up. “His scent is almost identical to Octavia’s.”

Bellamy made an obnoxious show of doing just that, and then he froze. He sniffed again and blinked. He looked from Jess to Octavia and back again, and then he looked at Jasper. His eyes got misty. He had never known his own father, but he knew it wasn’t this man, and it made unreasonably sad.

“So, you have a new family now. That’s great, O, I’m happy for you.” He turned and stormed out.

Octavia made to follow him, but Clarke stopped her. “I’ll go after him. He just needs a few minutes to process what just happened.”

“And I don’t?” Octavia asked.

Clarke put a hand on the other alpha’s shoulder. “Of course you do, but you have Lincoln for that, and Bell, well he now feels like he has no one.” She looked out the door and saw her mate and Anya walking in. Everything in her had her wanting to go to her mate, but instead she told Octavia again that she would go after Bellamy herself. Octavia thanked her before the blonde alpha jogged away.

The alpha ran up to Lexa and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. “I’ll be back in a few minutes,” she said before sprinting off and leaving the omega watching her backside as she left.

“She’s got such a great ass,” Lexa accidently let slip leaving Anya and Raven in hysterics. 

Once Clarke got outside, it took her a second to find Bellamy. He was standing over by one of the guard towers, but just as she was about to go to him, she saw that her mother had beaten her to it. She wasn’t sure how her mom knew the man needed a shoulder to cry on, but the blonde knew she could count on her mom to help Bellamy, probably better than she herself could. 

She stayed out of sight and watched her mother talk to the upset beta. He paced and kicked at the fence, but eventually he calmed down. Clarke decided that she was not going to be needed and headed back inside to find her mate.

When she did, she found Lexa with Anya, but Costia and Echo had joined them. The beta spy had much improved. After a round of intravenous fluids, sleep, and a whole lot of food, she was looking much better although she still looked a little haunted. 

Clarke walked up and put her arm around her mate, Lexa raised an eyebrow at her. “I understand that you are responsible for the reunion between Octavia and her father.” By her icy tone, Clarke figured that the omega was not too pleased with her right now.

She cleared her throat. “Well…”

“Raven already filled me in.” Lexa cut her off sharply, “Octavia is one of my most promising warriors Clarke, but now look at her.”

Clarke didn’t, instead she dipped her head and pretended to be extremely interested in a stain on her boot.

“Hodnes.”

Clarke exhaled. The pounding in her head got worse.

“Hodnes, look at me.”

Clarke lifted her head slowly thinking that maybe she shouldn’t have interfered with Jess. Maybe she should have waited until after the battle to confront him with her thoughts that he could be Octavia’s father.

When her eyes finally met Lexa’s, her omega was smiling. The omega nudged her hip. “You are too easy to tease sometimes, Klark. Look how happy she looks. Her father and the boy, Jasper, look happy too. You’ve done a good thing by bringing this to light, niron.”

Clarke breathed a sigh of relief. She should have known her mate was teasing her. “Bellamy is not too happy. I think he feels like he might have just lost the only family he has left.”

“Baloney,” Echo chimed in, surprising everyone.

Clarke tipped her head at the spy. “How would you know?”

“Bellamy kom Skaikru rescued me in the Mountain,” she stated simply as if that explained everything.

Costia shuddered. Echo had filled her in on the horrors that went on in that horrible place. Clarke knew Echo had been trapped there, and it was suddenly becoming clear that Echo and Bellamy’s friendship went much deeper than she knew.

“Without him I probably would have died in there,” Echo admitted. “I may not be blood, but he will always be family to me.”

Clarke was surprised but happy that Bellamy had someone in his corner. “Since it seems I am revealing everyone’s secrets today,” Clarke said, not being able to help herself, “you should probably know that I think he has a crush on you.”

Costia let out a high-pitched growl, and Clarke almost laughed except it would have hurt her already pounding head. It was the cutest, most nonthreatening growl she had ever heard. One look at the mirth on Clarke’s face and the pitch of the growl lowered. It was suddenly directed at her.

Clarke held up her hands. “Sorry, I’ve just never heard such a cute growl before.”

Costia snarled, offended. “It’s not cute.”

Lexa chuckled. “It kind of is.”

Costia turned to Echo to get her opinion, but the beta was wise and didn’t say a word.

Clarke interrupted them. “Bellamy is an honorable man, Costia. He may have a crush on Echo but knowing that she is with you means he will never act upon it. In fact, I think he’s already moving on. I saw him eyeing up a girl named Gina just last night.”

The friends sat talking for a while at the table. Clarke was just thinking that maybe she should go back out and check on Bellamy when Octavia got up and walked away from her new little family. The young alpha was heading outside, so the blonde figured she was probably going to find her brother. By evening she knew that everything would be right in their world again. Now it was time to make things right in hers.

“Are the weapons ready?” Clarke asked suddenly.

Raven looked offended. “Of course, they are. I am the master of all things WMD (weapons of mass destruction).”

“I wasn’t talking about your weapons, Rae. I know yours are ready to go boom. I meant the ones the blacksmiths were making. Lexa brought the men breakfast this morning.”

Raven looked only slightly awkward when she said, “Oh.”

“They are ready, Klark, but that does remind me.” She looked at Raven. “If there’s a chance, I would like a demonstration of one of your weapons. Maybe one of the smaller ones if there is such a thing. Indra has reported an increased number of scouts in the forest, and I would like to give them a small demonstration of your abilities.”

Raven got a wicked gleam in her eyes. “Sha, Heda. I know the perfect one to use.”

“It needs to be tomorrow morning. We leave two days after that.”

Clarke pinched the bridge of her nose. It seemed like they were always two days off from heading to Polis. Two days ago, they were two days off from heading out, and they were still two days off two days later. She knew there were a lot of details that went into moving an army of a thousand men, but her mate needed to make a decision and stick to it. All she wanted was to march to Polis and get her pup back. Details be damned. She wanted this over with.

She almost snorted when she heard Raven say, “Aye aye, Commander.” Raven saluted and dragged her mate away with her.

The next morning Heda trudged out to a grassy field with a grumpy Clarke in tow to where the General, the Wormana, Gustus, and Raven were already waiting. Lexa scanned the trees and thought it pitiful that Ontari’s scouts were so pathetic at hiding. Or maybe that wasn’t it. Maybe it was Ontari’s way of letting her know that the Usurper had eyes everywhere.

Raven was awkwardly setting up a tripod with a long cylindrical tube on it. She had a huge crowd of onlookers behind her. Lexa’s gona had gotten word that she was going to demonstrate one of her weapons. Curiosity won out over discipline, and there wasn’t a single warrior out there who was training like they should have been.

The sable-haired omega kept muttering and fussing with her leg brace as she adjusted her weapon. It took her a few minutes longer to set up than she would have liked. Anya finally went over to pull some grass from the ground and move the dirt around with her foot to get the tripod level. She eventually helped Raven get her demonstration set up.

“SO, WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN IS…” Raven yelled, and Clarke, whose head was still pounding, went over to pull the protective headphones the omega was wearing off her ears so that Raven could hear herself talk.

“Sorry, so what’s going to happen,” she said with a normal tone of voice, “is that I am going to use this,” the omega waved around a remote she had in her hand, “to activate my Super Boomer.”

Everyone rolled their eyes at the name. Raven didn’t care.

“When I press the button,” she went on, “the rocket will launch and hit that big tree over there, and when it does, we will have enough popsicle sticks to last the Coalition a lifetime.”

Clarke sniggered when she heard Indra ask Anya what a popsicle stick was. By the blank look on her face, Anya had no idea.

“What if it misses?” Heda asked seriously.

“It won’t,” Raven assured.

“How can you be sure?”

“Heda, I have calibrated and recalibrated that weapon. The aim is perfect. Ai swege em klin (I swear it).”

Anya looked proud of her mate’s use of their language, and Lexa finally gave Raven the go ahead.

Raven put her earwear back on, and Clarke wondered why she got protective gear and no one else did. She suspected that Raven was wearing them just to look cool. The dark-haired omega went and fiddled with her machine one more time, looked at Heda to confirm she was ready for the demonstration, and depressed the small red button on her hand-held device.

The reaction was instantaneous. With a deafening whoosh, the rocket shot out of the tube and raced toward the tree. Everyone flinched and covered their ears, waiting for the tree to explode, but nothing happened. The rocket hit the tree with an impressive thud, leaving a dent in the bark, but that was it. 

“No.” Raven shook her head in disbelief. “No. That’s not possible.” She ran to the smoking tripod, confusion etching her face. “That tree should be a pile of sawdust.”

She looked at Lexa with misty eyes. “Heda, I’m sorry. It should have worked. I’ll go back and work on it.”

Lexa’s shoulders sagged. “It’s okay, Raven. We don’t have time. We will find another way to break down the walls.” She watched as Ontari’s scouts scampered away to go report to their false Commander.

Once back inside Arkadia, Raven was bouncing about. “Do you think they fell for it?”

Anya smacked her shoulder playfully. “Of course, they did. In Azgeda, seeing is believing. They will report that your weapon is a failure to Ontari.”

“Good.” Raven did a little jig. “I can’t wait to see the surprise on those fuckers’ faces when their paltry little wall goes boom. No one takes my Clarkey’s pup.”

“Don’t call me that.” Clarke snarled.

She looked up when Octavia rounded the corner with Bellamy at her side. They were both smiling, and Clarke was glad that they seemed to have worked out any differences they had over the ‘daddy revelation’ as Raven was calling it.

The young alpha straightened up when she saw her fos. 

“Report seken,” Indra barked at her. 

“It’s just like you thought, Heda. The scouts are running back to Polis.”

“Do you have anything else to report to Heda?” Indra asked.

“Ryder is back,” Octavia informed. “He’s pretty exhausted, but he said that Aden got into the city,” Octavia toed at the floor then straightened up, “or at least he thinks he did. He watched Aden disappear into a tunnel that he didn’t even know existed.”

Lexa’s smile was barely perceptible. “Good. I know exactly which tunnel you are talking about. If he made it into the tunnel, then he’s probably in the tower by now.”

“Let’s hope he doesn’t get caught,” Raven said.

“He won’t,” Lexa said. He couldn’t. If something happened to him, Lexa would never forgive herself.

Clarke, sensing her mate’s unease, put an arm around her mate. “That kid is smart. If he’s been avoiding detection for years, then I expect he’ll be able to continue to do so.”

She suddenly had a question. “Are there other Nightbloods in Polis?”

Lexa nodded in confirmation, although her eyebrows were pierced together in confusion.

“Then how did Aden get out, and they did not?” Clarke asked.

“You’ve heard this, Clarke,” Lexa pointed out.

“When? I don’t remember hearing about any other Nightblood except Aden.”

“It was while you were still in the hospital wing recovering,” Anya said. “I told you how I snuck in and got him out. We needed him to donate blood to Heda. You asked if there were other Nightbloods then.”

Clarke thought and thought, but she didn’t recollect hearing anything about the Nightbloods. She had a sudden fear that she was forgetting things.

“Give her a break,” Raven piped up when Anya and Lexa shared a concerned look. “She was pretty high on pain meds at the time. I have huge gaps in my memory from when Abby took the bullet out of my back. Mama G's meds could flatten a Pauna.” She looked at Anya. “I’m pretty sure you probably don’t remember everything you were told or said after your surgery either, like when you told me you had smooshy-whooshy lips that were so soft that…”

Anya growled. “I’ve never said anything like that.”

Raven cackled. “Only I will ever know if that is true.” She skipped out of the way when Anya went to smack her again. She blew her mate a kiss after she made sure she was out of Anya’s reach.

Clarke was growing frustrated. She ran her fingers roughly through her hair. “Why can’t I remember that?”

Lexa was starting to grow concerned too. “You know, I think maybe it’s time we go talk to your mother. Your stress and anxiety have climbed the last few days, not to mention that you still have that headache. Maybe that has something to do with your memory gaps.”

Clarke scrubbed at her face. “You stay. I know you still have things you need to do today. I’ll go find her.”

Anya watched as Clarke walked away. The younger blonde was good at hiding it, but it had been obvious to the general that the other alpha was starting to crack under the pressure she was feeling, and she couldn’t fault her for that. 

Clarke had spent an exceedingly long amount of time on her own, first when she’d been forced into solitary on the Ark, and then when she had isolated herself in the woods. There wasn’t a person alive who would do well with little to no human contact for almost two years of their lives. That Clarke had held it together for so long was astonishing to Anya. 

Since the dropship first landed, Clarke had taken charge and become a leader even when it was clear she didn’t want that. The blonde hadn’t known anyone on that dropship except for one boy, but still she had felt that it was her duty to keep the ungrateful delinquents alive.

From afar, Anya and her men had watched as Clarke took responsibility for her people. At the time, she hadn’t known that the alpha had spent a year alone in a tiny cell. When that fact had been revealed to her, she was even more impressed by the alpha. Even the strongest gona deteriorated under the stress of confinement, and to be confined alone, without any contact, usually caused one’s mind to break without hope of ever fixing it. That Clarke had chosen, once again, to be alone after the Mountain was something that Anya was certain would lead to the blonde alpha’s downfall. 

After search parties sent out by Abby and the Chancellor found no trace of Clarke, Anya was convinced that Clarke was dead. When she had turned up alive, with a nearly dead Heda in her arms, Anya knew then that the stubborn alpha was going to do great things. 

Now she wasn’t so sure. She hadn’t said anything to Heda, lest she worry the omega before the battle, but Clarke’s cracks had started weeks ago, or maybe they had started the moment the Skai alpha realized that she was a nomon (mother). 

To go from being isolated to knowing that she had a pup who she couldn’t get to would cause anyone an undue amount of stress. Having her friends and mate at her side may have helped, but in the end, it had masked the stress she was under, and Anya was impressed that Clarke was only now starting to show the effects of years’ worth of psychological trauma.

Anya looked at Lexa who was still staring at the empty doorway Clarke had departed through. Between the two of them, there was no stronger couple. Just as most alphas would have broken after what Clarke had been put through, most omegas would not have survived the ordeals Lexa had suffered the past year. The feelings of abandonment alone, even if she was the one to walk away, would have taken any other omega out in a matter of weeks. To have survived nine whole months in captivity while pregnant and without her mate spoke of an unheard-of strength. Lexa was just lucky that she had been trained to sustain such stress. Clarke had not, and now the general was worried that her seken might become a liability in this fight.

She stood up suddenly. “I’m going to go see Abby.”

Lexa had known Anya long enough to know that it was actually her mate that she was concerned about. She was about to speak when her fos (first) put a hand on her shoulder.

“Just let me go talk to her, kei (okay)?” Anya said.

“Kei, fos.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Clarke is starting to crack under the pressure of everything that is happening. It will come to a head next chapter, and then all will be good again...as far as Clarke's stress levels go.
> 
> Please, please, please everyone be safe out there. With my profession, I have been in the thick of things with this virus since the beginning, and I have seen what it can do, but this week it hit home. It came crashing through my door leaving nothing but devastation behind. All it takes is one little slip, so please stay safe.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Anya walked down the metal corridors of the Ark. It bothered her that no matter how lightly she stepped, she couldn’t move without her footsteps echoing down the hall. She was about to turn the corner toward the medical wing when she heard a mournful wail. She stopped to listen. She leaned against the wall but immediately drew herself back up, not liking the cold sensation of the metal wall as it seeped through her lightweight shirt. She heard another yell. It was Clarke.

The alpha picked up her pace and walked down a hall she’d never taken the time to investigate. It was part of wreckage of the Ark that no one used, thus she had ignored the secrets it might hold when she was covertly examining the rest of the monstrosity. When she got to where she heard the yell, she realized it might have been a mistake to ignore this part of the Ark for when she got to where Clarke was, she found the blonde in the middle of enormous space. The floor was made of wood that had been shined to a high gloss. There were different red and white lines in places on the floor, but Anya couldn’t make any sense of them. 

It was an unusual room, but what Anya found perhaps more unusual was that Clarke was surrounded by all sorts of balls, the likes of which she had never seen. There must have been over sixty of them, and there were balls of every size. Some were orange, while others looked to be made of red rubber. There were black and white checkered ones, and small white ones that appeared to be held together by red thread. There were fuzzy green ones and small rubber blue ones. If she were a pup again, it would be a dreamland, but it wasn’t because of the alpha who stood in the middle of them.

The balls were strewn everywhere, and Clarke was kicking at them angrily. A few of the smaller ones she picked up and threw at the wall, having to duck once when one bounce back at her head. 

The blonde alpha screamed and kicked at a different ball, sending it cascading into the wall opposite the alpha. One the young alpha squeezed so hard it popped. Anya wasn’t sure that if Clarke had a person to direct her anger at that she wouldn’t murder them on the spot.

She took a tentative step into the vast room, and it suddenly dawned on her where she was. She was in a gymnasium. She’d read about them in Old World texts. The picture she had built in her mind was nothing like what was before her, and she was surprised that the floating Ark would have such a space within it. She’d already been told numerous times that very little exercise was done while Skaikru had been stuck in space because there was too much oxygen consumption during exercise. So why bother building it? Maybe when the contraption was being built, the people didn’t realize that air would be such a precious commodity. 

“Clarke.” She said the name carefully, not wanting to startle the very clearly upset alpha. A ball went sailing. It was accompanied by another scream. The younger blonde hadn’t heard her, or she had and was ignoring the older alpha. 

“Clarke,” Anya tried again, and this time one of the smaller blue balls went flying toward her head. It was only fast reflexes that kept Anya from getting beaned in the head. She caught the ball in her hand. It was made of a thick rubber and fit nicely in her palm. She pocketed the item figuring no one would ever notice its absence. 

“Jok (fuck), Clarke. Be careful. You could have taken my eye out with that thing.” She might have liked the ball she had just stolen, but she did not like having it thrown at her head.

Clarke was looking in her direction, but she didn’t seem to see. She was staring right through her seda (teacher). Anya got concerned at how red and sweaty the woman was. 

“Clarke,” she finally yelled, snapping the other alpha out of her daze, or panic attack, or whatever the hell it was she was having.

Clarke blinked once, twice, and then one more time before realizing Anya was standing in front of her. “Anya, what are you doing here?” Clarke voice was raspier than usual, and Anya wondered just how much yelling the alpha had already done, thinking she was alone. Clarke absentmindedly looked at the ball in her hand, and then she looked around at the bouncy carnage around her. 

“I think the better question is what are you doing here?” Anya said.

Clarke looked down again at the ball in her hand. She halfheartedly threw it across the room. “I…I used to come here when I was upset. No one was ever allowed in here except on Unity Day. It was one of the many times my lock picking skills came in handy. I could sneak in here and spend hours in here with no one knowing.” Now that her hands were empty, the blonde didn’t really know what to do with them, she and let them fall limply to her sides. 

“Want to tell me what has you so upset?” Anya asked.

“I’m fine. It’s nothing,” Clarke deflected. 

“I think the balls would say otherwise,” Anya said as she used her foot to nudge a black and white checkered ball back toward Clarke.

The younger alpha gave Anya a hard look. She fisted her hands in her hair. “Look, I don’t know what’s going on with me, okay.” In a fit of anger, she slammed her foot into the ball Anya had just rolled her way and sent it flying. She spun on her teacher. “Ever since the Mountain, no, ever since we landed, I have been placed into positions that I didn’t want to be in. I’ve been forced to fight and survive in ways I never thought possible, and…and I’ve been forced to be an alpha in ways I didn’t want to.”

Anya didn’t understand, and Clarke knew it. 

“I don’t like being dominant, Anya. I don’t like having to use this strength I have to get things done.” Clarke pointed up. “Up there, I would rather read or play chess with Wells than show off my strength and stamina.” She walked over to a corner of the gym where a black leather, cylindrical bag was hanging from the ceiling. She lashed out at the bag and punched it with her left fist. 

She looked at Anya. “So much of what’s happened to me in this life has been unfair, and for the past two years I’ve either been completely alone or fighting for my life, and now I am finally ready to fight for the life of my pup except that the fight never comes, and the anticipation is killing me.” She sent a volley of punches at the bag. “That, or it is driving me insane.”

Anya watched on as Clarke beat the tar out of the heavy bag. She wanted to joke and tell Clarke that she wanted a bag of her own to punch and should go get John Murphy, but she feared a fist would smash into her face if she did that. Instead, she said something that was maybe just as stupid.

“You know, you and Heda really are the perfect match. You bottle everything up until you explode. It’s amazing to me. You two either need to start talking about your feelings, or you need to start fucking like rabbits and use up all your toxic energy because otherwise you are going to slip up when it really matters, and it’s going to be Madi who pays the price.” 

Anya easily dodged the fist that flew at her face. “Don’t do it, Clarke,” she warned with a low growl. 

Clarke tensed in front of her, ready to pounce. Her eyes had taken on a hard, unnerving glint. “Don’t speak about my pup. Don’t speak about her like I don’t know that one screw up by me could cost her her life. DON’T YOU THINK I KNOW THAT?”

Skrish (shit), here we go, Anya thought.

Clarke lunged at Anya, and the older alpha barely had time to move lest she get tackled onto the hard wooden floor. The younger alpha rounded on her, and the anger was clear on her face. She snarled at Anya and sent out a wave of dominant pheromones. Anya was honestly impressed with Clarke’s stance and power. 

She remembered thinking the same thing when they had fought at the dropship all that time ago after having just escaped from the Mountain Men.

“Clarke, you need to calm down,” Anya tried, but it didn’t work, and she knew she was about to be in for one hell of a fight. Maybe, she thought, it would help the young Skai alpha get the stress out of her system. Anya sure hoped so, because if it didn’t, it was likely that Clarke was going to have to sit out the battle, and she knew that would never happen, not without locking her up in a cell. With the look in the angry alpha’s eye, Anya just hoped that she wouldn’t be so badly beaten that she would have to sit out too.

Clarke launched herself at Anya, and it seemed every bit of training the older alpha had done with the girl had gone out the window. The angry and confused alpha came at her like a hellcat with fists and claws flying. It seemed that Clarke didn’t care how she scored a hit, so long as she scored one. 

Anya had no problem deflecting most of Clarke’s angry hits, that is until her foot landed on a small, hard, and dimpled white ball sending her crashing painfully to the floor. This time her reflexes weren’t fast enough, and Clarke was on her in an instant. The general got her arms up to defend against the rally of hits that came her way, but Clarke was able to get in several painful hits. Anya was just about to send out her own wave of pheromones hoping to quell the attack she was receiving when she felt a whoosh of air go by her face. 

Clarke, who had her red-rimmed eyes locked on Anya suddenly lost focus. The fist she had raised dropped, and she crashed down onto Anya, pinning her with her body weight. A narrow, metal dart with a fuzzy red end was sticking out of the previously out of control alpha’s neck. 

Clarke was unconscious, and Anya had never been so relieved to have a fight over with. She let her head thump to the floor then turned to see who had shot Clarke with a tranquilizer dart. It was Doctor Jackson, and he was alone. Anya was happy and surprised to find that her Heda was not nearby. She thought for sure that the Commander would have been drawn to the fight by her bond with Clarke. She was glad Lexa hadn’t come. She wouldn’t have wanted Heda to see her mate acting so out of character. 

Anya grunted as she pushed the out-cold alpha off her, making sure to support Clarke’s head as the unconscious woman rolled onto the floor.

“Thank you, Eric.” Anya was more winded than she liked to admit. A feral Clarke was something she never wanted to experience again.

He gave her a concerned smile. “I heard the yelling and figured I had better bring the dart gun. Things sounded a little out of control, and from the looks of the gym, they were.” He looked at Clarke. She was still sweaty and red, but her breathing, at least, was normal.

“What’s wrong with her?” He asked as he walked over. He knelt down and took the alpha’s pulse.

“Anger, stress, anxiety, fear. You name it,” Anya replied as she painfully got to her feet. She leaned over to pick up the little white ball that had been the cause of her fall. “What the jok is this thing?”

The doctor couldn’t help but take the object from Anya’s hand. “That is a golf ball.” He held the object up with his index finger and thumb. “I never did understand why we had them up there. It’s not like they recreated St. Andrews golf course when they built this place.” He inspected the ball in the light. “This little thing could have caused the downfall of the Ark if someone had decided to hit it into one of the windows.”

Anya had no idea what the hell he was talking about. “What is golf?”

He looked over Clarke. “Now’s probably not the best time to explain. Ask Raven later. Can you help me get her up? I think it’s probably best if we get her over to medical.”

As if she weighed nothing, Anya easily hoisted the limp alpha over her shoulder. “After you, Doctor Jackson.”

Clarke woke up with a splitting headache. She would have rolled her eyes if she knew it wouldn’t hurt. Her head had been hurting for days, only this time, the headache felt like the one she had after drinking too much of Monty’s moonshine. 

She rubbed at her temples without opening her eyes. She didn’t need to. As soon as she moved her arm, she felt the line of an IV move with her. She groaned. She was in medical. Turning her head, she opened her eyes and looked out the window. It was still light, but she had no way of knowing if it was the same day or the next. 

The chair next to the bed creaked, drawing her attention. She turned to find a not too pleased looking Raven sitting there. She’d been expecting Lexa.

“What happened?” Clarke asked. 

“Seriously,” Raven sniped. “You don’t remember practically beating the crap out of my alpha and a whole bunch of balls in the gymnasium?”

Clarke grimaced, and it made the side of her neck hurt. She gingerly prodded the sore flesh, and flashes of what she had done in the gym came back to her. Her face crumpled, but she didn’t cry. “Oh no. Please tell me she is okay.” She whipped her head back and forth, making herself dizzy. “Where is she? I need to apologize.”

“She’s rallying the troops with Lexa. It seems your little freak out made them realize what the stress of waiting was putting you through, so congratulations, we march to Polis tomorrow.” Raven’s voice was steely. 

Clarke started to pull at the IV in her arm. If they were getting ready to leave, she needed to be helping. She started to sit up, but a slender arm shot out and pushed her harshly back into the mattress.

“Oh no you don’t. You’ve done enough for one day, so you are going to keep your ass in this bed until Mama G or Eric says it’s okay for you to get up. Then you are going to grovel at my mate’s feet for attacking her.” Raven started to growl, and Clarke realized she had never heard the omega growl before, at least not like this.

“Know this, Clarke Griffin, if you ever attack my alpha unprovoked like that again, even if you are half crazy with whatever the hell that was, I will build a bomb so small that I can stick it up your ass and blow you to smithereens. Do you understand me?”

The blonde nodded her head vigorously knowing that Raven had the know how to follow up with that threat.

“Good.” The mechanic gave her a wickedly gleeful smile. “Now drink this damn broth I have been instructed to give you. This shit stinks, and I want it gone so that I don’t have to smell it anymore. How your mate likes this foul brew is beyond me.”

Clarke lifted her hand and accepted the mug. The contents were already cold. She plugged her nose with one hand as she used the other to tip the broth into her mouth. She almost gagged, but she drank the nasty stuff.

Raven laughed again. “No one said you actually had to drink it. I just know you hate it, so it’s my little way of punishing you for your bullshit.”

Clarke didn’t say anything. She wanted to be angry, but she couldn’t. She was still confused by her own behavior. For everything she’d ever been through, she had never lost control like that, and that is exactly what it was, a loss of control. 

All she knew was that for days, maybe even weeks now, she’d been a swirling mass of emotions that she couldn’t wrap her head around. During her time in the forest, she thought she had gotten control over the mess that was her feelings, but ever since finding Lexa and injured and lying on the forest floor, they had been building up and they had hit their zenith when she realized she was starting to forget things. Maybe her memory loss could be chalked up to the pain medicine she had been on, but it didn’t matter. It was the icing on the cake, and that icing had been made from fear, confusion, hurt, and rage. 

Someone had hurt her mate, and someone had stolen her pup. Having to bide her time while she and Lexa recovered enough to go get back what was theirs had obviously been enough to tip Clarke over the edge. 

She looked over at Raven who was now calmly filing her nails with a long, thin medical instrument that she knew wasn’t meant for that purpose.

“Is Lexa angry about what happened?” Clarke’s voice was quiet.

Raven huffed. “No, dumbass. She’s concerned. When she heard what happened, she came sprinting in here. You were still red and sweaty, but limp as a dishrag. She began demanding answers about what happened to you.”

“What did happen to me?” Clarke pulled at a loose thread on the blanket.

“To oversimplify it, you had a panic attack. Mama G said the stress of waiting was slowly eating away at you.” Raven lifted the file from her nail. “Do you think there’s a way to recreate nail polish? I would really like to see what my nails would look like painted red.”

“Raven.”

“Sorry.” Raven put the file aside. “When Heda realized that it was the waiting that was driving you to lash out at poor innocent balls and Anya’s face, she decided there would be no more waiting. She’s ready to go burn down her house, and it’s about fucking time.” She wiggled in her seat. “I can’t wait to see the surprise on their faces when the wall crumbles to dust right before their eyes.”

Clarke couldn’t find it in herself to smile at the omega’s excitement because her words had the burning bundle of nerves in her stomach lighting up again. 

“What if we can’t beat them, Rae? What if…what if…”

“Stop it before you get all worked up again.” Abby walked into the room. She looked both concerned and pissed. “You are one ‘what if’ away from not going tomorrow morning. As it is, I don’t want you attending this battle, but I know there will be no stopping you, however, don’t think for a moment that I won’t sedate you and make you stay if I have to.”

“You tell her Mama G,” Raven cheered.

“Can I please get up now?” The blonde fidgeted under the covers. “I need to apologize to Anya, and I need to see my mate.”

Abby pulled out a syringe and filled it with something. “After I give you this.”

Clarke growled lowly, not trusting that her mother wasn’t about to sedate her after all. “What is it?”

“Mostly B vitamins and a few other things.”

Abby didn’t bother explaining why Clarke needed such a shot. She jabbed her daughter’s arm. “Sweetheart,” she said gently, “you can’t let this happen again.” She set the syringe aside. “Even though you were knocked out, you blood pressure was still exceedingly high when I got here. You could have had a heart attack or a stroke.” 

Doctor Griffin leaned over to kiss her daughter’s cheek. “You cannot let this happen again. Not if you want to see your pup.”

Clarke ducked her head. “It won’t.”

Abby released Clarke from medical, and the alpha made a beeline for Anya and her mate. She lifted her nose to the air and scented it. She could smell the subtle scents of both women, but she didn’t need to follow her nose. She could feel approximately where Lexa was. It was like a there was a string tied to her heart that pulled her toward her mate.

She almost let her anxiety get to her again. There were so many things that she had felt during her isolation, and now she realized that one of those things had been the pull of her mate. She’d been either too angry or too new to her bond with Lexa to realize what she was feeling. She wanted to blame herself for the things that had happened to her mate, for not realizing that the pain she had felt while in the woods was Lexa’s pain.

She knew now that nothing would have changed, but she would forever regret running away. She steeled herself against those feelings. She’d been over and over what had transpired during those ten long months, but they were over and done with, and it was time to move on.

She let the invisible string attached to her lead her to her mate. Lexa was in her war tent with the General, Indra, and Gustus. All eyes landed on her when she stepped inside, and for maybe the first time, she felt small and insignificant in front of these seasoned warriors. 

She hesitated in the entryway, and then she got a look at Anya who had a long scratch running across her forehead and a small bruise below her right eye. She whimpered and stepped forward. Lexa looked at her expectantly, but it was her mentor that she walked to first. She only looked in her eyes for a moment before she tipped her head and exposed her neck as a sign of submission, but more importantly, as a sign of respect.

“Wigod op ai, seda. (Forgive me, teacher).” She kept her eyes fastened to the ground. She was thankful that she had run into Octavia and Lincoln on the way to her mate. They had quickly taught Clarke how to say the phrase in Trigedasleng. Clarke wanted her fos (first) to know that she meant her words when she said them. She really did want forgiveness, but she just wasn’t certain she deserved it.

She startled when long fingers lifted her chin. “There is nothing to forgive.”

Clarke lifted her own finger and traced the red scratch on Anya’s forehead, her eyes were filled with regret. “If you say so.” She didn’t know what else to say.

“I do. Now buck up. Tomorrow we march on Polis, and Heda needs you right and ready. It will take three days to get there. You need to be prepared for the long ride.”

Clarke looked confused. 

“You will be riding on horseback next to Heda as Wanheda,” Anya added

Clarke wanted to protest that there was no way she would survive three days on a horse, but she didn’t say anything. She’d already done enough. She would do whatever she was told to at this point.

“You are the Commander of Death,” Anya went on. “To ride side by side with Heda will buoy the gonas’ sprits. They will want to win this fight for you.”

“It will also strike fear into the hearts of our enemies,” Indra snarled. “Titus and Ontari don’t know what’s coming for them. By now their scouts have reported our numbers,” she smirked, “and the failure of Raven’s weapon. The scouts have probably also reported to the Usurper about you.”

Gustus chuckled, drawing everyone’s attention. “It’s true. They will know all about you now, Wanheda, but all they will know is that you are a skinny blonde who has a few newly acquired fighting skills. They won’t believe you are a threat.” 

Clarke’s heart thudded in her chest because it was true. She didn’t feel like much of a threat right now. Not after what had happened in the gym. 

Gustus reached into the pocket of his overcoat, and Clarke realized that she had never seen him without it on. He never seemed uncomfortable, not even in the heat of summer. He pulled out two small jars. Clarke had no idea what they were until he removed the lid from one of them, dipped a finger in and tapped the finger to the tip of her nose.

The blonde had to practically cross her eyes to see her nose. He’d covered the tip of it with a greyish-blue substance.

“Warpaint,” Indra provided unnecessarily. She had a wicked gleam to her eyes. “By the time we get finished with you, you will be the most terrifying warrior out there.”

The acid pit that was Clarke’s stomach grew and her anxiety ratcheted up again. For all her bravado, rage, and promises to tear down Polis to get to her pup, she now wasn’t sure she wouldn’t just stroll in there and get herself killed. She had taken a good look at each gona as she passed them on her way to the war tent. They were the real warriors. She felt like she was playing make believe. She was no warrior. She was just a girl who pulled a lever in the Mountain and killed a bunch of people. 

For all of Clarke’s anxiety, Lexa was finally feeling calm after such a long time. Battle plans had been made. This was something she knew. This was something she was good at, and she was finally doing what she was trained to do. She never thought it would be to fight against the Order and a new Commander; scratch that, false Commander, and she certainly never thought she would be fighting to get back into her own city, but that is the hand she had been dealt, and she was ready for this fight. She’d been spoiling for it ever since she woke up with Clarke at her side in the hospital bed. 

The omega’s eyes had scoured over every inch of her mate when the alpha finally walked into the tent. She’d been able to feel Clarke making her way to her, and she was glad her mate had finally been allowed out of medical. It had been exceedingly alarming when Octavia ran out to tell her that Clarke had lost control in the gymnasium and attacked her general, and then to see her mate after that, lying completely still in the hospital. Her heart had squeezed so hard that she every molecule of oxygen in her lungs had been lost for a second. She realized what it must have been like for Clarke to see her the same way. 

She felt like a bad mate for not seeing the signs of Clarke’s impending breakdown earlier. Sure, she had noticed the fine little cracks in her mate. It was why she set up the night of fun for the blonde, but she hadn’t realized just how much pressure the alpha had put herself under. She had to give it to Clarke, she was an expert at hiding her feelings. Hell, she was better at hiding them than she herself was, and Lexa was the commander of hiding her feelings…most of the time.

Looking at her mate now, she could see a new, large crack opening up right before her eyes. She felt Clarke’s spike of anxiety and doubt in her chest, and a split second after that, she could smell it. Sour fear and apprehension were wafting off her mate. For as strong as her alpha was, she was mostly untested. There had been a few skirmishes between the delinquents and her people after the dropship had landed, and then there was the battle for the Mountain, but all of that had taken place in the span of just over six weeks, and now after months and months of near total isolation, the blonde alpha was being forced into another battle. It was no wonder her mate’s outer shell was crumbling. 

“Bants osir (leave us),” Lexa commanded, waving her hand to shoo everyone but Clarke out of the tent. “Don Costia kom op hir naton (Have Costia come here tonight).”

After everyone was gone, Clarke looked uncomfortable. “You didn’t need to send them away because of me. I know you are busy.” The blonde was being uncharacteristically timid and unsure around her mate, and Lexa knew that in order to win the upcoming war then she needed to get her strong and self-assured mate back.

She took Clarke’s hand and led her to the chair that was serving as a makeshift throne. She pushed the alpha until she was sitting in it. She leaned forward and kissed Clarke’s forehead.

“You aren’t mad at me?” Clarke asked hesitantly.

“Why would I be, niron?”

Clarke honestly looked shocked at her mate’s lack of anger. “Because I lost control. Because I attacked Anya, because…because I am weak.” The alpha almost seemed to shrink in the chair.

Lexa growled. “You are not weak.” She grabbed Clarke’s chin and forced the alpha to look in her eyes. “You have shown your strength over and over again; first at the dropship when you won that battle against 300 of my men, and then at the Mountain when you freed your people from an impossible situation. Plus, there is not another alpha on this planet that could have run for almost an entire day with a full-grown person in their arms.” Lexa sank to her knees before her mate. “I can’t think of anyone stronger. Your strength saved me, and I will never be able to repay you for that.”

“Lex…” Clarke’s words died in her throat when Lexa turned her head in submission. “Lex, don’t. Please don’t.”

The omega only turned her neck further. “I am Heda, and I bow to no one, but I am also Lexa kom Trikru, and I bow before you now, Clarke kom Skaikru. I bow before you as your mate, as your omega, and I submit myself to you.”

“No, Lex.”

“I have failed you, Clarke. Your needs are supposed to be my own,” Lexa finally looked back at her mate, “and I missed that you needed me to help you.”

Clarke squirmed in the chair. 

“You let me release all my anguish, all my bottled-up emotion, but you’ve been holding all yours in. Let me help you release yours.”

Lexa ran her slender fingers up Clarke’s legs. The alpha’s hands shot out and halted the omega’s movements. 

“Don’t.”

“You’re right. Change of plans. Come with me.” Lexa seized Clarke’s wrist and pulled her to her feet. She pulled the alpha out of the tent and marched her through the camp, grabbing two swords on the way out without letting go of her alpha. 

Lexa stalked away from camp and Arkadia, dragging her confused mate deep into the forest. She took them to the exact spot where they had picnicked.

“Lex, what are we doing here? Are we here to have sex again?” For the first time since before the gym incident, Clarke let herself smile, and the omega was relieved that her alpha hadn’t completely cracked.

She laughed. “No. Maybe later. We are here to spar.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who has left a comment or kudos on this. Please know that each one is cherished.
> 
> I am so eager for Sunday to come. There is a HUGE reveal about the Order next chapter, and I can't wait to share it and see what all of your think. It's tempting to post it early, but I am going to stick with my schedule. It's been hard because I wrote the chapter weeks ago. I was able to get so far ahead, and then chapters 16 and 17 hit me like a ton of bricks. I am still trudging my way through 17 and it's almost defeated me, but I am going to wrestle it back into submission.
> 
> Thank you all for reading.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

“Spar?” Clarke shook her head. “No way. The march to Polis begins tomorrow, and I…I don’t want…” Clarke let her voice trail off. She let her eyes wander to the gurgling water, wanting to look anywhere but at her mate.

“Don’t want to what, niron?” Lexa held out a sword to her mate. She stabbed the tip of the it into the soft earth at Clarke’s feet when the alpha didn’t take the weapon. “Don’t want to fight because you are weak,” the omega taunted, “or maybe you don’t want to spar because you think I am the weak one. I am an omega after all.”

“Stop it. You know I don’t feel that way.” Clarke slid her eyes over to where her mate was standing. Lexa held her sword loosely in her grip, but the alpha knew it was a ruse. Heda was deadly without a sword in her hand. A loose, relaxed grip on her current weapon meant nothing.

“Then maybe it is because you know you can’t beat me.” Lexa raised an eyebrow waiting for Clarke’s response.

Clarke frowned. “I know what you are trying to do.”

“And what is that ai tombom (my heart)?” Lexa asked sweetly.

“You’re trying to make me mad.”

Maybe she was, but Lexa suddenly decided that it was the wrong approach to take. “No, okay, maybe, but what I am really trying to do is make you get rid of your self-doubt.” She absentmindedly started to swirl her sword around in the air. “I should have seen it earlier.” She took a few steps closer to her mate and froze when Clarke flinched. How quickly she forgot about her own sword play. “Moba (sorry).”

“No, it’s okay. You’re completely hot when you play with your toys,” Clarke said, and Lexa knew where she was going with the comment.

“We are still not having sex, Klark, if that is what you are suggesting.” Lexa got rid of the sword.

“I’d rather do that than talk about my inadequacies,” the blonde tried to joke.

Lexa held her breath and counted to five. “You have no inadequacies, only fear of them.”

With nothing to do with her hands, Clarke picked up the sword. “Of course, I have fear of them. We are marching to a city that I have never seen before to battle people I know nothing about except that they were powerful enough to lock up the most formidable person in the Coalition.”

Clarke jabbed the sword back into the earth, stabbing at a clod of dirt. “I realized when I woke up in medical that I’m afraid, Lexa. I am so afraid. What if we fail? What if you or Madi get hurt? I just got you back.”

Lexa moved to get closer to the alpha, but Clarke stopped her. “What if all I am is a liability to you? It’s my fault you got locked up in the first place.” All the doubts Clarke had started to swim through her head.

Lexa wanted to scream at her alpha. They had been over this countless times already. “I won’t do this with you again, Klark.” Her hand shot out and took the sword that Clarke was about to plunge back into the earth. “You have done nothing wrong. It was the Order’s backward and antiquated views of how a Commander should be that landed me in that cell. They subverted their own rules calling for Ontari to rule. Even if my imprisonment was just, which it wasn’t, placing her on the throne was not. A Conclave should have been held. Including Aden, there are seven Nightbloods in the city, and the Order denied them their chance to rule stating that they were all too young to participate in a Conclave.” 

The omega took the sword and flung it into the water. “Titus taught me that to be Heda was to serve the people, but in doing what he did, he only served himself and his beliefs. Aden is only a year younger than I was when I became Commander, so to say he is too young is skrish (shit).”

It had been Lexa’s initial intention to make her mate mad, but she was the one getting angry. Everything she had ever done was for her people. She had saved her people from the Mountain for fuck’s sake, but because she had gotten mated, because she had chosen to fall in love, and because she had gotten pregnant, she had been punished – severely, but that wasn’t the real reason she was punished, not really, it was just the excuse. The real reason she was punished was because since the first day after receiving the Flame, she had challenged the Order. She was not easily influenced by them, and she often threatened to out their most precious secret, a secret she was only privy to because Titus accidently let slip what he really was.

No one knew what her time was like in that cell, and no one knew the Order’s most sacred secret, but Lexa decided it was finally time to tell if for no other reason than to enrage her alpha enough to get the blonde to forget about her self-doubts. 

So, Lexa told her the story, starting with the Order of the Flame. She told Clarke what the order was made up of. 

Lexa looked around at the massive city of Polis. The streets were wide and full of fascinating and frightening figures, and the noise was so loud she found herself covering her ears a few times. As she walked, she smelled scents so enticing she wanted to stray from behind the back of her new fos (first), but other scents were so off-putting that she wanted to bury her nose in her sleeve. Instead, she walked behind her fos who was really just a teen. The teen’s name was Anya, and she was wise beyond her years. She carried herself like any adult, and she was the one who had taken Lexa from her home in a village deep in the south of Trikru.

Her fos was a fearsome warrior who had been instructed to collect Lexa from her father when it was revealed that she was a Nightblood. At the time, Lexa didn’t know what that meant. She didn’t know that her black blood was different from anyone else’s blood as hers was a peaceful village, and up until the day she was taken from her home, she had never seen scarlet blood before, not until Anya had sliced open her own hand to show her that it was different. 

Her father, Svart kom Trikru, had not argued with Anya and the gona when they came to take Lexa to Polis and the Order. He knew it was only a matter of time before the Order found out about his strik Natblida (little Nightblood), he was only disappointed that he hadn’t gotten more time with her. It was punishable by death to hide the presence of a Nightblood from the all-seeing eye of the Order, but that day Anya and her men had taken pity on Lexa’s father. Unbeknownst to the Order, they instead told the man to run and never return. The young, but powerful, alpha hid it well, but Anya took issue with how the Order treated the families of Natblidas, and she refused to kill someone for loving their child and wanting to keep them for as long as possible. 

They gave Svart twenty minutes to say goodbye to his beloved omega child, and the man had wept as he packed her a bag and gave her his most cherished possession. He pulled his dagger from its sheath and he handed it to Lexa. It was a simple weapon, with a worn wooden handle adorned with metal beading. It wasn’t the fanciest dagger the child had ever seen, but it was wicked sharp, and she’d seen her father skin innumerable rabbits with it. Without that dagger, there were times that they might have starved.

At the time, she didn’t know what was going on. She took the knife from her father and wrapped herself in the leather strap that was too large for her when he handed her the sheath that would keep her from cutting herself while she carried the sharp weapon at her side. 

She was scared. The young omega pup had never seen her father cry before, and the strange new people in the village frightened her. When Svart told her that it was time to fulfill her destiny as a Nightblood and go to the capitol city of Polis, she thought he would be going with them. Instead, he pleaded with her to be a good girl and do what the warrior, Anya, told her to do. He told her that he would always love her, and keyron (spirit) willing, he would see her again one day. 

He quickly packed his own bag and made to depart their home, but Lexa had latched onto his leg, crying about circumstances she didn’t understand. She didn’t want him to go, and she didn’t want to go with these strange and terrifying new people. He soothed his pup as best he could and promised that one day Lexa would do great things, all the while knowing that she would likely die when the time came for her Conclave. An omega didn’t stand a chance against the alpha Nightbloods. He made Anya swear to protect his pup and train her to withstand the alphas around her. He begged the alpha girl to help his daughter become the first omega Heda of the clans, and he was surprised when the alpha got on her knees and swore to him that she would dedicate her life to seeing Lexa kom Trikru ascend to the throne. That day, Anya kom Trikru swore fealty to the scrawny omega pup and dedicated her life to her. The other gonas, Gustus, Ryder, and Tristan followed suit and swore themselves to the pup as well. Lexa didn’t understand what was happening that day, but when the scary warriors all took a knee and exposed their necks to her, something in her stirred, something that had her puffing up her chest with pride, and something that she knew she would be able to use on other people. She didn’t understand it that day, but she knew that there was something in her that would inspire men to follow her.

After a traumatic goodbye from her father, Lexa’s protector, confidant, and teacher became Anya. The second they were out the Lexa’s village the alpha was already beginning the girl’s training. Anya explained what it meant to be a Nightblood, taught her how to fight and hunt, and instilled in the omega a sense of dedication to her people along with a distinct thirst for truth and honor in herself and amongst her companions. 

Unfortunately, once Titus and the Order got their hands on the young omega, they tried to undo much of what Anya struggled so hard to teach her young charge. Being an omega, even a Nightblood omega, they saw her as weaker than the alpha novitiates. They pounded into her that love was weakness, fearing that at her first heat, she would not be able to control herself and become pregnant. They taught her that dominance was power and that she would never be able to wield such power because she wasn’t an alpha. They tried to teach her that power was to rule with an iron fist, and she often wondered why they bothered if they thought she would never be able to hold such power to begin with.

Little did they realize that their ways only gave Lexa that much more determination to become Commander. She worked harder, trained harder, and fought harder than any of her peers to grow strong and become a master of everything thrown her way. Gustus and Anya became her constant companions and worked endlessly with Lexa to prepare her for her Conclave.

It wasn’t until the Order saw the strik (little) omega besting her contemporaries that they decided to change their approach slightly. It was agreed that Titus would take the omega under his wing. He would nurture her natural omega tendencies toward kindness and servitude. He would strive to take advantage of Lexa’s clear and vast intelligence, and he would take advantage of her obvious desire for a father figure in her life. 

The alphas could easily be pushed around and swayed to do the Order’s bidding, but not Lexa. While the alphas believed every word spewed by the Order; Lexa did not. She constantly questioned and fought to be shown evidence of the things she was told. It got so bad that Lexa often had to be taught separate of her companions, and more often than not, she was sent on missions with her fos just to get her out of Polis. 

When she was in the city, Titus seemed to favor her over the other novitiates, and he spent more time with her than anyone else. 

When she wasn’t with him or in the city, Anya was doing her best to help Lexa unlearn what she had been taught by the stuffy men and women of the Flame. Fortunately, Lexa was no slouch, she was exceedingly bright, and she saw through what the Order was doing, and it only made her work that much harder to win her Conclave.

It didn’t mean that she didn’t appreciate the time and attention Titus gave her. She had truly believed that the man cared for her. 

Even after she found out the Order’s greatest secret from him, she still cared for the man. 

It was just after Lexa’s stunning victory in the Conclave. In spite of her prowess and determination, no one in the Order ever expected her to win. They thought even the weakest alpha Nightblood stronger and more powerful than her. They thought an alpha could beat her on dominance alone, but after years of training, Lexa had become immune to the pheromones of the other novitiates. She just never let them know that. She’d pretend to be submissive, and she would pretend to bow to them. She had started doing it as soon as she realized the Order was trying to subvert her natural talent by assigning Titus to her specifically. It had everyone letting their guard down, so when the battles came with each alpha during the Conclave it wasn’t even a fight. She swiftly cut down her Nightblood brothers and sisters, people who she had grown up with but felt little for. They had never fully accepted her into their folds, so there was little emotion on display when she took out one opponent after another. Despite his surprise at her victory, Titus had been exceedingly proud of the omega that day. He was practically gleeful with the stoicism she showed while taking the lives of the alphas before her. He unexpectedly expressed to Anya that he thought maybe Lexa would be a good Commander after all.

The only Nightblood that Lexa had ever cared for was an alpha named Luna. The redhead was a loud and brash woman, but she held little desire to fight or rule. She was the only alpha who questioned the Order along with Lexa, and when it came time for the Conclave, the alpha ran instead of fighting. Search parties were sent out to bring the alpha back, but she was gone. 

Lexa had been saddened that day because she lost Luna’s companionship, but she was happy that she would never have to fight the only Nightblood friend she ever had. If it came down to a fight, Lexa was sure that they would not have been able to kill one another. After that, it took her years to find her friend, and that was only because Lincoln finally told her where she was. The man, whose beliefs aligned with Luna’s, had helped the woman escape, and she had started her own clan on a strange floating structure in the middle of the ocean. 

Clarke, who had been sitting patiently listening to Lexa’s story was getting agitated. From the get-go, her omega had been treated unfairly. At first, she had felt a flash of anger that it was Anya who stole Lexa from her father, but she realized that Anya had done the best she could for her that day, and not only that, but the alpha had also dedicated her life to the omega. How Anya knew then that Lexa would rise to do great things back when the wavy-haired girl was just a pup was beyond Clarke’s comprehension. She didn’t understand how Anya and the others were able to swear fealty to one so young, one so untested. 

What she wanted to ask was where Lexa’s father was. Had she seen him? Was he alive? She had so many questions about him, but she didn’t ask because there was one, more burning, question that she wanted to ask instead. She wanted to know what secret it was that the Order was keeping.

They had moved to sit near the water as Lexa told her tale, but when Clarke asked about the Order and their secret, Lexa got up and started to pace. 

“I know I made it sound like winning the Conclave was easy, but it was not. I was injured quite badly, and after being cared for by Nyko and the other healers, I was given something to help me rest. I was lying on my bed, feeling drowsy from the medicine I had been given when Titus walked in and dismissed the healers. He said he would watch over me. I watched as he pulled over a chair to sit at my side. His face radiated pride, and also concern, but I couldn’t sense his emotions at all, and that was true of all members of the Order. Not once since coming to Polis had I ever been able to scent one of the members. It was like they were inert, and everyone assumed they were betas who were able to control their scents, kind of like Echo.

It was funny, because in all my years knowing him, this was one of the few things I never questioned. No one ever specifically told us they were betas, it was simply the long-held belief the people held about the Order, but that night, while Titus watched over me, thinking me drugged and too dopey to listen to what he had to say, he told me their secret, and it took everything in me to lie still in that bed and pretend I didn’t hear.”

“What did he tell you?” Clarke was getting antsy, and she too was now pacing.

Lexa stopped her movement and faced her mate. “He said many things that night. He even said that he did care for me and thought perhaps I would be able to lead and join the clans, but what had me reeling was that he let slip that his people, the Order, they aren’t betas. They aren’t anything. They have no designations.”

The blonde was thunderstruck by this admission. She looked dumbly at her mate for a minute before she could wrap her head around what Lexa just said. “What do you mean they have no designation?”

“I mean exactly that, Klark. They aren’t betas, alphas, or omegas. They do not have ruts or heats, and pheromones have absolutely no effect on them. It’s how they have been able to influence the Commanders for so long.”

Clarke shook her head, trying to understand. “But how? Everyone has a designation.”

“Not them, Klark. He said that they are the last remnants of what people used to be long before Praimfaya ever happened,” Lexa explained.

Clarke still couldn’t fathom this. Even the history books on the Ark that told of the times from before the bombs never spoke of people who existed who didn’t have a designation. “It’s not possible.”

“It is, Klark, and it makes so much sense. The Order is strong because it can’t be influenced by alpha dominance or omega persuasion, and they use that to hold power over the Commander.”

“No,” the alpha still refused to believe it was possible. “If that’s true, then why not take power for themselves?”

“Essentially, they have, but there are only about fifty of them that we know of. If they exposed themselves, they know they would be eliminated. It’s why they have kept their secret. There are too few of them. It’s why they created the Order…as a way to hide themselves and keep their secret safe. They made themselves into a religious order and used people’s beliefs to maintain their power.”

“But how?” Clarke asked again. “How are they able to control the Commanders? I just don’t understand.”

Lexa beckoned Clarke over to her and had them sit. Pacing was doing them no good, and they needed to conserve their energy for the long march in the morning. “Two ways,” the omega said. “First, they threatened the former Commanders with exposing them as weak if they did not toe the Order’s line. They would show that the alphas could not make them submit, and thus, prove they are weak and incapable of leading. This would also prove the power the Order had.”

“And second?” Clarke asked.

“The Flame. I have done exhaustive research where I could, although the Order protects its secrets and archives well, but I learned that the Flame fundamentally alters the alpha brain when it is inserted. It makes them more aggressive, more dominant and willing to force submission, but it also makes them more pliable in the Order’s hands.”

Clarke growled. “If that is true, what did the Flame do to you?”

“Apparently nothing. It must not have been designed to work on the omega brain and why there has never been an omega Commander before. Until me, no omega has been strong enough to win the Conclave.”

Clarke was still growling. “If all that is true, why didn’t they eliminate you when you became Commander?”

“I believe they wanted to, but they couldn’t eliminate me because the people love me. I didn’t get their loyalty through submission. I got their loyalty because of my dedication and love for them.”

Clarke finally smiled. “They do love you. The massive army we are getting ready to move proves that.”

“It does.”

Clarke thought for a few more minutes. What Lexa had told her was a lot to ingest. “So, back to Titus and the Order. When they found out you were mated and with pup, that’s when they were able to strike you down. They were able to spin it as a weakness.”

“Precisely.”

Clarke took one look at her mate and saw she was becoming distressed. Her short answers were proof of that. “Hey, you are not weak, what they did was plan a coup. They had probably been planning it for years. They were just waiting for their moment.” She engulfed the omega in her arms and soothing pheromones.

“It wasn’t just that, Klark. When the Order stormed in with Ontari at their side, I could have fought them. I maybe could have won, but I didn’t resist because…because I didn’t want to risk our child getting hurt before she was even born.”

Lexa’s eyes began to water, but she didn’t cry. She admitted that she let them throw her in a cell in hopes that they would let her pup live. It nearly didn’t happen. They tortured her through starvation by giving her one meager meal a day, just enough to keep the pup alive. She was cold all the time. Every day, someone from the Order would come to her cell and taunt her and tell her that she was unworthy of carrying the Flame. They sent down alphas to try and make her submit, and they told her daily that her pup would be taken by them and indoctrinated into their beliefs. The child would be made a puppet to do their bidding. 

The only thing that kept her going was thoughts of her alpha, and her pup’s survival. Nyko’s visits had been vital as well. He was allowed to check on her once per week, under heavy guard, but still he was able to sneak her extra food. He told her of his plans to help her escape, and it was this that gave Lexa the little hope she had during that horrendous time. Unfortunately, she hadn’t been able to escape while still pregnant. The only way it was going to happen was if Nyko could get her out of her cell, and that would only happen when Lexa was about to give birth. Sadly, the birth was complicated, and Nyko had no choice but to operate with little time to spare if he was going to get her out of the city. He had no choice but to hand off the pup to Titus, and after Madi’s birth, Nyko was left alone with Lexa with instructions to remove the Flame and dispose of her body. 

Lexa never knew why he was left alone to take out something as important as the Flame, but she was thankful that he was, otherwise she would never have gotten out of Polis. 

Clarke crushed Lexa to her. “You are the strongest person I know,” she whispered, “and I am going to enjoy watching you rip the throats out of every one of those designation-less freaks. Their reign of power ends, and you will carry your people back into the light.”

Lexa hiccupped. “Our people, Klark.”

After the omega’s harrowing tale, Clarke made sweet love to her mate, and any doubts she had been having about going into battle had vanished. She was more determined than ever to see her mate lifted up and placed back on her throne. Lexa would be the Commander she was always meant to be and having their pup in her arms would only make her stronger. Clarke was more certain than ever that the people would never see omegas as weak again. 

When they arrived back at Lexa’s war tent, Costia was waiting for them with Echo at her side. Clarke smiled at them. It was clear they were dedicated to one another, and it warmed her heart. Lexa’s ordeal had been horrifying, but hers wasn’t the only one. Costia and Echo had lost much as well. They had even thought they had lost each other. It was good to see the women happy and together. 

They looked up when Lexa and Clarke walked in. Costia gave Lexa a lopsided smile. Her face hadn’t fully recovered from the beating it took. 

Lexa didn’t wait to begin speaking. “Costia, I need a favor, and it might be one you won’t like.” She grabbed Clarke’s hand. “Actually, I need a couple of favors.”

Echo narrowed her eyes at the Commander. The woman might be grateful that she was healing, and that Lexa was partly responsible for that, but she still wasn’t happy that the Commander had hit her beloved.

Heda ignored her. “Before we march, I need you to braid Clarke’s hair for me.”

All three women shot Lexa surprised looks. “Why aren’t you doing it?” Costia asked.

“Because you know that I have never been good at the complicated braids, and Wanheda’s plaits are even more complicated than Heda’s.” Lexa explained. 

“How do you even know what they look like?” Echo asked. “The tales of Wanheda have always been stories, rumors.”

“Not so,” Lexa countered. She went over to the table laden with maps and dug under several papers until she found a small book. It was a children’s book. “This is the only text I have ever found with reference to Wanheda in it. I gave it to Gustus many years ago so he could read it to his pup, and he’s had it ever since. He recently gave it back when the real Wanheda made herself known.” She looked at Clarke and winked.

She handed the small book to Costia. “Look at the picture on page 3.”

Costia did. It was a depiction of Wanheda that was a startling resemblance to Clarke. The woman on the page had bright blonde hair and piercing blue eyes, and her hair was weaved into a complex set of braids. “I want you to try and copy those.”

The raven-haired alpha studied the page. “I think I can do that. What’s the other favor?”

“I want Clarke to wear Azplana’s crown.”

Echo shot out of her seat. “No way. That crown belongs to Costia, and quite frankly it should be destroyed. It is a symbol of hatred and fear.”

Lexa raised an eyebrow at the spy. “That is exactly why I want Clarke to wear it.” She grabbed the bone headpiece from its bag. “Wanheda is the Commander of Death. She needs to look fearsome, and if this crown helps with that image, then I want it on her head. When she arrives at the gates of Polis on her horse, I want the image of her to strike fear into the hearts of Ontari and the Order. I want her to be the symbol of the death that awaits them.”

Costia nimbly took the crown from Lexa’s hands. She turned it to and fro. “That’s fine with me, but I agree with Echo, so promise me you will let me be the one to destroy it when this is all over.”

“You have my word,” Lexa promised.

Clarke watched the exchange in silence. She wasn’t exactly keen on wearing the disgusting thing on her head, but if it helped their cause, if it helped Lexa, then she would wear it. Hell, if marching into Polis naked somehow helped Lexa then she would do it. She was willing to do whatever it took to get Madi back. Taking out the Order and Ontari was just one of the perks in getting her pup back.

Clarke took the bone crown and stuck it on her head to try it out. It only made her a little nervous that it was a perfect fit, and she wouldn’t lie. It made her feel powerful.

“Tomorrow we will march on Polis. I won’t profess to know what I am doing, but your Heda does. We will follow her and bring death to the doorsteps of Polis.” She ran a finger over the crown and sneered. “Ai laik Wanheda (I am Wanheda), now let’s go burn down your house.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I would love to hear what you think of the reveal about the Order. I think it's funny because in their world this is such a shocking thing, but in our world, Titus and the others...well they are us, "designationless freaks." Who out there would want a designation? Would I want to be an alpha, beta, or omega? Hell yeah, I would...maybe...okay, I am not so sure.
> 
> Thank you to everyone who left a comment and kudos last chapter.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We are almost to the end of the week, and that's a wonderful thing. Here's a little something to tide you over until the weekend really starts.

Chapter 15

The march on Polis worked like a well-oiled machine, and that was all because of Lexa. She worked tirelessly to keep everyone in order. She moved constantly between her people, giving encouragement and lifting spirits with her wise and well-timed words. She’d ride at the back of the lines and speak to her gona (warriors), and she would return to take the lead, showing that she was willing to be first in line when the attack started. All the while, Wanheda was at her side. 

On Clarke’s head was the bone crown, her hair was intricately braided, and her face was painted with grey blue warpaint. She was an impressive figure, but what made her look most opposing was the new armor Lexa had surprised her with. 

The alpha had no idea how Lexa had gotten her hands on the protective armor, sturdy leather boots, or the navy leather duster. It was a mystery for another day. All she knew was that she looked damn fine in her new getup, and she had preened and puffed up her chest when Lexa dressed her in the first new clothing she had ever owned. 

The surprising part of the march had been that most of Arkadia joined the ranks of those marching to free Lexa’s city. Every delinquent including Jasper, and thus his father, chose to join the fight. Marcus Kane marched next to Indra, and Abby and Eric Jackson walked at the back with a group ready to help those who got injured. Even Charles Pike and some of the survivors from Farm Station joined in. 

Clarke had initially been worried about the Farm Station survivors who wanted to join the fight, but Lexa had not been. The omega had slowly been worming her way into the hearts of the survivors, and with Echo’s help, she had gained their trust. Each day leading up to the march, Lexa made a point of going to visit Charles and his group. She even helped tend to their injured members, and it didn’t take them long to realize that their experience with Azgeda was the exception to how things were on the ground, not the rule. The omega showed them that life on the ground could be one filled with laughter, prosperity, and love. She taught them that life was more than just about surviving, and she did all of that in the little time there was between their making their way to Arkadia with Echo and the time they fell in line to march to the Capital. 

Clarke wasn’t the only one who marveled over Lexa’s skills as a leader. Just about everyone from Arkadia was in awe of her grace and finesse when it came to taking charge. More than once, Raven made a joke about how hot Heda was working her way through the crowd. Each time it earned her a playful smack from her mate. 

Even Abby couldn’t hold her voice and often praised the young woman and her skills. Of course, Abby could have been biased. She was enamored by her daughter-in-law.

On the first night of the march, Clarke and Lexa were lying in their tent. The day had gone surprisingly well. They knew there would be attacks from Ontari’s people as they marched, but fortunately none had come that day. They knew they wouldn’t get so lucky the next day, not as they got closer to the Capital.

“Why didn’t you ever tell the people about the Order yet?” Clarke wondered as she rolled over to cuddle into her wife. For a change, the air wasn’t humid and hot. There was a pleasant chill in their tent, and it made for good snuggling. 

Clarke couldn’t see her mate’s eyes in the dark, but she felt Lexa looking at her as the omega contemplated her answer. “I wanted to. I did, but Titus was unaware that I heard him spilling their secret. Plus, I did it for my people. Until recently, their belief in the Order was unwavering. For me to spout off the secret, for the people to know that the Order that they worship is filled with nothing but men who want to be false gods, it would have destroyed them. The time was never right, and…and I was doing well as Heda, even if I was under the watchful eye of the Order.” 

Lexa rolled and rested her forehead against Clarke’s. “I was able to unite the clans, and except for a skirmish here and there, the fighting stopped, and the people began to prosper, really prosper. Goods were traded freely, and people could travel outside their clans without the worry that they would be attacked. We are twelve clans, but we were also becoming one clan. The people were slowly coming together, and that is all I ever wanted for them, and if that meant keeping the secret, then I would.” She nuzzled her nose against Clarke’s. “That ends though. When we get to the walls of Polis, I will tell our people exactly who has been influencing them throughout the generations. I will tell them how and why the Order has shrouded themselves in secrecy, because it’s clear that we no longer need them. The army at my back proves that. Despite everything that has happened, the people still follow me.”

Clarke moved in for a searing kiss. “That’s because you are the most amazing person in the universe.”

The alpha didn’t see the eye roll. “Klark.”

“It’s true. I’ve lived in space. I’ve seen more of it than you have, and you are damn amazing.” She kissed her mate again, and it left both of them gasping. 

After Lexa caught her breath, she leaned over to light a candle.

“What are you doing?” Clarke asked. 

“I want you to see me when I say what I am going to say next.”

That made the alpha curious and she leaned up on her elbow.

“I don’t know if I have ever said it, but I wanted to say thank you for saving me.”

“Lex, you don’t need to thank me for that.”

“Let me finish, hodnes.” Lexa shifted until she was sitting and looking down at her mate. “You could have let me die in that forest, and I would have deserved it after everything I put you through, but instead, you found it in your heart to forgive me all my transgressions, and you brought me to Arkadia to heal. You gave me your love, and you gave me the family I thought I would never have. You also gave me back me.” 

Clarke moved to sit, but Lexa held her down. “I had given up on myself. When I escaped, I only wanted to get to you so that you would know about our pup. I never expected to survive, Klark.” Clarke whimpered, and Lexa ran a hand through the alpha’s blonde hair. “You gave me back my life, Klark. You made me realize what it was to live and to love again, and more than that, you gave me back the belief that I could be a good Commander to our people.”

The alpha struggled past Lexa’s arm and sat. “You are a good Commander, but you are also a good person and a better mate,” She grabbed Lexa’s hand and placed it over her heart, “and I know you are going to be a spectacular mother.” Clarke felt Lexa tremble. “You already are. You are ready to tear down your own home to get to Madi, and that speaks loud and clear to the love you have for her.”

“Klark.”

“She’s almost within our grasp Lex,” Clarke went on. “I have every confidence that Aden has infiltrated the Tower and has made his way to Madi. Even if he can’t escape with her, I know he’s found her and engulfed her in love. I also know that she knows we are coming. I meant it when I said a pup knows where her nomon (mother) is at all times. She knows you are getting close. She feels your love, and she knows she will be in your arms soon.”

Lexa looked at Clarke hopefully. “Mochof (Thank you), ai tombom (my heart), for everything.” She pushed her alpha back down and straddled her. “I need you to remember something.”

Clarke allowed herself to be pinned. “What’s that, my love?”

“You are amazing too, and there might not be any studies about the bonds between a sire and their pup, but I know within my heart of hearts that Madi knows you are coming for her too. She feels every bit of love you have for her. I know it.”

Clarke looked hopeful. “I hope so.”

The second day started as well as the first, but it wasn’t long before the hairs on the back of Lexa’s neck started to stand on end. She was at the front of the line, sitting astride her horse when something, some primal instinct, told her to stop.

She raised a fisted hand in the air, silently commanding her army to halt.

Clarke gave her a look. “What is it? What’s wrong?” She kept her voice at a whisper.

“I’m not certain, but my instincts are telling me that we need to tread carefully from here until we reach Polis.”

“We are still more than a day away,” Clarke pointed out.

“That may be, but I have a feeling that if we don’t watch every step we take, we will regret it.”

“Fine, then let me scout ahead. I got pretty good at spotting things when I was living on my own.”

Lexa gave her a small smile. Her mate’s offer was sweet. “That may be, but I need Wanheda at my side, not dead because she missed a pit full of spikes and fell into it.”

“That almost happened to me, you know. I almost fell in a trap just like that. Without Bellamy, I would have been full of holes…and dead.”

Lexa shuddered at the thought. She looked back to where Bellamy was walking with his sister and Lincoln. She would have to thank him for saving Clarke’s life.

Beside them, Raven rolled her eyes from her perch behind Anya on their stallion. “Is she telling that story again? How many times is that, huh Clarke?”

“Stuff it, Rae. I don’t have enough fingers or toes to count the times you told the story how Murphy shot you.”

Anya growled and accidentally tugged on the reins of the horse, making it jerk its head.

“Whoa, Nellie. Calm down,” Raven patted the horse’s flank. 

“I’ve told you that my horse in not named Nellie,” Anya grumbled.

“And I have told you that it is a figure of speech,” Raven snarked right back.

Lexa shot them a withering look. “All of you, knock it off.” She pointed at Anya. “General, pick a few of your best men to scout ahead. If there are traps ahead of us, I want them found.”

“Sha, Heda.” Anya turned her horse to seek out the men she needed.

“Too-da-loo,” Raven waved at them as they departed, but then she pulled at Anya’s hips and made her stop the horse.

“Raven,” Lexa barked. 

“Yeah, yeah. Time to be serious. I get it.” She held up her hands in mock defense but almost lost her balance forcing her to grasp Anya around her waist.

Clarke held in her snicker. She didn’t want Lexa’s glare to be turned on her. 

“Let me down,” Raven said to her mate. “I was going to wait to show you my surprise until we got to Polis, but this might be the better time to bring out my flying monkeys.”

Lexa fidgeted on her saddle. She didn’t have time for Raven’s antics. 

“Flying monkeys?” Clarke asked, intrigued. “Like from the Wizard of Oz?”

Raven got that maniacal look that she only got when she was about to reveal her best work. She rubbed her hands together. “Just wait and see my pretties.”

Anya helped her off the horse, and as soon as she was on the ground she sprinted as fast as her injured leg would take her to a cart laden with supplies, weapons, and a box that she had carefully packed herself.

Raven nudged the gona nearest her. “Can you get this down for me?”

“Sha tinka (tinkerer/mechanic).” The man lifted the box with ease and set it gently upon the ground. 

Lexa could see the omega practically vibrating in excitement. It was another thing she appreciated about the Skai people. The excitement they showed about the things they were learning, the wonders of the Earth, and the accomplishments they made. It was so rare to see one of her fellow grounders so excited, and when Raven lifted two strange machines in her hands and explained what they did, Lexa was essentially vibrating with the same excitement.

“These,” Raven said with a flourish, “are my flying monkeys.” 

Before Lexa could ask what that meant, Raven went on. “There’s no need to send scouts in to find any traps or hidden enemies. My drones will do that for you.” In demonstration, she sent one into the air, and there wasn’t a single eye that didn’t follow the path of the little machine. There was a collective gasp when Raven sent the next one up. 

It was perhaps the first time Lexa had seen such awe on the faces of her people. Even the Maunon (Mountain Men) had not possessed such technology. 

Raven got out a laptop computer. “I can direct them with just the push of a few buttons, and I can see what they see.” She tapped a couple of keys and the drones raced forward. She dug in her box and got out two more machines. “I can’t take all the credit for these,” she said distractedly as she got the next two drones up and running. “Monty, Sinclair, and Wick helped me build them. There’s about sixteen more where those four came from. I thought they would come in handy when we got to the Polis, but if we can spare the scouts and use a few drones instead, I think it’s a good idea.”

In an unusual show of affection, Lexa crushed the omega to her. “You are a genius, strik sora (little bird). Your machines are utterly amazing. Mochof (thank you).”

Raven was blushing. “Hey, no problem.”

When Lexa let her go, she saw most of her men were trying to hide little smirks, but a few were beaming openly at her show of fondness. Many seemed relieved that their Commander was open with her emotions instead of being hard-edged and serious. As she looked at her gona, she realized that a new chapter was being written for her people; one that would no longer require them to only show passivity or strength. She hadn’t realized how freeing it was to open herself up to her emotions, and she saw from the looks on the faces of the men and women following her that they were starting to feel that freedom too.

Lexa sat glued next to Raven as the screen of her laptop showed the progress of the drones. So far, through their cameras, they had found seven traps and three hordes of Ontari’s men waiting to ambush them. One smart thinking Azgedan shot down one of the drones, so after that, Raven had to take more care with where and how she steered the flying devices. With the aid of the machines, three different groups of volunteers went into the forest to dispatch the gona waiting for them, and all traps were avoided. After that, the march was just as it was the first day except the mood was decidedly more amped up that night.

Clarke watched on in surprise as Lexa’s warriors sat around drinking, gorging on food, and even dancing. More than one person had brought out a crude musical instrument, and many people started to dance.

She couldn’t understand it. That past two days had been long and tiring, yet Lexa’s people were acting as if there wasn’t going to be a huge battle the next day. They were only a two-hour march away from Polis, but the people were acting as if the next day was a holiday.

Anya walked up to the confused alpha. “Don’t overthink it, Klark. Just try to relax and have some fun.”

“But there’s going to be a battle tomorrow. Some, maybe a lot, of them are going to die tomorrow.”

Anya turned to look at the festivities. “And that is exactly why they are acting the way they are. They know that it is possible that they won’t see the end of tomorrow, and they would gladly die in service to their Heda, so tonight they live like it is their last, and keyron (spirit) willing, they will be here to celebrate Heda’s return to the throne.”

Clarke frowned. “And how do you know Ontari doesn’t have her men waiting to take everyone out after everyone has gotten drunk and fallen asleep?”

Anya smacked the blonde upside the head. “Do you really think we haven’t planned for such an attack? I am this army’s General, and Lexa and I have planned for every contingency. No one will break through the line of gona I have surrounding this camp, and even if they did, every warrior here is fully capable of defending themselves, you, and our Heda even while completely drunk. Give me some credit.”

This was the surly alpha that Clarke remembered from before Mount Weather. It was obvious Skaikru and Raven had blurred Anya’s hard edges, but it only took one question from Clarke to have those edges honed sharp again.

She rubbed at her sore ear. “Sorry."

Anya grabbed her squarely but the shoulders. “I forget sometimes just how young and untrained you really are. You have done great things, Klark kom Skaikru, but it is understandable that you do not understand our ways. I want you to do something for me.”

Clarke looked up at the taller alpha. “What’s that?”

“I know you have been learning about what it means to be Wanheda. I need you to embrace what you have learned, and I need you to see that you are really her.” Anya spun around and pointed at the crowds of gona. “These people follow Heda, but they now also follow you. You are a natural born leader, and you need to show them that.” The older alpha pulled Clarke with her to a table laden with food and drink.

“Eat,” Anya commanded. “Drink.” She filled a plate for Clarke. “Go and walk among the men and talk to them. Get to know some of the people who are going to die for you tomorrow, but also know that they won’t be giving their lives in vain. They are offering their lives so that you, Heda, and your pup can have yours. This is who our people are, Klark, but hopefully after tomorrow, that will change. If we are successful, there won’t be the same need for any more fighting after this.”

“That’s mighty optimistic of you,” Clarke observed of the normally pessimistic alpha.

“Perhaps, but my outlook changed when your people saved me, and then when you brought our Heda to Arkadia.” Anya gave her a thin smile. “I am tired of fighting, Wanheda.”

Clarke understood. With her plate in hand, she went to walk away from the General. “You said ‘my people’ saved you Anya. They are our people.”

“Sha, they are. It was a slip of the tongue.” Since she was already being out of character, and especially since witnessing Lexa’s show of affection toward her mate earlier, Anya did something she hadn’t done since she was a small pup. She stuck her tongue out at Clarke.

Clarke wandered around the different groups of men and women as they ate and drank into the night. Raging fires lit her way as a hot wind whipped at her hair. She was thankful that Costia had braided it so tightly, otherwise it would have been a tangled mess. At first the tight weave had given her a headache, but she had since gotten used to her new hairdo.

As she walked, she had words with many of Lexa’s people. Each bowed their head to her, and many looked at her with a sense of wonderment in their eyes. She heard the people call her both Wanheda and Mountain Slayer more times than she could count. Many of the gona even thanked her for what she had done at Mount Weather and told her that she had given them back family members they had thought lost to them forever. It made her uneasy at first, but as she got used to it, a sense of pride overtook her. What she had accomplished during her short time on Earth was something that no one could shake a stick at. 

With this new sense of satisfaction filling her chest, she wandered to the protective outer line of the camp. She looked around for a place to deposit her empty plate, but it looked like the wash station was on the far side of everything, so she kept it in her empty hands for now. Hundreds of men and women had volunteered to take watch over the night so that the rest of the army could do what they wanted with their possible last night on Earth. Clarke passed one tent where amorous moans could be heard, and she blushed when she scented Echo and Costia. She quickened her pace lest she be accused of listening in. She spotted Lexa speaking with Indra, and she made a beeline to them. 

“Wanheda,” Indra dipped her head at Clarke.

“Wormana.” Clarke looked around her. Every warrior was alert with their hands on their weapons. While she knew Lexa and Anya had a huge part in organizing the march and setting up the line of defense, it was Indra who was keeping it together. The woman was a rigid but fair task master.

Clarke quirked one side of her lips up when she spotted Octavia, Harper, and Bellamy all on the front line, guarding the people within. She was proud of the motley crew of delinquents. They weren’t chatting or having fun. They were taking their jobs seriously and standing as rigid and watchful as every other gona standing watch. 

Clarke was just about to thank Indra for her efforts to keep everyone safe when an arrow came sailing out of thin air at her mate. The shaft was black as the night, and the dark, feathered fletching made it impossibly silent. She’s not sure how she spotted it, or what possessed her, but some instinct had her moving, and she swung the empty metal plate that she was still carrying up in front of Lexa, deflecting the arrow and saving her mate’s life. 

After that, the rest of the night was a blur. She and Lexa were suddenly surrounded by gona. Gustus, who she thought was sleeping, was suddenly ushering them back into the confines of the camp, and fighting could be heard all around the perimeter of their temporary stronghold. What she could see through the bodies protecting her came as a shock. The men and women who had been eating, drinking, and having fun kept on doing just that. A few looked up from what their conversations, but they otherwise ignored the fighting around them. 

Clarke thought every person around them would have joined the fight. Lexa assured her that if the rest of her men were needed, the signal to attack would be sounded. For now, Indra and the volunteers had everything well in hand. 

As they were guided to their tent, Lexa informed her mate that such attacks on the line were to be expected, and she assured the alpha that what was happening was a simple war game. Ontari was flexing her muscles and trying to show her might, at the same time as looking for weaknesses in Lexa’s army. The Usurper would find none, and the fighting would be over within the hour.

Clarke’s mind was a mess, even hearing this information. Aside from the fighting that was taking place now, the march to Polis had seemed too easy so far, but Lexa and her top men and women seemed unaffected, so she tried to let her worries go.

That’s not to say she didn’t want to ask about it, she did, but she didn’t get the chance. Her omega crushed her against the center pole of their canvas home and started to undress her. Lexa held out her hand, and Clarke numbly handed her the dented plate that she was still carrying. 

The omega looked it over. “You saved my life, niron.” Lexa set the plate aside and nibbled at Clarke’s neck. “Not even Indra or I heard that arrow coming. Your quick instincts…well, let’s just say this war might have gone differently if you hadn’t decided to find me.”

Clarke trembled at the thought. She could have just lost her mate to a single arrow. 

“You really are the Commander of Death,” Lexa went on, “and you didn’t allow mine to happen.” She undid the strings of Clarke’s pants and pushed them down. “Now, I think it’s only fair that I reward you for that.”

The alpha wanted to make a remark about the fact that her mate had an awfully cavalier attitude about almost losing her life, but instead she moaned when Lexa sank to her knees and plastered her mouth to Clarke’s clit. After that, all thoughts were lost from the blonde’s head and her moans joined those coming from many of the tents around them.

The next morning, she found herself alone in their furs, and she almost felt guilty for how relaxed she felt. Lexa had worked her over for nearly half an hour the night before Clarke had lost control and pinned the omega beneath her, and then she returned the favor to her mate and made love to her. It was rough, and it was wild, and it was exactly what they needed the night before the most important day of their lives. 

She slid out from under the covers and was pleased to find the air still had a slight nip to it. She was just finishing lacing her pants when her mate came back into the tent. Lexa was ready for war. She had already donned her warpaint and pauldron, and the red sash over her shoulder nearly touched the ground. Her dual swords were sheathed on her back, and the mask of Heda was in place. There would be no teasing or light touches now. Heda was ready to storm her Capital and take back what was hers.

The omega moved over to Clarke and gave her a chaste kiss before handing the alpha her armor and painting the blonde’s face with her own warpaint. A few braids were neatened, and then Lexa placed the bone crown on her mate’s head. 

“You look fierce.” Lexa said as she stood back and took in the image of her mate. “I have one more thing for you.” She secured a pauldron and a grey-blue sash to Clarke’s shoulder. 

Clarke looked at herself in a small piece of mirror. “Wanheda,” she whispered mostly to herself. She barely recognized herself, and she did indeed look fierce. 

“Are you ready, hodnes?” Lexa asked.

A slight twinge of nerves pulled at Clarke’s stomach, but she tamped out the feeling. Instead, she puffed herself up, standing at her full height. “I am. Let’s go get Madi.” 

The sun had not yet risen by the time they left camp. No one bothered to break it down. Everything was left as it was. If things went well, there would be time for that later. Now, as she sat upon her horse, she looked around. Gona spread out on either side of her, and behind her. During the march over the last two days, things had been organized but spread out. Now, the army was in tight formation and moving as one. It was an incredible sight to behold.

Just as they eclipsed the top of a hill and the giant city of Polis came into view, a thunderous, rhythmic booming started behind her, startling her so badly she almost fell off her horse. 

Raven, who was now on her own horse, and not sitting behind her mate, whispered, “War drums.”

Octavia, who was nearby, sat up tall, enthralled by the noise. Anya and Lexa gave them a smile. 

The noise was so deafening that Clarke didn’t get the chance to fully appreciate the sight before her. The tall walls of the city didn’t hide the neighborhoods contained within, and the alpha could see that under normal circumstances the city would be bustling with activity. In the middle of it all was Heda’s tower. It rose out of the center of the city like a beacon of hope. A large flame burned at the top of it. Heda’s flame.

She halted her horse. They were still nearly a mile away, but she scented the air. It may have all been in her head, but when she was finally able to clear her nose of the scents of smoke, cooked food, and excitement, she would swear that she could smell the subtle combined tones of her and her mate wafting from the city. The smell was intoxicating and held a note of something that she couldn’t quite place, and for lack of a better word, she labeled it defiance. 

Lexa was doing the same thing, and the second she identified the scent, she knew. “Our pup. She knows we are here.”

At the moment of their shared realization, something in Clarke clicked into place, making her gasp. A matching gasp escaped her mate, and they looked at each other. The alpha wasn’t sure that anyone else could see it, but her mate was suddenly rimmed by a red aura. Looking down at herself, she seemed to be rimmed in blue.

“The spirit of Wanheda,” Lexa whispered in wonder, thinking perhaps Wanheda really was a separate entity from Clarke, although not one-hundred percent certain. “It really does reside within you.”

“And Heda in you,” Clarke replied full of awe.

Unconsciously, Lexa moved herself closer to Clarke, and when they were merely a few inches apart, their auras melded and became one. Clarke hadn’t been sure what would happen, but if anything, she thought their combined colors would turn purple, but that wasn’t the case. Red and blue swirled around them then suddenly flashed a blinding white before disappearing completely. 

This time, Clarke was sure everyone around them could see it, for as soon as the flash receded, every person not on a horse dropped to a knee. Those on horses exposed their necks. Heda and Wanheda had risen and their spirits had converged to become one.

After a few moments Lexa bade her people to rise. There was stunned silence in the air before the drum beat resumed, only faster and louder, and chants of Heda and Wanheda could be heard. Lexa had a new determination in her eyes when she signaled her people to move forward.

The two leaders raised their fists in unison. “Kom wor (to war).”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So tinka is not in the Trigedesleng dictionary. I know. I have looked, but I saw the word in another story, no idea which one, and I liked it so much I remembered it. Tinka (tinkerer) for Raven is a perfect word. I just wish I could give credit to the person who came up with it. 
> 
> If you are enjoying this story, please leave kudos or comment. I love to hear from all of you.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter kicked the skish out of me. It was a beast to write and completely uncooperative. It might be because there are several POVs in this one, or it might be just one of those things that you can't control. 
> 
> There was one paragraph that was so bad that my wife rewrote the entire thing for me, and thank goodness, because it is so much better now. I'll give you a cookie if you can figure out which paragraph she wrote.

Chapter 16

Anya sat on her horse absolutely gobsmacked. She had been carefully watching Heda and Wanheda, and as the march progressed that morning, the pair had seemed completely unaware that they were mirroring each other’s movements. Perhaps mirroring wasn’t the correct word. The two were moving in unison. When Lexa turned to look over her right shoulder, Clarke did too. When Clarke readjusted herself in her saddle, Lexa did as well. It hadn’t initially been so obvious, but as the army got closer to the city, their behavior became glaring, especially when she watched them lift their heads to scent the air. It was as if something shot through them. They smelled something that had them sitting up tall and puffing up their chests. Anya scented the air herself, but only caught the scent of her mate and those around her. 

It had been an interesting phenomenon that Anya had at first attributed to the mates’ newly reformed bond, but as she watched, she realized it was something more. Raven, who was next to her, and Bellamy, who wasn’t far behind also seemed to be just as captivated by their leaders’ motions. 

“Holy shit on a stick,” Raven gasped when small red tendrils of light started to seep from Heda. It was Bellamy’s gasp when he noticed Clarke that had Anya turning her full attention to the alpha. The air was shimmering blue around her.

Anya thought he was going to say something, but before he could, as if drawn together, Clarke and Lexa’s horses moved closer so that their Heda’s thighs were touching. She wasn’t entirely sure contact was ever made because just then a blinding light built up around them and exploded outward. The light was gone as suddenly as it appeared.

Everyone had to blink a few times to clear their sight, and as they did, they were taken over by a sudden sense of calm, of rightness. Everyone stared at the powerful pair, and Anya had the sense that they had just witnessed something special, something important, something not witnessed since the dawn of the clans. It was the convergence of two souls into one, and it was beautiful.

Before the alpha knew what was happening, those around her were kneeling or baring their necks. She hadn’t even realized that she had done the same thing. Fealty was not demanded, but it was freely given that day by all who witnessed the strange event.

With barely any time to recover, the leaders, who seemed unphased by what just happened, were calling them to war, and the army surged forward. Gone was the tight control that had been held during the march. The first wave of warriors went running at the gates with Lexa and Clarke right in the thick of things. Ryder, Gustus, and Indra were with them, ensuring their safety. 

Anya had a different job to do that morning. She called together a predesignated team from Skaikru to her, and just as they had practiced in camp the night before, they grabbed the few guns the Sky people had. Bellamy took his, and he reluctantly gave one to Jasper and Murphy. Monroe and Harper were given rifles, and then the big toys were taken off Raven’s cart. 

“Come to Mommy,” Raven said when Bellamy handed her their secret weapon. There were three more rockets where that one came from. 

Anya pulled a map from her saddle bag. She pointed to four locations on the thick inked paper. “You know what to do.”

The other members of Sky crew gathered metal tripods and made their way hastily to their setup points. 

Already before them, the fighting at the Polis gates was ferocious, and once again, Anya was struck by her two leaders. Both were off their horses and fighting opponents twice their size, and anyone looking would never have known that Clarke had only just begun to train in how to fight. This time her moves were mirroring Lexa’s. Every thrust, parry, and stab of her sword matched Lexa’s, and it was a sight to behold. It was like watching a perfectly choreographed ballet except with lots and lots of blood.

“Keyron (spirit) keep them safe,” Anya whispered as she ran with her gear to help Raven set up. Behind them, Sinclair, Monty, and Wick were setting loose the drones. After Raven had demonstrated her drones the second day of marching, the omega had lamented the fact that they hadn’t thought to weaponize the small machines. It didn’t matter. If they could keep them in the air, they would provide valuable information on what was happening inside the walls. One drone was set aside for Raven to control once they blew the walls. She would try to send it up to infiltrate where Lexa thought Madi was being held. 

On top of and in front of the walls, the fighting was raging on. As Raven set up her rocket launcher, she could hear Ontari’s men taunting her. It was clear that they thought her weapon was going to be unsuccessful. It was probably also why there were few traps and warriors waiting for them during the march to the Capital which was exactly what Heda was banking on. Ontari thought her army was safe within the walls of Polis. Word of her “failed” demonstration for the scouts had clearly gotten around, just the way they wanted it to. The omega ignored the taunts, but there was the slightest fear that her weapons wouldn’t work. Once in place, Raven grabbed the remote, only to then be knocked to the ground as three arrows went flying her way. Anya had saved her from being turned into a pin cushion.

With completely blown pupils, Raven looked at her mate. “Th-thanks.”

Anya gave her a quick smile then rolled the two of them to the left as more arrows sailed over them. It seemed that even though those on the top of the walls thought her weapon would fail, they weren’t taking any chances. 

The alpha general started barking orders. “Gon ai (To me),” she called to several, and the soldiers came charging over with shields to protect Raven as she finished setting up her weapon. The metal tripod had gotten knocked over when Anya tackled her mate to the ground. Once the rocket was on its launcher again, Raven looked to where the other three were finished being set up. It seemed the others weren’t targeted as heavily as she had been.

She waited for the other teams to give the signal then reached into a bag and handed her alpha a pair of ear protectors. “Put these on,” she insisted. “It’s going to be loud this time.”

Anya begrudgingly put on the protectors, but not until after giving the signal that the weapons were ready. A rapid series of horn blows could be heard, and all those near the target sites by the wall took off running.

“Here we go,” Raven said and pushed her red button. 

At first nothing happened, and the people on the wall started to cheer thinking Raven had failed yet again, but then four loud whooshes could be heard, and the wall shattered with the loudest explosion Anya had ever heard. She would be forever grateful that her mate had given her ears some protection. She wasn’t sure if she would be able to hear if not for them, and she hoped her gona (warriors) were all okay. 

Looking up, she watched as rock, rubble, and bodies flew through the air; wholly satisfied with the result of Raven’s hard work. 

Next to her, Raven was cackling like a mad woman. “Yippeekayay Azgeda motherfuckers.”

“Skrish (shit), skrish, skrish, skrish , skrish,” Aden chanted as he ran through the halls of the Tower, screaming baby in his arms. He’d been waiting for his moment to nab Madi since he first arrived back in Polis. It hadn’t been easy. He’d had to hide and sneak around like never before. The wicked false Commander had her equally wicked guards protecting almost every door, even the doors to the rooms that were empty. 

It had taken him time to find where Madi had been moved to. Ontari’d had Madi well protected the whole time, even before Anya “stole” him to go to Arkadia and give blood to his Heda, but he had always been able to go in and see her. After all, the Order encouraged socialization among the Natblidas (Nightbloods), including even the youngest pups. Aden, though, was the only Nightblood who knew Madi’s secret. The other Natblidas, well, they were mostly being used as babysitters then and thought Madi was just another Nightblood pup. He was the only one privy to the knowledge that the newest addition to the Tower belonged to Heda. 

Things, however, had changed since his return to Polis. Madi was being kept isolated, and every member of the Order seemed edgy and on guard. They also seemed nervous, like they feared a secret about them was about to be revealed, and Ontari, she was ruthless and cruel. She threatened daily to kill the other Nightbloods saying that she was Commander now and there would be no need for more Nightbloods after her. She planned to rule the 12 clans until her death a long, long time from now, and after that, it would only be children she sired who would rule. It was only the begging and groveling from the Order that kept the Natblidas alive. They knelt at Ontari’s feet imploring her not to kill the pups.

One day, from his hiding spot behind some thick curtains, he had witnessed her cut the head off one of the members of the Order for daring to speak up against her. He watched as the other members seemed to shrink into themselves, and later he had heard several of them cursing Titus for sending for the rogue alpha from Azgeda to begin with. The power the Order had held for almost 100 years was dwindling because of Ontari’s despotic notions. She wanted all the power, and the members of the Order were in her way. Everyone knew she was only keeping them and the Nightbloods alive because, for now, she had a use for them.

Aden shivered. The air inside was hot and muggy, but the atmosphere in the Tower was nothing like it had been when Lexa had resided there. It was tense and somehow cold despite the summer heat. It had been bad when Lexa had been imprisoned, but it had gotten decidedly worse since then. The halls smelled of sour fear, and the bitch Ontari seemed to have scent marked the entire place. Everywhere he snuck wreaked of her fetid stench. The boy sneezed and still wasn’t able to clear his nostrils of her rotten smell. 

The young omega continued to run, thankful that the halls were almost clear of gona. Ontari’s men were now mostly outside joining the fight or guarding her in the throne room.

He turned a corner trying to get to the catacombs that would lead him out of Polis. As he ran, he tried to soothe Madi with his pheromones, but the pup wouldn’t calm, not since he had snatched her out of the arms of the Order member who was supposed to bring her to Ontari. 

The woman, named Orusula (an evil wench), had been sent to fetch the pup, but Aden knew the battle would be starting soon. He had heard Ontari barking orders from the Throne room. Her men had gone filing out of the Tower, and from a perch high above the city he had watched as they had taken up positions all over the capital and at the wall. He knew if Madi was going to be safe, he was going to have to try and get her out of there. Ontari seemed to have no use for children, but he knew the false Commander would do whatever it took to defeat Heda Lexa, and that meant she wouldn’t stop at using or harming Madi to get to the real Commander. 

Hearing footsteps, he slid into a broom closet, thankful that Madi had finally quieted down. Five well-armed Azgedans stomped by. Aden cursed again. He was still far too high up in the Tower, and he was going to have come up with a different plan if he was going to succeed in getting Madi out of it. Even with the moderately empty halls, there were still too many warriors running around who could catch him at any moment. 

He cracked the door open to see if the coast was clear, checking his hip for the shock baton before leaving. He’d had to use it on Orusula with devastating results. She’d almost trapped him as she was lifting Madi from her crib. He’d panicked. He accidentally set the device to its lethal setting, and the way the woman had convulsed and foamed at the mouth before falling to the floor after being hit was more frightening than the first time he saw Heda Lexa kill someone, and that had been during a vicious challenge to the death. He hoped he wouldn’t have to use it again. Thankfully, the woman had barely lifted Madi from the crib before dropping the pup. The baby had landed softly in her furs. Not that it mattered, she was crying her little lungs out by then.

Down below, Heda and Wanheda were covered in dust, dirt, and blood. If they were aware that they were cutting down their enemies as a mirrored pair, they didn’t show it. They fought side by side and eliminated each enemy as they rushed at them. Behind them the bodies were piling up, yet there was no sign of Ontari or any member of the Order.

“The cowards are hiding in the Tower,” Lexa yelled over the noise. She was pushing her way past part of the broken wall. Above her, Raven’s drones had been set loose.

Beside her Clarke coughed. The dust here was thick. She spat, and the spittle was tinged with blood. She had taken a hard hit to her jaw and was lucky it wasn’t broken. Already her pale skin was blossoming into an impressive bruise. She suddenly clutched at her heart, alarming her mate. “M-Madi…she’s on the move. I can feel it.”

Clarke’s face was full of terror. She had no idea who was moving her child, all she knew was that it felt like she was being moved fast. Blue eyes sought out the omega, and Lexa looked just as frightened. 

“I feel it too,” Lexa said. “We need to get in there.” 

“With any luck, Costia and Echo are already in,” Clarke yelled.

Costia gripped Echo’s hand as they creeped through the tunnels deep below the Tower. They were using a strange Skaikru torch that Raven had called a flashlight to get through the dark tunnels. Without it, it would be pitch black. Every few minutes they had to refer to the map Anya had drawn them. Echo would point the flashlight at the paper while Costia deciphered where to go. Anya was many things, but she was not a good artist. Three times they had taken a wrong turn and had to backtrack.

Neither woman had ever been in the bowels of the Tower before. As it was, Echo had never actually been in the Tower. She’d never been able to gain access to it, not even with as good a spy as she used to be. 

The beta shivered next to her soon to be mate. They were close to the dungeons, and it was clear that they were full. Based on the groaning and the stench of fear coming from the area, the cells were packed, and the beta had no doubt that the current residents of the prison were likely innocent citizens from the city above them that dared to somehow insult the koken (crazy) false Commander. Ontari may be free of Nia’s influence, but she was still the former Azplana’s mentee. The queen used to have a penchant for imprisoning her people for even the smallest infractions, and Echo had no doubt that Ontari enjoyed the same proclivities.

“Which way should we go?” Costia asked, looking at the map again. Echo squinted her eyes in the bad lighting. Echo analyzed the map and shone the flashlight around. She smirked, but Costia didn’t see it in the dark. 

“How ‘bout we go up?” Echo used the flameless torch to show that they were at the base of some stairs. 

Costia paused and pulled Echo to her. Leaning in for a kiss, she said, “I hope we aren’t walking into a trap.”

“Lexa,” Clarke yelled. She had gotten separated from her mate by a throng of people rushing at them. Most of them were their people, but enough of them were Ontari’s that they’d had to fight their way to the entrance of the Tower. The blonde had gotten pulled back just as Lexa had made her way in, and the alpha had no choice but to fight the burly man who attacked her. Without Lexa at her side, she faltered, and the warrior got in a good swing of the sword taking a chunk of Clarke’s side out of her.

She screamed, and her knees almost buckled at the pain, but she held her ground and flashed out with her own sword. Holding her side with her right hand, she fought the man using her left. Indra, who’d been nearby the entire time finally dispatched the man for Clarke. She hadn’t been able to take him on her own.

“I need to get to Lexa,” Clarke said as she stumbled. Her right hand was covered with blood.

Indra ran up to her. She fished something out of her pocket. It was a little satchel. The war chief made Clarke sit on the ground, removed the alpha’s bloody hand from her side and poured the contents of the satchel into the seeping wound.

Clarke screamed. Whatever was in the satchel burned like wildfire. 

“Fuck, Indra, a little warning next time.”

The wormana rolled her eyes. “It will stop the bleeding for a while. You are lucky that the wound isn’t deeper. If it were, you would already have bled to death.”

Clarke shivered. The wound felt like it reached all the way into her insides. She used the bandage Indra handed her to hastily cover the open flesh.

“Mochof (thank you), Indra.”

The woman said nothing. She gave Clarke a nod then a hand to help her stand up. Clarke wanted to turn toward the entrance of the tower, but it had been overrun.

“Is there another way in?”

“Sha, Wanheda.” Indra pointed west. “There is another door on that side, but I don’t know if you will be able to get in. It’s not usually unlocked.”

Clarke didn’t care. She had to get to Lexa. She started sprinting just as one of Raven’s drones went flying overhead. It entered the Tower through a third-floor balcony. At this point, Clarke wondered if the drones were even helpful. Just as she was about to get to the door, a hand grasped her shoulder, and the alpha spun around to meet her attacker head on. It was Abby.

Clarke stopped the movement of her sword just in time. “Mom. You’re not supposed to be a part of the fighting,” Clarke accused.

“And you were supposed to stay safe. She pulled up the side of the alpha’s bloodied and ruined shirt. Unfortunately, the warrior had known where to strike her. Her armor hadn’t covered this one small bit of skin.

“Mom, stop. I need to go.”

A wall of Lexa’s warriors suddenly surrounded her and Abby. “What the…”

“They are keeping you safe until I can properly clean and cover that wound. We saw what happened from one of Raven’s drones. Without it we would have had no idea you were hurt.”

Clarke tried to pull her shirt down. “Indra already treated it.”

“No, she stopped the bleeding. That’s all. Give me two minutes, Clarke, and I will be finished.”

“Fine,” Clarke said impatiently at the same time as being thankful the drones actually were good for something. Abby stabbed a syringe into the intact skin around the wound, and suddenly it didn’t hurt anymore. Yup, the drones were helpful.

She let Abby finish her ministrations, but the second her mother was done, Clarke was back on her feet. She was about to take off running again when she felt something pulling at her. She looked around, but there was nothing there. Then she felt the pulling sensation again, and it had her looking up. When she did, her eyes locked onto the most frightening and most wonderful thing she had ever seen. 

Aden was standing on the balcony, and in his arms was a pup. Her pup, and Madi was beautiful. It didn’t matter that Clarke couldn’t see much of her. She could see a tiny hand, and the shock of soft, wispy hair on Madi’s head, and that was enough for the alpha to fall head over heels in love with the sight of her daughter.

Clarke gasped as tears began to pour out of her eyes at the sight. Next to her, Abby was looking up too. “Mom, that’s her. That’s my pup.”

Abby was too shocked to say anything.

“I’ve got to get to her.” Clarke made to run, but instead froze when she saw Aden get closer to the edge. He was surrounded by Ontari’s men, and they all had their swords drawn. He was trapped. 

“Aden,” she screamed, and somehow over all the noise of the fighting, he heard her. He turned his head to look down at her then to the warriors surrounding him. He looked like he was about to make a decision. He clutched Madi to him, and then he held her out over the railing of the balcony, and Clarke intuitively knew what he was going to do.

“No, Aden, no. Don’t.”

“Catch,” he shouted and dropped Madi.

The pup squealed on her way down, and Clarke moved her feet as fast as they could move. She almost didn’t make it in time, but just as she thought she was going to watch her child hit the ground, her arms suddenly found themselves full of the screaming and upset pup. 

She groaned and fell to her knees at the impact, and she was certain she felt something crunch inside her knee. Her pup might not have weighed much but catching a child from such a height was painful, and she knew her side was bleeding again. Her body was screaming out in pain, but she didn’t care. Her pup, her daughter, was in her arms at long last. She squeezed her tight, only to then hold Madi out and make sure she hadn’t been hurt in the fall.

“I’ve got you.” She kissed Madi’s forehead over and over. “I’ve got you, my beautiful girl,” she wept. She held and rocked her daughter until Madi stopped crying. She wanted to hold her and never let go, but there was still a battle to be won.

Somehow, Octavia and Jasper were at her side. Bellamy wasn’t far behind. Since finding out they were related, the O and Jasper had been nearly inseparable. Having different jobs to do during the battle couldn’t keep them apart, and somehow Jasper had found his way into the thick of things, and from the looks of him, he’d already had a few fights. He had a deep gash over his eye that had already been bandaged, and a few minor cuts on his arms. Octavia was covered in gore, but after a quick assessment, Clarke realized that the younger alpha was untouched. There wasn’t a single scratch on her. 

Clarke’s attention was quickly diverted back to her daughter when the pup started to wiggle in her arms. The babe lifted her head then let if fall again into the crook of Clarke’s neck, and the alpha inhaled sharply when Madi’s little mouth started to suckle at her scent gland, ingesting her sire’s scent in the only way she knew how. With a pop, Madi let go, and over the din of the fighting surrounding them, the alpha would have sworn her tiny little daughter started to purr, causing a fresh flood of tears to stream down Clarke’s face.

During all of this, time seemed to stand still, but she came back to her senses when she heard Gustus bellowing at Aden. “Jump, Aden, jump. I will catch you.”

Ontari’s thugs were closing in on the boy, and the only option he had was to jump. There was no other escape for him.

He looked down at Gustus clearly terrified. Jumping from so high up was no small feat. “Jump, Aden,” Clarke and several other called from around him.

One of the gonas was just about to make a grab for Aden when he finally did what he was told. He launched himself over the railing, and for one second seemed to hang in the air before he fell at a frightening rate. As promised, Gustus caught the wiry boy. With a grunt, the giant of a man fell to one knee, but he righted himself almost instantly and placed a wobbly Aden on his feet. Clarke was only a little jealous of the man’s physical strength. He was barely phased by catching the boy whereas Clarke had probably broken something in her leg after catching her pup.

Aden swayed just a little as he walked over to Clarke. He was obviously pleased that he and Madi were alive, but he still looked frightened. 

“You have to get in there Wanheda. Ontari knows Heda is coming, and she’s ready for her.”

Clarke clasped Madi to her. She didn’t want to let go of the pup she was finally holding for the first time, but she would also never forgive herself if something happened to her mate. She knew she was going to have to hand Madi over and have someone else get her to safety.

Jasper was at her side in an instant, almost as if he knew what Clarke was about to do. “I’ll keep her safe for you, Clarke, I swear it.”

He and Clarke might have come to a new understanding, but she still didn’t fully trust the boy. She didn’t want to hand over her pup to him, but she also needed to go to her mate. Fortunately, Abby was still there, and the blonde’s relief was almost palpable.

Abby held out her arms. “Let me meet my grandpup.” 

Clarke clutched her daughter to her. “I love you, Madi. I love you so much.” She nuzzled her nose into the pup’s hair and breathed in deeply. “Be good for Mommy, okay?”

Clarke reluctantly handed Madi to her mother, and then she started barking orders. “Jasper, Octavia, and Indra go with my mom and make sure she gets Madi out of harm’s way. Gustus, you and the others are with me.” She started to turn but grabbed Jasper’s forearm instead, deciding to give him some of her trust. “Keep my mom and Madi safe, okay?”

“With my life, Clarke.”

Turning to Aden, she squeezed him to her. “Thank you for saving my pup.” She let him go. “Where will Lexa be heading? Where is Ontari?”

“Ontari has holed herself up in the Throne room, but Wanheda, she’s packed the room with her strongest alphas. There’s no way Heda will be able to get through all of them, not with the pheromones that will be directed at her. She’s strong, but she’s not that strong. No one is. Not by themselves.”

“Then we need to get up there.” Clarke didn’t think to wonder where the members of the Order were hiding.

Clarke looked Aden over. By some miracle, the boy still had the shock baton. She traded him one of her daggers for it. She knew without her mate nearby that she was no match for the men they would surely encounter in the tower. She kept the electrified weapon set to kill and then she started to jog toward the entrance of the Tower and yelped when she took a bad step on her right leg. Yup, something was definitely wrong with her knee, but she ignored the fact. She had to push on no matter how bad it hurt. Touching her right side, she noted that she was indeed bleeding again, but she ignored that too. 

The fighting at the walls and in the city seemed to be coming to an end. Clarke wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but it felt like at least a couple of hours had gone by since she and Lexa had first gotten to the wall. They had been surprised by the sheer number of Azgeda warriors that Ontari had in the city and had immediately found themselves in the thick of the fight. 

Clarke was no dummy. As soon as she started to fight, she knew something was different about her. She was moving far too fluidly and far to competently. She had looked at Lexa and realized that somehow she was sharing her mate’s innate ability to fight. There was no other explanation for it. She matched her mate move for move, and it seemed she had no way of controlling it, for which she was thankful, because she knew the second the fighting started that she would be no match for the Azgeda warriors coming her way.

Looking around, the blonde decided to backtrack to the entrance she’d seen Lexa go through. Heda’s men seemed to have it secure, and she saw that Tristan and his team was pouring into the building. Disregarding the pain in her side and leg, she ran over to him, keeping Aden near her.

With Aden and Gustus at her heels, she ran into the Tower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh. I am so glad to have this chapter is posted and that we are moving on. It ate me up and spit me out, but I am back to regular writing self again. 
> 
> Who out there has watched Bridgerton on Netflix? I know, I am actually a little late in watching it. I ask because the main female lead, Daphne, gave me Lexa vibes, like in a different fanfic, she could be Lexa's little sister or something. I kept watching her and thinking Lexa, ADC, the entire time. If you haven't watched, it is thoroughly entertaining, and almost...almost makes me want to wear a dress. 
> 
> Let me know what you thought of this chapter. Feedback on this one would be hugely appreciated. As always, I appreciate every comment and kudos.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the overwhelming response to last chapter. This one wasn't nearly so hard to write.

Chapter 17

Lexa almost fell as she leapt through the entrance of her Tower. She didn’t get the chance to appreciate that she was home for as soon as she stepped into the once sacred halls of her Tower, she felt the weight of burning dread settle over her. 

Bodies littered the floor around her, and she had to step carefully so as not to slip on the blood. Other than the dead on the floor, the passageway was empty. Behind her the fight raged on, and she was alarmed to find that her mate wasn’t at the back of her. No one was. There were men and woman clashing everywhere, and the fighting was so dense that no one else could make it through the doorway. 

“Skrish,” she whispered. She was tempted to make her way back out to find Clarke, but she hadn’t come this far to turn around now. She had to get to her pup, and the only way to do that was up. She could feel Madi’s presence stronger now that she was in the Tower, and she had to get to her. It felt like her daughter was being moved haltingly from room to room, and Lexa couldn’t make sense of it. 

She carefully passed rooms on the lower level, but they were all vacant. It wasn’t until she got to the lift that she found anyone alive. Four burly men, with symbolic facial scars scattered across their faces were waiting for her; Ontari’s men, and at their feet were the bodies of at least two warriors she knew personally, a young beta named Artigas who hailed from her own clan, and the body of the delinquent Zoe Monroe. 

Her breath hitched. How both of these young warriors had gotten so far in the fighting was beyond her, and it made her unbearably sad that Clarke and the others had lost their friend. Her warriors knew what to expect from battle, and her warriors knew that death faced them the second a battle started, but the young woman lying limply on the ground couldn’t have known what to expect, and Lexa was sure she hadn’t expected to die. 

One of the men at the lift, a gruff alpha standing heads above Lexa with no facial hair, not even eyebrows on his head, stepped forward. “Heda Ontari kom Azgeda is waiting for you, kwelen (weak) omega filth.”

The man was flooding the space with acrid alpha pheromones, as were the others standing with him. Lexa didn’t flinch. Instead, she ignored the men and knelt before the fallen delinquent. Slender fingers closed Zoe’s lifeless eyes. Heda then removed her red sash and used it to cover the delinquent’s body while covertly swiping the handgun at the fallen woman’s side and hiding it under her armor.

Lexa stood, tall and proud with her shoulders square. “Do you require my weapons?”

The Azgeda warrior snorted. “You can keep your weapons. They are no threat to our Commander.”

“Then take me to her,” Lexa said resolutely, knowing she was being led into a trap, but determined that this siege would end today.

The hairless man stepped onto the elevator with her as the other men moved to work the crank that would lift her to the higher levels of the Tower. As they passed the third floor, Lexa almost fell to her knees. Her pup was on this floor. The scent of Madi filled her nostrils, but so did the scent of fear. She could smell Aden, and while she also detected determination, there was no doubt that the boy was terrified. She had to hold in her scream when she suddenly heard her pup wail and could sense that Madi was falling. She wanted to weep. Her pup had been thrown from the balcony three stories up. There was no way her daughter would survive the fall. 

Practically dying inside, Lexa stood rigid, not showing any emotion on her face. She wanted to scream and gut the man standing next to her. She wanted to make the lift stop so she could find out what happened to her pup, but she didn’t. She didn’t need to. She was suddenly filled with the sense that her pup was okay. The bond between her and her pup, and her and Clarke, flooded her. Somehow, Keyron (the spirit) was on her side that day and without being able to see it, she knew her pup had fallen into her mate’s arms. Somehow her alpha was there when their daughter needed her most, and Clarke had caught the falling child. Lexa’s pup was safe and in her mate’s arms.

A low and menacing growl started in her throat. The Azgedan sneered at her. “Kwelen,” he said. It was the last utterance he would ever make. He dropped to the ground as Heda removed her dagger from his throat. 

“Kwelen, indeed,” Lexa snarked.

She stepped out of the elevator when it stopped, wiping her dagger clean of blood as she went. The hall to the Throne room was filled with alphas, and they were exuding a wall of dominance at her. Her knees wobbled imperceptibly, but she didn’t lose her stride. This was her house, and she would submit to no one here. 

The alpha at the front of the pack looked in the elevator and snarled when he saw the dead body. “You won’t be so brave in front of Heda.”

She kneed the man in the nuts. “And you won’t be siring any pups.” He bent over, grasping himself and more than one of Ontari’s men snickered at her actions.

Lexa strode into the Throne room, and this time she appeared floored by the cloud of pheromones in the room. Nearly twenty alphas stood behind Ontari who was sitting on the throne, and another fifty lined the walls of the room. The place was packed with alphas and their stench.

Lexa grimaced. She was strong, but she was not immune. Faced with at least seventy alphas, she started to sweat as she fought to remain upright. Instead of fighting, she dropped to her knees in front of her greatest enemy.

Ontari stood and approached. She ran her fingers through Lexa’s hair and harshly turned the omega’s head further to the side than it already was. “I knew you would bow to me.”

Lexa said nothing.

She let go of the omega and returned to her seat. “Now, we will wait for your alpha to arrive.”

Clarke ran into the Tower and tripped over a body, almost making her fall on her injured knee. She righted herself and wished she had time to look around. She could see ancient tapestries and other works of art hanging on the walls, and she longed to study them. Under her feet, the smooth worn floor was covered with rugs, threadbare in places, only now those rugs were covered in blood.

She followed the trail of bodies to the end of the hall and stopped so abruptly that Aden smacked into her back. 

Gustus was behind her, and Tristan’s team stood by with nothing to do as all the people in this hall were already dead.

“Where do we go?” Clarke asked frantically. Her eyebrows were pinched together, and her jaw clamped tight. Her side and leg made each step she took more and more painful. She could feel her mate high above her, but she had no idea how to ascend to such a height. There was no way, with the way she was feeling, that she would be able to climb that many stairs. As it was, she could feel herself getting tired and worried that her wound was bleeding too heavily.

Aden and Tristan pointed at the same time as Gustus moved forward. “We take that up,” Aden said as he pointed to the lift.

Clarke wanted to ask if they were kidding her, but she knew they were not. There were lifts on the Ark, of course there were, but they weren’t hand cranked. Already, Gustus and Tristan were dispatching Ontari’s men who had been standing at the terrifyingly flimsy looking crank. It wasn’t much of a fight since the men were trapped in the elevator shaft.

“H-how high up do we have to go?” Clarke asked nervously.

“Second floor from the top,” Tristan said as he positioned three men, and a number of others to guard them, around the crank shaft. Gustus and Aden ushered Clarke into the elevator, but not until Clarke stopped abruptly, looking at Lexa’s sash covering an all too familiar body.

Clarke gulped, and she fought to hold back tears she as carefully pulled the sash covering the body’s head. “Oh, Zoe.”

Clarke looked at those surrounding her. “None of this was ever supposed to happen.” She covered her friend again. “Yu gonplei ste odon (Your fight is over).”

With a new determination to end this day, Clarke stood. “Take me to Heda.”

Clarke stepped into the Tower lift ignoring the increasing pain in her side. “We are walking into a trap you know.” It was obvious to Clarke. The fighting outside had been fierce, but now that they were in Heda’s Tower, things were too easy, too calm.

“We are, but we are ready,” Gustus said confidently.

“What if they have already hurt her?” Clarke whimpered.

“Heda is strong. You need not worry for your mate.”

“I will always worry for her,” Clarke admitted. She let out an undignified squeak as the elevator started to move. She plastered herself to the wall.

Aden sidled up to her and leaned his comforting weight into her. “Don’t worry Wanheda. I have ridden up and down the lift hundreds of times. We will not fall.”

Clarke filled with anxiety; anxiety for her mate, and anxiety at having to trust the elevator not to fall. She had been in elevators before. The Ark had many, but those she trusted. Those were maintained by her father and his team. So, she appreciated the young Nightblood’s attempt to ease her fears. He enveloped her in his warm scent, and her apprehension went down a few notches.

Her breath caught at the sudden thought of her father though. Would he be proud of her in this moment when things around them could end up so bad if they failed? He had always been her biggest supporter, and he was always the shoulder she could rely on if she needed to express her fears. Clarke couldn’t help but think he might be disappointed that this was the moment she had led her people to.

She shook her head. She didn’t have time to think like that. In a few minutes, or maybe seconds because Clarke had no idea how long a trip to the top of the Tower would take, she would be in a fight not only for her life, but for that of her mate and her pup. Instead of wondering if her father would be proud, she instead called upon all the wisdom he had ever instilled in her, and she hoped that there was something there that would help her win this fight.

It turned out that a trip to the top of the Tower was agonizingly long when one was waiting to either die or finally, finally start living the rest of their life. The problem was that Clarke didn’t know which one it was going to be, and she was the first to admit she was scared shitless. 

Before the lift could fully stop, Clarke got out her sword and sent prayers to the aether that her mate was still okay. Aden took her by complete surprise when he had Gustus lift him up. The skinny little thing then scampered through a trap door at the top of the elevator compartment, and then he was gone. 

Clarke looked at Gustus, but all the man did was raise an eyebrow at her. “We go out swinging, sha?” Clarke asked.

“Sha, Wanheda.” In a truly shocking move, Gustus leaned forward and kissed Clarke on her forehead. “Remember who you are. You are the Commander of Death. Only you get to decide when your soul departs this Earth.”

She tilted her head at him in acknowledgement, and that feeling filled her again. The one she felt when she first smelled her pup outside of Polis, and Clarke didn’t know if it was because she was in close to her mate again, or if it was the spirit of Wanheda taking hold of her. All she knew was that there was a sudden flash of blue light from her, and it was met with a matching flash of red that she could see from under the elevator door.

“I am become death,” she whispered. “I am become death,” she said. “I am become death,” she yelled, as the door to the lift opened and she flew into a rage. “I am Wanheda,” she screamed as she wielded her sword, connecting with the body nearest her. 

Gustus was right beside her, and despite the hall being filled with Azgeda alphas and their stink, Clarke was unphased. She was a whirling demon of death mowing down alpha after alpha until the hall was painted with Azgedan blood. 

Down the passageway, she could see her mate kneeling before the alpha who could only be Ontari, and the sight of her mate, almost prostrate on the floor had her seeing red, literally. Lexa was exuding thin tendrils of red light. Her mate was not submitting to Ontari. She was waiting for Clarke to arrive. 

Clarke let out a war cry, and it was one that let out all the stress, anxiety, fear, and anger she had been holding in for such a long time. She was focused on the fighting, but in the back of her head, she knew if Raven had been able to hear her, the omega would be laughing and calling her Xena Warrior Princess, because the alpha was fairly certain that was exactly who she sounded like. 

Clarke grinned evilly at her next opponent. It was a large, muscular woman who had taken the custom of Azgeda scarification to the next level. There wasn’t one bit of exposed skin that wasn’t scarred. Clarke didn’t understand the fascination Ontari’s people had with disfiguring themselves. Costia and Echo had explained to her that different scars had different meanings, and all men and women who served the Azplana had to prove their loyalty by scarring themselves in one way or another. Each new scar was meant to be a badge of honor from their queen. Clarke wondered just what this woman had to do to earn all her scars.

“I guess you must be alpha bitch’s top dog, huh?” Clarke said as she ducked a blow from the woman. “I hope you aren’t the best there is because you are about to lose your head.” The blonde let loose like she never had before. The sweet scent of summer and sunshine filled the air as she poured out dominant pheromones. 

Every person in the hall dropped to their knees except for Gustus who was either far enough behind her to be affected, or maybe she was just that good at targeting her pheromonal attacks. The blonde didn’t know, and she didn’t care. Clarke took one second to look at the giant warrior on her knees before her. “I am Wanheda, and your death is mine,” she promised. Swinging her sword, she lopped off the woman’s head and used her foot to lob it into the Throne room. It rolled past Lexa and landed at Ontari’s feet. The Usurper’s fury was obvious.

Clarke wavered slightly. The amount of energy it was taking to keep the alphas in the hall on their knees was starting to wane. Before she could get too tired, she strode into the Throne room, and had Gustus shutter the doors behind her, locking her, her mate, and Gustus in the room with over seventy well-trained alphas, and the woman who dared to sit in Lexa’s throne. She eased off on her pheromones, and as soon as she did was struck by the powerful ones that hung in the air from the Azgeda alphas surrounding her. She’d never felt such power before, but instead of thinking of Azgeda as strong, it made her think of just how weak they were that Ontari would need so many men to make one omega submit. 

Little did they know that her omega wasn’t nearly as affected as they thought.

Clarke looked around. Every man and woman loyal to Ontari was stone-faced, showing no emotion at all. Ontari, on the throne, had a smirk on her face even though the anger showed in her eyes. It was apparent that despite luring Clarke and Lexa to her exactly the way she wanted, things weren’t going quite as she planned.

The blonde’s eyes roved furiously over the room. She gave Ontari the attention she deserved, but also the room itself, looking for things to help her, Lexa, and Gustus out of this situation because for all her bravado, Clarke could feel herself starting to weaken. She knew that if this didn’t end soon, she was going to fall on her knees because of sheer exhaustion and blood loss, so she took a quick assessment of the room.

Next to Ontari was a wooden stand with a clay pitcher and a cup filled with water, and behind her were curtains that billowed in the light wind giving Clarke a brief glimpse of a balcony. From where the blonde stood, she couldn’t hear the sounds of fighting anymore. Above her was an air duct, and she hoped beyond hope that Aden wasn’t in there scheming something that would end up with him getting killed. 

“Clarke kom Skaikru,” Ontari said, drawing Clarke’s attention to her. “I have heard so much about you.” The scar-faced alpha casually crossed her legs. She held out her hand. “That crown on your head belongs to me.”

“Nope,” Clarke said boldy. “You can’t have it both ways. You can’t pretend to be Heda and try to be Azplana (the Ice Queen) at the same time. Besides, this is over, Ontari. Your forces have lost. Polis belongs to the real Heda,” Clarke said more calmly than she was feeling. 

Ontari stabbed her dagger into the throne. “I am Heda!” she screamed, unhinged. “Lexa is not Heda. She is a pathetic, weak omega who is bowing before the rightful Commander.”

“That’s not what it looks like to me.” Clarke reached out her hand for Lexa to take, and just as before, when the red and blue light seeping from them touched, it flashed white. Everyone gasped, even Ontari. The omega easily regained her feet. 

Lexa stepped forward and addressed the people assembled in the room. “I AM YOUR HEDA,” she boomed. “Bow before me, and I will let you live. Continue to support this usurper, and you will die…here in this room.” She swung an arm out toward Ontari. “Is this woman really worth your death?”

A few of Ontari’s gonas (warriors) looked at the mated pair in awe. The flash of light was gone, but to some it seemed as if they still glowed. Others chortled, thinking that the war was already over. Most ramped up their attempt to dominate her. One scrawny omega, her guard, and a bleeding alpha were no match for the alphas in the room.

Clarke let go of Lexa’s hand and struggled to walk toward Ontari while making it look effortless. The other alpha stood and raised her weapon. 

“Relax. I am just getting some water. Killing your weaklings has left me parched.” She lifted Ontari’s already full glass and drank it down with one gulp. “Ah.” She smacked her lips.

Ontari was too shocked by the blonde’s brazen move to stop her. 

Clarke lifted the pitcher and took it with her as she returned to her place next to Lexa. She grabbed Lexa’s hand and let it brush against the shock baton at her hip. In a show, she gripped Lexa’s hip and pulled her to her. She kissed her omega first before whispering, “Make sure you stay away from any water I spill.”

“So,” Clarke said, turning back toward Ontari. “How’s this going to go down?” She let go of Lexa’s hand and nonchalantly put it on her hip, setting the shock baton to its lethal setting. “Are we all going to kill each other, because if we are, I would kind of like to get on with it.” 

Ontari smirked and opened her mouth to speak only to snarl when Lexa interrupted her. “Or maybe we could challenge Ontari to a fight.” Lexa raised her eyebrow in challenge. “You are supposedly top alpha,” Lexa addressed the Azgeda woman who was probably a few years younger than herself. “If you are worthy of being Heda, then surely you should be able to dispatch me and my mate without any problems.”

“Kill the alpha and the guard,” Ontari roared from her seat on the throne. This day was not going as she had planned. When Lexa easily stood under the dominance of her men, she knew she was in trouble. Having Wanheda at the omega’s side didn’t help. She was getting nervous and angry, and if it was the last thing she did, she would kill the omega that she should have slain more than ten months ago. If she survived this, she would have the Order’s heads for talking her out of killing this whelp. “Leave the omega for me.” 

Clarke shot out a hand to Lexa and Gustus. “Hold,” she commanded. 

She threw the pitcher of water at the largest group of alphas as they started to approach, weapons in hand. Every eye watched dumbly as it arched through the air. With an underwhelming crash, it shattered on the ground, sending water cascading all over the warriors and the floor. 

“Ai laik Wanheda.” Clarke had the shock baton buzzing and flying at the nearest wet alpha in an instant. The warrior jumped back just in time for the baton to miss him, but it didn’t matter. The second the device clattered to the floor every alpha that was standing in the water was seizing where they stood, electrocuted and dead in an instant. 

Lexa waited until the last man dropped before moving over to the other side of the room where the other half of Ontari’s men stood in absolute shock at what just happened. 

She drew her dual swords. “Make your choice. Bow to me or die for her.” She could see it in their eyes, they were petrified to die like their brothers had on the other side of the room. They were going to kneel to her, but before the first person could bend a knee, Ontari yelled out.

“I challenge you, Lexa kom Trikru…and your mate. Oso gonplei gon de wamplei (We fight to the death) …and when I win, I will take your pup and make her mine, and I will bend her mind until it breaks. I will make her the perfect little soldier to do all my dirty work, and then when I tire of her, I will kill her.” She smiled wickedly at Clarke. “When you are dead, I will tear off your head and take the crown.”

Clarke surged at Ontari, but Lexa held her back. “Accepted, but we do this now.”

Ontari’s men instinctively moved out of the way, backing into the walls of the room. They might be from Azgeda, but none would interfere now, not after a challenge had been made. To do so would bring dishonor to the challenger and themselves. 

Normally, the participants of a challenge would have a day to rest or train before the fight, but that was not going to be the case this time, and Ontari thought that gave her the advantage. She looked at the mated pair and scoffed. The alpha, Wanheda, was bleeding from her side, and despite trying to hide it, she was limping badly. She was already weakening. 

The omega, Ontari hated to admit, was going to be the more formidable opponent. The Azgedan alpha had been studying the Trikru woman for years. She knew which ambassadors were in her pocket, and which ones could be plied away from her. She knew when Lexa went to bed each night, and that she spent her heats alone. She even knew how she fought. 

Nia had made sure of that. Anya may have been Lexa’s seda (teacher), but the alpha was not the only one to train the Nightblood. There were others, and it was an easy task to lure them away from Polis to train with Ontari deep in the capital of the Ice Nation. All it took was the promise of favors and money to tempt the omega’s instructors away from the city and to the frozen north. A couple of them the queen had rewarded generously, but the others lost their heads when Ontari learned everything she could from them. The queen could not risk them returning to Polis and bragging about the riches they received for training a stray Natblida.

Lexa watched as Clarke moved over to her fallen shock baton. She lifted it up and handed it to the nearest gona who hesitated to take the thing that had just killed so many people in one shot. 

“Don’t worry. It’s useless now. It shorted itself out.” The man still took the device carefully. “If we are going to do this, Onti,” Ontari snarled at the nickname, “don’t you think you should order your men to clear the bodies out of the way?”

It was obvious that Ontari didn’t like Clarke making suggestions, but she did as asked and commanded that the bodies be moved.

“Good,” Clarke said with satisfaction, rankling the other alpha even further. Lexa wanted to smile. Her mate was putting on a good show and making Ontari angry. The blonde had been doing that from the start. It would make the false Commander sloppy during the fight. “Now, let’s get this show on the road. I am bleeding, getting tired, and I would like to make love to my mate after her solid victory over you.”

This time Lexa did smile, but she worried that Clarke’s bravado was just that, hot air full of bluster. She worried for her some, but then she thought of the battle down below and of her alpha’s performance. Clarke had matched her move for move, showing a skill that belied her true skill level, and the omega wasn’t sure if it was their bond, or some kind of link between Heda and Wanheda. She hoped that whatever it was showed up again in a few minutes because otherwise she feared she could lose her mate this day. 

The blonde alpha reached out her hand for her mate, and as soon as their hands met, Lexa’s worries quieted down. She felt it, their connection. 

“Ogud? (Ready)?” Clarke asked.

“Ogud.”

They took up a fighting stance, and Clarke gave Lexa a grin when it was exactly the same as hers only her sword was in her left hand while Lexa had out her dual weapons.

“What are you two, the wonder twins or something?” Ontari snarked at their shared stand. The alpha got out her own weapon. It was a wicked looking long sword with a slightly curved blade. It reminded Clarke of samurai swords from movies she had seen.

The false Commander lifted her sword and mocked them by taking the same position, so Clarke took it a step further and beckoned the alpha to her by lifting her right hand and tipping her fingers up in a clear signal to come and get them. 

With a roar, Ontari did. She leapt into action immediately, singling out Clarke and swinging her sword. 

The alpha was fast, and she was strong, stronger than Clarke, and when the blonde lifted her sword to meet Ontari’s, the clash of metal almost had her buckling. Lexa was at her defense in an instant, but not before the Azgadan punched out her hand, connecting with Clarke’s already bleeding side. 

The blonde grunted and almost dropped her sword, and it was only thanks to Lexa stepping in that she was saved from getting skewered by the Ice bitch. 

All of Lexa’s attention was now on Ontari. The alpha’s sudden and fast attack had taken her by surprise, which it shouldn’t have, but it wouldn’t happen again. She was concerned for her mate, but she needed to be Heda now, not Lexa the mated omega.

She brandished her swords, let out a war cry and rained a volley of hits on the alpha allowing her mate time to recover, but she was completely taken aback when Ontari also matched her move for move. No matter how Lexa attacked, the alpha was able to defend herself, even getting in a few slices of her own. 

Lexa and Ontari had been battling for a minute or two before Clarke was back in action. She felt like her side was bleeding profusely, and she was certain her knee was the size of a cantaloupe, but she came to Lexa’s aid just as Ontari swung her blade again. She would have cut Lexa deeply if the blonde hadn’t pushed her out of the way, taking the cut herself. It would have been a deep slice to her shoulder if not for the pauldron Lexa had given her earlier in the morning.

Clarke let out an unearthly howl and kicked Ontari in the chest. The move had the alpha stumbling back, but it also landed Clarke on the ground, clutching her leg in pain. “Fuck,” Clarke screamed.

“Klark,” Lexa yelled, jumping in front of her downed mate. Something seemed to take over Heda, and a new resolve shown in her eyes. She launched an attack on Ontari that had the woman backing up the stairs toward the throne. The girl almost stumbled on the step, but somehow, she maintained her balance and was able to initiate a counterattack.

Clarke watched from the floor as she tried to regain her feet. “Come on, suck it up,” she said to herself. She looked around the room at the gona lining the walls and was pleased to see that none looked like they were going to interfere with the challenge. Gustus gave her a thumbs-up letting her know she had this, and Clarke briefly wondered if the thumbs-up was grounder gesture or something he had learned from one of the members of Skaikru.

Struggling to her feet, she sucked in a deep breath and forced herself to forget about her pain. She charged up the steps, weapon in hand, and together Heda and Wanheda forced Ontari back. 

Ontari gave as good as she got, and it was no easy task, but eventually the trio stumbled through the curtains at the back of the room and landed on the balcony. Everyone in the room moved so they could watch the fight.

Lexa and Clarke shared a look and knew what to do. Both women coordinated their attack on Ontari now, forcing the girl to back up even further, and the Ice alpha gasped when her back hit the railing of the balcony. She had nowhere else to go.

In a desperate move, Ontari pretended to single out Lexa, only to shift her blade to Clarke as soon as Lexa moved to deflect the attack. Her weapon nailed the blonde in her knee sending her sprawling once again, but this time Clarke got up immediately. There were tears of pain streaming down her face, and her face was bright red. Now the blonde was truly pissed.

She looked one more time at her mate then pressed her own attack, and together they were able to pin Ontari to the balcony railing once more.

“You can’t win this, Ontari,” Lexa gasped. “Give up, submit to me, and end this. Otherwise, you will die.”

“I will never submit to you,” Ontari screeched. She swung her sword one last time in a wide arc making both Lexa and Clarke duck, and when they did, they each leaned in to grab one of Ontari’s legs, lifting the woman up and sending her over the railing of the balcony. They both watched as the alpha fell to her death down on the streets far below. 

Lexa stepped away from the railing, but Clarke was clutching it for dear life. The last of her energy had fizzled out, and if she let go, she was going to drop. “Lex…our pup is safe and with my mom. Go take care of the Order…I’m…I’m just going to rest here for a little while.” The alpha let go of the rail and slid to the floor.

“Klark.” Lexa yelled.

Clarke was beyond hearing her mate. She was already unconscious.

“Gustus,” Lexa roared. “Ge ai fisa Abby nau (get me Doctor Abby now).”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know your thoughts. You know I love to see what you think.
> 
> Total random question. Do you love or hate sushi? We finally had some tonight after abstaining for almost a year because takeout is just not the same as dining in. Let's just say, we won't wait almost a year again.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew. It took me all day to get to this, but I am finally posting it.
> 
> Thank you all for the comments and support for this story. Our characters get a small break in this chapter before they deal with the Order in the next one. 
> 
> Happy reading.

Chapter 18

Lexa was on the balcony pushing Clarke’s blue sash against the wound in her side. It wasn’t bleeding as badly as she thought but based on the blood saturating her mate’s clothing and armor, it had been recently. 

“Klark, please wake up,” Lexa begged, a distinct tremble in her voice when she called to her mate. Over the years, Lexa had seen many, many people die, and she’d been able to cut herself off from the emotions that went with that, but having her mate lying motionless in her arms was flooding her with feelings she thought long buried. Keyron, please don’t let her die.

Only moments later, Aden came bursting through the door of the Throne room with Abby hot on his heels. It turned out the omega boy had been in the air vent, but as soon as the challenge and Clarke’s struggle started, he found his way out of the tower and to Doctor Griffin telling her that Clarke needed her.

Behind them was the host of alphas who had been locked out of the Throne room after Clarke made all of them submit to her. Gustus had opened the door as soon as Ontari fell to her death thinking he needed to run for Abby himself. By some luck, the gonas in the hall, and those remaining in the Throne room were warriors with honor. Ontari had lost the fight, and all would bow to their new ‘old’ Heda. 

“Gustus, where is she?” Abby wheezed. She’d nearly had a heart attack on the elevator, especially when it started moving faster than expected. When Aden ran to fetch Abby, Octavia, Jasper, Bellamy, and Anya all came running with them into the tower. With the help of several of Heda’s men, an entire team took charge of lifting the elevator as quickly as possible. Raven and Harper had to wait for the elevator to come back down to get them which might have been a good thing. With the scent of fear coming off Abby, Madi was squirming in Raven’s arms.

“Shh, little bit. You are going to see your nomons very soon,” Raven cooed at the infant in her arms.

Gustus pointed to the balcony and Abby wasted no time sprinting past the throne and through the flowing curtains. 

“Clarke,” Abby yelled as she slid to her knees next to her daughter.

“Abby,” Lexa cried. “She’s so pale.”

“She’s lost a lot of blood,” Abby said while checking the alpha’s pulse. It was weak and thready, but it was there. Looking down, she spotted Clarke’s swollen knee, but she had to ignore that for now. She took a pair of scissors from her medical kit and cut away Clarke’s shirt. Her armor had already been removed by Lexa by the time everyone got there. 

The others in the room looked on as Abby started to work on her daughter. “Jasper,” Abby called out. “Do you remember how to start an IV?”

“Yes, ma’am. I do.”

“Then get over here and start a line. Hook it up to that bag of saline.”

Jasper grabbed the IV setup and went to work.

“We need to get her off the floor. Where can we take her?”

“To…to my quarters.” Lexa got to her feet then changed her mind about where to go. “No, not there, it will stink of Ontari. Follow me.”

Gustus leaned over and easily picked up the unconscious alpha. Clarke’s body hung limply in his arms. He charged out of the room with her. He already had an idea of where Lexa wanted to take Clarke. It was to the chambers directly across from Heda’s own.

Clarke woke up in a panic. She was alone in a bed, in a room that smelled unusual to her. Her head was muzzy, her eyes unfocused, and the pains in her side and knee were nearly unbearable. She whimpered and tried to sit up.

“No, hodnes, stay still.” Blue eyes searched the room until she found her mate who was sitting in a chair next to the bed holding a squirming bundle. An IV line of black blood was running from the omega into Clarke.

Despite looking worried, Lexa looked radiant. She had a glow to her and a look in her eyes that Clarke had never seen before. For maybe the first time ever, Lexa looked well and truly happy.

“M-Madi,” Clarke slurred.

Lexa uncovered the swaddled pup’s head. “D-did Aden tell you what he did?” Clarke whispered. She couldn’t seem to find her voice just yet.

Lexa gave Clarke a smile while she carefully moved the pup, her IV line, and herself to the edge of the bed. “Yes, and it earned him a smack upside the head and then a crushing hug.”

Clarke stared hard at her mate. She had an almost agonizing need to hold Lexa to her, but it was beat out by an even stronger need to hold her pup, except that she didn’t want to make Lexa let her go. She whimpered, and instead of asking for what she really wanted, instead she asked, “Wha,” she had to lick her lips, “What happened to the Order?”

Lexa snorted making little Madi wiggle in her arms again. “As you know, I sent Echo and Costia to ‘find’ them, but word of Ontari’s death got to them first, so instead of using their pompous righteousness to insist upon my reimprisonment or death, they were suddenly effusive in their desire to have me back on the throne. Apparently, they did not like having their precious city of Polis and their directives shut out by the young Azgedan upstart who they had welcomed into their folds.”

Clarke would have snorted too if she weren’t so tired. She squirmed so that she could get her hand loose from the covers holding it down. She reached for Lexa’s and drew it to her. Her eyes roved over Lexa’s face. 

“You have a plan. I can see it in your eyes.”

“Of course, I do.” As if sensing Clarke’s building need to touch her pup, Lexa shifted carefully to lie down next to her alpha, moving Madi so that the little girl was pressed between them. 

Clarke sighed in relief at the contact. She wanted desperately to look at the entirety of her pup. She needed to see all of her, but she was just too tired to move, and it was making her feel like a bad sire, so she struggled to move to her side until a restraining hand stopped her.

“Shh, niron. Here.” Lexa lifted Madi so that the pup could rest on Clarke’s chest. A tiny coo of satisfaction left the child as she wriggled until she was comfortable, resting her downy head on top of her sire.

Lexa lifted the soft blanket swaddling her daughter so that Clarke could rest her hands on the pup’s back. Somehow her daughter was already dressed in a onesie that could only have come from Skaikru. It was a light-yellow thing with little rocket ships on it. Raven, Clarke thought. 

“Will you tell me your plan?” Clarke asked as she yawned, fighting to keep her eyes open.

“Later, you need to rest, just know that the Order will get exactly what is coming to them.”

Clarke yawned again. “I don’t want to sleep,” she grumped. 

“You lost a lot of blood, ai tombom (my heart). You need time to recover.”

Clarke eyed the IV tube filled with Lexa’s black blood. “How…how is it that I can take your blood?” It hadn’t worked the other way around when the alpha had wanted to donate her blood to Lexa, so why did it work the other way around? 

Lexa leaned in to kiss her alpha on her temple, moving a lock of blonde hair out of the way. “It harkens back to days of old, I suppose. Omega Natblidas have always been able to give blood to their alpha mate; when the,” Lexa looked for the right words, “when the roles of alphas and omegas were more traditional where alphas were the providers and the fighters, and omegas were the healers and the nurturers. Who knows how it was figured out, but somehow they learned that only an omega with Nightblood could give their life’s blood to their alpha mate. It doesn’t work the other way around. I don’t know why.”

“Oh,” Clarke said sleepily, but forced herself to keep her eyes open.

“Titus and the Order are thrilled by this,” Lexa growled.

Clarke blinked. She didn’t understand why that would be.

Lexa sensed her confusion. “You will be a Nightblood now, Klark. The alpha Nightblood to the omega Commander. I am sure they think to use you in some way to keep me under their control.” The omega growled. “Good thing their little secret is going to be exposed soon.”

“H-how?” 

“They are planning a celebration…to commemorate the return of their beloved Commander,” Lexa said bitterly. “We will expose them for who they truly are then.”

Clarke shook her head. “Not that,” she slurred although she was pleased Lexa had a plan. “How…Nightblood?”

Lexa’s eyes widened in understanding. “Moba (sorry) niron.” This time the omega leaned over to caress and kiss her pup who had fallen asleep on Clarke’s chest, content and happy to be with her parents finally.

“The Presh Jus (Sacred Blood/Nightblood) will fundamentally change you, Klark. You will heal faster. You will be stronger. Your senses will be more enhanced.”

Clarke was shocked. The implications of what this meant for her and what it probably had meant to omega Nightbloods just after the bombs dropped was staggering. She had visions of Nightblood omegas being forcefully mated just so alphas could become a Nightblood too. She shuddered thinking of the lengths alphas probably went to in order to get their hands on an omega Natblida. 

Sensing her distress, Lexa said, “I admit, it’s one of the good things the Order did. They gathered the Nightbloods to them and made it punishable by death for an omega Nightblood to be mated without their consent, although it was probably done because they didn’t want more Nightblood alphas running around than they could handle. The Order has always enjoyed too much control over us, and really everyone.”

“And, by giving me your blood, I am betting the Order thinks they will be able to have some control over me once my blood is black like yours, thus giving them more control over you as Commander.”

Lexa gave Clarke a wicked smile. She’d never seen such a devious look on her mate’s face. “You would be correct. I have spoken briefly with the members of the Order. It was Titus who suggested I give you my blood,” she leaned and kissed her alpha on the lips this time, “which, by the way, I had already told your mother I would do without needing any prompting from that insufferable ass.”

Lexa shifted again so that she could be in more contact with her mate. “Little does Titus know that the Order’s reign over all of us will be coming to an end soon.”

Clarke didn’t hear that last bit. She was already fast asleep again.

Lexa looked down at her mate in wonder. It was only recently that she dared to dream she would see a sight like this where her pup was nestled into her sire’s chest. It hadn’t been a dream she was willing to think of while imprisoned. She had only hoped that one day her pup would find herself in her sire’s arms. The omega had never thought that she’d bear witness to such a thing. 

When she had escaped from Polis with Nyko’s help, she never thought she would live to see this day, and her heart was practically bursting with the knowledge that she would now live to see her mate grow old and her child flourish. 

She startled when she heard the door click open, and Anya and Abby walked in. Anya gave her the biggest grin she had ever seen on her seda’s face when the alpha took in the sight before her of the little family resting on the bed.

Abby’s face was no better, and she radiated a silent and accepting love as she unhooked both Lexa and Clarke from the IV. 

“Your rooms have been readied, Heda,” Anya informed her Commander. “You can move back in as soon as you are able.”

It was a huge relief. Lexa hadn’t yet stepped foot into her chambers, but a very vocal Raven had told her how bad they had stunk of their previous, short-term resident. From the sounds of it, Ontari had scent marked just about everything. The one good thing was that Ontari had taken Lexa’s belongings and shoved into a nearby room. She had not destroyed them, nor had she slept in Lexa’s bed. That too had been pushed out of the room.

It was comforting to know that in mere hours, she would be able to sleep in the bed she had called her own since becoming Commander without knowing that the alpha usurper had sullied it with her stench.

It was also a huge comfort to know that Gustus and Indra had been able to procure a cradle and had put it at the bedside. Eventually, she and Clarke would set up a nursery, but having been denied their pup for so long, there wasn’t a chance in hell that they were going to let their daughter out of their sight for probably a long time to come. As it was, she had a feeling she and her alpha would be hard pressed to ever let Madi go. The longing to touch and feel their pup was too overwhelming right now. 

It was a week later, and Lexa was sitting in her throne, Clarke standing beside her on the left, Anya on her right, and Gustus and Indra in front of and two steps below them. Heda’s bodyguard and wormana had their weapons on their backs and spears in their hands, ready to defend their Commander if needed. Titus and the Order were begrudgingly standing before her, displeased with the arrangement of the people before them. 

In their desire to see an alpha sitting on the throne again, they had argued strenuously that it should be Clarke to sit in Lexa’s spot, even while the omega remained Commander. Inside, Lexa had been furious, but outwardly she projected her calm omega demeanor. She stood by as Clarke politely refused their demands, just as her alpha had repeatedly refused to meet with the Order in private. 

Numerous members had asked for private audiences with Clarke, but each time she refused stating that it was not her place to interfere with the running of Polis and that if the Order had matters that they wished to discuss with her, it would be in the presence of her omega and Heda. 

The other thing that royally pissed the Order off was that Lexa was sitting on her throne with her pup in her lap. She and Clarke had no desire to leave their pup under someone else’s care, even if that person would have been the alpha’s mother. They might have considered it, but it was Clarke who pointed out that the Order would likely be miffed at seeing a Commander holding their child while sitting on the throne. 

“Oh, the distaste it will leave in their mouths. It will be so worth the looks on their faces.” Clarke had snarked. Lexa and the others had quite agreed.

So now, the Order was pretending to grovel at her feet while attempting to hide their disdain at what stood before them. It was already clear they were trying to devise plots to change their current situation, but they could see no way out of their existing predicament, at least not yet. They would have to bide their time. Until then, they would play this charade with the Commander. 

Unsurprisingly, Titus was trying to reingratiate himself with Heda, or at least he was pretending to. He had asked for private meetings with Heda and wanted to provide council, but Lexa had rebuffed these attempts, so instead he tried to make Lexa see why the Order had made the decisions they had made. Listening to him made her want to slice open his throat, but instead, held her blade at her side. She was waiting until she could expose the Order’s secret. In the end, she enjoyed watching Titus squirm while doing all of this. With Clarke constantly at her side, the man was unable to use his influence to regain her favor. 

Lexa stood from her throne and descended the two steps to stand in between Gustus and Indra, but not before handing her precious daughter to her mate. She even leaned in for a quick kiss from Clarke just to anger the Order. 

She radiated a power like none she had before while standing before the men and women of the Order. She felt it, and the others in the room could as well, and while the Order wouldn’t admit it, it was because Lexa had her family standing behind her.

With her hands behind her back, and in her full Heda attire, including her warpaint, Lexa paced back and forth before the Order. “The celebration starts in four hours, and I expect every single one of you to be in attendance.” 

There was grumbling among the members. Most official meetings and celebrations did not require their full attendance.

“This is not a request,” Lexa stated firmly. “Attendance is mandatory.”

She stopped in front of Titus. “You will admit your mistakes in bringing Ontari kom Azgeda here, and you will apologize to our people and the ambassadors. Under her brief rule, the citizens, especially those in our city…your city, suffered because of her. The people of Polis became prisoners and laborers in their own home under her rule, and thus under you. You will make amends to our people if you want to regain their trust,” she moved so that she could look every member of the Order in the eyes, “and that will begin with a show of solidarity in front of them before the celebration of my return begins.”

Begrudgingly, they all nodded and said, “Sha, Heda.”

She waved a dismissive hand at them. “Go with the knowledge that if you do not attend, I will have Anya and her men round you up and force you to be there. Trust me, you do not want that to happen.”

A few members sneered as they retreated. Titus, of course, tried to speak with Lexa again. “Heda, if I may…”

“You may not, Titus. I have no need for your council right now. I need to prepare myself for my people. Surely you can hold your tongue until after the celebration.” 

Titus held his breath. He was not used to Lexa speaking to him this way. He had been sure he would be able to slither back into her good graces, but that was not the case. He was going to have to figure out a different way to get back on Lexa’s good side. He bowed his head and slid out of the room.

Once the doors of the Throne room were closed and they could speak freely, Clarke reluctantly handed her pup over to Lexa when her omega beckoned. Lexa cradled Madi in one arm, but then gathered the alpha into her side with the other. 

Lexa looked at Indra. “I want you to make sure that every alpha who came down to the prison to try and make me submit during my imprisonment is at the celebration. Make sure they are at the front of the crowd. The members of the Order are to stand at my back.”

Lexa handed Indra of list with each alpha’s name on it. There were more than fifty alphas complicit in the Order’s role of trying to break her during her captivity. “I also want the guards who were responsible for withholding food and water from me near the front. I know they were following orders, but they were supposed to be loyal to me, not to mention the fact that they withheld sustinence from me while pregnant, only giving me enough to ensure Madi’s survival. Imprisonment is meant to be a punishment, but it is not meant to be torture, and that is what they did. That is what they allowed, and I will not stand back and let anyone responsible for my suffering to leave the celebration alive. Is that understood?”

“Sha Heda. I will round them up. Em na ste an koma gon dula op disha gon yu (It will be an honor to do this for you).” Indra bowed and left the room.

Clarke shivered as she watched her mate bark out orders. She had recovered remarkably fast with her mate’s blood coursing through her veins. Twice Lexa had caught the alpha pricking her finger so that she could see the black blood that was now her own. She had been fascinated. So too had her mother. Abby had taken vial after vial of blood from Clarke to study it, with the alpha’s permission, of course. 

Lexa had growled and almost ordered her to stop; the implications of what could be done with that blood making her angry, but then Abby assured her it was simply for her own curiosity, and the older alpha guaranteed Lexa that anything she found would be passed to Heda first, and then destroyed if Lexa deemed it necessary.

Had it been anyone else, Heda wouldn’t have forgiven it, but she trusted Abby implicitly, and knew Abby would not abuse any knowledge she gained from studying the Presh Jus.

Clarke had been watching her mate intently since Lexa had handed Madi over. To be honest, she was getting aroused. She had seen the mask of Heda slip over her mate many times, but never had she seen her strength and her power on display quite like it was now. 

Her mate was fierce when dealing with the Order and Titus, and she couldn’t wait to see what happened when her omega revealed the Order’s secret later that day. She imagined each man and woman bowing before Heda like never before because, from what she was told, the Order did not bow, not on their knees. They would show respect and begrudging submission by tipping their heads to their Heda, but that was it. After today, that would change. Before the day was through, Clarke would ensure that everyone bowed to her mate before Lexa did whatever it was she had planned for them.

Watching her mate command the Order to leave, and then watching as Indra did her bidding without even a second thought was thrilling to the alpha. 

She had readjusted Madi in her arms and peppered her with kisses while watching her mate strut around the room as Lexa growled out orders. She had to squeeze her legs together lest she grab her mate where she stood so she could take her on her throne. 

Ever since her recovery, she had been longing for her mate, but Abby had forbidden it. The injury to Clarke’s side had originally not been too bad, but the continued battle, her trek up to the top of the tower, and the fight with Ontari had opened it up, and it had gotten infected. 

Her knee was not much better. Under her trousers, she wore a brace not unlike Raven’s. After a few tests, Abby had informed her that she had torn the ACL in her knee and would eventually require surgery. Until then, she would have to wear the brace. Clarke wasn’t pleased, but at least she hadn’t been forbidden to walk on it, and she hadn’t been forced to use crutches. Raven, of course, had been gleeful at Abby’s request to make Clarke a brace. “Now we can be brace buddies,” she had chuckled out. 

Madi whimpered from her perch in Clarke’s arms. The alpha knew exactly what she wanted and turned her pup so that the tiny omega was facing outward. When not in Lexa’s arms, Madi wasn’t comfortable for long if she couldn’t see her nomon, let alone touch her. 

Clarke bounced Madi in her arms. “Let nomon finish her work,” the alpha whispered into the cutest little ear she had ever seen, “and then you will be back in her arms.”

The blonde had no idea if Madi understood, but her words did seem to calm her.

It was funny, because Clarke felt like Lexa got all Madi’s attention, while Lexa argued the same thing. In the end, it worked out that their time holding their daughter was probably an even 50/50 split between the two of them, and their friends and family grumped that they never got to hold the precious little girl.

When they finally left the throne room, Lexa walked hand in hand with Clarke back to their suite. 

“You have a big role to play later,” Lexa reminded her alpha. “Do you think you are sufficiently recovered to do what you need to?”

Clarke gave her a lopsided smirk. “It sounds like you are doubting the restorative benefits of the blood you gave me.” The alpha gently hip-checked her mate. “Of course, I am ready. I am more than ready to make those nomonjokas (mother fuckers) pay for what they did to you. Honestly, it will be a pleasure to force them to their knees.”

Lexa was undeniably relieved to hear this. Clarke was so unlike any alpha she had ever met. Most alphas relished the chance to show off their strength and their dominance, but not Clarke. She wielded her power like the soft bristled paint brush. She was subtle in her influence over people, and only exerted her control and authority when necessary with angry but quick strokes. Clarke was a no-nonsense type of person, and she didn’t like to linger on the decisions she had to make, however, once a decision was made, she stuck to her guns and didn’t falter. It was refreshing to the omega that her alpha had never used her designation to posture or lord her strength over others who weren’t as fortunate to be just like her. 

It almost made Lexa wonder if Clarke didn’t desire a life without designations like the members of the Order had, except that in their world that wouldn’t work unless everyone was designation-less, and then that would lead to a whole different set of power struggles and an entirely new hierarchy of things. 

Lexa shook her head. It was clear that to be designation-less would not work. The Order had proven that, although, she wouldn’t mind living in a world that wasn’t dictated by heats and ruts. Thinking of ruts and heats, Lexa made a mental note to speak with Abby about her heat. She was well overdue for hers, and she was beginning to worry that after what she suffered during her imprisonment, and because of the traumatic birth of Madi, that she might not have one again.

Her stomach clenched. She knew there was a good likelihood that she wouldn’t be able to bear Clarke another pup, and that was something she needed to speak with Abby about as well, but she had never shared a heat with anyone, let alone Clarke, and it was an experience she was desperate to know with her mate, her beautiful blonde alpha.

“Hey” Clarke said, interrupting her spiraling thoughts, “where’d you go?”

Lexa’s instinct was to shrug and say nowhere, but instead she told Clarke the truth about her fears, and Clarke being the wonderful, caring, sensitive mate that she was, crushed the omega to her being careful not to crush Madi in the process. Soothing pheromones enveloped Lexa. 

Clarke promised that the next day they would go and discuss things with Abby, and then she pointed out to the omega that she was overdue for her rut too. She’d only had the one while hiding away in the forest, and since then nothing. 

It was a curious case of a heatless and rutless omega and alpha, but if anyone could get to the bottom of it, it was Abby. “Besides,” Clarke tried to calm her mate’s fears, “I am fairly sure they will come back. We’ve just been too ill, too stressed, and frankly, too damn busy for your heat and my rut to hit. When things calm, I am betting we will hit in sync, and we will have no choice but to let Mom babysit because we will be fucking like rabbits as Raven likes to say.”

Lexa nuzzled the mating mark on Clarke’s neck. “I am sure you are right.”

The blonde chuckled. “I am always right, now let’s get me dressed so that we can go kick some alpha and Order ass. I am ready to be done with this nasty business. I want to celebrate your victory, and I want to go explore everything that Polis has to offer tomorrow since we have hardly been out of this tower so far. Octavia and Jasper keep telling me about the amazing street food, and I haven’t been able to sample any of it yet.”

“Sha, niron, but it was our victory, not my victory. Don’t you forget that.”

Clarke touched her injured side. “I won’t ever forget.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the chapter. As always, I would love to know what you think. I know we didn't get to see the first moment Lexa finally got to hold Madi, but I am pretty certain we will get a flashback of that in an upcoming chapter.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kudos and comments last chapter. Know that I cherish every one of them.

Chapter 19

No matter how long Lexa had been Commander, she would never get over how fast her people could arrange a celebration. Just at the base of the Tower, in a large courtyard, a sizeable stage had been erected for the day’s upcoming events. The streets were lined with metal bins overflowing with flowers, and colorful banners had been hung from the buildings. The citizens of Polis were out, they were in their best dress, and all were on their best behavior…for now. After the unpleasant business of taking care of the Order and their alpha accomplices was completed, there would be no stopping the feasting and imbibing of copious amounts of alcohol.

She smiled and watched as Clarke walked bug-eyed toward the stage. Her alpha had never seen such a spectacle, such splendor, before. All of Skaikru was bug-eyed at the sight before them. Most of them had seen more of Polis than Clarke had, but still the size and scope of the city was the likes of which they had never imagined possible, not even in their wildest dreams. 

The streets went on for miles, and they were lined with shops, street vendors, and more delights than could meet the eye. The omega had to steer her mate away from a window filled with sweet treats, promising her that she would procure one of each of them for Clarke to try later. 

As they passed a vendor with roasted meats and vegetables, Lexa wasn’t so easily able to direct Clarke in a different direction. Her alpha made her stop and buy her a plate of perfectly charred root vegetables. The omega couldn’t help her laugh when her alpha wolfed down the food and asked Clarke why she hadn’t wanted any of the meat.

Clarke shrugged. “I like meat, of course I do, but I was on my own in the woods for ten looong months, and the only consistent food I had was meat and fish. I never had trouble hunting, so having a source of protein wasn’t the problem. The problem was that I didn’t pay enough attention to Monty when we first landed, and he would point out the edible plants. Let’s just say that there is such a thing as having too much protein. Eating rabbit day in and day out gets old fast when there isn’t something else to go with it.”

Lexa had to give it to her mate, Clarke was carrying herself like a true leader. After licking her fingers clean from her impromptu meal, the blonde stood herself up to her full height, set her shoulders back, and puffed up her chest. She locked her arm with Lexa and finished strolling up to the stage like she had done it a hundred times before. She had on her full armor, her face paint, pauldron and sash, and the bone crown of Azgeda. Her hair was intricately braided, and there was not a single trace of any nerves. 

As soon as the blonde spotted the group of alphas at the front of the crowd, her countenance grew steely, and Lexa could feel the rumble brewing in Clarke’s chest as she gazed upon the men and women who had been sent to try and force the brunette’s submission. Blue tendrils of light started to seep from the alpha, and Lexa knew that whatever the force was that was Wanheda, it had now fully taken residence within her alpha. To their credit, the group of alphas sensed the power of Wanheda, blue light aside, and more than a few ducked their eyes as Clarke passed them.

Be it an innate power her alpha had always had hidden within her, or a spirit that truly did possess her mate, all Lexa knew was that she could feel Clarke’s power growing as the got closer to the stage. There was an electric current surrounding the blonde, and Lexa wouldn’t have been surprised if her alpha were able to call lightning from the heavens if she desired to do so. 

When they got to the steps of the stage, Clarke stood back and gestured for her mate to walk up the steps first. The alpha followed closely behind and took up her spot next to Lexa as the omega sat on her throne. 

Anya came up to flank Heda’s other side, and Gustus and Indra took up their usual spots. Behind Heda and Wanheda stood the nervous group of men and women from the Order. They had not been afforded chairs as was the normal custom, and they had been forced to stand there for at least thirty minutes while waiting for Heda to arrive with her mate. Something was up, they just didn’t know what it was.

Lexa scanned the sea of people until she found her pup. This event was the one time so far that Lexa and Clarke had willingly left their daughter in the care of the blonde’s mother. Abby was far at the back of the crowd on the street, but not so far that the pair could not see her standing with Madi in her arms. The two were heavily guarded. The Hedas didn’t want Madi or Abby nearby for the events that were soon to take place.

Lexa took a deep breath and surveyed her people. It seemed that all of Polis was in attendance to witness the return of Heda Lexa and catch a glimpse of the gorgeous alpha who won her heart. She sat for several minutes in silence until even Clarke started to fidget.

Finally, she rose and walked to the edge of the stage. “Citizens of Polis, it is with great honor that I retake the mantle as your Heda.” She had to wait until the crowd stopped cheering. Her people were beyond happy that their Commander was back in Polis.

“Some of the details of what happened to me might be known to you, but it is more likely that you were fed lies to placate you as the Usurper Ontari tried to take up the helm of the Coalition; one she failed miserably at. You became prisoners in your own home, and were forced to labor for her gain, not your own or for those of the Kongeda (Coalition).” Lexa paced. “The men and women of the Order, the Flamekeepers that you trust, did nothing to help you as you suffered under Ontari kom Azgeda’s rule, and unbeknownst to many of you, I was within arm’s reach if only the Order had allowed you to see what had happened to me.”

Red tendrils of light started to pour off Heda and several members of the Order gasped. “You see, the night before the fall of the Maunon (Mountain men), I mated with Clarke kom Skaikru, a worthy and strong alpha, but the events at the Mountain forced me to walk away from her.” Many in the crowd huffed and booed. “What you don’t know is that I was forced to make a decision. I had to choose between saving my people and walking away from my mate or staying with Clarke but watching all of our people in the Mountain die.” 

Lexa paused in her pacing and looked at the crowd. “I am Heda, and because of that, I chose my people over my mate that day. I am proud of the decision I made that day. I saved our people, but at great cost to myself and to the woman I love, and that is what I thought it was to be your Heda. My love for you must eclipse even that of the love of my mate. No matter what the future holds, you, my people, will always come first.”

Lexa’s hands were clasped tightly behind her back, and Clarke could feel that pain wafting off her, even as her demeanor became more powerful. “I may be proud to serve you, but I am not proud of the pain I caused my mate that day. I had to walk away from the only person I have ever truly loved. I had been taught that to be Commander was to be alone, and those misguided teachings led me to the decision I made instead of thinking of ways that would best serve you, my people, and my mate.”

Lexa turned and looked at Clarke, regret filling her as she spoke even though she knew she had already been forgiven for her actions that day. “I cannot and will not regret saving our people from that Mountain, but I will always regret walking away from my love.”

The omega walked over to Clarke and took her hand, leading her to the front of the stage. She took the alpha’s other hand in hers then got on one knee and bowed her head at the same time as exposing her neck to the alpha. “I swear fealty to you, Klark kom Skaikru, and let it be known that forever, your needs will be my own, and your people’s will be as well. From this day forth, your people will be known as the thirteenth clan.”

A hush came over the crowd. Never had they witnessed a Commander bowing before anyone. Whispers of kwelen (weak) could be heard from the group of alphas at the front, and from the Order members behind her. The people of Skaikru blinked in stunned surprise at the announcement. Clarke lifted Lexa back to her feet and stared into her eyes as a thousand emotions fluttered over her face, and then, astonishing everyone including Heda, Clarke got on her own knees and bared her neck for all to see. The alpha swore her fealty, her devotion, her undying love, and her sword to her Heda, and to her mate. 

The crowd was thunderstruck. Alphas didn’t willingly bow to the omega mates, and Commanders didn’t bow to anyone, yet before them stood a pair who had done just that, and in doing so made themselves equal to one another.

Clarke gave Lexa a lopsided smile and then a bawdy kiss, much to the delight of the crowd. With a huge grin on her face, Clarke addressed the gathering. “Ai laik Wanheda, the Commander of Death, but I would also like to think that I am the Commander of Love, or maybe it is Heda Lexa that is, for you see, the day Lexa walked away from me, she had freed your people from the sharp talons of the Mountain, but instead of being celebrated, your beloved Order thought her weak, even though she had accomplished something no other Commander had ever been able to before. When they found out she was pregnant with my pup, my baby girl, they stripped her of her power and threw her in the dungeons, stating she was weak and mate-less and not worthy to hold the title of Heda.” The people remained silent, hanging on every word Clarke said. They didn’t know any of this, and they didn’t know that Lexa had given birth. That was a secret that had not gotten out yet. “They starved her, and they let her freeze under blankets not worthy of being cut into rags for cleaning. Every day, they would send in a different alpha to try and force her to submit, to show that she was weak, but you know what?” Clarke turned and looked at the Order. “She overcame everything that was thrown at her, and it was all because of love.” 

She walked over and grabbed Titus by the collar of his robes. She dragged the sweating bald man to the front of the stage and forced him to kneel as she casually went on speaking.

“First, she was imprisoned for her love; for her love of me, but also for her love of you. It was also your love of her that got her imprisoned and tortured, but I will explain that in a minute.”

Clarke slammed Titus back down when he tried to stand. “Second, it was her love that helped her escape from her cell, and it was her love that carried her to me. She left her pup behind, praying that Ontari and the Order wouldn’t hurt our daughter, thinking she would die in her efforts all so that I would know of the daughter we had made together, and in hopes that I would somehow be able to rescue our pup.”

Clarke growled. “Ontari, who was brought to Polis by this man, and the Order ripped our pup out of your Heda’s arms and ordered the Flame to be removed from her knowing it would kill her.” She squeezed the back of Titus’ neck, making him whimper. “The only reason they kept her alive in that prison was so that they could get their hands on our pup, who is a Natblida. They cared nothing for you, the people, while they did this or while Ontari used her gona to force your submission to her, and they certainly cared nothing for Lexa who had rightfully won her Conclave to become your beloved Heda.”

The alpha squatted next to Titus. “Do you want to tell them why you were so willing to kill the most successful, and most beloved Heda there has ever been, or should I?”

“Let me up,” Titus demanded.

“I guess I will be telling.” Clarke kept the man on his knees, knowing she couldn’t force his submission through pheromones. “Actually, it’s not my secret to share, but I am sure Heda will share it with you, but there is something I need to do before Lexa fills you in on the tiny little detail the Order has never told you before.”

The alpha gestured to Gustus who came over and kept Titus on his knees. She walked down the steps and stood directly in front of the group of alphas. With voice booming, and the crowd straining to see her, she yelled, “These are the alphas who willingly went down into the dungeons each day to try and force your Heda into submission. Every one of these people had sworn their loyalty to Heda, yet when given the chance, they forsook their vow for a chance to see their Heda on her knees. Sometimes they went down as a pack, but not once did Heda Lexa submit to them, not even after being starved and frozen, and heavily pregnant. They did it because the Order told them to; the Order that is supposed to bow to Heda, not the other way around.”

She paced in front of the increasingly nervous group. “Your Heda stood strong among these men and women who sought to hurt her, who sought to humiliate her while she was already down, but all it did was prove that these men and woman are the real weak ones, and I will prove that to you right now.”

Clarke practically glowed blue in front of Lexa, and the crowd shifted nervously under her building power. When the light pouring off Clarke got so bright to Lexa that she thought her eyes would sear with a permanent image of her mate like this, the light burst forth from her mate, and every alpha in front of her was not only on their knees but also whimpering in pain. 

Clarke casually walked up the steps again and took over keeping Titus on his knees. She waved her hand at the kneeling alphas. “This is what your Order wanted to do to Heda Lexa. They wanted to see her on her knees, they wanted her to submit, and they wanted to see her gone, dead, because she would not bow or break to their rule, and because of all of you. Your love of your Commander was not what they wanted. Her love of you wasn’t either. They wanted a Commander who they could control, but Heda Lexa would not let them because of her love for you and you for her. She is the Commander for the people, not for stodgy, power grubbing men like Titus and his ilk.”

Lexa took her place at Clarke’s side and placed her hand on Titus’ slippery bald head, using him as nothing more than something to lean on. Those behind her protested at this abuse, but she ignored them.

“As you know,” Lexa began, “before me there had never been an omega Commander, and this was for good reason. When one wins the conclave, the Order places the Flame in the back of our necks.” Lexa lifted her hair for all to see the scar. “But what you don’t know is that they use the Flame as a means of control, only it didn’t work on me. It doesn’t seem to work on omegas.”

A line of silent guards started to take their place behind the Order. The members weren’t even aware because they were too focused on Lexa’s words.

“The alphas the Flame is put into make them more aggressive, more willing to force the submission of their people, but it also makes them more docile and pliable in the hands of the Order, and there was only really ever one reason for this.” 

She took her hand off Titus’ head and used his shoulder to wipe it off. “We’ve always thought that the Order was a group of betas, trying to keep our society and our religion together, but everything they have ever done has been a lie to keep their secret safe. The Order only exists to keep their secret safe.”

An older member of the Order charged forward. “This is enough. You are speaking lies to the people and I won’t allow it.”

“I am your Commander,” Lexa spewed, “it is not you who gives the orders here.” In a flash, she whipped out the gun she had been hiding at her side for days. A bright red splash of blood covered her face when she shot the man in the forehead. She calmly holstered the gun at her side as the man dropped to the floor of the stage.

“Does anyone else want to accuse me of lying?”

The silence that followed was deafening. The Order members behind her now quaked in fear, and the crowd before her stared with huge eyes. Lexa wanted her audience captivated, and she got what she wanted. The use of the gun instead of her sword or dagger was something she hadn’t planned, but she wanted to show the Order, and her people, that things were changing, and while after this, she wouldn’t condone the use of firearms in her city, she would not deny their limited usefulness either. 

No one in the crowd moved except for the alphas in the front who were still uncomfortably on their knees. Clarke’s hold over them was absolute.

“These people, for generations, have pretended to be something that they are not. They have formed the Order, they invented the Conclave where Nightbloods would fight to the death, all in an attempt to gain power.”

Lexa spun and stalked toward the members. Her red light was shining bright. “These people pretend to be just like you and me, but they are not. They are not people who have dedicated their life to the Flame, they invented the Flame to control the Commanders and thus control you. They needed to in order to hide their secret.”

“What is it?” someone in the crowd yelled. 

“Yeah, tell us what the secret is,” yelled another.

Behind her those in the Order started to shift uneasily. Several turned to try and leave the stage, but the line of guards kept them from moving. They were about to be outed, and they had nowhere to go.

A woman named Faible fell to her knees before Lexa. “Beja Heda, please don’t do this. They will kill all of us. We were just trying to survive.”

“And why shouldn’t they? You have been killing us for generations, except you hid your responsibility for those deaths by calling for the Conclaves. You have deprived mothers and fathers of the sons and daughters all for the sake of hiding who you are; to control us and make yourselves prosperous. It is disgusting and it will go on no more.”

“Citizens of the Coalition,” Lexa shouted. “The entire reason the Order was conceived was to hide who they really are. They aren’t like you and me, not at all. There are no alphas, omegas, or betas within their ranks.”

“What do you mean?” Lexa heard.

“That can’t be possible,” said another.

“They let us believe they were a group of betas, but they are not. They are nothing. They have no designations. They have lied to us, and they have manipulated us for years.” 

The members of the Order were trying to scramble off the stage, but Lexa’s gona kept them in place. The crowd on the street was shifting and angry, and the poor alphas in the front were still being forced to submit by a rather calm Wanheda.

“These men and woman have spilled the blood of your children for years just so that they could keep their power and their secret, children who were stripped from their families, those families who were killed for hiding the pups who they loved.” 

Lexa could hardly be seen she was glowing so brightly. “They ripped me from my father’s arms just so they could play make believe, and the thing is, they never wanted an omega Commander. They thought omegas weak, so why steal us away from our families if all they wanted was alphas anyway?

It was so that they could keep up their charade. They stole and sacrificed our Nightblood for a lie.”

“Wanheda can make them submit,” a wizened old man screeched from below.

Lexa shook her head. “Watch as she tries, nothing will happen because these people are not like you or me.”

Clarke turned her attention toward the frightened men and woman. “Let’s do it together,” Clarke suggested and grabbed Lexa’s hand, causing their separate-colored lights to become one and send out a blinding flash. The Order braced themselves, but nothing happened. They remained on their feet.

Growls of “They lied to us,” and “They deserve to die” started to come from the people on the streets. Lexa was so very tempted to step off the stage and let them destroy the people who had lied to them for so many years, but she couldn’t. She thought of her alpha, and what it had done to Clarke to kill all the people in the Mountain. Her sweet and loving alpha hadn’t wanted to, but she had committed genocide. She had erased an entire population of people with the pull of a lever. Lexa couldn’t let that happen again with the deaths of the fifty some odd members of the Order. No, she couldn’t let them be killed no matter what her desire might be.

“Like you, I desire to destroy these people. It is taking everything in me not to let you come up here and rip them to pieces, but I can’t do that.

The people booed.

She held up a hand to command silence. “Listen, if I let you kill them, if I kill them, it will be an act of genocide. These are the last of their kind.”

“So, what! Let them die. They aren’t like us.”

“No, they are not, but they are still people; people who will be punished,” Lexa assured.

Lexa had fully intended to let the crowd have their way with the Order, but she had suddenly realized that she could not let this race of men die. She would punish them severely, however.

“I have an idea, and I think it is one you will appreciate,” she said calmly. “What I propose is that we move them to the Mountain. There, they will have everything they need to survive, but we will lock them inside with no way to ever see the light of day again. Never will they feel the sun on their faces, nor the dirt beneath their feet, not ever again. They will rot below ground for the rest of their lives, and if they chose to have children, then they condemn their sons and daughters to their same fate. Our people are of the Earth, but we will take that from them and make them live the life of our most hated enemy in the sterile confines of Mount Weather.”

“Please don’t do that to us,” Faible begged. “It’s a fate worse than death.”

“You would rather I let the crowd tear you apart? Be my guest. Walk down those steps if you wish to die this day.”

Faible shrunk back toward her people. Lexa could hear Faible pleading with her people to bow to Heda, and in their fear they did. Each one got on their knees and exposed their necks, but it was all too little, too late. Heda sneered at their pathetic effort.

“Does anyone object to this?” Lexa queried.

“I do.” It was Charles Pike who stepped forward.

Lexa growled. Here we go, she thought.

“Well, it’s not so much an objection as a question,” he said.

“Speak your piece, Charles Pike.”

“I know I don’t know much about what happened with the Mountain, but isn’t it filled with technology, and aren’t there weapons inside? What if they learn how to use that against us?”

“Can’t be done,” Raven pushed her way to the front of the crowd. “I already Raven-proofed the weapons. If they dare to touch what is left of them, the entire mountain will go boom.” She gave a wicked smile. “And, we already took everything of value from inside. There’s enough left that the Order can produce some basic food, have electricity and fresh water, but that’s it. There will be no new clothing, no new shoes, and no real luxuries, not like what they are used to now. Sending the Order to the Mountain will be like sending them back to the times of the Cave Man.”

“And what of the alphas that tried to make you submit?” someone asked. “You deserve justice Heda.”

“You are not wrong,” Clarke finally spoke up. Her voice wobbled almost imperceptibly, and Lexa wasn’t sure if it was because holding the guilty alphas on their knees was becoming taxing, or because the omega had made the sudden decision not to commit another genocide. She would have to wait until later to find that out. “The alphas before you will be punished, but your Heda has left it up to you what will be done with them. Do what you will.”

After that, it was a bloodbath. The crowd surged on the kneeling alphas, and Clarke finally let up on her hold over them, giving them at least a fighting chance of survival. If any did survive, they would be imprisoned, but there was little doubt what the outcome would be that day. The people wanted revenge for their beloved Heda. The citizens had been wronged by the Order, but none so much as Heda, and they wanted to give her justice.

Instead of watching the massacre on the streets, Lexa turned and ordered her men to take the Order away. All except Titus.

“Beja Heda, nou dula dison (Please Heda, don’t do this),” Titus pleaded.

Lexa called to Tristan. “Take him and put him in the same cell I was held captive in, and only give him that same damn mangy blanket I was given to stay warm. Let’s give him some time to think about what he has done. He will not be afforded the same luxuries,” Lexa sneered sarcastically, “as the rest of his people who get sent to the Mountain. He will spend his time rotting in that cell until I decide to put him on a tree. Until then, get him out of my sight.”

Heda turned and looked at the bodies, and the blood running in the street. She had no regret over what had just taken place. “Jus drein jus daun (blood must have blood),” she whispered. The dead alphas may not have drawn her blood, no, they had done worse by trying to force her to submit after she had already been taken captive and while heavily pregnant. In her eyes, the disloyal and self-serving alphas had received a fitting punishment.

She turned her back on the scene and found concerned blue eyes starting at her. She was satisfied with how things went, but she wasn’t exactly happy about it. She forced a small smile for her mate. She barked some orders at her men to clean up the street and yelled for the festivities to start once the mess was cleaned up. 

Looking at her people, they appeared confident at the actions Lexa had taken. She had worried that the citizens would not look kindly upon allowing the Order to live, but the people knew it was a fate worse than death to be locked in the Mountain with no way to escape. The members of the Order would only just scratch by with what was left of the place, and it was likely that in a matter of just a few years, they would die out on their own. At least that way, she wouldn’t be directly responsible for the massacre of an entire population. The Order would have everything they needed to barely survive. That is all she was obligated to provide for them.

Now, all she wanted was to get Madi into her arms, eat and drink her fill, and retire to the Tower and snuggle with her alpha; that is if her alpha wasn’t angry at her for not killing the Order.

Hours later, she was sitting on the couch as a lightly tipsy Clarke played with their pup on the floor. The alpha was on her back and holding Madi on her stomach trying to get the pup to sit unsupported.

“She’s still too young to do that, hodnes.” 

“I know, but every time she falls over and I catch her, she smiles.” Clarke gave her a pearly grin. She had changed out of her clothes and wore only a tank top and loose shorts. “You know, I admire what you did today…letting the Order live.”

Clarke sat up and offered up Madi to Lexa, who took her immediately and held her close to her chest. “I know what it is to end an entire population of people, and no matter how deserving, it doesn’t feel good. When I ran away from Arkadia…after Mount Weather…so much of it had to do with knowing I had just committed genocide. Even knowing their people would have done the same to us given the same chance, I regretted…I still regret having to pull that lever. So, I appreciate what you did today. It would have been so much easier to kill those people, but you didn’t, and you found a way to punish them that was just as fitting for what they have done to your people for so long. I don’t know if I could have done that.”

Clarke got off the floor and sat on the couch, pulling Lexa and her pup to her. “It is why you are Heda. You make the decisions no one else can, and you see things differently than the rest of us.”

Lexa blinked at her mate. “I did it for you, Klark,” Lexa whispered. She cleared her throat. “I know what it cost you to kill those people in the Mountain, and I wanted to spare you the pain of having it happen again. I didn’t do it for me, for my people, or for the Order. I did it for you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that was a satisfying end to the Order. Personally, I think I might choose death over being stuck in that infernal place with no sun, trees, birds, and rain. One of the reasons I would never travel to space is because there are no trees. I need nature. To be deprived of that would be hell. 
> 
> I think my favorite part of this entire chapter, and maybe this entire story, is Clarke lying on her back and making Madi smile as she plays with her. It just makes me all warm and fuzzy inside, and since it is so cold outside, that's exactly what I need.
> 
> Let me know your thoughts.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

Clarke and Lexa left the Tower hand in hand. Madi was strapped in a contraption concocted by Abby that allowed Lexa to carry her pup in front of her and have her hands free.

It had been eight days since the celebration of Heda’s return, and now it was time to crown, or de-crown, the new queen of Azgeda.

Clarke looked fetching in her Wanheda armor and warpaint. Her hair only held a few loose braids, and the bone crown of Azgeda sat atop it. The alpha was considering cutting her hair short because it had become Madi’s favorite toy. Any time the tiny pup was in her arms, Madi somehow found a way to latch onto a handful of her hair. By some means her omega was a master at avoiding the same stinging fate. It was more likely that it was because Lexa had taken to putting her hair up in a tight bun so that Madi couldn’t get her hands on it. Clarke would have done the same thing, but Lexa confessed that she adored Clarke with her hair down and long, so no matter the pain of tiny hands pulling at her hair, or her desire to cut it short, Clarke would keep her long tresses, although there were days where she wondered what it would be like to have short, short hair.

“What are you thinking about, niron?” Lexa asked.

Clarke rubbed a sore spot on her head. “I am thinking about what it would be like to have nice, short hair. It would keep me safe from grabbing hands, and I wouldn’t be so hot all the time.”

Lexa nudged her shoulder. “You wouldn’t dare cut it.” The omega sneaked lazy fingers through the blonde tresses. “Besides, you would regret that decision come winter when the back of your neck was cold all the time.”

The alpha chuckled. “No, I probably wouldn’t dare. I wouldn’t want the wrath of Heda to come down on me, or the pouty frown that would adorn the face of the cutest little omega to ever live.” Clarke reached out to stroke her pup’s cheek.

They continued to walk. They had an hour or two to kill before Costia would become Azplana, and they wanted to enjoy the beautiful day.

They met an anxious looking Anya on the street. “Heda, Wanheda, beja. You need to help me.”

“Oh no. What is your mate up to now?” Clarke grumbled. Since getting to Polis, Raven had become like a kid in a candy store. She actually had raided the candy story…along with Clarke and the other delinquents…twice. There were too many delights, and too many discarded objects from before the bombs, for the omega to ignore. Since their arrival, Raven had been given the official title of Polis mechanic, and she wore the new name with honor.

“She’s been smoking again, and in her dazed state built her tushy bombs, and she took a few of them down to ‘demonstrate’ to Titus.”

“Tushy bomb?” Clarke laughed. “Is that what she’s calling it now?”

It was entirely Indra’s fault that Raven had discovered sheiv (hash/pot). The wormana enjoyed the subtle relaxing high it gave her when she smoked it, and she often partook of the herbed wonder after a long day. Unfortunately for Anya, it had the opposite effect on her mate. Raven had tried the stuff with Indra one night, and instead of relaxing her, it keyed the omega up. She’d gone on for hours, plotting how to make her mini bomb, and the next day she found what she needed to do just that. She had been threatening to show it off to the dour bald man ever since, and she had finally convinced a few of the guards to let her into the dungeons.

After the destruction left behind by Raven’s rocket launchers, the guards were eager to see what else the strik tinka (small mechanic) could do, and having not been explicitly forbidden from letting the omega in to see Titus, they decided to let her in. 

Lexa laughed. Anya had an almost manic omega on her hands, and she knew she was going to have to somehow stem the other omega’s excitement over everything she found in Polis. She’d had multiple thoughts on how to do that, and she had decided that she would task Raven with figuring out a way to make the lift in the Tower electric. She knew for a fact that Raven had already started repairing a number of solar panels she had found, so she thought energizing the lift would be a good use of the tinkerer’s time. She would, however, have to tell Raven she would only get the job if she curtailed her use of the sheiv.

In the meantime, she was extremely interested in seeing Raven’s tushy bomb demonstration. She also wouldn’t mind seeing the fear on Titus’s face when he saw it.

So, Clarke and Lexa veered from their path and entered the dungeon. Lexa reswaddled Madi against the chill of the damp place, and when they got to the former Fleimkepa’s cell, she was unsurprised that Raven had anticipated their arrival. The omega immediately handed Heda a tiny pair of ear protectors for Madi. The tiny omega, for her part, seemed to enjoy the small pair of ear protectors. Lexa was sure she would mouth them the second Madi could take them off her head. Everything went in her mouth these days.

“Anya ratted me out, huh?” Raven smirked, and her mate, who stood behind Lexa, huffed.

“She did. I have to say, I am intrigued to see how your little bomb works.” Anya huffed again.

Clarke was no less fascinated, but she was even more interested in the man cowering behind thick metal bars under a measly, thin blanket. It had only been eight days, but already the man was a shadow of his former self, and she was glad of it. Lexa, who’d survived ten months confined in the cell had suffered the same way only for much, much longer. He was finally getting a taste of his own medicine except that no one was coming down to try and make him submit. In that way, his imprisonment was not as taxing as Heda’s. 

Lexa had decided. He would rot in the cell for the same length of time she had, and after that time, he would receive Wamplei kom Thauz Kodon (death by a thousand cuts) though she doubted the man would even make it to one hundred.

“So, as I was saying, Titey Titus, this little thing is my tushy bomb.” Raven held up a small device that was only about the size of her pinky finger. 

She had a watermelon sitting on a stool and used a screwdriver to ream a hole out of one end of it. She then inserted her ingenious device. 

She had a remote in her hand and advised everyone to step back a good ten feet. 

“Here goes nothing.” She hit the button on the remote, and the watermelon exploded sending pink sticky liquid everywhere, but mostly onto Titus.

“Fuck yeah, baldy.” She pointed and laughed. “You might want to eat that chunk that landed on your head. It’s the last watermelon you will ever taste.” She wiped some destroyed fruit off herself. “Oh, and just so you know, I will be begging Heda to let me use this on you one day. You deserve it after everything you did to her. I would love to make your butt go boom, you sick, fucking, designation-less asshole.”

“I may be compelled to comply to your request if your argument is convincing enough,” Lexa chuckled. Her attitude was light, but Clarke could feel the sadness coming off her. Titus had been somewhat of a father-figure to her, no matter what had happened, his betrayal of her, especially when he was the one who called Ontari to the city, still stung.

“How about we get Madi out of here and finish our stroll before I get this awful crown off my head? As much as I am eager for the ceremony announcing Costia as queen, I still would like to enjoy the little bit of time we have before that starts,” Clarke confided.

“As you wish, Wanheda,” Lexa said, and led the way back out of the dungeon. 

Once on the street, Anya darted off when she spotted someone she knew. Raven laughed when she spied a small chunk of watermelon in her mate’s hair. Lexa, on the other hand, narrowed her eyes at the figure in the distance. She couldn’t tell who it was or whether she knew the person, but a niggling sensation at the back of her neck had her striding toward the figure that Anya was hurriedly talking to.

When she got to where Anya and the man were speaking, her seda (teacher) had a decidedly guilty expression on her face.

“Lex, ah Heda,” Anya stammered.

Lexa ignored her fos (first) as she studied the shrouded figure. It was a hot day outside, yet this man was standing there in a dark, hooded leather duster. She tilted her head, but she couldn’t make out the man’s face. Not with all the material covering it.

“Take down your hood,” Lexa commanded.

“Ah, Heda,” Anya tried to intervene. “I want to properly introduce you to this man, but I think it would be best if we wait until after Costia is crowned queen. You two are going to need some time to get acquainted.”

Lexa disregarded Anya. “Take down your hood,” she repeated.

Anya went to protest, but a weathered and scarred hand stopped her. “It’s okay, lukot (friend),” said a gravely but vaguely familiar voice.

Trembling hands moved and tipped the hood backward to reveal a man who looked more Skaikru than Trikru, but the clothes he wore screamed of someone from Lexa’s clan. The duster was old and well-worn, but the omega could see the telltale signs of Trikru craftmanship. The jerkin he wore underneath the duster, his pants, and his sturdy boots did as well.

It was his close-cropped hair and clean-shaven face that threw her. She narrowed her eyes as she analyzed the man standing before her and was certain that she had never seen him in Arkadia or with any other members of Skaikru before. With eyes raking over his body, she used her nose to try and scent him, but with her pup lying quietly on her chest, Madi was all she could smell.

It wasn’t until her eyes really focused on his that realization hit her like a ton of bricks. A pain like she had never known before ripped through her. Her stomach clenched, and her knees wanted to buckle, but she didn’t let that happen. Instead, she did what she had always done best: she tamped down her overflowing emotions until all that remained was the stony mask of Heda.

Without a word to the man, Lexa calmly unstrapped Madi from her chest and handed the pup off to her confused mate who was standing just behind her.

“I…I need to speak to Costia before the crowning ceremony starts.” She gave Clarke a quick kiss on the cheek, and then gave one to Madi. “I will see all of you later,” making it clear that the man was to be in attendance after the ceremony was over. With that she turned tail and stomped away.

Gustus, who was never far from his Heda shook his head at the man and Anya then trotted off after his Commander. 

Instead of strapping Madi to her, Clarke chose to keep her daughter in her arms. “Want to tell me why my heart just almost stopped because of the pain you two just caused my mate?”

Anya was uncharacteristically nervous and looked almost like she thought Wanheda was going to kick her ass from one side of Polis and back again if she spilled the beans. 

Now that Lexa was no longer present, the man seemed to have regained his confidence. “Clarke kom Skaikru, Wanheda, I am Svart kom Trikru.” He held out his arm to Clarke, but she just grumbled at him.

The blonde started to growl, and instead of concentrating on Svart, Clarke turned her anger for her mate on Anya. “Let me guess,” the blonde said slowly, “you’ve been in contact with Lexa’s father since the day you took Lex from his arms and brought her here to Polis.”

“Sha, Wanheda.” Anya kept her eyes on the ground.

“And are you going to explain why you kept this information from her all this time?” Clarke was pissed. For almost twenty years, Lexa had thought her father dead, but he’d been alive, and likely in touch with Anya the entire time. What was probably even more painful for her mate was that this was now the second time Lexa had been made to believe someone was dead when they were not. “You know what, save it. It’s not me you need to tell, but rest assured, you will tell, and know this, if Lexa doesn’t forgive you for this, neither will I.”

Anya dipped her head in understanding, but Svart grabbed Clarke’s wrist before she could trudge off. “Beja, do not blame Anya for any of this. She is the most noble and loyal person I have ever met, and she has dedicated her entire life to your mate, but she has also dedicated it to me.”

“Explain,” Clarke snapped, and Madi shifted at the changing scent of her sire, and the alpha immediately toned her angry pheromones down.

“The day Anya came with the others to take my little Lexa away from me, she should have killed me for hiding Lexa’s Nightblood for so long, but she didn’t. She let me live. She also didn’t have to swear herself to Lexa, but she did. Before that, Anya kom Trikru made a promise to me, one that I didn’t ask for. She promised that no matter where I had to run, where I had to hide, she would help me. She promised to give me as many details about Lexa’s life as she could.” Svart shuffled on his feet. “All these years, I have been forced to watch my daughter from afar. There were periods where I couldn’t get near her or Polis, no matter how good I got at hiding, so Anya took it upon herself to fill me in on all the amazing and wonderful things my daughter was doing.”

Clarke interrupted him. “Why didn’t you come to her after she became Commander?” She asked with a snarl in her voice. She couldn’t understand why he would have chosen to remain hidden after Lexa became the most powerful person in the clans.

“You know the reason.” This came from Anya. “As much as Lexa wanted to change the laws about Nightbloods and their families, she couldn’t. She was blocked by the Order every time. Changing something that has been in place for so long is not an easy thing either. The people expect Nightbloods to be given up to the Order as soon as their blood is discovered. They all know and accept the penalties for hiding a pup with the Presh Jus. If Svart had shown back up and been recognized, Lexa would have been forced to sentence him to death. Is that something you would have wanted for her?”

Clarke shook her head, heart thudding. Anya was correct, and the thought of Lexa having to put her own father to death made her shiver, knowing it was something that Lexa would never have recovered from. She would have become a shell of herself. 

Clarke sighed. She hadn’t been on Earth for long, but she thought she had a pretty good understanding of the grounders at this point, at least most of them. They were an honorable people, and they trusted and believed in the laws set before them…minus Azgeda. If she had thought it through, she would have realized that Svart had no choice except to remain hidden, and she knew why he was here now. The Order was gone. She’d simply been reacting on instinct when she threatened to not forgive Anya if Lexa couldn’t because if something caused Lexa pain, it was her job to try and make things better, even if that meant withholding forgiveness from the person who was probably her best friend. 

As it was, everything was screaming in her to go and comfort her mate, but she refrained for just another minute. “I’ll go talk to her,” and not being able to help herself, because Lexa was her mate after all, and she would defend her no matter what, “but you two had better find a way to make things right with her as quickly as possible because I know that I am in for a night of tears and sleeplessness. No matter what you say, she’s going to blame herself for your having been gone for so long. She’s going to think it is her fault, or that she should have somehow known you were alive.” She pointed at Anya. “And you, you better brush up on your sword skills because come morning, I think you are going to find yourself getting the crap beat out of you in a training ring, and I can’t say that you won’t deserve it for hiding this from her for so long.”

Clarke turned and shifted Madi in her arms. “Come on sweatheart, let’s go find your nomon. I think you are just the medicine she could use right now.”

When Clarke finally caught up to Lexa, it wasn’t her mate she found. It was Heda, the one Clarke hadn’t seen since before the battle at Mount Weather. This Heda hadn’t come out even during the battle to retake Polis. Her face was smooth and free of emotion, but deep down, the alpha knew her mate was hurting from the knowledge that her father had kept himself hidden from her all this time.

The omega was standing near the stage where the “alpha massacre” happened eight days ago, and she was speaking with Costia. When Clarke approached, Costia and Echo gave her a concerned look. This wasn’t the Lexa they were used to speaking with. They knew something was up, they just didn’t know what.

“Hey you two, I know the ceremony starts in just a few minutes, but I need to speak to Heda for a minute.” She handed Madi to Costia without a word, but not before giving her a quick kiss. “We will be right back. Keep her safe.”

Lexa tensed, and before she could protest, Clarke dragged her to a gap behind the stage where they could speak in private, but instead of saying anything, the alpha shifted and pulled Lexa into a crushing hug and sealed her lips on the mating mark on the omega’s neck.

It took a minute, but finally Lexa’s rigid body relaxed. “Why does this keep happening to me?” She mumbled into Clarke’s neck. The alpha could tell that Lexa wanted to scream and yell and cry, but she didn’t. She couldn’t, not with the ceremony starting in just a few minutes. “Costia, and now my father. Klark, he’s been alive all this time, and he hid from me. Anya hid it from me.”

“I won’t defend or make excuses for them, just like I didn’t Costia, but you need to hear them out, no matter how painful. Just know that both of them love you so much, Lex. What they did seems unforgivable, but what they did, they did for you.”

Lexa wiggled out of Clarke’s embrace. The alpha could see her struggling to rein in her emotions. “Really? Hiding from me for twenty years was doing it for me?” The omega lashed out and punched the wooden stage post next to her. To her credit, she didn’t flinch in pain when the skin on one of her knuckles split.

Clarke grabbed Lexa’s hand before she could hit the post again. “Hey, don’t do that.” Clarke kissed the damaged hand. “Save it for the morning and take it out on Anya in the fighting rings. Today, listen to what they have to say, and if you don’t like what you hear, I will happily drag them to the highest mountain in Azgeda and leave them there naked to freeze to death, or better yet, you can insert a butt bomb into each of them and blow them to smithereens.”

Lexa gave a weak chuckle. “We need to come up with a better name than butt or tushy bomb. I’ve decided I really cannot stand it.” Her next chuckle was a little stronger. “Maybe Titus won’t be the first one to experience Raven’s evil genius.”

“Maybe not, but will you at least listen to them before you pass judgment. I mean, if nothing else, you should be happy that Anya and her men spared your father’s life that day.”

Lexa exhaled sharply through her nose. “I suppose,” she admitted unwillingly.

“Then let’s go make Costia the queen she deserves to be, and after that you can paint the tower with Anya and Svart’s blood if you want. I’ll even help,” Clarke winked.

“Mochof, Klark…for everything you do.” Lexa leaned in for a kiss.

“Whatever it is I do, I do it for you and Madi.” With that, Clarke grabbed Lexa’s hand and led her back to where everyone was waiting. 

The stage was set up differently from just over a week ago. Then there had only been Lexa’s throne. Now banners and steamers in the Azgeda colors of silvery white and ice blue billowed in the air, and Costia stood in the ceremonial dress of Azgeda royalty. Next to her stood her brother Roan. On her other side was Echo looking as proud as a peacock for her soon to be mate. 

Lexa introduced Costia to the crowd and denounced the actions of the former Azplana. She informed them of Nia’s atrocities and then let Costia take the stage to speak for, and to, her people. The raven-haired alpha assured them that now was going to be a time of prosperity. No longer would the people of Azgeda live in fear of never-ending winters with not enough food for their pups. No longer would the people be imprisoned at the whim of a vengeful queen, and no longer would the people of the surrounding clans need to fear attacks and raids from the Ice Nation. Costia was ready to fully embrace what it meant to be a clan in the Coalition, and she expected to see the benefits from it immediately.

When the time came for Clarke to hand over the crown, Costia surprised her by getting on one knee and submitting to her. Costia swore her fealty to Heda and Wanheda and promised to uphold the core values Lexa had been instilling into her people for years. 

When Clarke lifted the crown from her head, instead of allowing it to be placed on her own head, Costia instead took it in her hands. She held it up for all to see.

“No longer will this be the symbol of Azgeda power,” Costia bellowed. “For too long those who wore this crown wore it to instill fear into the heart of our proud nation, but no longer.” She dropped the crown and smashed it to pieces with her foot to the surprise of the gathered crowd, but not to the surprise of anyone on the stage. “That crown was worn by those who thought themselves better than the people they were meant to represent, but no longer. There will be no crowns, and there will be no symbols meant to portray me as a ruler. I will be your leader, but every citizen of Azgeda will have a say in how things go from here on out. I am here to represent the people, not the other way around. I will be a leader, but I will also be a servant to the Ice Nation so that it can rise up to its full potential, and once again be the nation that the other clans will look upon as a friend and not an enemy.”

For the second time in just over a week, there was a reason to celebrate in Polis, but Lexa wasn’t feeling it. She sat in her chair when the feast began and pushed the food around on her plate. As was custom, Clarke was at one side, and Anya on the other. Lexa hadn’t said a word to fos yet, and Anya shivered at the icy reception she was getting. 

Anya did not do better with her plate, so Raven, who had no qualms about eating her mate’s abandoned food took the plate from her. Her rich chocolate eyes did survey her alpha several times throughout the meal. She didn’t know what was going on between her mate and Heda, but she could feel the ire coming off Lexa that was directed at her warrior woman. 

Normally she would have been more than happy to butt into the situation, but something about Lexa’s cold stares and Anya’s guilty countenance had her keeping her mouth shut for a change. She looked at Clarke who looked neither guilty nor angry. The blonde, who was eating at a slow pace and giving her mate concerned looks, was exuding soothing pheromones and they had even Raven relaxed. The omega just wished that whatever Clarke was doing would work on her mate and Heda. Those two were coiled as tightly as the springs she had been developing to help with the elevator project. 

She looked across the crowd at the man Lexa was staring holes into. She had never seen the man before, but she thought him handsome and somehow familiar. He didn’t look like the typical grounder because his hair was close-cropped to his head, and he was clean shaven, but the rest of him screamed of Trikru. He was staring at Heda just as intently as she was at him. The looks he was giving her were ones full of regret and sadness, but also intense pride and love. Raven couldn’t make sense of it.

Finally, Lexa shoved her chair back and stood. She gave Anya a look that had her General standing and following her off the stage. Clarke looked like she wasn’t sure what to do, but she too stood and followed her mate off the stage as Lexa moved toward the man sitting with the crowd. Before she left, Clarke, who had been holding Madi the whole time, deposited the pup in mother’s lap. “Keep her for a while?” Raven heard Clarke whisper.

Raven wanted to follow too, but a hand on her shoulder stopped her.

“I am not sure what’s going on,” Echo, who was sitting next to her said, “but I think it’s wise if you leave them to it. Something has Heda upset, and it’s probably best that you don’t get too close to whatever fire is going to start burning.”

The omega watched as the trio walked toward the man. He stood as the others approached. He followed as Lexa led everyone away from the crowd and into the Tower. Raven hoped that whatever was bothering Heda was not so terrible that someone ended up being pushed from the balcony again. She had seen Ontari fall, and it was not a sight she ever wanted to see again. She shivered just thinking about it.

Echo seemed to have the same thought. She quivered in her seat.

“I am sure that whatever is going on that everything will be okay,” Costia said, reaching past Echo to take Raven’s hand. “Heda is the strongest person I know, both physically and mentally. Whatever is happening, she’s not going to lose control and kill your mate. Whoever that man is might be another story.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. A lot happened in this chapter. So, Lexa's father is alive. I think a lot of you suspected he would be. I had thought about not introducing him, but I really wanted to give Lexa one of her parents. BTW, Svart means black in Swedish. At least, that's what my computer tells me. I thought it a fitting name for a father who was the parent of a Nightblood. In the last chapter, the character Failble - her name means weak in French. I decided to name her that to sort of symbolize the weakness of the Order. They had so much power, and they could have used it for good, but instead used it to serve themselves, and to me that is the ultimate weakness.
> 
> Anyhow, let me know your thoughts. Also, should Clarke cut her hair? I toyed with the idea of her her doing it, but thought I would leave it up to all of you.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter. It's a day early. I'm not going to have any time to post tomorrow, so instead of being late, I decided to be early. 
> 
> I want to thank all of you for all the kudos and comments. I know stories with alpha Clarke is not everyone's cup of tea, so that this story has been so well received has warmed my heart. I just love you all.

Chapter 21

Lexa’s only thought as she walked into the Tower was not to lose control of her tightly held emotions and burst into tears.

She was so angry and so hurt by the fact that her father and Anya had been hiding the man’s existence from her that she had barely been able to pay attention to Costia’s rise to the helm of Azgeda.

When Lexa stomped into the Tower requiring Anya and Svart to follow at a quick clip, her pain was all she could think of, and it had her steering clear of the elevator. Her first thought was to retreat to the Throne room, but she didn’t want to take what she knew would be a long and awkward ride up in the elevator car with Anya and her father. She was also afraid that she might lose control and kill one or both of them before they reached their destination, so instead of heading up, Lexa stomped to the lower-level library. 

She heard Clarke gasp as they entered the softly lit room. Her alpha hadn’t had a chance to explore this part of the tower yet, and she was eyeing up the rows upon rows of books that lined thick wooden shelves. Upon the numerous tables in the room were all journals and books the Order had been hiding for generations. 

The archives had only just been found, and Lexa hadn’t had time to start delving into the manuscripts yet. She gave Clarke a faint smile as the alpha, clearly enthralled, scanned the room with her eyes. Her mate had not yet seen this or any of the libraries. The omega could almost feel Clarke’s desire to scour the title of each book, but her alpha restraint had her holding back. There were more pressing matters to attend to first. 

Lexa walked over the only table not covered in books. “Sit,” she demanded of Anya and Svart.

Anya immediately complied, but Svart hesitated. “Lexa, ai nomfri, beja…”

“Don’t call me that. I haven’t been your nomfri (daughter) for a very long time. I am your Heda.” Lexa was angry, but she also knew she was being unfair. If not for Anya, her father would be dead, and she knew the man had to stay hidden away lest he be caught and brought before her and the Order. She just couldn’t reconcile that with the fact that over all this time, he had never tried to reach out to her, and that Anya had never told her that he was still alive. Logically, she knew why they had kept their secrets, but right then she couldn’t give a rat’s ass about logic.

Lexa wanted to scream, but the sudden touch of her alpha’s body at her back calmed her enough to keep control. She could tell her alpha wanted to intervene, to somehow help everyone through what was going to be a tough discussion, but Clarke held back. It wasn’t her place to interfere with something that had been going on since long before she even knew a life on Earth was possible, so instead of speaking, the blonde lent Lexa her silent support.

Clarke glared at Svart and gave him a look indicating he should sit. She then pulled out a chair for Lexa at the head of the table. Instead of taking a chair herself, she remained standing behind her mate, and stayed quiet as Lexa, Svart, and Anya hashed out what had happened the last twenty years. 

It took over an hour, and everyone was in tears by the end, even Anya. It was clear that Anya had paid a high price to keep the secret of Svart’s existence for so long. Lexa’s fos openly wept and apologized repeatedly to her Heda and friend. She nearly had a complete breakdown as the stress of twenty years of secrets came flooding out, and Lexa realized right then that Anya really was the most noble and best friend a person could have.

Svart had been crying since he started telling Lexa about his life on the run, and Lexa had started crying shortly after that. His life had not been an easy one, but it was one that had him always trying to be near his child, even if he did have to remain out of sight. What was truly astonishing was the lengths Anya went to keep the man fed and healthy when times were lean. Without fail, she always had stories for him about Lexa as she grew from a young pup into the beautiful Commander that she was now, and she regaled him with the details of each one of Lexa’s accomplishments. Even though they had been apart, Svart felt like he had been a part of Lexa’s life since the day she was taken away from him, and that was all thanks to Anya. His biggest regret was that he was not able to come to his daughter sooner than now, and it had him begging for Lexa’s forgiveness at her feet.

The only one with dry eyes in the room was Clarke, and that was only because she was trying to hold it together for her mate. Lexa didn’t need her tears right now. What she needed from Clarke was her love and unyielding support, so her eyes remained dry even as she was dying inside over the pain these three had suffered, although none so much as her mate.

When emotions started to calm, Clarke moved quietly to the doorway and sent someone to fetch her daughter, mother, and Raven. She thought it was time for Svart to meet the rest of his family, especially his granddaughter, and while Raven might not have been family, after all this time, Clarke got the sense that Anya felt like a daughter to Svart, so that meant it seemed only fitting that he was officially introduced to the alpha’s mate. The blonde also called for food to be delivered to the library since neither Anya nor Lexa had eaten anything at the celebration. She doubted that Svart had been able to eat much either. 

By the time the others had arrived, Lexa’s eyes were red and puffy, but there were no more tears. What was there was the overwhelming desire to hold her mate and her pup, and since Clarke had returned to her side, Lexa hadn’t stopped touching her. It was a simple hand on her shoulder as the blonde stood behind her, but that small touch was keeping her grounded. As soon as Abby arrived with Madi, the omega held out her arms for her daughter, and Abby immediately handed her off.

Svart watched all this curiously. He eyed Madi, then Lexa, then Madi again, and finally Clarke. He had made the connection that Madi was their daughter when Lexa had first stalked up him before the new Azplana was crowned. He had just been too overwhelmed at the time to focus on the pup. All his effort had gone into taking in the sight of his beautiful and strong daughter. It had been two decades since he had been so close to her.

“Careful, Heda. Your little one has started doing her poopoo wiggle and grunt. I give you ten minutes before a dirty diaper has to be changed.”

Lexa laughed for the first time that night, and Clarke promised that when the time came, she would be the one to clean up and change their daughter. 

When a server arrived with a tray filled with food and libations, the air in the library finally lifted to one of celebration, the celebration of a family at last reunited. Clarke made plates for her mate, Anya, and Svart, and she finally took a seat at the table when her mate noticed that her knee was starting to bug her. Clarke might be a Natblida now, but no amount of Nightblood would fix the torn ligament in her knee, and it was clear to Lexa that although her mate was hiding it well, her injury and the brace keeping her leg stable was starting to hurt her. 

Raven, who had run to her mate when she saw her puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks, was now filling cups with light, amber-colored ale and encouraging everyone to imbibe figuring it would help everyone get over the stress of the past hour. She and Abby had only gotten the mini version of what went down, but she figured a few drinks could only help the situation. 

Abby, on the other hand was doting on her favorite daughter-in-law and doing her level best to keep the conversation flowing. Now that everything was out in the open, Lexa and Svart were being shy with one another, and each sat on opposite sides of the table. Finally, she leaned over and whispered something in the omega’s ear that had Lexa nodding nervously. She handed a fussing Madi over to Clarke for diaper duty, and she walked over to her father.

There wasn’t a trace of the Commander now. Now there was only a love-starved daughter who wanted a hug, a long overdue hug from her father. Immediately sensing her need, as his need was no less great, the man rose from his seat and lifted his daughter off her feet the second he had her in his arms. 

He spun her around a few times then crushed her to him. His purr was so loud that even little Madi heard it from across the room where Clarke was trying to discreetly change her pup’s soiled diaper. The two dissolved into tears again, but this time they had smiles on their faces. 

“Ai mema oso yu (I missed you),” Svart confided. “Ai nonfri. Ai strik (little) Lexie. (My daughter. My little Lexie).

Raven cackled at the nickname and Lexa shot her a glare. “As your Heda I command you to never repeat that.”

“Sha Heda,” Raven said with a wink. “Of course.”

Svart was oblivious to this exchange. He continued to hold his daughter and smother her with love. “The day you had to leave with Anya, I knew you would become the first omega Commander. Don’t ask me how, I just knew. From the moment you were born, you were always special.”

Lexa snuggled her face into her father’s chest. “Nontu. Ai hod yu in. (Father. I love you.)”

“Ai hod yu in, Lexa.”

Clarke finally wandered over with a sleeping Madi in her arms. Lexa wondered how it always was that when her mate changed their little pup that she was able to soothe her enough that she fell asleep. Whenever Lexa took the job, Madi saw it as a game, and would fuss until Lexa tickled her belly or gently blew in her hair. It would make her baby smile and wiggle in her arms. For the first time just the day before, her pup had laughed at her nomon’s antics, and both her parents nearly melted with the cuteness of it all. 

So far, Madi had been the most astonishing pup. She rarely fussed, and thus far, she slept through the night, although that might have been due to the fact that even while in bed, Lexa made sure her hand was in between the bars of the crib so that she was touching Madi at all times. Clarke had griped that it wasn’t fair that the crib was on Lexa’s side of the bed, so being the fair diplomat, Lexa promised to move the crib to the other side of the bed so Clarke could do the same thing at night. They’d only just gotten their pup back for just over two weeks. That was not nearly enough time for them to get used to the idea of Madi being out of their sight, and they both knew it was going to be a battle of who got to hold her, touch her, feed her the most.

Clarke rocked Madi in her arms and looked at Svart. “Would you like to hold your granddaughter?”

“I…” Svart looked overwhelmed at the offer. “I…beja.”

He held out his arms, and Clarke carefully placed her sleeping child into them. “She looks just like you,” Svart said to Lexa, “but she has your nose,” he pointed out to Clarke.

“I’m going to let you three get acquainted.” Clarke grabbed Lexa’s hands and kissed her. “I’ll be right there with my mom if you need me.”

Clarke walked to the table but sat where she could see her family. Abby was next to her. “I don’t know if I have said it lately, but I am so very proud of you,” Abby said. She reached over and squeezed Clarke’s uninjured knee affectionately. “Up on the Ark, I wasn’t sure you would ever get the chance to start your own family, and I never thought you would have one so young, but what you have here,” Abby swept her arm out, “it’s…well, it’s…it’s made me so damn happy, and I am so proud to have you as my daughter.”

Clarke beamed. She was lucky to have such an amazing relationship with her mother, but it was rare for her mom to give compliments like she just had. Her father had been the one to smother her with love whereas Abby had always tried to be the disciplinarian, and the one to give Clarke’s life meaning and direction. She loved her daughter so much, but she wasn’t as effusive when it came to telling her daughter how much she loved her. That was going to change. Abby felt like she had a lot to make up to her daughter, especially after what happened to her father, and the doctor promised herself that there wouldn’t be another day that her daughter didn’t know how much she was loved, respected, and adored by her mother.

After some time, Lexa and Svart rejoined the group sitting at the table. Madi was back in her nomon’s arms and still asleep. 

“We should go back and join the celebration outside,” Lexa said. “I feel terrible that we abandoned all our friends, and this is Costia’s big day.”

Clarke stood. “It is, but I am sure she will forgive you. It’s kind of a big day for you too. I mean it’s not every day the dead come back to life,” the alpha smirked, “and now it has happened to you twice, first with Costia and now with your nontu (father).” For only one second Clarke looked sad. “Most of us would kill for a chance at that…but let’s go have fun. I, for one, would like something a little stronger than that beer.”

They started to walk out. Clarke had an arm around Lexa’s waist. Behind them Abby matched her strides with Svart. Clarke wasn’t sure, but she thought she heard her mom say that if he hurt Lexa or disappeared on the omega again there would be no place safe for him on Earth. She promised to gouge his eyes out with a spoon if he hurt his daughter again.

Clarke couldn’t help but turn and smile at her mom for that. Lexa had a fierce protector in Abby. Svart caught her eye and mouthed, “I promise I won’t hurt her.”

Then next morning, Clarke woke up with a splitting headache. She’d only had just the one drink at the celebration when she toasted to Costia, so she wasn’t feeling bad because of too much alcohol. 

She sat up on the side of the bed. Lexa was still sleeping with her hand outstretched to Madi. Clarke gently lifted her daughter out of the crib. She wrinkled her nose. “Time to get you cleaned up, and then we will go visit your komfoni (grandmother) and see if she has something for this headache.” 

It was a cool morning, so Clarke donned a pair of pants and a loose, long-sleeved shirt. She left Lexa a note that she was going to see her mother, and then she padded down the stairs to her mom’s room. It was two floors down from theirs.

Knocking quietly in case Abby wasn’t awake, Clarke only had to stand there for a few seconds before Abby opened the door. 

“Oh, ah Clarke. Good morning.” Abby’s hair was a mess, she was breathing hard, and her face was red.

“Were you expecting someone else?” Clarke asked suspiciously.

“No. Lexa promised that breakfast would be delivered since everyone was up so late.” 

“And what has your face so flushed?”

Just then, Clarke heard a loud snore coming from inside Abby’s room. She narrowed her eyes, but instead of getting mad as Abby clearly expected, she laughed.

“Is that Marcus I hear?”

If it was possible, Abby’s face got redder, confirming Clarke’s suspicion.

“I’ve known about you two forever, Mom. You’re not as good at hiding all the little touches and kisses as you think.” She pulled her mom in for a one-armed hug. “I am happy for you.”

She felt Abby relax in the embrace, relieved. “So, I won’t keep you, but I was wondering if you have something for a headache.”

“Is it a hangover?” Abby asked.

“No, I only had the one beer and then the one drink outside. I don’t know why my head hurts so bad.”

Abby gave her a knowing smile. “How is Lexa feeling this morning?”

“I don’t know. She is still sleeping.”

“Well, I think you will find that when she wakes up, she is going to have a similar headache.”

“But why would she? She didn’t drink that much either.”

“You really don’t know, do you?” Abby snickered. She patted Clarke’s cheek. “You have done so much in your short life, but you are still so young. You two are syncing up, sweetheart. Headaches, unfortunately are the first sign.”

“Uh, um,” Clarke stuttered dumbly. “Wait, you mean my rut and her heat?” Clarke jumped up and down. It made her head throb, but she didn’t care because it also made her pup giggle. “You mean my rut and her heat.” Clarke was overjoyed. She never expected that she would sync up with her mate so quickly. Not so soon after the battle and Madi’s birth. 

She skipped back and forth on her feet until she had a sudden thought. “Will Lexa be okay? It’s not too soon? What if I hurt her?”

“Oh, to be young again,” Abby teased. “You won’t hurt her, sweetheart. She wouldn’t go into heat if she wasn’t ready.” 

Clarke took a deep breath. “Does that…does that mean we can have another pup someday? I mean would she go into heat if she couldn’t?”

“Honey, I can’t answer that. She suffered greatly during her pregnancy with Madi, and a lot of damage was done.”

Clarke’s joy evaporated into sadness. She didn’t need but her one pup, but at the same time she dreamed of a large family. Mostly, she was angry for her mate. She hated that what was done to her omega might have stolen Lexa’s chance to have a big family. It wasn’t something they talked of but once, before the fall of the Mountain, but Lexa had expressed the desire to have a large family. At the time, she never thought she would get to have a family at all, but she had told Clarke that given the chance she wanted several children if possible. It had been a dream then, and now it was possible that her dream was shattered. All because of Titus, the Order, and Ontari.

Clarke wasn’t sure she was ready for another pup just yet. They had only just gotten Madi back, but it devastated her to think that Madi might be it for them. 

“Clarke, look at me.” When the alpha finally did, Abby said, “You two are so special. The freaky red and blue light thing you do proves that, so I think that also means that if the two of you desire to have another pup that it will happen for you. Be it through Lexa getting pregnant or through adoption, it is possible to have more pups.”

Clarke swiped at eyes she didn’t even realize were leaking. “You’re right, and I am going to take my rut coming as a positive sign.”

“That’s my girl, now why don’t you go see if Lexa’s heat is coming? If it is, you have about five days to prepare, and to get used to the idea that you will have to let me babysit your wee precious girl for about a week.” 

Clarke chuckled. “What if her heat isn’t coming?” 

“Let’s not worry about that now. I think you two are ready if nothing else except to reaffirm the love you have for one another. Now go to your mate.”

“Yes, Mom, and before the next time I see you, take a bath. You reek of Kane.” Clarke ducked when her mom tried to playfully slap her. 

Clarke practically ran back up the stairs to their quarters. She was out of breath when she opened the door, but the sight before her had her holding her beleaguered breath. She let out a huge breath of air then smiled.

Her mate was pinching the bridge of her nose with her eyes tightly shut.

“Hey, Lex.” Clarke walked over and gave her mate a kiss. 

“Not so loud. My head is killing me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, they will share their rut/heat next chapter. There's going to be some smut, but not a ton. There's going to be some heartwarming scenes between Lexa and Abby before things get hot and heavy with Clarke and Lexa, and it's going to be more about Clarke taking care of her mate. 
> 
> Thank you again for comments and kudos. If you are looking for other stuff to read after this chapter, I have a few other completed stories that you can check out.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa's heat/rut have synced up. There is more fluff than smut in this chapter. I have denoted the smut with *** if you don't want to read it. It's only a short bit. There's some more in the next chapter.
> 
> Happy reading.

Chapter 22

Clarke was antsy. She was also itchy. With her rut came the bodily changes that kept her exceedingly aroused at the same time as being unbearably uncomfortable. She didn’t mind the changes when she made love to Lexa out of her rut because as soon as she was no longer aroused, she would change back, but now that she was in rut, it meant that she would not change back to her more usual self for at least five to seven more days.

When it came to ruts, Clarke was a relative newbie having only experienced it one other time, and she wasn’t used to having her extra appendage stay for so long. It made her feel funny while she walked, and she had to shift herself a few times every time she sat to get comfortable. Fortunately, Anya pointed her in the direction of a vendor who sold special undershorts for female alphas. After donning a pair, Clarke found almost instant relief, and she went back and immediately procured six more pairs. `

Lexa on the other hand seemed to be blossoming. She had a glow about her, and her scent, already rich and addictive, became even more alluring to Clarke. The omega’s breasts had filled out, and they were sensitive to even the slightest touch. Of course, this was from the alpha’s point of view. 

To Lexa, she felt crampy, over-heated, and over-sensitive. She also found herself changing her undergarments several times per day due to a wetness between her legs that she couldn’t seem to stem. 

Her heat had never felt like this before. Parts of it were less unpleasant as she found she wasn’t having the pain that would usually grip her during each heat, but other parts were worse, weird and strange. She was unyieldingly hungry, and she found herself drinking far more water than she had ever needed during her pre-heat before. When asking Abby about it, the doctor told her this was normal for a mated omega. It was her body’s way of preparing for the marathon of sex she would be having. 

Abby had stated all this matter-of-factly and clinically, but it had Lexa blushing fiercely. 

The mates had just one more day before they would be fully synced, so they were frantically preparing to be by themselves for the next week or so. Their floor of the Tower would be abandoned except for when food was delivered to just outside their door. Madi’s crib had been moved to Abby’s room, and Clarke made her mom promise not to have Kane spend the night, at least not while Madi was there. It wasn’t that she minded them together, she didn’t. She couldn’t explain why she didn’t want him there at night. Lexa said it was just the protective alpha in her.

“He’s not family,” Lexa hip-checked her mate, “at least not yet, so you’re never going to be comfortable leaving Madi around him. Once your mother mates with him, you will find that you have no trouble with him being around Madi at all.” 

Not that Lexa was any better. After she made Raven give her and Abby radios so that they could be in contact if need be, she made Clarke’s mother promise to always carry the radio with her. She also assigned a gaggle of guards to her mother-in-law, much to the doctor’s chagrin. If Madi could not be with her, then Polis’ finest would be protecting her.

After their preparations were done, the alpha and omega spent the rest of their day with their daughter. They played, made her smile and laugh, and they snuggled when she took her nap. It was late in the evening when Lexa groaned and grabbed her stomach. She locked eyes with Clarke and found her mate to be sweating profusely and looking frighteningly ravenous. Their pup, fortunately, was blissfully asleep, and completely unaware of her parents’ sufferings.

“We need to get Madi to your mother now, Klark.”

Clarke didn’t respond. She was staring at her mate, and if Lexa wasn’t mistaken, she would have sworn she saw a tiny droplet of drool on her alpha’s chin. 

“Okay, scratch that. I am going to use the radio to call your mother and have her pick up our pup.” Clarke was still staring. “Klark…Klark.” 

Lexa was forced to percussively clap her hands in front of Clarke’s face, surprising her alpha out of whatever it was she was having, unfortunately, it also startled Madi and made her cry.

The omega scooped her daughter up. “Moba, ai strikon (Sorry, my little one). Dula op nou bon au (Do not cry).” She held her pup to her chest and poured out soothing pheromones until her pup quieted down. 

Clarke, who had finally started moving was on the radio with her mother. Her speech was halting, like she was having a hard time finding her words. The predatory look in her eyes when she gazed at Lexa explained her sudden lack of speech.

Lexa grabbed the radio in a panic, for she feared she would devolve into a sex-crazed mess like her mate if she didn’t act soon. She spoke in rapid sentences with Abby, and in mere minutes, the good doctor was there to care for the wee child while her parents connected and affirmed their union in the most natural and intimate of ways.

Before she left, Abby pulled Lexa into the hall. Inside, Clarke was already panting with need and unable to focus on her mother’s words.

“I am aware that you have experienced several heats before, but I also know you went through them on your own. I want you to understand that this is going to be one of the best experiences of your life. Most of us take our mate during a heat/rut event, so it can be awkward at first, and sometimes a little sloppy, but because you are already mated, it is going to be different for the two of you. You already know and love each other so much, and that’s going to make this special.” 

Abby squeezed the silent omega’s shoulders. “Clarke’s going to be a little scary at first. She’s only had her rut the one other time, and that was after the devastation of the Mountain, so it wasn’t the usual experience for an alpha undergoing their first rut on their own. For my girl, this may as well be her first one, and she’s probably going to lose control.”

Lexa was getting nervous. 

“Don’t worry, she’s not going to hurt you,” Abby reassured as she went on. “She just might be a little overzealous at first. Trust your instincts to guide you, and thus to guide her. I know you two have already had sex many, many times,” Lexa went red, “so at least this isn’t completely new territory for you, but guide your alpha. Let her know if she’s going to fast or too slow, and don’t be afraid to use the Commander in you to order her to do or not do something if you need to. She may be the alpha, but you are the one in charge of this entire experience.”

All Lexa could do was nod.

Abby reached for something in her pocket. “Here.” She handed Lexa a pouch with some pills in it. “These are fertility pills.”

Lexa blinked in surprise. 

“Normally, a synced heat and rut are an almost guarantee of pregnancy, but with the trauma you experienced, I don’t know if that will hold true. These pills could help that if you want to have another pup this soon.”

The omega looked sad and excited all at the same time, but still didn’t speak.

“I don’t know if you would want another pup so soon after this one, but if you do, take the pills, one per day, and after your heat is over, I will monitor you every day until we know for sure if you are carrying a pup or not.”

Abby went on. “There’s no guarantee that they will work, but they will give you a fighting chance, or you can leave it up to Mother Nature to decide if you will get pregnant again or not and wait and see what happens. It’s up to you, Lexa.”

She handed Lexa another pouch, one filled with tea leaves. “If you want to make sure you don’t get pregnant, drink this every night.” 

Lexa quickly handed the pouch with the tea back, and Abby gave her a knowing but guarded smile. “I wish I could say with certainty either way about whether you will be with child or not at the end of this heat but know that no matter what happens the woman in there, my daughter, she loves you so much, and she will be happy with just you and Madi, or with just you and ten other pups.”

Lexa shook her head at the terrifying thought of having ten children and Abby laughed. “She will love you no matter what. You are her world, Lexa. I have never seen my pup so happy before. You have given her a world I could never have dreamed of for her, not even in my wildest imaginings, and therefore, it means that you have given me that world too. You gave me a grandchild, and for that I will never be able to thank you enough.”

Abby crushed the dazed girl to her. “I’m going to take Madi now, and don’t worry about her. I promise that she will be okay and that I will always have the radio with me. Call me at any time day or night if you need anything, and that includes motherly advice.”

“Mochof (Thank you) Abby.” Lexa finally whispered, nearly as incapable of words as her mate. She turned to go but stopped. “Ai hod yu in, nomon.” The omega looked shy. “I should have told you before now.”

Abby wiped tears from her eyes. For Lexa to accept her the way that she had, and to call her nomon might have been just as exciting and overwhelming as when Clarke called her Mama for the first time. She couldn’t resist it and went in for another hug. “I love you too. Now get going before my baby girl explodes in there.”

Lexa walked back through the door. She made sure to shut and lock it tightly. She didn’t expect any interruptions, but she wanted to be sure no one would be able to interrupt them. She scanned the room and was surprised not to see her half-crazed mate standing there. Their abode was flooded with Clarke’s strong alpha scent, and it was so strong that she couldn’t pinpoint where her mate had gone. 

She first went to their bedroom, then to the balcony, the sitting room and finally into the bathroom before finding Clarke. To her surprise, her mate had lit every candle they owned, and was running a bath. The alpha was naked and leaning over checking the water temperature. It gave Lexa the ideal view of the blonde’s perfectly sculpted backside. She had been teased about it before when she said it out loud once, but Clarke had an amazingly fine ass. 

She was stunned that her mate had enough control to run them a bath. When she had left to go into the hall with Abby, Clarke had been leering at her, and the omega though for sure that the instant she walked through the door she would be set upon. She was only mildly disappointed when that didn’t happen.

She was ready to be taken by her mate. Every second that went by caused the need to grow, so to find her mate calmly checking the temperature of the bath water threw her for a bit of a loop.

“Klark,” she said as she shucked her own clothing so that she could match her mate’s state of undress.

The blonde lifted her head and smiled, and almost looked like herself, but it was her eyes that betrayed her false demeanor. When the alpha looked upon Lexa, it was with the keen eye of an animal knowing that its hunt was a sure thing. There could be a chase if she wanted there to be one, but Clarke already knew that Lexa was hers.

Instead of jumping her as Lexa expected, Clarke instead leaned past her to grab a bottle of scented soap and a soft cloth. The alpha didn’t say anything, and the omega wasn’t sure if it was because her mate was incapable of speech or if she was toying with her. It didn’t matter, whatever web Clarke was weaving, Lexa was going to walk into it willingly.

The blonde raked her eyes over her mate appreciatively, and she finally, finally moved to touch her. Fingertips callused from ten months of surviving on her own, confidently started at Lexa’s shoulders and slowly slid down to take her hands. She led Lexa to the water and helped her into the tub. 

The omega expected Clarke to get in with her, but she didn’t. The alpha’s voice was raspy and deep when she said, “Let me take care of you, love.”

The blonde sat herself upon a stool and proceeded to use the cloth and soap to carefully clean her mate, at least that’s what it seemed like she was doing, but it wasn’t. The cloth was a merely a device that allowed Clarke to touch every inch of her mate’s skin, and the way she was touching Lexa, they may have well be making love especially when the cloth lingered around pert, responsive nipples and then moved lower to the scar on the omega’s abdomen. 

Clarke took extra care when she used the cloth to caress the raised and red line that spread across Lexa’s lower belly. The wound had healed nicely, but the scar it left behind was an ugly and daily reminder to the omega of what she had gone through while imprisoned. 

Every morning in the mirror, she would stare at the scar and run her fingers over it, reminding herself that she almost hadn’t made it to her mate with the news of their pup’s birth. She had been so ill running through that forest, and it was a miracle that she had gotten as far as she had. She often wondered if Clarke hadn’t had to leave her camp due to the water running dry if her alpha would ever have found her.

“Stop it,” came her mate’s command.

“Stop what?” 

“Stop thinking about what could have happened.” Clarke dipped her head to kiss a damp shoulder. “I know where your thoughts go when you see your scar, but I want you to stop it.”

“It’s not so easy, Klark.”

“I know it isn’t, but instead of thinking of all the things that could have happened, I want you to gaze upon this scar and think of what did happen.” Clarke dropped the cloth and ran a gentle finger over the scar. “Without this, we would not have our amazing, gorgeous, hair-pulling child. Without this scar, there might be no us. Without it, we may never have found our way back to one another. It’s a badge of courage, Lex. There’s not a person on Earth that could have done what you did.”

Lexa reached down and took the hand that was caressing her. “Ai…” Her voice broke. Clarke was correct. The omega was looking at it all wrong. It was a marring of the skin that she should have been wearing with pride, not regret or sadness. 

Clarke chuckled. “It seems it is your turn to lose your words.”

Lexa didn’t get the chance to form any words after that. Clarke captured her mouth with hers, kissing her as her fingers dipped lower and into the folds between her mate’s legs that were impossibly wetter than the water they were submerged in.

They both moaned at the touch, and Clarke continued to move her fingers as she worked her mate into a lather, and not the soapy kind.

Below the tower, and in a dark tavern sat a group of delinquents along with Raven, Anya, Costia and Echo. All were getting drunk. It was only the first night of Lexa and Clarke’s heat, but already they were all bored. Without their leaders to guide and entertain them, they all found themselves at a loss for something to do.

“This is pathetic,” Raven slurred. “We really need them to have fun?”

“I know,” Octavia said excitedly. “Let’s have a scavenger hunt. I will get Indra to hide a list of items all around the Tower, and the first person to get the most items gets to sneak into the Tower and spy on our Hedas.”

Gasps and disgusted noises went around the room. “Who would want to listen to that?” Bellamy asked. He had his arm around a girl named Gina. 

Raven grinned. “I would. Those two are damn sexy.”

Anya playfully smacked her shoulder and Raven turned and clacked her teeth at her mate, pretending to bite her. “I don’t know Ahn, if we won and we listened in, it might spur my heat on and maybe even your rut, and then we would be the ones who got to have a week off spending sexy time with each other.”

“Where’s Indra?” Anya stood to look for the Wormana making the group burst into laughter.

Just then a wide-eyed Aden walked in. He looked a little pale and upset. He ran to Anya. “General, you need to come quickly. I think Heda and Wanheda are in trouble.” He was out of breath like he had just run down every stair in the tower, which is exactly what he had done.

“Slow down strikon. Tell me what’s going on.” Anya said patiently although she suspected she knew what was up.

“I wanted to know why Heda and Wanheda’s floor had been abandoned. I was going to see Heda, but there were no guards, and Gustus wouldn’t let me take the elevator to see them, so I snuck up to their floor, but when I got there, it sounded like there was fighting going on, and it sounded like things were being thrown around.” Each word came out as a gasp as he tried to catch his breath. “It seemed like they were being hurt. I wanted to rush in and protect them, but I decided to come and get you instead since I was all by myself.”

Now the entire tavern was practically rolling on the floor with amusement. 

Raven stood and put her arm around the Nightblood’s shoulder. “I’ve got this.” She looked at Aden. “I think it is time for you to learn about the birds and the bees, little man.”

Aden was too big to be picked up, but Anya immediately stood and swept the boy into her arms. “Oh, no you don’t. I won’t having you polluting his innocent ears with whatever it is you plan to tell him.”

Anya tucked the boy under her arm and ran out the door with him, holding him like he was a sack of potatoes. Costia kissed Echo and said, “Stay here. I am going to go after her. I don’t trust Anya much more than I trust Raven to get this right.”

Raven pouted. “As if those two will do better teaching that poor boy about what his heat will be like better than another omega. Fucking alphas.”

“Don’t worry, Raven,” Octavia said. “I am sure that boy will be coming to you for advice soon enough. I doubt Heda will be able to tell him without dying of embarrassment.” Octavia slapped Raven on the back and then went to get a beer.

Octavia turned to Lincoln. “Think Aden could sneak me up there? I bet I am small enough to fit through the vents.”

The man looked frightened by the thought. “Do that and you will get us both banished to the Dead Zone.”

***

Clarke stood from her spot next to the tub and helped lift her thoroughly sated omega from the water. Lexa had the look of someone who had just experienced something so utterly sublime that she could live the rest of her life having experienced it just the once.

The problem was that Clarke had taken care of her mate at the expense of her own desire, and she was so uncomfortably hard that instead of drying her mate off, she lifted her over her shoulder, making Lexa squeal, and almost ran to their bed, depositing Lexa unceremoniously on the furs.

Studying Lexa as the omega sprawled out on the bed, Clarke could see that her mate was ready for her (if the glistening between her legs meant anything). The alpha was about to move forward when Lexa took her by absolute surprise and flipped herself over and got on her hands and knees. To present herself this way to her alpha was a true act of submission. Clarke roared as she moved forward and grasped Lexa’s hips. Everything in her was screaming to ram herself, hard, into her mate. She pawed at Lexa’s back, unsure. She didn’t want to hurt Lexa by accident. 

“Ai laik ogud Klark, beja hon daun ai (I am ready Klark, please take me).” 

Clarke was nowhere near the crazed alpha that Abby had warned her about. That, or her mate was far better at managing her baser urges than most. Lexa could feel her mate’s need, it fairly radiated off her as physical heat and pheromones, and Lexa was responding as she had never before. She let her inner omega go. She wanted her alpha to lose it. She wanted to be taken, and after it was over, she wanted to kneel before her uncharacteristically controlled mate. Everything in the omega wanted to submit to this gentle, caring, powerful, and radiant alpha.

“Beja, Klark, beja.”

Clarke’s fingers flexed where they held Lexa’s hips. Feather light kisses moved from the base of Lexa’s neck to the tip of her spine, and it had the omega begging for more. She was so ready that her mate was driving her insane.

“Kl…ahhhh.” Instead of feeling Clarke enter her, the alpha’s long tongue dipped into her instead, instantly sending Lexa over a cliff at the unexpected feeling. In that moment, the alpha was her master. The blonde swept her tongue into her and then over the omega’s engorged clit sending her to heights she had never experienced before. The alpha was in control, and it had Lexa simultaneously bowing her head and arching her back to her mate. 

She screamed out in pleasure as Clarke took her time with her until she became incapable of sound. Then and only then did her mate enter her with one hard thrust. 

Behind her, Clarke roared again, letting everyone in the tower, and perhaps all of Polis, know that Lexa was hers. She set a punishing pace; thrusting so hard that she had to hold her omega up. Under her, the omega became a mewling, drooling mess. She came completely undone. She fisted the furs under her and clenched her jaw as her mate sent her to places she had never been before, and just when she was going to beg for even more, the blonde let out a guttural moan.

So into her own pleasure, Lexa was hardly aware of her mate’s knot slipping into her. She only became aware when Clarke’s hard thrusts became shallow. It didn’t mean they were any less powerful. 

Clarke reached around her to grasp each breast as her teeth found the mating mark on Lexa’s neck. The alpha bit down hard sending them crashing through the most powerful orgasm either of them had ever experienced before. Clarke filled her mate with seed, and they both prayed to Keyron (the spirit) that it would take hold and bless them with another pup.

After a minute, and before Clarke’s arms could fail from exhaustion causing her to collapse on her mate, the alpha rolled the two of them onto their sides. She kept her grip on Lexa’s neck with her teeth and her palms on each breast. She casually massaged with her fingers, making Lexa purr.

She jogged her hips a few more times, emptying into Lexa again and finally let go with her teeth.

***

“Ain (mine),” she growled. 

“Sha, ai alpha.”

Lexa was a puddle next to her mate. She felt completely boneless.

“I didn’t hurt you, did I?” Clarke asked as she nuzzled her nose into Lexa’s hair.

Lexa shook her head. “No, that was…that was…”

Just then there was a skittering noise above them, and Lexa swore she heard restrained giggling.

Clarke started to growl, and if she hadn’t been tied to Lexa, she would have stormed over to the air duct and ripped it out of the wall.

The alpha sniffed the air and howled. “Octavia kom Skaikru and Aden kom Trikru, so help me if I hear you in those vents again, you will be spending the rest your lives with sore backsides. Don’t think you are going to get away with spying on us.” Based on their scents, Octavia was nearby in the vents. Aden’s scent was more subtle which was his only saving grace. He was hopefully far enough away to not have heard them, and Clarke vowed to make Octavia pay for corrupting the boy.

The entirety of Lexa was bright red thinking that Octavia had been able to see them, but Clarke assured her that the vent would have blocked her view. She would only have been able to hear them. This didn’t help the poor omega. If possible, her blush deepened.

The tied pair could hear the two troublemakers backing their way out of the vent. 

Instead of being mad, Lexa chuckled. “Don’t be angry, Klark. Only weeks ago, had they dared to do something like this I would have been forced to whip them to within an inch of their lives. Now, though, they can be the kids they never got to be.”

Clarke growled. She didn’t want people spying on them especially during their rut and heat. 

“Don’t worry, niron, they will be punished, but it won’t end up with them recovering for a week with the fisa (doctor).”

“I don’t know,” Clarke snarled, “it might. I am thinking a very public spanking over the knees of their Hedas will be a fitting punishment followed by about four months of mucking out the stables.”

Clarke pulled Lexa impossibly closer to her when she felt the omega’s laughter bubble out of her.

“I am serious,” she complained.

“I know, and I agree.” Lexa turned her head and tried to look at her mate. “I was picturing Octavia over your knee with her bare backside exposed for all of Polis to see. I can guarantee she won’t ever by spying on us again. Aden either.” 

“Good, because they may not have to spend time with the fisa when I am done with them, but I will ensure that they can’t sit properly for at least seven days.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, Abby is just the best, but so is Clarke. She didn't devolve into a sex-crazed alpha and she took care of her mate.
> 
> Aden and Octavia had better find a good place to hide when these two finally emerge from their room, especially Octavia...trying to corrupting Aden that way. Although, he still has no idea what was going on. Thank goodness. He was way back in that vent and heard nothing. 😉
> 
> For anyone who might be interested, and who hasn't already read it, I posted a new chapter of Modified Independent. I thought the story was complete, but then new chapter sprung out of me. I hope you will check it out.
> 
> As always, I look forward to your comments and kudos.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, how time flies. I saw on social media that it has been five years since we last saw Lexa alive on our screens, that is unless you have re-watched a bunch of times like I have. It's truly amazing to me the impact this character has had on so many of us. When you look at it, she wasn't part of The 100 for long, but in a way she was a part of The 100 the entire time. We never forgot her, and we never forgave how her arc ended. Also, for many of us, her appearance in our lives came at exactly the right time. 
> 
> I can't exactly find the words I am looking for right now. Let's just say that Lexa and Clarke have had a huge impact on so many lives, and it is thanks to readers like you that we keep them alive. Without all of you, those of us who write would probably stop. I know many authors say they write for themselves, and in part, that is true, but we also write for you. Knowing you are out there and reading theses stories keeps these characters alive, and they are so much better than they ever were on the show. So, thank you for reading.
> 
> Be on the lookout for *** if you aren't interested in reading the smut. I hadn't intended to write any this chapter, but Lexa had a mind of her own and ran away with the end of this chapter.

Chapter 23

Clarke carried her soaking wet mate into the bathroom and set her on a stool as she went to fill the tub with warm water. They’d just had a marathon of sex on their balcony during the craziest, wildest, and noisiest storm Clarke had ever seen. The thought that they could have been struck by lightning, leaving Madi parentless, had never crossed the alpha’s mind as she thrust into her mate from behind.

Lexa had clung to the balcony railing and screamed like a banshee as her alpha dominated her in the best way possible. With the crashing of thunder above them, no one could hear their screams, moans, wails, and professions of love for each other. 

It was day seven of their combined heat and rut, and it was only just now that Clarke could feel her need for her mate starting to recede. Before it could, she wanted to bathe with her mate and take her one more time. She wanted to finish out their time of solitude not having sex with her mate but making love to her. 

This time, she got into the tub with Lexa when the water was the right temperature. She lifted Lexa from the stool. She thought her lighter than when she had lifted her into the tub a week ago, and it made perfect sense. Although food had been delivered to them each day, they barely took the time to eat any of it. Between their sexcipades, being tied together, and sleep, they had taken little time to eat and no time to bathe, and while she didn’t mind their mixture of their combined scents, she knew they stank. 

It was time to get clean.

Clarke lit scented candles, and grabbed every bottle of soap, shampoo, conditioner, and oil she could get her hands on. She sniffed one bottle of oil and found it pleasing, so she poured a little bit into the water. She then settled Lexa in front of her so she could wash her hair. 

Lexa moaned at the feeling of soft fingers in her hair. That was until Clarke got caught on a tangle. 

“Ouch.”

“Sorry, love. We probably shouldn’t have waited so long to bathe. Your hair is a tangled, knotted mess.”

At the word knotted, Clarke felt Lexa clench between her legs making her laugh. “Don’t worry. I think we have a few more hours left before we go back to being regular people again. I plan to be tied to you at least one more time before all this is over.”

Lexa melted into Clarke. For the past week, her alpha had taken care of her like no one ever had before. Not once did her mate put her needs before her own, and now Lexa wanted to repay the favor. 

After Clarke finished washing her hair, she let the alpha bathe her, but the second she was done, she reversed their positions in the tub. It wasn’t easy, and there might have been more water out of the tub than in it when she finished, but it got the job done. With her alpha in front of her, she took the bottle of shampoo and dumped a healthy amount into dark matted hair. Gone was the shining, lustrous hair that Lexa loved to card her fingers through. In front of her was a mass of dirty hair that only started to brighten back to its normal golden color as she started to wash.

In front of her, Clarke started to purr. Lexa had never done this for her before. She’d never had the chance, and next to being inside her mate, the alpha thought this might be the best thing she had ever felt.

Lexa took her time untangling each knot. She took so long, they had to add more hot water to the tub. As she used her fingers, and then a comb, to sus out each tangle, she would place tiny kisses onto the blonde’s freckled shoulders, onto her jaw line, and the shell of each ear. 

When she finally finished, Clarke was vibrating with need, but Lexa made her wait. She used a cup to rinse Clarke’s hair, and then she combed it again. She took a cloth and washed every inch of her alpha that she could reach. 

When she reached Clarke’s long length, she almost got distracted. Her need was no less great than her mate’s, but she wanted to draw out this last experience. She wanted to make it last as long as possible.

Her desire for her mate, and her desire to be with her daughter were battling fiercely, but she had enough control to slow the last few hours she would have with her mate like this. It would be months again before they would share this experience together again; maybe longer if the stars were aligned and she was already with pup. 

Thinking of pups, Lexa had been infinitely grateful when on the second day of them being alone together, an electronic tablet had been slid under their door. Curious, Clarke had turned on the machine to find it loaded with videos and pictures from the two days Madi had been with Abby. There must have been fifty pictures already, and somehow, each day, Raven (because it had to be her) sent new pictures and videos to them. 

Lexa made sure to keep the tablet nearby, and every time they had a chance, they would look at the pictures of their pup. 

“We need to get something nice for your mother and Raven for this,” Lexa had said. “This is probably the best gift I have ever been given next to your giving me Madi.”

“If we are lucky, maybe she won’t be our only gift,” Clarke had said as she pushed the tablet aside and started to kiss down Lexa’s neck.

Lexa abruptly stood from the tub, pulling Clarke up with her. She turned her mate so that the blonde was facing her. The omega’s eyes were sparkling with hope as she took her alpha’s hands and placed them on her belly.

“I know Abby said that there is a good chance that I can’t have pups again, but she also gave me hope when she spoke with me in the hall and gave me those pills,” Lexa began. Her voice was deeper and huskier than usual. “I think there is a real chance we have already made another pup, Klark, but I want to try one last time before this is all over.”

Startled blue eyes scanned over every inch of Lexa’s face, and Clarke’s fingers twitched over the skin of Lexa’s belly. “Do…do you really believe that? Do you think…” Clarke got on her knees in the tub and kissed all over Lexa’s exposed abdomen. She looked up at Lexa. “Do you really think there is already a child growing in there?”

“I can’t be certain, but something inside me feels different. It feels the same way as last time, except then I didn’t know what I was feeling then. I…eeee…”

Lexa didn’t get the chance to finish her statement. Clarke had her in her arms and out of the tub in a split second. She deposited her mate on the bed. The alpha’s voice was gravely. “If there isn’t a baby in there already, there will be when I am through with you.” 

The alpha hadn’t been sure before her rut fully started that she was ready for another child yet, but the thought of experiencing a pregnancy with Lexa had Clarke pouncing onto her mate, and the pair spent their last few hours of their solitude making love with a new hope in their hearts.

Two weeks went by with the blonde constantly pestering her mother. Every day she would ask Abby when a pregnancy test could be done, and every day it was the same answer. Finally, the day was there that Lexa could take a test to tell them if she was with pup or not.

In that time, Lexa and Clarke had been nervous wrecks. There had been meetings with ambassadors, and Lexa spent time daily training with the Nightbloods, but she couldn’t fully focus on her duties. Each day that went by sowed more doubt into the omega’s mind that perhaps she was wrong, and she hadn’t gotten pregnant. 

One thing that helped her was her daily sparring sessions with Anya, and surprisingly with Svart. After the revelation that he was still alive, Lexa’s heat had hit too quickly for her to continue getting to know her father, or to get Anya back for hiding the secret for so long. As soon as her heat had subsided, Lexa had Anya in the fighting ring every day and trounced her from one side of it to the other. Of course, Anya wasn’t trying very hard not to be beaten. Between her guilt over hiding something so important from her Heda, and the threats Clarke had made that if she hurt her possibly pregnant mate that there would be hell to pay, she didn’t put much effort behind each strike that she made.

Lexa was aware of this but didn’t care too much. She enjoyed kicking the stuffing out of her fos every day. 

When Svart offered to spar with her, Lexa had been leery. He was twenty years her senior which was by no means old, but it wasn’t young anymore either, and the man was too lean and wiry after a life spent in hiding and on the run.

She had eventually given in and sparred with the man and found him a capable fighter. To her astonishment, he had actually taught her a thing or two. Where Anya gave a half-assed attempt to defend herself, Svart did everything he could to defeat his daughter during each match, only to be struck down by her every time.

The pride in his eyes shone just as bright as Clarke’s did those days. Afterwards, he would walk with Lexa, getting to know his daughter and allowing her time to get used to having him in her daily life.

It wasn’t easy at first. Their conversation was stilted, and they were still shy with each other, but eventually the conversation started to flow, and their father-daughter relationship grew. 

It warmed Clarke’s heart to see them slowly becoming close. Lexa deserved a father figure in her life. From the time she was taken from Svart, Titus had been the only father figure Lexa had known, and look how that turned out. The alpha had worried that Lexa wouldn’t be willing to let Svart in, so it made her happy that Lexa was willing to give him a chance.

When Lexa wasn’t spending time with Anya or Svart, Clarke did everything that she could trying to reassure her mate and assuage her fears about her possible pregnancy. She too was nervous that Lexa would no longer be able to bear pups. Mostly, though, she felt bad for her Lexa. She could see the doubt and fear eating away at her mate, and all she wanted was for her omega to be happy.

She did her best to keep the omega smiling, and between her and Madi, she did a pretty good job, but she could see the stress wearing on Lexa, so she was elated when the day finally arrived that they would know for sure if they were having another child.

While they walked to where Abby had set up a clinic, Clarke could feel Lexa’s nerves ratcheting up. The omega was holding Madi in her arms, and the pup was beginning to squirm, sensing her nomon’s anxiety. 

Clarke tried to reassure her mate that no matter what the test said that she would still adore the omega no matter what. She ran a gentle hand through Madi’s hair and sent out pheromones meant to calm them both.

The blonde worried that Lexa’s thoughts were harkening back to the days when people only saw worth in an omega if the omega could bear pups. It was an archaic way of thinking, but Clarke could understand why Lexa would think that. Certainly, the Order and Titus hadn’t helped that. They didn’t push omegas to be bred, but they didn’t exactly foster thoughts of equality or an omega’s worth as a valuable member in society.

Before they reached Abby’s clinic, Clarke stopped her mate. She pulled her into a dark corner and got on her knees in front of her. She leaned in and kissed her mate’s slim, muscled belly. 

“I want you to know that I love you, and no matter what, there is nothing in this world that will change that…not ever.” She shifted and sat back on her heels looking up at her anxious mate. “If your test comes back negative today, then we try again, and if it comes back negative every time, then it was meant to be. I will always love you, and so will Madi. Not being able to have another pup does not mean you are not worthy, or that something is wrong with you. You have a family who will always love you unconditionally.” 

Clarke stood and gathered her mate to her. “That being said I am feeling good about this.” She nuzzled her nose into Lexa’s scent gland. “It’s subtle, but your scent has changed.”

“That doesn’t mean anything,” Lexa protested. “That could simply be stress.”

“I disagree. The nose knows. They say a sire is always the first to know, and I think the change in your scent means something exciting is happening in you.”

“Who is this ‘they’ you are always talking about?”

Clarke ignored Lexa’s words and instead gave Lexa a radiant smile. The blonde was purring when she stood. “I didn’t tell you, but at first, I thought maybe it was too soon to have another pup. We are still so young, but if life has taught me anything, if you have taught me anything, it’s that life is more than about just surviving. We deserve better than that.” 

The alpha leaned in and kissed the tip of Lexa’s nose. “While I hid away in the forest, that’s all I was doing, and of course, that’s all you were able to do while imprisoned, but now we have the chance to have so much more, to do so much more, and…” she took Lexa’s hands and kissed them, “…and if we can do it with a family, big or small, then it will mean that much more. That we are still so young is a blessing. It gives us that much more time to appreciate what we have.” She pulled Lexa to her. “It gives me that much more time to appreciate you and this amazing, wonderful, never could have imagined living like this in my wildest dreams life you have given me.”

Clarke was going to go on, but Lexa held a long finger against her lips, shushing her mate nonverbally. “Mochof, niron. I don’t know how you do it, but you always make me feel better, and for the record, I love you too, more than I ever thought possible. You have given me everything I could have ever wanted, and I hope you are correct that my scent is different, because I want to have more pups with you, but if that is not our destiny, I will accept that.”

Clarke adjusted the collar of Lexa’s shirt. It was one of the alpha’s shirts that the brunette had taken a liking to, and it secretly drove the blonde wild when she wore it. “I am glad, but like I said, I have a good feeling about today.”

The omega went to move back into that hall, but Clarke stopped her one more time. “While we are in with my mom, I want you to remember that you are special and so very loved.”

Lexa blushed and adjusted Madi so the pup was resting on her hip.

“And it’s not just me. It’s Madi, my mom, Anya, Svart, Raven, practically all of Skaikru including the delinquents, and all of your people. They know how special you are, and they love you. You know who else loves you? The Nightbloods, especially Aden.”

Lexa smiled thinking of the boy. She wasn’t supposed to play favorites, but Aden was by far the Natblida she loved the most. 

“I am only special because you elevate me. You lift me up.”

“That’s not true,” Clarke protested. “You elevate yourself. If you didn’t, you would never have become Heda.”

Lexa gave Clarke a small smile. She appreciated what her alpha was doing for her, and she knew that no one believed in her more than her mate did. 

She was finally able to pull Clarke back into the hall. “Let’s go see Abby. I want to get this over with.”

“Okay, love. Let’s go prove that my nose knows.”

The blonde was pacing “Mom, hurry up,” Clarke demanded.

“Patience is a virtue, sweetheart.” Abby sing-songed back. She was just finishing taking Lexa’s blood. She held a cotton ball to the small puncture in the omega’s arm. “I only need five more minutes, and you will know.”

She patted Lexa’s arm. “Your scent has changed. Did you know that?”

“I told you so,” Clarke said, bobbing nervously around the room. She looked at her mother. “I already told her, but I don’t think she believed me.”

The blonde moved to sit next to Lexa. Heda was looking positively green, her nerves were so bad, and Clarke’s bouncing leg didn’t help. Lexa gripped her knee, making the alpha cease her movement. 

“Would you stop that?” Lexa grumped.

“Moba, ai hodnes (Sorry, my love).”

Abby turned back to them, and she was smiling hugely. “Congratulations, you two. You are going to have another pup.”

Clarke launched out of her seat, taking Lexa with her. She spun her around and around. “We are going to be mothers again.”

Lexa was overjoyed, but she still looked nervous. Catching onto this, Abby said once Clarke stopped their spinning, “I want you to know you will have the very best medical care. This isn’t going to be like your last pregnancy. You are going to be surrounded by love, over-fed if my daughter has anything to do with it, and there won’t be any trauma this time. I will make sure to bring everything we need from Arkadia and have Raven use her solar panels to get everything working. I was planning to go back there for a while, but I won’t leave until after you have had this child, or maybe ever. I could hardly stand the thought of leaving you two and my grandpups. I doubt after the next little one is born that I will ever be able to leave.”

Madi, who had been carefully deposited in a shallow wicker basket that the fisas, and now Abby, used for their littlest patients, cooed sensing her parent’s jubilation.

Clarke blew raspberries at her, making her daughter wiggle and smile. “You’re going to have a little brother or sister.” She picked Madi up. 

She drew Lexa to her with her free arm. “I can’t believe we are going to have another pup. On the Ark, you would have been floated for that.” She grimaced and shoved away that thought. “In all the years the Ark circled the Earth, Bellamy and Octavia are the only people to have a sibling…well, I guess that includes Jasper now too, but we just found that out.”

Abby ruffled Clarke’s hair, making the alpha growl. “You, my dear, are also the first of us to have a child, let alone two. I think people are still nervous, thinking that the laws on the Ark still apply down here. We need to do a better job of making sure our people know it’s okay to expand their families.”

Clarke ducked out from under her mother’s hand. “Well, that’s going to be for you and Kane to work on. The only thing I need to focus on now is my mate, and our new little one.”

Lexa preened at this. She remembered the deep, aching emptiness she felt not having her mate near her while going through what should have been the most momentous occasion of her life. The Order had ripped that from her. This time would be different. This time Clarke would be by her side the entire time.

Lexa looked up shyly at Abby. “Clarke told me once that you have something that will show me the heartbeat of the pup, that we can even know the sex. Can you show me that now?”

Abby hugged Lexa too her. “I can’t show you yet, but soon. Right now, your pup isn’t even as big as a tiny seed. When he or she is about six weeks old, we might be able to hear the heartbeat, but chances are it will be a few weeks after that. It won’t be until about weeks eighteen to twenty that we will be able to find out the gender of your pup, if you want to know it.”

“I want to know,” Clarke said immediately, “but only if you do too,” she reassured her mate.

“I would like that.” Lexa’s cheeks were flushed with happiness. She’s already been pregnant once, but this time it was going to be entirely different.

“Would it be too soon to tell our friends that we are pregnant?” Lexa asked.

“That’s a personal decision,” Abby informed her. “Some people like to wait, to make sure the pregnancy sticks, but you can tell anyone you want anytime you want.”

Abby laughed at her jubilant daughter. “If this one has anything to do with it, everyone will know by tonight, even if she doesn’t say anything.”

As it turned out, Abby was correct. Clarke left the tower with Lexa and Madi to go find Svart and Anya. Those were the only two people they wanted to share their exciting news with, but the way the blonde strutted her stuff like an overstuffed peacock, the first delinquent they saw, who happened to be Bellamy, figured it out right away.

At first, he had looked at his friend quizzically, and then a broad smile covered his face. He roughly clapped Clarke on the back and gave Lexa a gentle squeeze on the shoulder. All he said was, “Congratulations you two.”

It seemed after that, they somehow ran into every one of Clarke’s friends. They also ran into Costia and Echo who had waited in Polis to find out the results of Heda and Wanheda’s exhaustive sexy times. 

Before her heat had fully kicked in, Lexa had spent a great deal of time with Costia, worried about what her first heat with Clarke would be like and worrying that she might not ever be able to have pups again.

Costia being the wonderful friend that she was, reassured her Heda and helped to calm her fears. She had also promised that she wouldn’t leave Polis until she knew that everything was going to be okay. She didn’t want to leave only to hear that Lexa wasn’t able to get pregnant again. She wanted to be near in case her friend needed her. 

When Clarke and Lexa finally found Svart and Anya, all of Polis knew that their Heda was with pup, and already the celebrations had begun. Lexa and Clarke may not have wanted everyone to know so soon, but they were happy that their people had yet another reason to celebrate. Times were changing in Polis and the Coalition, and the Hedas hoped that there would be far more celebrating and much less fighting in their future. 

By the time the evening was over, Clarke was stumbling drunk. Person after person had raised a glass with the sire. Lexa didn’t mind. Her mate had never gotten the chance to revel in the life she had helped create the first time. She wasn’t going to begrudge her proud mate her celebration this time.

When they got back their chambers, Lexa made her mate drink glass after glass of water, and then after putting Madi to bed, she helped her mate undress and took off her uncomfortable brace for her. She deposited her naked mate on the bed and quickly got ready herself. She was feeling unusually amorous, and she wanted her mate now. She draped a fur over the side of Madi’s crib, obscuring any view the pup might have, and then she made love to her beautiful blonde alpha.

They had spent so much time lying with one another, but one of the things Lexa had never been able to do was enjoy Clarke’s body before the alpha got so aroused that things ‘down there’ changed. She’d never gotten to run her fingers through her alpha’s silky folds before, and it was something that she wanted, no needed, to do immediately. 

***

Clarke gazed at her with lust-filled eyes. With all the water in her system, she wasn’t nearly as drunk as she had been, and for once, she was just inebriated enough that she didn’t immediately spring an erection under Lexa’s touch. 

It was odd that the perfect amount of alcohol in her system gave her just enough control to keep herself from changing. It seemed that the opposite should have been true. She didn’t care. She was more than happy to have her mate attending to her in such a way. 

At Lexa’s first tentative touch, it had her hips arching up. Clarke had never been touched like this before, and even with just that initial touch, she was shocked at how good it felt. It was entirely different from when Lexa touched her cock. 

As Lexa explored, Clarke decided that while different, many of the new sensations she was feeling were even better than what she had ever experience before. She bit the knuckles of her left hand when Lexa dipped her fingers between her soaked folds, not wanting to wake their pup with her screams. Never ever had Clarke been so wet before, and her mate took advantage of this and thrust a finger into her mate.

“Oh my…Lex,” Clarke yelled. She’d never been penetrated, but she sure as hell was an instant fan of it. 

Encouraged, Lexa moved her finger in and out. When she added a second finger, Clarke’s eyes rolled into the back of her head, and a constant keening came from her mouth. She nearly blacked out when suddenly, she felt Lexa’s tongue swirling over her clit in the same way she loved to do it to Lex.

Her omega mate was thoroughly dominating her with her fingers and tongue, and Clarke didn’t want it to end. She wasn’t sure what she was saying, but the alpha was pretty sure she was begging her mate not to stop. When she felt the zinging, building pressure forming inside herself, she didn’t know what to do. She was about to come, and she’d had no idea it was even possible for it to happen this way to a female alpha. She gasped, moaned, cried out, and maybe even yelled to the heavens that there was a god on Earth, and her name was Lexa kom Trikru. 

She fisted her hands in Lexa’s hair and continued to beg, and when she finally fell over the edge, bright lights exploded behind her closed eye lids, and she gushed all over Lexa’s hand. Hips that she hadn’t even been aware of holding up, dropped unceremoniously onto the furs, and based on the wetness under her butt, she had a feeling the furs wouldn’t be coming clean any time soon.

She huffed, catching her breath, and was finally able to open her eyes. They were glazed over and hard to focus, but when she finally zeroed in on her mate, Lexa was just pulling her two fingers out of her mouth, and the sight had the alpha coming again.

Lexa moved on top of her mate, kissing her. Clarke blinked when she tasted herself on Lexa’s lips. Her eyes closed again when Lexa tweaked a pert nipple in her fingers. For the next twenty minutes, Lexa worked her mate over again by just touching her ample breasts.

After Clarke came again, Lexa said, “I don’t spend enough time taking care of you. You are always taking care of me.”

It was true, even during the wildest parts of their shared rut and heat, Clarke made sure her mate was taken care of and satisfied. Never having been the typical alpha, she somehow controlled her raging hormones and made sure to put her mate first every time they made love in their bed and every time they had filthy, raunchy, mind-blowing sex on the balcony, on the couch, in the bathroom, and on just about every other surface of their home in the tower. 

The sweaty alpha grinned at the omega. Her mate had utterly exhausted her. If she hadn’t, Clarke would have turned the tables and pinned her omega to the bed, but she couldn’t just then. She was feeling completely boneless. 

“Above all else, it is my job to take care of you, you and Madi and the wee little one in your belly when he or she comes,” Clarke stated seriously. “They can call me Wanheda, and I may be the mate of the Commander and have official duties, but our family will always come first. I will always take care of you, Lex.”

The omega’s face flushed a light shade of pink in pleasure at her mate’s words. She brushed her nose over Clarke’s prominent collar bone then nipped at it making the alpha squeak. “I know you will, hodnes, but I meant that you take care of me sexually. I’ve rarely been able to give you the same attention you give to me.”

“I am selfish that way,” Clarke teased. “I enjoy taking care of you…sexually. That being said, I will let you do what you just did anytime you want. That was…you made me feel not like an alpha, but like a woman.”

Lexa captured a pale rose-colored nipple in her mouth and swirled her lips around it, making Clarke arch her hips. “You may be an alpha, ai tombom (my heart), but you are always all woman, and even better than that, you are my woman.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who is excited for them to have another pup. It might be soon, but life on the ground can be short, so I think it's great that they are going to be able to add to their family.
> 
> I think things on this story will be wrapping up soon. I am thinking maybe 28-30 chapters. I am already writing another story that I am excited about, and of course there's another idea wanting to butt in and take over. We will see. For those of you who read the recent chapter of Modified Independent, thank you so much for the comments. I will be getting to them soon. I promise.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot express how happy I am that Spring is on our doorsteps. If you are like me, you are ready for more daylight, chirping birds, leaves on trees, and warmth. Pretty soon I will be grumping about the heat, but for now, I will take these longer days and enjoy them.
> 
> Happy reading.

Chapter 24

If Lexa hadn’t been stuck in the bathroom so often, she would have been on the rampage in the streets of Polis. 

While this pregnancy was easier than her last one because she was already miserable in the cell she was imprisoned in last time, there were things about this one that had her maybe not equally as miserable, but certainly almost as uncomfortable.

She was constantly running to the bathroom. Per Abby, her kidneys were in overdrive, but at the same time the rest of her lower body was stopped up, and Clarke’s mother was forcing her to drink warm prune juice every morning and evening. Lexa wasn’t a picky eater, but she had come to hate the foul juice.

She was also irritable, and her breasts were exceedingly achy, and every time Clarke accidentally, or purposefully, brushed against them, she snapped at her poor alpha, only to immediately apologize to her mate. 

She even barked at Abby the other day, and her mother-in-law had only laughed. Abby was fully aware of the stages of pregnancy, and told Lexa her grouchiness, urinary frequency, constipation, and stuffy nose were perfectly normal, in fact, they were excellent signs. It meant the omega’s hormone were working just as they should be. 

Lexa was perfectly healthy, Abby had said, and one really good thing, the doctor had reminded her, was that she was not experiencing morning sickness. 

“Don’t jinx me,” she had said then. “I didn’t have it last time either, although, that might have been because I was constantly aching from hunger already.”

Abby swept Lexa into her arms. “I am so sorry you had to go through all of that.” The older alpha shook her head. Remembering just how skinny and malnourished the omega had been when Clarke brought her to Arkadia. Neither Clarke nor Lexa knew just how bad off the omega had been then. 

Lexa had been perilously close to death, and had she been any other person, she probably would have died. It was only Lexa’s precious black blood, and perhaps the spirit of Heda, that kept her alive long enough for Abby to intervene and bring her back to health.

Clarke knocked on the bathroom door. She had been walking on eggshells the last couple of weeks, not wanting to add to her mate’s stress and irritability by saying or doing something wrong. She knew Lexa never meant to get grumpy with her, and that it was her rapidly changing hormones, but sometimes she couldn’t help but let it hurt when Lexa barked at her.

Abby had assured her it came with the territory of being a sire, and that in a few more weeks, the omega’s moods would even out.

“Never take what she says seriously, Clarke. She doesn’t mean any of it. In fact, I am sure every time she gets terse with you, she feels guilty,” Abby had said.

“I know, she apologizes every time, but I feel like I can’t do anything right.”

Abby smiled and patted her child’s cheek. “I remember those days. Your father would get so angry at me for nothing at all. One day he yelled because he couldn’t find his favorite screwdriver. He screamed at me and brought me to tears. It might have been the first time he had ever made me cry.”

Clarke was surprised. She had never heard this before. It was hard to imagine her father yelling. He was always so gentle and caring.

“He spent the next week being eaten alive by the guilt, especially because not five minutes after yelling at me, he found his screwdriver exactly where it should have been. It was in his toolbox all along. He felt so terrible that he traded a week’s worth of after-work labor to get a piece of steel and make me a new scalpel. I still have it you know…the scalpel.”

Clarke smiled. It made her feel better to know her mom had experienced the same thing. “Don’t worry, hon, it gets better, and she can’t help it. She’s experiencing things she never has before, and it’s scary for her.”

The blonde’s face fell thinking of Lexa experiencing all this alone the first time. “I wish I could have been there for her the first time.” 

“I know, sweetheart,” Abby said, “and you will probably regret it for the rest of your life, but it was a situation out of your control. There was nothing you could do about it, but there is this time.”

Abby moved around the room putting away medical supplies. She had just gotten a delivery from Arkadia, and Raven was going to be there in just a few minutes to help her get it all working. 

“Just be there for her,” Abby said. “Love her especially when she feels unlovable.” 

Raven came in just then with the typical grin she always wore on her face. “Trouble in paradise, Clarkey?”

Clarke growled. “Don’t call me that.” She glared at her friend. “Were you spying?”

“Nope, but I couldn’t help but overhear.” Raven hobbled over, a mess of wires and other things Clarke couldn’t identify in her hands. She deposited the ungainly mess on a table. “Anya told me to expect Lexa to get a little…angry. It’s an omega Nightblood thing. What I might experience as an omega is tenfold for a Nightblood. Add being Heda to the mix, and you have one explosive combination.” 

Raven moved over to her friend and gave her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “Don’t worry, Clarke, we are all here for both of you, and Anya has volunteered to just stand there and let Lexa beat the crap out of her if that’s what your mate needs.”

“I did no such thing,” Anya argued, coming through the door with an equally large bundle of wires and electronic doodads. “She can use the training dummies for that. Maybe I will paint one with your face and let her pummel it since you seem to think it’s okay to let Heda pummel me.”

“No one will be pummeling anyone. I will train with Lexa from now on,” Clarke stated with finality. “I need more training, and no offense, but no one, not even you, are going to touch my mate while she is pregnant.”

Anya held her hands up. “I would expect nothing less, Wanheda.”

Despite being a devoted and doting puppy around her mate, Clarke had become fiercely protective of her omega, and was always on edge when anyone got too close. 

Lexa’s hormones were changing, but so were the blonde’s, and she found herself wanting to rip out the throat of anyone who displeased her omega even in the slightest way.

The only people Clarke could stand to be around her mate without causing any anxiety or misplaced anger were Abby and Svart.

Abby came as no surprise, but Svart did, and the only thing Clarke could chalk it up to was him being her mate’s sire, and maybe the fact that he had been doing everything in his power to make up for the two decades of Lexa’s life that he had missed. 

It didn’t hurt that Madi adored her komfona (grandfather). Their pup could be screaming her little lungs out, absolutely inconsolable, but if Svart walked into the room, she would instantly stop crying. 

It made Clarke, Lexa, and Abby all a little bit jealous that he had won Madi’s heart so thoroughly, although each would admit that as they got to know the alpha better, he was undeniably charming. Even the Natblidas adored him, and it wasn’t unlike him to be found under a pile of the pups as they play wrestled with the man. Aden, in particular, seemed to take a shine to Svart, and it warmed the hearts of everyone to see the young pup trying to emulate him.

Svart even spent extra time with the boy, training him, and giving the young omega the fatherly love the pup had missed out on. 

Svart was doing the exact thing with Lexa. He’d been especially doting since his arrival in her life. Each morning, he went out and cut fresh flowers for the omega, and at least twice per week, he made Lexa the rabbit porridge she had loved so much as a tiny pup. 

He showered her with affection and gifts, but most importantly, he was there for her, day and night. There were a few times that Clarke woke up alone in bed only to find her mate sipping tea with her nontu (father) in one of the libraries in the middle of the night. 

Lexa enjoyed hearing stories about her nontu’s life. It hadn’t been an easy one, but it was one that had kept him as near as possible to his daughter. Unbeknownst to her, he had even volunteered during some of Heda’s battles as a cook, a groom for the horses, or any job that would allow him close proximity to her.

Anya was a huge help in this. He’d had to keep himself covered up for fear of being recognized, and every morning Anya’d had to scent mark him because he smelled too much like Heda, but the effort was worth it, and he had gotten to see his daughter in battle, slaying her enemies with an effortless grace.

Svart regaled his daughter with stories about herself as seen through his eyes, and his pride in her was evident. He also told her stories about what her nomon (mother) was like. Those stories had made Clarke cry, but Lexa had not. She simply soaked them in and held his words close to her heart. 

Clarke knocked on the bathroom door again. She knew it wasn’t locked and that she could go in, but she didn’t want to barge in on her mate lest she get yelled at. “I have something for you when you are ready to come out, Lex.”

She heard a splashing of water, and the rustling of fabric, probably the towel, and then her mate slinked out of the bathroom, looking small and upset.

“I am sorry I have been yelling at you,” the omega started. “I know Abby said the fluctuations in my mood are normal, but I don’t want to keep taking it out on you. I never meant to take it out on you.”

Clarke pulled Lexa to her and enveloped her in her alpha scent. “I know, and just remember that in a few weeks, things will even out, and you won’t exactly feel like your normal self because then you will start showing, but your moods won’t be so volatile.”

She led the omega over to their sitting room. Above the couch was a new picture hanging on the wall. It was covered with a large linen sheet.

“I have something for you,” Clarke said. “Close your eyes.”

“Klark.”

“Beja, just do it.”

“Kei.”

Once Clarke was sure that Lexa’s eyes were firmly shut, she removed the sheet. “Okay, open them.”

Lexa’s hand flew to her mouth, and her eyes started to water. Before her was a vividly lifelike painting of their little family. In it, she stood next to Clarke and she was holding Madi. Behind them was a lush, forested landscape. She was stunned.

“Yu don disha (You did this)?” She asked in wonder. She had seen some of Clarke’s drawings before, but never had she seen something she had painted. She wanted to climb on the couch and touch the painting. Everything in it seemed so real.

“I did, and I purposefully painted it so I can add to it when the new little one is born.” The alpha placed a protective hand on Lexa’s belly.

Lexa looked closely at the magnificent piece of art. Every detail, down to each strand of hair on their heads was perfect, and the forest behind them even had hidden woodland creatures that could only be seen with serious study. It must have taken her mate hours and hours to do this.

As she studied the forest, she realized where it was. “This is the part of the woods where I watched over you as you slept after we escaped from the Pauna.”

“It is. It holds a special place in my heart.”

Lexa tipped her head. “Why?”

“It’s where I realized that I was truly, madly, and deeply in love with you.”

Lexa was surprised because it was the same day for her as well. “Me too, but it was when you wouldn’t leave me to die and insisted on saving me.” 

Clarke chuckled. “I’m shocked. As I remember it, you weren’t entirely gracious in your acceptance of that. You told me that I wavered when it was time to make hard choices instead of saying thank you.”

Lexa wanted to duck her head in shame. “I was nothing but Heda then, a shell of what I am now. I didn’t know what it was to have to thank someone for something like that. I had been told actions like yours were weakness. You made the choice with your heart that day. I had always been taught to use my head.”

The omega rested her head on her alpha’s shoulder. “This is the best gift I have ever been given next to you, Madi, and our new pup. It’s beautiful, Klark. Stunning. I knew you were talented, but I didn’t know you were this gifted.”

“Honestly, I didn’t know I was either. Paint was scarce up on the Ark. All I ever had to draw with were a few worn pencils and some chalk.” 

“I will make sure you have the finest paints from now on,” Lexa promised. “Maybe someday you would let me watch you paint.” 

“I would really like that. Maybe you could paint with me,” Clarke offered with a smile.

“Ai…sha. The arts were frowned upon by Titus and the Order. I wouldn’t mind learning a thing or two from a master.”

The alpha snorted. “I am no master. This was beginner’s luck.”

Lexa rolled her eyes. “This painting is not beginner’s luck. No beginner could have done this. You have real talent, talent that you should share with the rest of Polis. Maybe you could paint a mural at the base of the tower that represents the twelve clans.”

“Yeah? You would want me to do that?” Clarke was beyond touched.

“I would, and I think anyone who saw this would want it too.”

“Okay, then I will do it,” the alpha agreed chirpily. 

“What are you doing?” Bellamy pushed open the door to their quarters. Clarke had forgotten that he was coming up. Octavia, Lincoln and Jasper were behind him.

Lexa pointed at the painting.

“Holy shit, Clarke” Bellamy exclaimed. “That’s amazing.”

“Whoa, Clarke. I had no idea you could do that,” Octavia moved closer to study the painting. “That’s incredible.”

Lincoln, always so quiet, gave her a look that told the blonde that he admired what she had done.

“Thanks, you guys. Now, did you bring everything?”

“We did. Give us five minutes to set up,” Bellamy said.

“What’s going on?” Lexa asked suspiciously, narrowing her eyes.

Clarke shuffled her feet, suddenly unsure if her idea was a good one. She wanted to do something nice for her mate, but Lexa had been acting so out of character lately, that she was rapidly doubting herself.

“Well, there was a tradition on the Ark that we had when someone was going to have a pup. Friends and family would throw a party and give baby gifts to the expectant parents.”

“It’s called a baby shower,” Octavia interrupted. She was vibrating with excitement. “I’ve never been to one, you know, living under the floor for most of my life, but Bell used to tell me about them. You get loads of gifts, play silly games, and eat far too many sweets.”

Clarke searched Lexa’s face trying to gauge if her mate was pleased or about to erupt in anger. She burst out in laughter when Lexa said, “I don’t know about this, I don’t want to have a party underneath a shower of water. The presents will get ruined.”

It took under fifteen minutes for the gang to set everything up in their sitting area. It was a large space, and all they had to do was move a few tables and chairs to make space for presents. It was a gorgeous day, so the doors to the balcony were opened, and the sunlight streamed in. 

Lexa was made to sit while all this was going on. As the expectant mother, she was not allowed to help. This did not extend to the sire. Clarke was used to move the furniture around seeing as she was one of the strongest people in the room.

The amount of food brought in made even Lexa’s eyes bulge. Most of it was made by the cooks, but Svart decided to teach Abby how to cook Lexa’s favorite rabbit porridge, and along with that he taught her how to make honey cookies. These Lexa eyed from her seat, and Abby sneakily gave her one in a folded napkin.

Lexa smiled at how close Abby and Svart were getting. Abby was still a mamma bear when it came to protecting the omega, but Svart was quickly working his way into her good graces. It helped that he had become good friends with Marcus. 

The three oddly spent many of their nights together playing poker. Marcus was teaching both Abby and Svart how to play, and they were planning a tournament against the delinquents knowing full well they would cream them at cards. Abby teased it was a way to win Monty’s best hooch instead of having to trade for it. Clarke had secretly wondered if the duo of Marcus and Abby was going to become a trio that included Svart.

Lexa had paled at this. Polyamorous relationships weren’t frowned upon in the Coalition, in fact they were quite common, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to see her father in any kind of relationship just yet, even if it was with Abby and Marcus. She was just getting to know the man, and while it was a selfish desire, she hoped to have the majority of his attention for at least a little while longer.

When Lexa had asked what Clarke thought about it, her mate was unsure. There were no poly relationships on the Ark that she knew about, and she was still coming to terms that Abby was with Marcus, but in the end, she decided that “love is love,” and if they all loved each other then she would be okay with it.

Afterwards, she said she hoped she was wrong and that Svart was only becoming their good friend.

Clarke came and sat next to Lexa. The blonde had changed. When they weren’t attending to official business, Clarke could usually be found in her signature shorts and a tank top. Now, however, she was wearing a dress Lexa had never seen before.

Before she knew what she was doing, she reached out and touched the fabric. It was silky and designed with a flower pattern. She wondered where Clarke had gotten it. The material could only have come from the southern part of the Glowing Forest. The Trishana kru was known for its textiles. They had talented weavers, but their goods came at a hefty price tag. She would have to remember to ask her mate later how she had procured such an expensive dress.

“You like it?” Clarke asked.

“I do, very much,” Lexa replied, the slight rumble of a purr in her voice. “Good, then go and change. There is a dress laid out for you on the bed.”

“Come with me?”

Clarke chuckled. “I had better not because once I see you in that dress, I am immediately going to want to see you back out of it again, and I would hate to keep our guests waiting.”

“Too bad. I was hoping to get you out of yours.”

“Later, I promise,” Clarke winked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my gosh. The cuteness of it all. Next chapter we will finally learn what Octavia's punishment was for spying on her Hedas. Trust me, she's getting off easy. Clarke had huge plans, but Lexa talked her out of them.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you all so much for reading. Please leave comments and kudos. I cherish each and every one, and I promise to respond to every comment.
> 
> If there are any tags I missed, please let me know. I don't want to cause any triggers because of what happened with Lexa. Like I said, as readers you don't know all the details yet, but I do not want it to be disturbing for anyone.


End file.
